Title: I Can't Stop Loving You
Christmas Present for: aricadavidson on LiveJournal
Summary: She was going, and he couldn't let go...
Rating: G
Pairings/Characters: Booth/Brennan established relationship
A/N: The song is "I Can't Stop Loving You" by Keith Urban. From his new CD "Love, Pain and the Whole Crazy Thing" for anyone wondering. OH, and Brennan's going by train instead of airplane because... I said she was. And I'm the author, so what I say goes. So hmph!

I Can't Stop Loving You

Slowly, he traced the line of her spine, through her cottony nightgown, with a finger. His touch was feather soft, softer than her nightgown, softer than even her skin, so as not to awake her. He didn't want to interrupt her precious sleep.

Sleep.

He didn't know how she could sleep. He definitely couldn't. Not with all that was on his mind… Not with knowing that this would be their last night together. That tomorrow, she would be leaving him behind for a "better life" somewhere else. That tomorrow, he was going to have to say goodbye as she left.

That thought troubled him more than she would ever know.

So you're leaving
In the morning
On the early train
I could say everything's all right…
and I could pretend and say goodbye…

She was going. She was really, truly going. Leaving him. And he knew all of this as fact in his head. But somehow, his heart just couldn't comprehend it. He didn't know how to explain why, other than saying it was his undying love for her that wouldn't let him accept her leaving.

He remembered the day she said she was leaving. When he had come home to find her sitting on the couch, waiting for him. With a formal looking letter clutched in hand. When she announced to him that this relationship wasn't working for her anymore. That she'd been offered a job across the country.

And that she was going to take it.

He had started to suggest that he could go with her; that they could try and work things out. And she wouldn't hear of it. She said she still cared about him enough not to let him uproot himself and follow her across the country when they knew how things were going to turn out.

He remembered standing by and watching her pack across this last week. When she had taken everything that she still had here, and packed it into a pair of suitcases. He wished like crazy that he was among the things she wanted to take with her.

And he remembered that same faint smile that she showed him every single time she looked at him. That same sad smile that tore at his heart.

He remembered taking her in his arms earlier this night, and kissing the top of her head. And murmuring in her ear that he was sorry for whatever it was he didn't do right. And her softly replying that it wasn't anything he did. That it was just the way things went. And he had only nodded quietly, making her think that he agreed.

You got your ticket
You got your suitcase
You got your leaving smile
I could say that's the way it goes
I could pretend and you won't know that I was lying

He let his hand fall from caressing her back, and let it fall against the covers. He was remembering what she'd said that first day when she announced that she was leaving. When she said that things weren't working anymore, she said that she doubted love could last forever. And she thought their love had reached its end.

He told her that love could last forever, and maybe theirs wasn't over yet.

She said she couldn't believe that.

Though he never said it out loud to her, the thought, Tempe, I can't stop loving you, ran through his mind several times during that conversation. And in the days that followed. And it was running through his head right now.

Gently, he scooted across the space between himself and his partner. He pressed against her, reflexively contouring to her position. And he possessively wrapped an arm around her midsection. Though she was asleep, she reflexively wrapped her arm around his.

He laid a gentle, feather soft kiss on her bare shoulder, and then laid his head back down. Atop a few stray locks of her chestnut hair he laid it, and he breathed in the scent of her. He committed the smell to memory – though, really, it was already firmly planted there – to get him through the lonely nights that were sure to follow.

And he couldn't resist the words on his lips.

"I love you," he whispered softly. "Tempe, I can't stop loving you."

'Cause I can't stop loving you
I can't stop loving you
No I can't stop loving you
Though I tried

The drive to the train station was as silent and still as could possibly be. Brennan didn't have anything to say, and Booth didn't know what he could say. Everything that would be appropriate – like "Good luck somewhere else" or "It's alright" or "That's the way it goes" – would be a lie.

And everything he wanted to say, she obviously didn't want to hear.

So instead of speaking, he prayed silently to God that somehow, someway, she would change her mind. That she would give things another chance, and that she wouldn't go. That things would work out right.

It was going to be futile, though, he knew. Even divine power wouldn't change Temperance Brennan's mind once it was made up and set.

All too soon for Booth's liking, the car ride was over, and he was parking at the station. Both of them sat frozen for a moment after he turned the car off, the realization that this was the real end sinking in. Then she opened her door, and stepped out. She went to the back of the SUV and got her suitcases, and as she was pulling them out, he sighed and stepped out of the car himself.

We went down to the station
And not a word was said
I saw you walk across the road
for maybe the last time, I don't know

Here they were, standing at the end of the line, figuratively speaking. The point at which their relationship would likely end. And literally speaking, they were standing at the beginning of the line. The station from which Brennan's train would leave, westward bound.

They were running a tad late, and moments after they got to the platform, the final boarding call was issued.

Dropping her suitcases, Brennan stepped forward and wrapped Booth in a quick hug. She probably thought that after all that they'd been through in their relationship, a parting hug was the least that she could do. And he hugged her back with a ferocity born of his unwillingness to let her go.

Brennan let go first, and Booth reluctantly followed suit. Brennan took a half step back, and looked at him, offering that same sad smile that had appeared so often these past few days. And Booth felt like his heart was literally breaking.

She placed a quick, insignificant kiss on his lips. "Good bye," she said softly.

Booth tried to say good-bye in return, but the word stuck in his throat. He didn't want to say it. He didn't want this to be good-bye. And though he tried, he couldn't get the word out. Brennan didn't wait for him to say it either. She picked up her suitcases and headed towards the train.

Staring at her retreating back, Booth prayed that she would turn around and come running back into his arms. He didn't really expect it to happen, and he wasn't surprised when it didn't. She kept on walking.

He was on the verge of tears now, and it took every ounce of his willpower to keep them down. To keep them from welling up in his eyes too. He wouldn't let her see him cry, and he knew that she would…

Yes, she did.

She paused briefly as she stepped onto the train, and glanced over her shoulder at him, taking one last look at what she was leaving behind. That look didn't change her mind, and after that briefest of seconds, she turned forwards again and kept going.

The train whistle blew, and Booth turned away. He turned his back on her. The moment that he did, all of his willpower was reduced to naught, and the tears started to well up. As he walked back towards his car, they started to silently fall.

I'm feeling humble
I heard a rumble
On the railway tracks
And when I hear that whistle blow
I walked away and you won't know

That I was crying…

She was still on his mind the entire way home. He couldn't get her out of his head now, and he doubted that he would be able to for several months to come. How could he ever get her off of his mind?

Maybe I'll see her again, he thought. Just maybe I will. And maybe I won't see her again.

That thought stuck in his head for a long time. Maybe he would see her again, maybe he wouldn't. Right now, he didn't know. Maybe in the weeks or months to come, Brennan might come to see that she was wrong. Maybe it would take her years.

One thing he knew, though, whether he saw her again or not.

He couldn't stop loving her.

'Cause I can't stop loving you
No, I can't stop loving you
I just can't stop loving
though I tried

I just can't stop loving you
Why do I try?
Why do I try?

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