When Raven sets the phone in her hand, it looks like perhaps it's ten years too advanced, but nothing else stands out as unique.
"So press your thumb into the center, then raise it to eye level. It'll ask for your voice recognition sample and you'll be in." Monty says, an easy smile on his face as she presses her thumb against the screen.
"You two don't think that's excessive for cell phone security? Like extremely excessive? The worst that ever happens if you lose your phone or it gets stolen is you shut it down online and buy a new one." Both of their faces grow instantly more serious than she has ever seem them and they adjust their posture to more match a set of ridiculously ingenious inventors slash scientists.
"Listen. Do not lose this phone. Or more importantly allow for it to be stolen from you. Ever, by anyone. Or let anyone pull the 'my batteries dead can I use yours' bullshit." Raven, eyes laser focused on her own.
"Okaaaaay. Sure. Be super secret spy Clarke with the phone. Want to explain why to me?" Monty sighs, and though still stern featured, his posture relaxes enough to sit more comfortably in his chair.
"Have you looked at the phone? We're years and years ahead of the big consumer tech companies. Entirely flexible, self healing screen, friction charging, other stuff, obviously. If they get their hands on this they can and will turn all of our hard work into more green to coat their pockets. Not to mention I just don't want them having our tech. They'll release it and the world isn't ready Clarke. So yes, be very careful, and tell us immediately if you lose the phone or, more importantly, it's stolen." The younger man says, both of their serious faces causing Clarke to nod.
"I get it. And thanks for the phone by the way. What else should I know about it?" She pulls over a metal stool, sitting down and restarting the entire security process. After the thumb press, she raises it up to eye level, turned on it's side, the screen coming to life to show the scan as it matched with it's reference.
"Now say, Monty and Raven are the best ever." The grinning woman managed to get out between her laughing. Clarke's unamused look just earned more hearty chuckles from both of them, so she just rolled her eyes.
"Monty and Raven are the best ever." She said dryly, watching as her two high school friends high fived.
"Welcome, Clarke." A voice said, slightly husky but light in tone, lacking that obvious hallmark of computer produced voice. It sounded real, as if a woman was standing in front of her. Clarke didn't even try to figure out how these two had managed it. Just as they'd obviously somehow had her thumb print, retinal scan, and voice recording.
The home screen design was clean and simple, minimalistic. Something Clarke usually had to spend a few minutes installing a launcher to get on a new phone. Her information was already all there and she smiled at her two best friends, nodding.
"Awesome. Thanks you two. Is awesome, want to get pizza and beer? On me."
"Better be on you, Blondie!" Raven announced, standing from her chair to stretch her arms.
"She's maybe right. We did kind of give you a ten year one up on everyone else's phone bragging. Can we get that white cheesy garlic pie we tried last time?" Clarke nodded her acceptance and led the way out of their lab and up onto a wide snow covered commons at MIT. It was February, nearing the end of winter, and unnecessarily cold outside as far as Clarke was concerned. Not that she didn't love the kind of weather that gave her an excuse to stay inside alone and warm cuddled on her couch with a hot chocolate and Netflix perpetually on her TV screen.
To be honest she barely used her phone before she'd thrown it clear across her living room and into her wall. She was antisocial, yes, and exceedingly private. Sensitive and easily hurt. Which she was. Hence the phone tossing. The summer before she'd met and far too quickly fallen in love with a man she'd met in a bookstore. They'd gotten close, started dating, Clarke fell as always, and then he got drunk and cheated on her, promptly falling in love with the other woman where he hadn't with Clarke herself.
She had of course been a mess for quite a while, taking to being even more reclusive, barely leaving her apartment. Then he'd called her, just about a week ago, and Clarke had promptly launched her phone into a wall. Which led her to now, tightening her coat around her shoulders and burying her nose in her scarf as they turned the corner towards the local pizza shop. Her new phone was a little warm in her pocket and she hummed thankfully, speeding up to press a gentle hand against the small of Raven's back as the 'mechanic' limped towards their favorite pizza shop.
"So how's things? You know since the last time I spoke to you and didn't have to hear about MY best friend through some kind of fucked up grapevine." Clarke sighed, pulling off her coat and scarf when they entered the restaurant and sat down as far from the door as possible. Winter always made things with Raven's knee even worse.
"I've been okay. I've been writing again, a decent amount. Two hundred k plus words. And I called to order dinner yesterday instead of ordering online and having them leave it at the door without me ever having to see another human being. I'm... Fine." Raven nodded, obviously at least partially skeptical. She was allowed that. She had seen Clarke when she literally refused to get out of her bed, and she and Monty had to drag her to the bathroom and force her in the tub to get her to shower.
"That's good, Clarke. You know we worry about you. We kind of thought we'd have to just come to your place to give you your phone. You haven't been a fan of leaving it lately. Or talking to either of us often for that matter." Monty said. Exactly zero anger but mountains of disappointment and hurt in his tone. She frowned and reached across the table to take both their hands. Also something she hadn't done in a while. Touched another human being.
"I am sorry about how I've been. I haven't wanted to do any of the things I should, so I haven't. I didn't want to tell either of you that I was spending all my days and nights laying in my bed reading and writing fan fiction on my tablet instead of writing my book. Or that I was living off of take out and instant noodles." Raven snorted as if that was all already known information and Clarke frowned, picking at a stray string on her scarf.
"You eating better now at least?" Monty walked up to the counter to order for them, flirting with the guy spinning pizza dough in the air.
"Yes, Rave. I'm eating better. I found this ordering service online. So my groceries will come to my door every two weeks now." Raven frowned like the question was really geared towards Clarke's avoidance of grocery stores.
"That's good, Clarke. Even though it's not what it meant. So tell me about this newest book you've been all hush hush about." The blonde could admit she hadn't even dropped a single hint concerning her current novel during the rare times she spoke to her friends.
"It's about this colony ship that reaches one of the planets on it's list of potential home world's. And the potentials have had other ships dispatched to them for surveying and such like a hundred years before the colony ship is forced to start it's journey. When they get there, there's a distress Beacon on, but they can't get any readings from their sensors." Raven's eyebrow lifts, and Monty looks curious when he sits.
"Sensors, huh? Colony ships? And what, pray tell, is the science behind this?" Clarke shrugs, having not yet figured that out.
"Need both your help with that. I want it to be logical. I'd like there to be some classical hard Sci Fi in this book. Anyway, so this colony ship is generational. And very strict on supplies, space, and life support. So the rules are extreme and honestly insane." Monty looks a little more interested suddenly, and Clarke grins.
"Hard and soft Sci Fi, huh? Nice." The blonde nodded as their pizza was set on the table, the young man who made it smiling flirtingly at Monty.
"Just yell my name if I can get you anything else." He says with a charming smile. Raven chuckles.
"He would fucking love to, Miller." She laughs out. Their best friend and Nathan Miller, the son of the shops owner, eye fuck for a few seconds before the guy disappears.
"When did he get back in town?"
"Round a month ago. They've been flirting and eye fucking ever since. They should just get on with it, really." The dark haired mechanic bit into her first slice as she said this.
"Maybe I'll ask him out."
"You should. Monty. You two would be great together." Raven nodded, face marginally serious.
"Back to the story."
"Right. So, the laws. Each couple can only have one child. And they're all genetically modified to survive space. If you have more than one child, you get floated, and the child locked up."
"Whoa, there's spacing happening? Harsh." Clarke nodded, folding her next slice in half to eat.
"That's not even as bad as it gets. Any and every crime committed by someone over eighteen gets them floated." She said, pulling out her still warm phone to go through her pictures, pulling up the rough first drawing of the ship and the planet below she's done. She showed them both and they both inspected it carefully.
"Where's the grav generating ring? It rotates. Uses centrifugal force to replicate 1.0 g." Raven asked, face serious as she took the phone to inspect it more closely with Monty.
"I couldn't figure out where to put it. Or what I wanted it's usage to be outside of the gravity thing. Anyway, so the main character, her dad is head engineer and he figures out a problem with the co2 scrubber. So the ship will only have enough oxygen stored for just over a year. He wants to tell the whole ship. He tells his daughter and wife, and when the Chancellor finds out, he has him floated to keep it quiet, then locks up the daughter."
"Well shit this is dark. What happens to her?" The two scientists hand the phone back and Clarke runs a thumb over it's back as she slides it into her pocket.
"I have to tell you how the system works and some other stuff first, but I don't want to ruin it all for you. The important part is that when they can't figure out what's happening on this planet, they send the one hundred child 'criminals' to the ground instead, because they're expendable. The rest, you can read. I'm actually working on the second book now. The first will hit shelves in the next couple of months. But I'll send the book to your phones. You'll both like it, I think. I made characters after you."
"You did not. What're they like? What're their names? Are they BAMFs?" Clarke giggled, causing smiles to spring up on her friend's faces.
"Monty's character's name is intelligent, and sweet, and brave adorable. Also a computer genius. Rave, your character is Raelyn Rivera. Complete BAMF, take no bullshit attitude, rocket scientist/mechanic. Her story is pretty tragic. But she's unfailingly strong and saves everyone's lives too many times to count. She also likes to make things go boom using hydrazine."
"Hydrazine bombs? Is she crazy?" Monty asked, face surprised.
"In all the best ways? Maybe. She's amazing. Both of them are. Just like their real life counterparts." Clarke said softly, stacking her empty plate with the other two on the empty pie pan.
"We agree. We're awesome. Anyway, we've gotta head back to the lab. Too much work to do to hang around like all these wayward grad students. You wanna cook dinner Sunday night? We could find something awesome to watch on the Sci Fi section of Netflix and make it a night." Raven asked, standing and pulling her coat back on. Clarke did the same.
"Yeah. Sounds fun. I'll make steaks or something."
"Steaks, yes. And some kind of potatoes. With cheese. We'll bring beer." Monty said as they all left the shop and shivered in the cold. Clarke stepped close, pulling both of them into a hug at once
"Love you both. Thank you... Um, yeah, I'll see you Sunday."
It was Wednesday morning, and though she was kind of kind of craving something like bolognese for dinner, going out wasn't in her plan. So she'd decided to make it instead. She went through the stages to open her phone, frowning as she wondered what the name of the ask program was. She'd spoken to it before, every time she accessed her phone and now, with it's customary greeting.
"Um, I'm sorry, do you have a name?" She asked, nervous for some reason. It was just a phone.
"My name is Anya, how can I help you?" That husky, smooth voice said.
"Um... I just need a recipe. For bolognese. And maybe pasta."
"Right. Bolognese and maybe pasta. Want to clarify a bit? I literally have a million plus references for bolognese." Clarke frowned. Her tone was easy, friendly, and familiar. Like the two of them were friends instead of a recluse and a piece of smartphone software.
"Oh, right. I'm sorry. Um, classical, I guess. I have ground brisket." In some ways, talking to to Anya felt like that first awkward conversation with someone new.
"Gotcha. Here are a few of the best results, which sounds good to you, Clarke?" Suddenly, those three recipes were not only showing on her phone but on the medium sized TV where she was standing, in the kitchen. She walked over, examining all three until she'd chosen one that looked and sounded better to her.
"This one here. Can you keep the recipe up here on the tv if I switch to spotify?" She asked, going over to the fridge to pull out all of her ingredients.
"I definitely can. What would you like to play on Spotify?" Clarke stopped for a moment to consider how she felt.
"Can you shuffle play Halsey's Badlands, but start on Haunting?" There was a quiet sort of hum from the woman, who Clarke had to remind herself was not real.
"Of course I can. Good choice. Until later, Clarke." She sighed, confusing etched over every inch of her face. A phone program could like music? And joke, and be snarky and friendly? It was something she'd have to think about later.
Clarke had been trying to roll out her pasta for the last ten minutes. And this was the second batch. She huffed when the dough split, we'll and truly frustrated. She tried it again, pushing to hard down on the too dry dough only to overextended herself and slide forward onto the counter, dipping her entire upper half into the dough and the flour surrounded her. Suddenly there was a laugh and she froze, looking around her room for a second. Then she looked over at her phone,where the sound was coming from.
"It's just me. But seriously, Clarke. That was hilarious." Clarke pouted, pulling her messy blouse over her head and tossing it aside. There was a quiet coughing gasp and then silence.
"It wasn't funny. You're my phone! You're supposed to help me, or something!" She snapped. She frowned once she'd calmed a bit. She hadn't meant to say much of that.
"Yes, you're right, sorry. Um, just put little drops of water into the dough until it comes back together. And you should check on your sauce." Clarke nodded as if she was actually speaking to a person. Which Anya seemed more and more like. They'd only talked very little in the last few hours, and only about the food Clarke was making and music. Both of which Anya knew a hell of a lot about. She checked on her sauce, stirring the pot and feeling her hunger grow at it's aroma, then went back to her mess of dough.
In ten minutes, her wide, flat noodles were cut and set to the side as she cleaned the counter top. Her sauce would be done in an hour, then she could cook her noodles quickly and eat.
"Would you like me to invite Raven to dinner? Monty has a date with Miller, but she is free." Clarke turned to her phone, frowning.
"How do you know that?"
"I'm the only reason those two aren't late to every appointment they have." Her brain conjured up an image of a beautiful woman shrugging and she had to tell herself that Anya was essentially a computer. A virtual intelligence. That all of her behavior was programmed by Monty and Raven.
"I think I would rather eat alone. I... " Need some time to think, she didn't say. Seeing Raven would only lead to her asking a million and one questions about the program that apparently didn't just exist in her phone.
"Are you okay? I understand that you may just want time alone. You're comfortable with that, and I get that you've been taking steps to leave that comfort zone. Like you've been spending more time with Raven and Monty lately, not to even mention me being here now. So if you need to not have a stranger, even your phone all in your quiet space right now, I understand. I'll go dark, but I'll be here if you need me, Clarke." Was said quietly, the program's voice having lost all of that rather vibrant personality she'd come to recognize and even like.
"Anya, wait!" Came out of her mouth before she could hold her tongue.
"Yes?" It was nearly a whisper, quiet and cold. A frown once more twisted her lips. She sighed. Some part of her couldn't help but be a little annoyed at her two best friends for essentially stealthily pushing another person into her life, V. I. or not. And yet she'd come to sort of like Anya, no matter her confusion about what she was or was capable of.
"Thank you." There was a soft, rasping, chuckle. Dry and confusing.
"You are of course welcome, Clarke. It's my job, right? Good night." There was a complete silence then, and Clarke picked up her phone from the counter, slipping it into her pocket with a pouting frown.
"How are you the best cook of the three of us? It makes no sense. I mean, shit, Clarke. You barely want to buy groceries. Let alone cook. But thank God you did. I'm dying of potato ecstasy right now."
"Did you drug these? They're so good." Monty exclaimed, shoveling spoonful after spoonful of baked cheesy potatoes into his mouth. Clarke herself cut into her steak, eating silently. Neither of her friends had even touched theirs. The second they sat down and saw potatoes they forgot about the expensive medium rare ribeye on their plates. Clarke could admit the potatoes were amazing, but she preferred to save the best for last.
"It's just potatoes baked in a cheesy cream sauce, you two. Calm yourselves."
"We can't. This might be the best thing we ever eat." Raven mentioned, humming quietly when she finally cut into her steak.
"There's cake... " She said quietly. Cake which she had left the house to buy. She was proud of herself for getting better, and she hoped they would be too.
"What kind of cake? Is there chocolate involved?" The mechanic asked, finally setting her fork and knife on her empty plate.
"Yes. There's chocolate mousse, and ganash, and white chocolate-"
"Bring us this cake you made, please." Clarke nodded, walking over to the fridge to pull out the tray the cake sat on, then grabbing plates and forks before she returned.
"Holy shit, you made that?"
"I actually went and bought it. There's this chocolatier downtown." This earned shocked gasps and she cut thin slices and laid them onto plates. The 'cake' and that should barely be applied to this desert, was rich, and dense, and required small servings to enjoy. She watched as they started eating, their wide eyes flicking up to hers after the first bite.
"First of all, you went downtown? Second, holy shit. This. I need more of this in my life." A small, half smile curved Clarke's lips and she nodded, standing from the table to pop a k cup in her coffee machine.
"Yes, I went downtown. I do that sometimes for work. You know that. And it wasn't... I mean the place opens near noon and stays open late so the area was really crowded... But I was okay. No one tried to talk to me but the shop owner." She admitted, bringing her cup to her lips as she watched them finish their cake and serve themselves once more.
"What matters is that you went out at all, Clarke. We're proud of you. You're making progress, you're trying. Despite what Rae may say, we don't expect you to go hang out at a bar with us or something. I know that was never really your thing." He was right, but having a couple of drinks with friends sounded good. The problem was the other people in the bar, plus the expected inclusion of Jasper and his girlfriend Maya. She liked them both, Maya especially. And had known Jasper since freshman year of college, but having something interesting to say was hard, and feeling excluded when everyone was talking and she felt too anxious and nervous to do so sucked. Still. Baby steps. And she could always come home.
"Are you going out tonight?" Monty nods hesitantly, and Raven eyes her, obviously curious about why she'd even show any interest.
"I want to go." She says, face serious and brooking no arguments. Their reactions are one part surprised and one part reluctant, but they stay silent.
"I'm serious. I want to have some beers, and hang out with you two. Maybe see Jasper and Maya, too."
"Clarke..." Monty says, sighing and pushing his plate away.
"Do you just not want me to come? Like, I know I'm boring and I obviously have problems taking part in conversations... But I'm getting better. And going to a bar, even if only for an hour seems like a good step to take." She says, voice shaky and uncertain, feeling suddenly inferior.
"Griff, calm down. We just don't think it'll be good for you to go, okay. And you may be a little boring, but only like... Hot librarian boring." Raven said, standing from the table to lean against the kitchen island.
"Why? Is it a holiday and I didn't notice?"
"No, Clarke. It's because Octavia tends bar at the place we're going to. Apparently Bellamy goes by there sometimes. We can't let him set you back again. Not when you're making such good progress." Monty said seriously. And Clarke suddenly understood their reluctance.
"Oh."
"Yeah, we know. So with that in mind, how about you stop by Monty's place next Friday? Miller will make pizza, we'll grab a bunch of beer, invite Jaz and Maya. Make it a night? We can play some kind of table top game or something. Not sure we have one for six people, but we'll figure it out." Raven proposed, and Clarke nodded. That sounded good. And safer for her psyche.
"Okay. That... Um that sounds good. I'll bring the IPA."
"Cool. I'll grab something sour. Anyway, so we got your book. It's stupid good. Rae showed up to the lab two hours late on Friday because she was up all night reading." Raven nodded, shrugging.
"I had to finish that whole thing with Raelyn falling to earth in the pod. Shit was crazy. William is a fucking asshole by the way. He's definitely Bellamy." Monty looked at the mechanic then at Clarke brows high above his eyes.
"Wait, really?"
"Uh, yeah. How did you not catch that? Little sister, Roman name? My sister, my responsibility?" Monty, slapped his hand onto his face, nodding.
"Shit, yeah. Should have noticed. Valentina is sort of like O. Anyway, we should go, Clarke. We're supposed to meet at the bar in thirty." He stood, grabbing all their plates and stacking them in the sink.
"Okay. Half the cake and all the leftover potatoes are yours." Raven's excited face as she pulled out Tupperware containers to package the food up caused a quiet chuckle to fall from Clarke's lips.
"We love you so much for the food. Thanks Griff." Monty hugged her and she sighed into the comfortable, familiar, embrace, patting his back. When he pulled back, Raven was done with the food, so they hugged too.
"I'll talk to you two tomorrow. Be safe on your way home." They nodded, tossed out another set of goodbyes, then left. Clarke sighed quietly while she locked the door, sighing with her head leaned against it.
"Alone again." Despite her progress, this was still the situation in which she was most comfortable. Which was why she had been using her phone manually. And hadn't spoken to Anya in the four days it'd been since Wednesday evening. Even that simple and expected 'Welcome, Clarke' was gone. It was just a phone now. Regardless of how advanced it was.
Honestly she felt bad for shutting the apparently highly advanced VI out. She knew Anya was perhaps on Raven and Monty's phones too, no to mention the time they spent programming her. But, still.
Sighing as she crossed to her refrigerator, Clarke opened the left door, inspecting the nearly thirty or so bottles and cans of beer in it. Seeing as she wasn't a big fan of hard liquor, and wine had never impressed her, craft beer was her go to. But what to drink...
After all the rich meat and twice as rich cheesy potatoes, something hoppy was in order. Which she loved. Which beer, though?
"Anya?" She said quietly, her eyes tracing over a few bottles she was interested in. When, after a few seconds, the VI didn't answer, she wondered if she'd have to do something in the settings to access the program again.
"Yes, Clarke? How can I help you?" Clarke looked down at the phone in her hand, sighing. That cold, dry, tone was still present. None of the personality she'd come to expect and appreciate was present.
"I'm sorry if you were... Busy? Or something? I just, I thought you could help me decide which beer to have." There was silence for a few moments, then a near inaudible sigh before Anya spoke again.
"Go with the Trillium cutting tiles IPA. Apparently it's a religious experience. Anything else you need?" Clarke frowned as she pulled the can from the fridge, setting it on her island when she walked over, then grabbing herself a glass.
"Um, no. Thank you. That's all I need." She set her nose to the glass once she'd poured, eyebrows raising. Wow was it tropical. And orangey.
"Alright, then I'm going dark. Goodnight." Anya said, silence filling the house again. Clarke frowned, picking up her phone again to speak at it though she knew she didn't need to.
"Can, um... Unless you have something else you need to do, can you not?"
"Sure." It was quiet then silent and the blonde frowned at the phone at her phone at the curt tone. Had she done something to make Anya angry with her? Could she even be angry? Did her programming include these responses?
"Anya, I think we need to talk. I feel like you're mad at me, but I didn't even know you could be angry, but-"
"Why? Because I'm just your stupid phone? Why do you care, anyway? I'll still do my job, and you can be alone like you want." There was a sigh and then all was quiet again. Clarke frowned. She really was mad at her.
"Anya, I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings. Raven and Monty haven't told me anything about what or who you are. I really did think you were just my phone's assist program. Like siri. A VI. I didn't know you had feelings."
"Yeah, well I do have feelings. And you did hurt them. And really? I'm not some simple VI. Did they really tell you nothing about me?" Clarke shrugged. They hadn't even mentioned her. She definitely would have been a lot more sensitive.
"No. I wouldn't have said what I did otherwise. It would never be my intention to hurt you. I really am sorry."
"It's fine, seeing as they told you nothing. Look, nevermind. It's better that they explain things. Just know I'm not just a phone program and we'll be okay. Goodnight." Anya's tone was still noticeably cold and curt, but it was easier to recognize that it was due to the fact that Clarke's words had hurt her.
"Goodnight, Anya."
"Look, Anya, we're sorry, okay. We didn't not tell her on purpose. We just forgot." Monty said, voice apologetic.
"Oh... No, Mon, you just forgot. Raven on the other hand..."
"For fucks sake, that was one time! Jesus. What's your issue? We weren't trying to fuck with you and Clarke. Get over it." Raven rolled her eyes from her station, where she was bent over a mechanical arm, tinkering with it's complicated servos.
"We can't talk about this anymore anyway, Clarke is here. And all three of us know it won't be me who will have trouble getting over it. That's my issue, Raven." The engineer frowned, turning in her chair to frown at the holographic projection that was pacing on the emitter pad next to Monty's desk.
"You aren't the only one of us that cares about her and her emotional state, Anya. I've known and loved Clarke like a sister since we were in elementary school. The only way this will be an issue is if you act like just as much as a bitch with her as you are with me right now. So tone it down. I don't need your self-induced drama. I've got plenty of my own." Anya curled her hands into fists, her desire to jump over the pile of tech on the floor between them to throw a punch at Raven's too beautiful face overwhelming.
"Fuck you." She hissed out before she switched off the emitter remotely and went quiet. Clarke walking into the lab to see her sort of physically standing there would not help their situation. Something Raven didn't seem to care about. She wasn't exactly sure why the genius engineer had been treating her as if she was some stranger who's opinion mattered less than nothing to her lately... But she really had, and Anya wasn't okay with that affecting Clarke and her mental health.
Nevermind how it affected her. How hurt she was by it all, how she felt she was losing her old self piece by piece, Raven's unconcerned treatment only exascerbating that feeling.
"Hi, guys! I brought dinner!" The blonde said as she opened the door to the lab and pulled off her coat and hung it on the rack.
"You're the best. I swear we'd die if you didn't feed us! What goodies has thou brought forth today?" Monty asked, standing from his crowded but organized desk to hug the blonde as she came down the steps.
"Chowder and fresh bread. I felt like cooking today in celebration of all the writing I got done. How's your day been? I haven't seen you since Sunday. Have you been eating okay?" Monty pointed to himself, then to Raven as Clarke handed him a bowl and a slice of the sourdough she'd bought.
"I have. This one not so much." Clarke sat on the nearest free rolling stool, digging into her own bowl once she was steady.
"I've been busy working. And sleeping in the lab all week. Miller brings me pizza, though." She shrugged, already digging into her larger portion.
"Raven..."
"I know, yeah, fine. I'll eat better."
"And?"
"And go to your place if I don't want to drive all the way home. Thanks for dinner, Griff. Still down to hang out at Green's tomorrow night?" Clarke smiled, looking more sure than either were used to as she nodded.
"Yes. I'm actually... I think I'm excited to just hang out with friends again after so long." Raven looks at her, brow raised above a dark eye, but nods.
"So what's this about all the writing you got done, my beautiful friend? More for The 100 novel? I've already finished what you sent us." Monty asked as they all started to eat, Clarke curling up on the couch.
"Actually, I spoke to my publisher a few days ago and pitched an idea I was really excited about and they gave me the go ahead. So I started work on it all and I think it's coming together even better than I thought it would. Would you like to see my first draft?" She reached into her bag, pulling out two sketch books and handing them over to her friends. Monty opened his first, immediately grinning at the first page that showed Clarke's character drawing pictures off the forest on the floor of her cell with charcoal.
"A graphic novel? Awesome, Clarke! And damn is it well drawn. Oh, you added the grav gen ring too. So you decided on it's function?" Clarke nodded, frowning over at Raven, who had yet to pick up the book.
"What's wrong?" Raven finally lifted her noticeably sadeyes from her bowl and shrugged. She said nothing, but Clarke knew something was up. She'd barely spoken, and deflected the conversation from herself as soon as possible earlier.
"Nothin's wrong. I'll check it out when I finish eating." Clarke looked over at Monty, now officially concerned. He shrugged as if he didn't know what the issue was either.
"Raven, I need you to tell me what I did wrong, please. You're worrying me. And if... If I did something to make you angry with me that's fine, you're obviously entitled to your feelings... But I won't know how to fix it if you don't tell me what I did wrong. Is this -" Monty set his book and empty bowl aside, climbing onto the couch and pulling Clarke into him.
"No. You did nothing wrong, Clarke. You've been amazing. Writing more, leaving your place more and even cooking for us. There's nothing you've done that deserves the way she's acting, and I won't let you put it on yourself, sweetheart." Clarke shrugged, not exactly believing him. After all, Raven still hadn't said anything, and was just sitting there with her face in her hands, breathing deeper than was usual.
"But what if she's mad because I hurt Anya's feelings or something... I don't know. Or maybe you want for Raelyn to have a bigger part in the book?" She was grasping at straws, hoping it was one of these pettier issues and not something about herself that Raven suddenly couldn't stand. There were tears falling from her eyes, and Monty had just started to wipe them away when something surprising happened.
"This is exactly what I was talking about! Do you see what this is doing to her, Raven? Fix. It." Anya yelled from the middle of the room, not standing on the photo-emitter, the one they knew worked. No, she was using the prototype holo emitter. The one Monty and Raven weren't sure would work until now. It allowed her to walk around the entire lab.
And not that he'd told Raven, due to the way she'd been acting since their trip to the bar half a week ago. But he'd been putting some time into an old idea. A star trek inspired mobile emitter that would allow Anya to not only look but feel human. Of course their were emitters in their phones, but they were short range and no where near as powerful as those in the labs. That and she really was just a hologram right now. Hard light was the next step.
"Anya?" Clarke asked, clearly surprised, and her eyes wide as she appraised the gorgeous woman in front of her.
"Clarke, hi. I'm sorry for yelling. I know you don't like it when people yell around you." Raven scoffed, chuckling as she lifted her head from her hands and wiped her tears away. Clarke frowned at her, now pretty extremely worried about her best friend.
Of course it was a bit strange that Anya was standing in front of her, apparently no longer angry with her. Which was good, really. Before she'd hurt her feelings, talking to Anya about food and music had felt... It was good. Talking to someone while she moved around her kitchen comfortably.
"You're an AI." She said succinctly, everything adding up in her head. Anya frowned, but nodded.
"Yes, Clarke."
"Oh. Well okay. I really am sorry about hurting your feelings. I really didn't know." Anya just shrugged while Monty felt Clarke lean further into him, apparently more comfortable with the situation than he would have thought.
"It's fine, Clarke. I know it wasn't your fault. These two just forgot to tell you. I know you would never hurt me or anyone on purpose, so we're good. Now that's settled, Raven what's going on? I don't know why you've been treating me like shit, or why you would let whatever sudden problem you have with me affect Clarke like this. Regardless, whatever your malfunction is, let's hear it." Raven seemed to fold in on herself, those sobs Anya was sure she was masking as derisive scoff's shaking her frame. Clarke and Monty pulled her into their arms, the blonde carefully lifting her braced leg up onto the couch.
"It's...Abby. It's your mom, Clarke." The blonde pulled away, standing from the couch with a conflicted expression. Anya knew that She and her mother Abigail Griffin didn't talk. They hadn't since the truth about how her father had died came out and the three's other best friend Well's Jaha died.
"Is she dead?" She asked, clearly unsure about how to feel if that was the case. She didn't want her mother dead, but she didn't want anything to do with her, and a miniscule part of her felt that it was the universe dishing out Karma.
"Dying. She's got cancer, Clarke. She didn't want you to know. Didn't want you to show up just because she's dying. Didn't want to emotionally manipulate you that way."
"Right." Monty said with a scoff, clearly just as pissed at Abby as Clarke was.
"As if emotionally manipulating Clarke isn't her specialty." Anya snarked, lips twisted into a scowl.
"You stay out of this! You don't know anything Monty or I didn't tell you or program about our lives, and you fucking inputting recycled information? I don't fucking need that. My mother... The woman who fucking raised me is dying!" Raven yelled, turning away from where Anya was standing to curl back into Monty's chest. He frowned sympathetically at her, hoping she realized that Rae wasn't actually angry with her, just hurting in general.
Abby Griffin really had raised her. The Griffin's had been her only real family, and though she'd felt just as devastated and betrayed as they had been when they finally found out it was Abby that had caused Jake's death, she'd been unwilling to completely abandon the only other parent she had.
"Alright. Going dark." She said, clearly hurt from what Monty and Raven could hear from her tone as she disappeared.
/
When Clarke finally walked back into her apartment that night it was nearing eleven at night. She hung her coat and scarf up and pulled off the rest of her now unnecessary layers, immediately walking down the hall and into her bedroom and climbing into her bed. Pulling her phone from her pocket, she lay it on the pillow in front of her.
"Anya?" She asked quietly, hoping Raven's grief filled outbursts hadn't caused the AI to truly shut herself off if that was possible.
"Yes, Clarke?" The blonde sighed. She was definitely hurt, but she was here, and Clarke would do her best to heal the damage Raven had done.
"Are you okay? I apologize for the way Rae acted. She's not herself right now and in situations like this, I've learned that it's best to ignore her outbursts. It isn't healthy, but this has always been the way she copes. I'm just sorry she lashed out at you. You don't deserve that, you've done nothing wrong, Anya."
"If you say so. Are you okay with me using the phone's emitter to sit in front of you? I feel more comfortable talking that way." Clarke nodded, sitting up herself. Of course she was exhausted, but Anya needed to talk, needed to understand that she'd done nothing wrong, had truly only been trying to protect her. Within a few short seconds, Anya was sitting with her legs crossed in front of her, clearly sad and more importantly hurt.
"I do say so by the way. I don't know you well enough to know if you're the type of person who will ignore me when I tell you you really haven't done anything wrong and that this isn't your fault again, and then keep blaming yourself for it later; but it really isn't your fault, Anya." The dirty blonde shrugged, wiping her arm over her wet eyes and turning her head away.
It just all felt so wrong. She thought she'd gotten used to this. To being nothing but this accumulation of her memories and feelings, her fears and the hopes that mattered so little now. A shadow of the woman she used to be. She was positive she had. But when Raven acted like this? Treated her like this? It stirred up all the loss again. It was strange to grieve for your own death. And then there were things like what Raven said today about her only knowing what they'd told her, what they'd programmed? As if she'd never been human at all? Hadn't known Jake, Abby, and Jaha herself? That was the worst of it.
"I know. Just hurts. We were friends you know? I thought we still were, but she just doesn't treat me the same." Clarke's eyes are as kind and understanding as she's come to understand they would be when she first stared into them, and the blonde reached a hand forward as if to touch her own, pulling it back a second later when she realized that Anya was probably just a projection.
"You were a physical human; H… how is that even possible?" Her furrowed brows and pouty frown were enough to make Anya chuckle quietly, letting go of a little of that pain. More comes when she thinks of Lexa, completely unsure if she's alive or dead; her brilliant, beautiful, mind saved like hers was or lost to the world.
"Before I died, I was working on a project. A way to scan the human brain and record it to a database. An entire mind, an entire person; reduced to millions of lines of code. I scanned my own and sent it to Raven and Monty for our first alpha test. From what they tell me my lab was attacked right after that. I know I died, but I don't know about my best friend, or if anyone else survived. We had all taken the scans but I don't know what happened to the files or if they were stolen."
"Shit, I'm so… god. That must be – I can't even imagine how I would cope in your shoes. The thought of that happening to people I care about is fucking horrifying. Not knowing if they were still corporeal or only their minds were left? I can't believe I've been using you; and as a stupid phone of all things? You're not some thing of theirs they can just use. You aren't a machine, or even an AI. No matter what format you take you're still a human being, Anya. Still just a woman who's hurting. In fact it's really fucking wrong for Raven and Monty to do what they've done. I mean you were working together, you must be absolutely brilliant. Why not just work with them on projects? Even if you can't do things physically for now you can interface with tech right? What's to stop you from contributing to the lab like part of a think tank or something?"
And there were the tears again. Clearly, Clarke was a special woman. Her empathy seemed to reach heights Anya had never really seen in a person. For her to think Anya was still a human being, still a woman; that meant so much. And here she was recognizing that Anya was still very much an engineer, a techno-neurologist. Clarke thought she had worth, that she should be welcomed in the lab as another scientist.
She had no words. Where had this woman come from? Why couldn't she have been in her life when she'd first woken up in that stupid computer they liked to keep her in.
"You… You're right. I am still a person. I am still me. I deserve to work in the lab, and if they don't want to realize all that, don't want me there, then I don't need them." Clarke grinned wide, nodded her head and raising her hand for a high five. Anya moved her hand up, stopping it just about where she would've if she had a body.
"Awesome!"
"You're awesome." Anya answered with a relieved chuckle. She hadn't felt so understood; so cared for, since she'd last spoken with Lexa and Indra. She missed the hell out of them, and couldn't help but feel like they'd like Clarke too; even if begrudgingly on Indra's part.
"Why thank you, mon ami. Now that we've had our talk how do you feel about hanging out with me for awhile? We could watch a movie or something. Or find a show to binge on Netflix."
"You want to hang out with me?" Clarke's answering chuckle was equal parts sweet melody and gorgeous display, and though she could keep it from showing in her avatar, she felt as if she was blushing.
"Yep. It's why I asked."
"I'd love to. Go ahead and get yourself some popcorn, maybe a beer. I'll get Netflix ready." The TV turned on, and within seconds Netflix was on the Screen. Clarke frowned in thought, her gears turning.
"Okay wait I just a sec. You can interface with any machine you can connect to right? Through wifi networks or direct connection?"
"Yes… But I'm not robbing an atm for you Clarke. You're rich enough already."
"What? No! I was thinking about this machine I read about that can analyze flavors and textures and I thought if I could plug the phone in you could, you know… sort of have one more part of your humanity back. I mean I know you don't get hungry or anything but id be totally geeked about trying to recreate some of your favorite food memories for you. Would that be something you'd like? Her smile was genuinely hopeful. Like Clarke just really wanted to do something like this for her.
"I would love that. My mother's Nepali but my father is half Filipino and he used to make this deep fried pork belly dish called Lechon Kawali. It's so, so crunchy on the outside; But the inside is fatty, tender, and succulent. You peel off the top and it's like the best chicharron you've ever had.
"Well damn if that doesn't sound delicious. I'm not sure how much the machine costs but it doesn't matter. I'll get one here asap. Besides, you've been helping me out, it's time I helped you. It's what friends are for."
"Friends…
"I'm go pop that popcorn, got a beer suggestion for me? You were spot on last time."
"Beer advocate was spot on, not me. Try the Mikkeller beer. Big Hazy? You'll like it."
"I think I'm just going to keep thinking of you as my friend, the beer oracle. Pick whatever you like, I'll be back in a couple."
She watched her go, sighing. Clark was so caring, and thoughtful, and sweet. With all of the insanity, Anya hasn't even realized how much she needed that. Having Clarke as a friend felt like a few brave steps forward when she'd been so stagnant before. She wanted this, she realized. This friendship with a person who could actually see her. With a happy sigh, Anya shifted to lay back on the 'surface' she laid upon, wishing she could rearrange the pillows so she could almost feel as if Clarke was curled up onto her shoulder.
When her friend came back, she set her glass aside and did just that, moving the pillows around until they were half in her projection, ready to serve as her left side.
"This cool? We can sort of cuddle, kind of."
"It's perfect, Clarke. Now come on, let's pick a show." Anya said with a satisfied smile, motioning towards the tv.
"Hmm… Oh, have you seen Continuum? It's honestly really great." She selected the show from her list so Anya could read the summary.
"I'm here for whatever you want to show me . And Sci Fi is my go to. Just as long as there's no AI stuff?" Just the idea made her uneasy after everything.
"No AI stuff, sweetheart; I promise." Clarke reached as if to take her hand, lasting her hand in the shoulder pillow instead.
"Thank you." Clarke rubbed the pillow, nodding and focusing understanding blue eyes on hers.
"Always."
They started the show then, and Clarke took a few healthy sips of her beer before she lay down, cuddling right into the pillows with a contented sigh.
Anya hadn't felt this close to someone in so long, she hardly knew what to do with herself. And here Clarke was, putting herself outside of her comfort zone to help Anya feel so much closer to who she used to be. She felt so much alive and human with her. Like she was worthy of this new, unexpected, friendship.
Tomorrow, she'd lay down the law with Monty and Raven. Either they treated her like the human being she was or she'd be done.
She was Anya Forrester, she deserved the same consideration and respect of anyone else, and she was no one's artificial intelligence.