Torn Between Two Lovers - a poem inspired by New Moon :)
How did I reach this point in my life?
When it seems that everything
Is being ripped apart
By the blade of a knife
I'm torn
Torn between two lovers
Both, who are very dear to my heart
I know I have to choose
But how will I decide
Which one gets my heart
And which one departs?
Why is this so hard to do?
I am a cross roads, how do I choose
Between the two?
My first love, is security, familiarity, stability
The new love, is devoted, fun, full of possibilities
The love with my first love,
Was strong and true
Together, there was nothing we couldn't do
But as time passed, resentment somehow grew
Pitting fault,blame and mistrust between us
So you left, claiming you need space
And some bullshit about you need time to think
To make sure this wasn't a waste
I wanted to try
You took away my choice
I was the one willing to fight
To keep you, and our love alive
But all I got from you
Is you pushing me away
Telling me you needed to get away
How I needed to relax, relax the chase
I was to leave you alone, and give you your space
So I complied, giving you your wish
And I floundered for a bit
Like a waterless fish
But I'm human, made of flesh and bone
So I tried
But all I got was, "Just leave me alone!"
Now my new love,
He stood by my side, saw me through all my pain
He said,"It'll be alright, there'll be love for you again."
I didn't want to hurt him
He deserved the truth
I was still caught up, with the love of my youth
He just shrugged and said
"It's okay, we'll enjoy this while we can
Right now I'm just content to be your friend,"
And he held my hand
I couldn't believe he still wanted me
And was willing to wait,
To see how this messed up situation
Would turn out to be
And as time went on
I started to see
Just how dear, he'd become to me
I said "I love you",
Perhaps by mistake, but I had fallen
And now it was too late
There was no turning back
I was headlong outside the gate
I had to let go of my silly pride
And stop denying what I felt inside
But then one day, he called and said,
"I want to give us another try,"
I was overwhelmed, my heart confused
I wanted to cry
Where did he come from?
Rehashing old pain...I thought it was over
No more...ever again
And my traitorous heart
Rejoiced at the sound of his voice
I had no say in the matter
Absolutely, no choice
But in the same instance
While one half was glad
The other half was sad
This was so hard, I didn't know what to do
How could I now choose, between the two?
Written September 22nd, 2009
by Yours Truly :D
(c) Sherine Jordan