Miyu: Hello all, thank you for actually clicking on this story. I must apologize in advance, for you see, I don't normally write these kinds of things. No, nothing like this, and for that I am sorry, because I have even offended myself in writing this. Yet, I do have a good explanation. One of my dear friends, Luke, (who is a big Harry Potter fan as well) said to me one day (as I was saying how much I liked) the marauder era), "They don't DO anything though. They go around angst-ing, and that's it! They don't have a Dark Lord to defeat like Harry." So, I promised him that I'd write him a story where the DO something. This is what came out. (How could I possibly NOT write a humor fic?") Anyway, enjoy, and if something offends you, pisses you off, or in anyway irritates you, let me know. I love those kinds of things; they make me laugh. (Flames are accepted, and are used to light the fires of romance between characters) Since this is for Luke, I think I'll get him to do the disclaimer.

Luke: Hey…She doesn't own HP, nor anything else referenced in below story. She owns the plot, what little there is of it, herself, and the 25 bucks in her wallet. Warning, slight…(well, maybe not slight, but not that much…) anyway, slight slash. Don't like, read anyway. It's good for the soul.

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It was one of those days. The days were the Marauders were out Marauding (for that is of utmost importance), winged dragons were flying in the sky (for that is of importance too), little gnomes were running around freely (they had a recent infestation due to SOMEDODY'S prank), and the giant squid was wrestling for his life with the Loch Ness monster in the lake (he was visiting, wanting a break from 'the bloody tourists').

Dumbledore was up in his office, eyes glued to the glowing round ball he had been sent. "OOOooooooooo. Pretty lights." And with a flash, he was gone.

Not a moment later, McGonagall burst through the doors, Marauders in tow. "Professor!" She stopped when she saw no one was there. She turned to the three. "You are dismissed this time you ruffians, but next time when the headmaster is here… be warned!" She stomped out leaving the three in the room.

Looking around, Remus 'Accio'd' a glowing ball towards him. "Look Sirius! It's one of Sauron's balls!" (A/N: … Who here got that one? Luke: I did! Hahaha!)

"No, no, Remmie, Sauron is fictional."

"So are we! What if this is a terrible cross-over?"

"It can't be," James said, staring into the ball, "the author's not like that."

Sirius was meanwhile wandering around muttering things like "I'm fictional? I'm to hot to be fictional!"

Remus ignored him and continued on his plot conspiracy, "Let's go save Dumbledore, for surely he was taken by the Dark Side! We must change him back!"

James sighed. "Remus, don't you mean 'bring' him back, not 'change' him back?"

"NO! He's been taken by the power of the Dark Sith Lord! We must bring him back to Gondor!"

"… Remus. Stop." James said, and then went back to trying to pry Sirius from the window ledge he was trying to commit suicide from. "Sirius, you have to bloody stop going with Remmie to those Muggle movies."

With his uber-super-duper werewolf strength, Remus pried Sirius from the window sill and dragged him out of the castle. "Let's go save Dumbledore!" Remus whistled and a dragon swooped down, eating the inconspicuous future Death Eater who had been sneaking up on them covered in leaves to disguise himself. Remus petted his dragon as they all climbed on, the garden gnomes following. "Up, up and away!"

They dashed after the other retreating dragon, which had two figures on its back, Voldie and Dumbledore.

A plain robed officer on a hippogriff (for magical re-enforcement), 'radio'd' into Magical Officers. "We've got a B-42. A high speed chase on dragons in sector 36 in progress. Hurry or we'll lose them… fly you fools!"

In a matter of moments, the Marauders had caught up to the other dragon. "You'll never get away with this!" Remus yelled down to Voldie (for they were above them.).

"I already have!" Maniacal laughter ensued. "Kukukukuku!"

Sirius picked up a gnome with some maniacal Russian laughter. "XaXaXaXaXaXa! Gnomes away!" He dropped the gnome down on Voldie.

"Gaaaaargh!"

Getting the idea, James helped Sirius throw gnomes at Voldie, but unfortunately, a gnome hit Dumbledore and he died. The dragon spiraled downwards, the Marauders following.

The dragon crashed and Remus hopped off his dragon with his wand out. "Put your hands on our head, get on your knees and lean up against the dragon. I have a wand and I'm not afraid to use it!"

"Remus!" James gasped, "I never knew you were gay with the Dark Lord!" With a carefully aimed curse, James lay twitching on the ground.

The Magical Officers swooped down on their hippogriffs and read Voldie his rights. "His alcohol level is over the limit." Voldie was thus handcuffed and dragged away muttering things of "But the rum!"

James and Sirius went over to the dead Dumbledore only to find it was Peter Pettigrew dressed as Dumbledore. "But then where's Dumbledore?"

From the house near they had crashed stepped out a man in a frilly neon pink lady's dressing gown. It was Dumbledore. "Oh, hello boys!"

"Dumbledore? Why are you HERE?" James asked as Remus finished blowing the imaginary smoke from the end of his wand after patting a hippogriff on the rump, sending it on its way with inebriated and arrested Voldie on the back.

"Oh, I realized that I was about to miss my favorite Soap, so I rushed here to watch it because, well, TV's don't work in Hogwarts."

The boys said their good byes and went back to Hogwarts.

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"Well, we saved the world form certain doom/destruction."

"But what does it matter Remus?" Sirius cried. "We're fictional!"

Remus grabbed Sirius and snogged him.

"Sirius, you're real to me." And so, everything worked out. Remus and Sirius had hot, kinky sex every night, and so did Lily and James (She realized that she loved him when she was told of his heroics). And, because Peter Pettigrew was dead and Voldie was stuck in an insane asylum, there was no Dark Lord and Harry grew up in the loving arms of James and Lily with help from Sirius and Remus. Dumbledore kept watching his Soaps, and the loch ness monster married the giant squid (who knew the giant squid was a she?). The only thing wrong was that the gnomes ruled the forbidden forest, but the good thing was that they had special powers and took Remus' lycanthropy away.

Everything was good until…one day, Sirius took Harry aside.

"Harry, I am your father, Godfather."

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Miyu: Well…. That settles that. Hope you like it. If so, leave a review, if not, leave a review. If enough people want another chapter, I might do another one. (I was thinking doing the gnomes…… Whaddaya think?)