Hello

Disclaimer:...the usual, i dont own ccs

A Promise-filled Past

They say that, fools are those who don't appreciate things until they are gone. Does that make me, a fool?

My mother died when I was at the tender age of 10, straight after, I learnt that it was because she gave birth to me. That was when I learnt the true meaning of 'death', or at least what it meant, it basically meant the person is never coming back no matter how much you cried at night.

……………………Flash Back…………………………

"Okaachan!" a little girl cried to her mother; with a worried face, the mother shifted her daughter onto the side of the path.

"What's wrong?" asked Nadeshiko, with a motherly smile. She bent down to the same level as her daughter and looked her into her eyes, to see if she was hurt. Concern was increasing within the mother's eyes.

When suddenly, Sakura burst into tears. "Okaachan, gomene. I gave away Kero.'

Kero was the name of the toy that, Nadeshiko made for Sakura, on her 10th birthday. She thought she loved that toy or maybe that was the reason as to why she was crying. But then again, Nadeshiko never was any good at sewing, hence the rather large head on top of a rather small body with wings. Nadeshiko looked on silently as she waited for her daughter's sobs to disappear. As Sakura's sob came to a reasonable stop, she crouched down and wiped away her tears.

"Sweetie, please stop crying. I'll just make you a new one and I promise it won't look as bad." The little girl started to shake her head, in a disagreeing manner.

"Iee, okaachan (no, mother). I loved Kero, so much. But today, Tomoyo chan was crying saying that she wanted Kero, really badly. And I wasn't thinking properly, so I gave it to her. Then she stopped crying and took Kero away." The little girl was about to cry again, as she remembered the recent event.

Nadeshiko, smiled proudly as she said, "Kura, what you did was the right thing, Tomoyo is your cousin and you love her. So, there's nothing to cry about. Unless you want Kero back. Because if you do, I'll speak to Auntie Sonomi about it." Once again, the little girl shook her head, vigorously.

"Iee, okaachan. You see, the thing is…" It can be seen that the little girl was strugglingg with what she was about to say, fear was evident in her eyes. "…aren't you mad at me?"

Shock was then evident in the mother's eyes, but she was quick to recover as her daughter was about to start crying. "Sweetie, please stop crying. I can never be mad at you." And she hushed and hugged her child.

"Promise me, you'll never cry like this again. It really pains me to see, that I'm the cause of this. I love you, your brother and your father so much, that I hate seeing you guys cry. So, promise me, never to cry again; unless you believe you have to."

As it became evident to the little girl that her mother was not mad at her, she smiled and lifted her little pinky finger towards her mother. The mother hooked her own with her daughters. "It's a promise, Okaachan!."

And they walked home together swaying their hands up into the air and back down.

But unknown to the little girl, the mother was worried. It was apparent to her, her only daughter always put everyone else ahead of her and eventhough, it only showed what a wonderful daughter she had; this quality would possibily cause despair on her daughter.

But as they reached home, Nadeshiko stopped, as to look for her keys and as she got a hold of them, she took a glance at her home. Taking a deep breathe and knew time was quickly coming to an end.

"Sakura, when I'm gone. You'll take care of your onni-chan and your otou-san, neh?" Nadeshiko asked her daughter.

"Of course, I love them more then anyone in this world! Where are you going? Are you going to the library? Can I go too?" Sakura replied energetically.

Nadeshiko smiled, "Good, make sure you don't break this promise and no, you definitely can't come with me."

Sakura looked at her mother peculiarly and pouted. Nadeshiko looked at her daughter and laughed as she got inside.

A month later, Nadeshiko left her family behind; for another world.

………………………Flashback ends………………………………………………..

I wanted to keep my promise to mother, so I didn't cry; not when mum went to hospital and was announced dead, not at her funeral and not when I found out I was the cause of her death and that all this time she was fighting to stay alive. I believed the least I could do was keep my promises I made to okaachan. Never cry, and protect my brother and my father, they needed my support then more than ever. There were times in which I felt like crying, or like my mother said, I felt like it was necessary to. But hearing my brother and father cry openly and in the dark, I felt like they were also crying on my behalf, so I didn't have to cry. Or it was simply because I wanted to be strong for my family.

My father fell into depression, right after my mother's death. He couldn't go to work or do any of his daily duties. Which left Touya, my brother holding the family up when he just barely turned 17. I would help with what I can and with whatever I can, I knew this year was really important for Touya, he should be studying as much as he can, in order to get into the university he wanted but now he has to work right after school. And I couldn't do much, I was only 10, I couldn't work legally.

……………………..Flash Back………………………………...

Touya looked at his sister as she washed the dishes and he continued to eat. She had changed, for the better or the worse he didn't know. Sakura was no longer the cry baby she was, whom needed him to watch over her like a hawk. She was no longer the vulnerable little sister, he knew. He felt threatened, did Sakura no longer need him?

Touya also noticed the lack of tears or the non-existent tears cried by Sakura. Their mother was the closest to Sakura. He thought and thought about it, until he realised it was pointless, Sakura wouldn't tell him and bringing their mother up at a time like this was not an option. So he came to the conclusion, Sakura couldn't cry or wouldn't cry. Coming to this conclusion, Touya silently vowed to protect his sister so she had no reason to cry. It was his responsibility, as her older brother; whether she liked it or not.

"Urmm, Oniichan. I made this lunch box for you, I know it's nothing fancy but please eat as much as you can. The last one I made for you, was only half eaten." Sakura had spoken, interrupting Touya's thoughts.

Touya lookd at his sister weirdly and asked, "Why?". It was an absurd question, Touya knew that. He was expecting a raised eyebrow, a question, not an answer.

"Because I need you to be healthy and happy, for me to be happy too. I know it's selfish but…."

Before Sakura could finish her sentence, Touya had gotten up and enveloped his sister in an embrace.

He was needed.

……………………………………………………………………………………………

Two months later, Fujitaka's depression hadn't changed and he was getting thinner and thinner. The siblings worked hard, in order to give their father more time to recover.

……………………………………………………………………………………………

"KAIJUU!I'm going to work, take care of dad! If you have time, prepare beakfast, lunch, tea and dinner. And make sure you don't burn yourself….again" Touya sighed and left. He knew he acted as though Sakura couldn't even take care of herself, but he knew better; once Sakura had her mind on something, she'll get it done. And with no doubt, he trusted her.

"TOUYA!! I'm not a KAIJ…" Sakura's words were cut short as she fell down the remaining five stairs, and so she survived to live another day. She quickly got up, hoping that Touya, her so called "older brother" didn't catch her falling down the stairs …again. She thanked her lucky stars that Touya had already left to work.

For the past few months, Sakura had been looking after her father, whom heart has been shattered into little pieces. It was difficult at times, but she would had done anything for her father to smile his warm smile again.

Sakura had got her dad's breakfast and went to his room but as she entered, she was met with silence and the dullness of the room. The feeling like something, or more like someone was missing, met her. Her mother. Sakura smiled.

"Otou-san (father), I brought your breakfast, it's your favourite pancakes!" Sakura said in her cheerful tone.

"Your mother used to make us pancakes everyday…" said Fujitaka as he stared into the distance. Sakura was used to her father mentioning her mother every now and then. It was, as if, her father didn't want to forget her mother.

"Why are you so happy? Why aren't you upset about your mother's death? You horrid child, I didn't even see you cry!! At you mother's funeral…it was your fault…."

Sakura stood there and took in the words. Those words were only meant for her, whenever Touya was here with her, her father never spoke like that. Fujitaka didn't want to upset Touya. She was glad, she could only imagine what Touya would feel if he heard her father spoke like that, mad. She always knew that Touya was overly protective of her, and it was her fault.

"Gomene." Was Sakura's only reply. Soon after, silence met them.

"Let's have breakfast outside, otou-san! It is cherry blossom season." Sakura said as she broke the silence. She opened the curtains letting the sunshine in, set the breakfast onto the balcony table and turned around to face her father with one of her flashing smiles.

Fujitaka looked at his daughter and guilt was filled within him. He expected to see his daughter cry, like she used to. When had she stopped crying? But as Sakura flashed her smile, Fujitaka was once again reminded of his wife. "Your mum loved cherry blossoms, that's why she named you Sakura. Your mother loved you so much."

Sakura smiled and said, "I know, she loved us all very much." As she helped her father outside to eat.

She saw her father gazing at the cherry blossoms. "Otou-san, how did you meet okaachan?"

Fujitaka smiled at the question, as it brought back many wonderful memories, he smiled again, "Well, it all started when your mum was in high school….".

Sakura noted that she was close, she could feel it.

A couple of hours had passed as Fujitaka recounted his past events with his dear wife. Sakura had knew the story of how her parents met and how it was love at first sight and how they decided to get marry at a rather young age etc. It was her favourite story.

A while after, it was evident that Fujitaka was tired and was feeling rather sleepy. Sakura allowed him to finish off, his latest story.

"Otousan, you see. You don't need to keep mentioning okaasan, in fear you might forget about her. You love okaasan and you'll always have those memories with you. We all miss her dearly. But she's never too far away, because we have our memories of her."

Sakura took a breath and he took the chance to look at her father. He smiled fondly. She was closer.

"I also remembered something okaasan told me. Her most proudest day was marrying you. Otou-san, I know I don't know how you feel at the moment but, I'm here and I always will be. Dad; Touya and me, really need you but please do take your time in recovering; we can wait. We love you. And remember okaasan, never really left us." Sakura had her faced down, she felt like she was about to cry.

Fujitaka took this time to observe his daughter, she had grown so much from the last time he saw her.

"Her most proudest day…huh? She told me her proudest day was having Touya and you." At this Fujitaka laughed, he reached out and gripped his daughter's hand. "Don't start now."

Sakura looked at her father and nodded, swallowing up the tears, she laughed along with her father.

She was there, her father smiled his warm smile.

Sakura smiled and looked at her father, "You must be tired, you should rest now. We'll talk later."

Fujitaka smiled again, as he prepared to go to sleep. Sakura tucked her father in and whispered, "Sweet dreams."

As Sakura was about to make her exit, she heard a faint whisper, "Sakura…". She stopped, at the whisper of her name. "…thank you." And smiled, leaving the room .

……..………………………………………………………………………………………

As soon as she left the room, Sakura headed to the kitchen to do her fair share of duties. Running the house. For the next few hours, Sakura cooked, cleaned the house from top to bottom, checked on her father and lastly she went out to shop for new supplies. It might not sound like much to do, compared to Touya; out at 7am and returns at 11pm but Sakura always tries her best at everything. For the groceries, Sakura goes through catalogues after catalogues to find the best deals available, circling and writing down what she needed all the time.

When she came back, everything was done like usual except for one thing. Her homework. But that didn't bother her much because if it was something else, Sakura knew Touya would come back home and finish it off for her. Thus losing his sleep.

Sakura then made dinner, though this time it was special. She had had dinner with her father, they were talking normally and finally enjoying a meal together. After that, Sakura told her father, he needed to sleep, seeing it was 10 already.

After that, Sakura finished off the dishes and left Touya's meal in the microwave, with a note attached, wishing him sweet dreams for tonight. She then went to do her homework, maths.

…………………………………………………………………………………………

"HOOOOOOOOOEEEEEEE" Sakura woke as she realised it was…morning? She quickly got dressed and went down stairs, hoping that Touya had helped otou-san with his daily tasks. But as usual, Sakura had tripped and fell on the remaining five stairs.

"Ouch…!" Sakura mumbled to herself.

"Sakura dear, are you alright? Next time try using the railing. Breakfast is ready." Sakura froze, she knew that voice.

"Otou-san?" Sakura looked up and saw her father in an apron. "OTOU-SAN…." Sakura shouted and hugged her father. "please tell me, I'm not dreaming?"

Touya smiled at the scene in front of him, he decided to call off work just for today.

He didn't know what happened yesterday during his absence but he was thankful that it did happen. He looked at his sister again, and smiled. His determination to protect his younger sister only grew.

Fujitaka chuckled at his daughter, "No, silly. This isn't a dream. I'm sorry for taking so long."

"No…it was understandable. Touya and me understood, you just needed some time" Sakura muffled, as she buried her head into her father's shoulder.

"From now on, it's all happy sailing" Fujitaka announced.

"Hai!" Sakura replied.

…………….End of Flash Back………….

I smiled at that, it was all happy sailing after that. My father was gaining his heath and Touya quitted his part time jobs, in order to concentrate on his studies.

But then all good things comes to an end. My brother got into the university he had wanted but he had to move in order to attend, the university was just too far away. I supported him, it was his dream. But he was leaving me. And I was only 12 and he hardly came home to visit. But I understood and everyday, he would call to check up on me; I would feel really special and sometimes I would call him.

Then my dad, an archaeologist, for his job he got a promotion, he had to travel around the world to different sites. Once again, he was leaving me. But I encouraged him to go. I was a big girl age 14. Plus, he'd be home once in a while, unlike Touya. And like what I did with Touya, I would also often call my dad.

But then came THE day, a day in which led me to make the wrong decision. I was a year 10 then, on the last week of school, I had gotten into a fight. I may had made the first move, but it was them who started it and kept on pushing it. In the end, I was sent to the principal's office. The principal couldn't get ahold of father, thus he asked me for the number. I didn't want father knowing, that i had gotten into a fight. He'll be very mad and disappointed in me. So, instead for the very first time in my life, I chose to lie.

I told him, I didn't know, that the number he was given was the one that i always acquired. I wasn't thinking properly. The principal told me to wait outside, the office. As i left the office, a big gush of guilt ran over me. Half an hour later, although it seemed longer, the principal called me back in.

"We've got ahold of the number." The principal said as I closed the door.

I frozed, I really sucked at lying.

"We got it through your older brother, Touya. I've spoken with them both, and they both sound terribly disappointed in you. Seeing, this is your first offence and the year is coming to an end, take this as your warning. You can go home."

I felt like crying, Touya too?

But I decided not to, not over this.

When I got home, I didn't take initiative to phone my father or brother, I didn't want to hear their disppointed voices.

And for the same reason, I didn't pick up the phone either.

……………………………………………………………………………………………..

A year past and Christmas Eve came, the holiday usually spent with the family but I wasn't expecting anything. We hardly contacted each after, I decided to stop calling. I didn't want to brother them.

It was 1pm that afternoon; the door bell rung, as i set up the christmas tree by myself. I stood up and went to open the door, only to have my father and brother. standing there.

Tears were about to flow out of my eyes until I heard a "Don't" from their mouths. I ran into their arms and gave them the biggest hug I could muster.

"I missed you, so much, so so much." Two nods were my reply. Men.

We went into the house and it finally felt like we were a family again.

……………………………………………………………………………………………..

Christmas day then came along the next day and so did hell. Once again the doorbell rung but instead of good news, came bad news. Two officers.

"Urm, good morning. Can I help you?"

"Are you Kinomoto Sakura? Daughter to Kinomoto Fujitaka and younger sister of Kinomoto Touya?" one of the officers asked.

I wanted to say no, his voice was laced with bad news. "What happened?" I asked, forgetting all about my manners. I was shaking.

"I'm afraid. Your father and brother went out late last night. They were in a car accident. Your father passed away on impact and your brother was seriously injured, he's in the hospital now."

Time stood still, for me, for that very moment. But I had to get out, I have somewhere I needed to be.

"Please, take me there! Please." I had begged them, they agreed.

…………………………………………………………………………………………

They just came back, please don't take them away again. Please. I whispered to God, on the way to the hospital.

When I arrived, they lead me to Touya's room. He was wrapped with bandages everywhere. The handsome, smug, overly protective brother, where are you? I was about to…, no, no, there's no time to cry.

I saw the doctor, he looked down, "I'm afraid he doesn't have much time. Do make the most of it."

I ran to Touya's side, as my eyes met his, he smiled. Why are you smiling?

"Looks, like I don't have the chance to protect you no longer…"

"Touya, no! You'll be okay! Please, just don't. You'll always protect me, like you always said. So, please, don't talk and just rest."

"Kaijuu, please let me talk. I know I don't have much time left. So, please just listen."

I held back a sob and nodded.

Touya smiled, "That's my kaijuu. I'm sorry."

I gave him a confused look. What is he on about?

"I always said, I'll protect you. But that was just it, I just said it. I never really did do anything, did I?"

I shook my head, furiousily. "No, you did. When we were on the phone, you always gave me advice, tips…everything on what I should do. I really am lucky, to have a brother like you. The other girls at school are spoilt and believes that money and boys are what makes the world do round but you taught me better. Thank you, for protecting me, onniichan."

Onni-chan you did so much more. I knew you'd protect me and for that very reson I was willing to take risks.

Touya smiled and her words, had he really done that much?

"Sakura, thank you. And I guess, I'm sorry too. I'm going to leave you alone by yourself, once again."

"No, you'll always watch over me, be with me, protect me. You said so….remember?"

Why are they all leaving me?

"I will, I swear. But know now you have to protect yourself because I can no longer protect you, like I used to….Promise me, you'll look after yourself and obtain happiness, you truly deserve."

Touya

"…How do I know if I truly deserve it?"

"Kaijuu, you deserve all the happiness in the world. Please, promise me"

I could see Touya start to struggle to keep awake. I nodded, looping my pinky finger with his.

"And don't forget it, the promise you made to me and mum."

"How did you…" I had started but was interrupted by Touya.

"I know you…"

Followed by that was the long beep from the machine across from the bed.

…………………………………………………………………………………………

Please review, this is actually my first fanfic story. All reviews are welcomed.

RR