"You mind if go over there and hustle these idiots?" you asked Dean, who was currently sitting next to you in the booth at some bar.
A smile played around Dean's lips and he shook his head. "No, go on, just try to not get them as angry as the last muttonheads you played."
You cringed thinking about the incident. "I'll try," you said and got up, walking over to your victim.
Truth to be told, while you didn't mind making some money, there was another reason for why you left Dean's side. As soon as you two entered the bar, ten minutes ago, basically all women were eyeing Dean up and down. Not that you blamed them, you did the same almost all day long, but a particular busty woman wouldn't stop starring at him. She was seated right behind Dean, so you saw her pulling down her cleavage and checking her making up, the tell-tale signs that she planned on approaching him.
Again, you couldn't blame her, but you hated situation like this. Women like her would completely ignore you while throwing themselves at Dean. And Dean? He would gladly let them, saying you were just a friend or sometimes, even worse, his little sister, breaking your heart each time a little more.
Walking away wasn't making it any better, you knew that, but at least you didn't have to hear these painful remarks. It was worse enough that you would hear them all night, knowing he will never do these things to you, but you didn't have to hear him saying it out loud.
The game went pretty well, and to your surprise, the men you were playing with were great company. You actually enjoyed yourself. But of course, being the masochistic idiot you are, you looked over your shoulder to see what Dean was doing, or whom.
To your surprise he was still sitting alone in the booth. He hold a beer-bottle between his hands and starred at it, with a forlorn expression. You peeked over to the woman you thought was about to make a move on Dean. She sat in her booth, arms crossed and sending you death-glares. You quickly turned back around to the pool-table. What the hell was going on?
You finished the game, took the 100$, thanked the guys and made your way over to Dean. You slipped back into the booth and showed him proudly the cash you made. "And they're not angry."
Dean looked at you with a small smile that didn't reached his eyes. "That's my girl."
You put the money in your jeans pocket and rested your arms on the table. "Dean, what's going on?"
"Nothing, princess," he said as spiritless as he looked.
You huffed. "So, you just moping around for fun? You even turned down Misses My-Cleavage-is-about-to-throw-my-tits-in-your-face."
He chuckled at your cheap witticism, but the chuckle soon turned into a deep sigh. He run his hand over his face and looked at you. He opened his mouth but closed it again, shaking his head and starring at his bottle again.
At this point you were really worried about him. Usually he tells you everything. "Dean?"
"I'm done with this," he muttered.
"You're done with what?" you asked puzzled at his statement.
"Sleeping around," he explained and took another sip.
"Oh," was everything you said. You honestly didn't know how to take this. On the one side you were more than happy, on the other side you were confused and worried. It was no secret that Dean loved women and sex, so why would he quit it.
"And… why?" you asked, hoping to sounded casual and not like it was the best news of all time.
"Because I don't want them. There's someone… and I tried to get over them by sleeping with these woman, but it never worked."
His words were like knifes, stabbing and twisting your heart until it was unrecognizable. You wanted to ask who, but all air has left your lungs, and in your shock, you forgot how to breath. You felt the bile rising and excused yourself.
You heard Dean shouting your name, but you didn't stop until you reached the bathroom. You dashed into on of the stalls and threw the door close. Your stomach has calmed down by now, but it still felt like it was being in knots.
You squeezed your eyes shut and took and shuddering breath, trying your best to suppress a sob. Why, just why was this happening to you? Why did you have to fall for non other than Dean Winchester? And if it wasn't painfully enough to hear him sleeping with every woman he laid eyes on but you, he had to fall in love.
You wanted Dean to be happy, even if it wasn't with you, so ever since you had fallen for him, you told yourself that these woman were there for only one night. They might be sleeping with him, and yes it hurt, but they would never know him like you did. The thought was comforting you at least somewhat. It made it easier to act like nothing was bothering you the next morning, when the barfly of the night was gone, and you had Dean all to yourself again.
But what were you supposed to do now? As much as you wanted to see him happy, you couldn't pretend that this wasn't tearing you apart.
You wiped away the tears that escaped. You couldn't do this. This was simply to much. Maybe it was time to stop chasing dreams and time to start living. Maybe it was time to leave.
It took you a couple of minutes to calm down enough to face Dean again. By then the plan was set, that you would leave the Winchesters soon. The thought of leaving the two men you considered family hurt, but it was for the best for everyone involved. In the next couple of days you'd tell them that you needed some time to yourself, pack your bag and leave. They were going to hate you once they've found you that you had no intention of returning, but you would hate yourself even more if you'd stay.
You checked yourself in the mirror one last time before you left the bathroom. Dean was nowhere to be seen and your heart sank. He had probably realized how upset you were, after all, you could read each other like an open book, and was pissed that his best friend was so troubled that he's in love.
Your heart was beating wildly as you made your way to the Impala, where Dean was waiting. His fists were firmly gripping the steering wheel and his jaw was clenched. He'd probably gonna ask you what that was all about, and you had no idea how you were going to explain yourself. You definitely couldn't tell him the truth, that's fore sure.
By the time you entered the car, you felt sick.
Dean didn't even look at you, neither when you entered nor when he started the car and left the parking lot. You simply stayed quiet and looked out of the window, trying to ignore the thick tension and the tears that were burning in your eyes.
Halfway through the ride you heard him sigh, but didn't turn around to look at him.
And here comes the sorry-but-you're-like-my-little-sister-talk, you thought bitterly.
"Look, let's just forget that ever happened, okay?" Dean's rough voice filled the car.
"I think it's a little bit too late for that." Your voice sounded as defeated as you felt.
"Y/N…Fuck!" The sound of a fist crashing down on the steering wheel made you jump and for the first time since you entered the car you looked at him.
He let out a humorless chuckle. "I knew Sam was wrong. As if someone as perfect as you could love someone as broken as me."
"Hold on, what?" you said flabbergasted.
"Y/N, you're the best damn thing that ever happened in my life. You mean so much much too me and I can't lose you. I promise you I'll never bring it up again, but please tell me it won't change anything between us. Please." He was searching for any sign that he hadn't messed up completely.
"What- no. Who- but you said-," your head was swimming. "You were talking about me?" Your brain finally caught up. "You're in love with me?"
It was Dean turn to look confused by the exchange. "I thought that's why you were so upset?"
Relief and happiness flooded your body and a snicker bubbled in your chest. "Oh God, I'm so stupid."
"Y/N?"
You slid over to him, grabbed his face and kissed him. You felt the car slowing and coming to a halt. When you broke the kiss, Dean didn't look any less confused, but you were now smiling like an idiot.
"I was upset because I thought you felt for another woman," you explained. "I've loved you for so long Dean. It was hard enough to see you hooking up with all these barflies, but thinking you were in love-"
"These women never meant anything," he said and leaned his forehead against yours. "Since the day you entered my life, it's been you. I'm sorry I hurt you so much, princess, if I'd known…"
"You couldn't have."
"Let me make it up to you anyway?"
"You can start by kissing me again," you snickered. Dean didn't need to be told twice. His lips captured yours in a passionate kiss. "And that's only the beginning," he said and winked.