Was It Worth It
There was blood and pain accompanied by tears that fell upon my face as I looked up at my daughter. Oh, yea I'm dying funny I would have never thought that when it's finally my turn I wouldn't want to go. I have longed for death for the longest time but there was always a little something keeping me alive for better or worse. To think that after everything I've been through I would die like this. It wasn't a happy life far from it but it was my life and I am thankful for it.
Please stop crying how am I supposed to die if you don't stop crying. You are probably the only thing in this world that I did right. Never would I have thought I would have a daughter me out of all people me it amazes me. You are beautiful far too beautiful to be my daughter I don't deserve it.
Throughout my life, I have been called many things monster, beast, animal, the devil but you call me Daddy it makes me sad how I'll never be able to tell you how happy that simple word makes me. God I'm scared so, so scared that I'll never see her grow up scared that I'll never hear those words ever again. But what I'm most scared of and guilty of is leaving her alone in this godforsaken world.
God I've never been a religious man and I'm still not but if you are up there please keep my daughter save my only precious daughter.
It's getting darker I'm feeling tired the sound of her weeping seems farther away harder to hear. I'm suffocating it hurts god it hurts I can barely see her its blurry.
More time I know it's impossible but if only I had more time.
As I look at her gradually disappearing image a sudden thought assaults me.
YOU WERE WORTH IT