The shot rings out among the crowd and it takes me a moment to realize that I was the one shot. I fall and as I lie on the ground with the bullet in my chest, the sounds around me seem so distant, almost as if this is a dream and I will wake up any second and find that I'm just having a nightmare in my apartment. Hearing the desperation in Castle's voice, I know that this is just wishful thinking on my part.
The screams and yells are becoming more and more distant but I am anchored by one thing: Castle. He is kneeling above me, putting pressure on the wound like any good cop would (but technically, he's not a cop). He's telling me to hang on, to stay with him and all I want to do is just that, stay with him. We've been dancing around this thing that we have together for far too long and now, it may be too late; the black is starting to become much too appealing to me and his voice isn't enough to keep me here.
Still, the black creeps closer, enticing me to join. Memories are coming back to me of the time before my mother's murder; happy memories that I haven't thought about since she was killed. This is why I want to go into the black. And so, I see that the only viable option is to succumb to the darkness.
I close my eyes and the memories hit me full force. The first was from so many years ago that I had all but forgotten it had even happened. A little girl is standing on the beach, not too far from the water. She turns in my direction and I cannot help but smile at the three year old version of myself.
'If only this Kate knew what she would have to deal with in time.' I think to myself.
Little Kate runs into the water, not far enough to do much damage but enough so that she can just feel the water feely. A lone seagull flies across the sky to where the remainder of its flock sits. Momentarily distracted by the gull, Little Kate doesn't notice the small wave until it crashes just a bit too high onto her legs, touching the part that the water had not yet gotten to previously. A squeal can be heard and there is an indulgent shake of the head from my father. Not one to be too easily distracted, Little Kate reaches forward, palms up and open, face mesmerized by the reflection on the water. I smile to myself as I watch the little girl flick water up and giggle as it splashes around. Somewhere in the difference I am able to hear a woman's voice yelling, 'Katie, don't go near the water!' My smile falters just slightly and the dream-like memory fades away, only to be replaced by another, more recent one.
This memory was of the first time Castle and I had met and I mean the real first time, before the book signing and before his arrest. I was fresh out of the academy and was walking my beat when I spotted him. I immediately recognized him from his Storm books and had to calm myself in order to maintain my professional persona. I gathered as much courage and confidence as possible and walked up to him.
"Excuse me, Mr. Castle?" I muttered.
"Look, now's not a good time." He replied. I took a mental and physical step back and started again.
"Mr. Castle, I'm with the NYPD, is there anything I can help you with?" He gave me a strange look before his face broke into a sheepish grin.
"It's the sun. I have always disliked it greatly and today it decided that it was going to smoulder half the city and it's just put me into a bad mood." I nod my head in agreeance. The NYPD uniforms are not the best in terms of ventilation and keeping cool so I am sympathetic to his situation.
"They called for rain, maybe you'll get a nice cool day after all." I smile at him and walk away, only to stop abruptly as a drop of water hits my forearm. It seemed as though as soon as I looked up, the water began to pour. The birds dispersed, the wind stopped and the sound of rumbling thunder could be heard in every corner of the city. Lightning struck down from the heavens and the rain continued to pour down. I looked back at where Mr. Castle was and he reached towards the heavens with both his hands and face.
He smiled and yelled across the noise, "The Welcome Rain!"
I laughed and shook my head, walking away from the man who would one day become my best friend.
The black is retreating and the pain is increasing, no longer numbed. I have the urge to call out but my throat is too dry to do so. I open my eyes, and, standing above me, is Castle. We exchange smiles and I look outside to see the rain coming down hard, just like that first day.
"The Welcome Rain," he states and all I am able to do is nod.