I couldn't take this much longer. It was just getting silly.
It was just an obsession, that didn't even fascinate me, it just hurt me. A lot.
Every time I closed my eyes, her face appeared. And always it pained me to know I could only think of her like this in my mind. Her eyes would stare up at me, green and full of energy. I mean why wouldn't they be. So much had happened to her in the past year or so, so she needed the energy to keep up.
Her eyes would narrow when she smiled up at me, her red lips stretching back across her pale, yet flawless skin.
The way she would look at me in my dreams, led me to do things I could only imagine of doing for real. I knew these thoughts were impure, but I was just a teenager in love, who could do nothing more than visualize.
I knew she could never belong to me.
I knew she would always belong to that leech.
He must have been a cunning and sly being, being able to taint Bella with his 'perfect' face and 'incessant' charm.
I could and would never understand how the girl with the heartbeat, fell in love with the man with an immobile one.
Why wouldn't she love me?
I had a heartbeat, I could live as she did, I could give her things he couldn't. I could be anything she wanted me to be.
I just couldn't be Edward.
And that was all she wanted. All she needed.
The bloodsucker. The leech. The murderer.
And me, I was just the teenage wolf boy, who fell in love too young, with the wrong girl.
And it ran through my mind. That one question.
Is it impossible to stop loving someone, who completely screwed you over, yet changed your life into something more complicated?
I guess the only way I could find the answer to that question, was to just watch. Watch with my weary eyes as they were happy together.
Three always was a crowd..