Authors Notes: This is my first Heroes fic. I actually wrote this a few months ago during the first break of show but am only just getting around to posting it now. I really dislike the title but after ages of wracking my brain this was the best I could come up with. I hope the story isn't too bad and that you enjoy it.
Also as a warning, this story contains mentions of a relationship between Nathan and Peter. Although not explicit, it still has mentions of incest, so if this disturbs you then I really suggest that you do not read. Thank you.
Disclaimer: I do not own Heroes or any of the characters. They belong to NBC and Tim Kring.
Waiting For Your Kiss
He sat there, hands covering his face and let out a loud sigh; a sigh he felt he had been holding forever. Two weeks had passed. Two weeks since his younger brother Peter had fell into a coma and was hospitalised. Two weeks and the doctors still didn't have a goddamn clue what was wrong with him. Two weeks and still no change; the rapid movement of his eyes the only thing symbolising that he was still alive. But for how much longer nobody knew. His fever just seemed to get worse and worse, and how long his body could keep up the strain was anyone's guess.
Nathan visited him at least twice a day. And each time he prayed that when he arrived, Peter would be sitting upright in his bed smiling and would tell him that he had spent the past two weeks worrying for nothing. Hell, he wouldn't have even cared if he babbled on about the whole save the cheerleader, save the world crap, just as long as he got his brother back. But then again, the save the cheerleader thing was what had gotten Peter into this state in the first place.
He cursed out loud, furious at both himself and that woman his brother had been sleeping with. He had specifically told her not to show Peter that damn painting. He had even destroyed it. He hadn't even considered that there would be a photograph of it; didn't think she would actually show him it considering the content of the photo. For Christ's sake, it showed Peter covered in blood and dead! That should have been warrant enough. But no, Peter saw it and like the hero and idiot he is went to the exact location in the painting. Only him. Anyone else who saw a picture of themselves dead would stay clear of the place, but not Peter. He rushed right in there, probably without a second thought.
Nathan suddenly remembered back to something his wife Heidi had said six months prior, the same night as her horrible accident. They were on their way home from Peter's party celebrating his graduation from nursing school. While he had thought it was ridiculous that of all the professions his brother could have chose from he decided to become a nurse, she pointed out that he was selfless and righteous, that his decision to become a nurse and help people was part of who he was. And he couldn't disagree. He had been like that ever since he was a little kid. He had been told numerous times by his mother of how at the park Peter would lend his toys to other kids who were crying without a second thought. Unfortunately however the little brats never returned them, and it was rare that Peter would actually ask for them back. Maybe he gave them away because he knew when he got home there would be plenty there waiting for him. After all, when your parents are rich you really didn't have to worry about a lack of anything. Nonetheless, Nathan had the sneaking suspicion that the real reason he did it was because he hated seeing people being upset or crying. It was rare for a kid so young to have such a big conscience, to show such empathy for others, but that was Peter for you.
He got up from where he was sitting and moved towards the bed. He stood over it, a frown on his face, unable to stop himself from thinking how vulnerable his little brother looked. He placed his hand on Peter's forehead and gently brushed his bangs out of the way. He used to tell him that he was too old to have such a hair style, that he looked childish. But right now he found his bangs endearing. Despite how much he urged his brother to grow up and see the world for what it really is, he loved his childlike innocence. He was by no means immune to the pain and suffering of the world, in fact he experienced it all to well, all from relating to others. It was both a gift and a curse.
For Nathan however it was a only curse. If he could just think about himself for once, think hard about his future then he could have done so much better in life and in turn wouldn't be here lying in a hospital bed possibly dying for all anyone knew.
If only he had listened. Then again, when did he ever listen? It was almost as if every time he told him to do something, Peter would deliberately go and do it anyway just to spite him. He knew it wasn't really like that, but the trouble he caused him… And Peter didn't even realise it. Didn't he understand just how much he worried about him?
Peter had never been a troublesome kid, so when Nathan got that phone call all those years ago he couldn't believe what his mother was telling him. Peter had only been about nine or ten at the time while he had already left home to go to college. He did miss his family while he was away, especially his brother, and he knew he didn't see him enough. He was just to busy as student what with studying, partying and aiming to be top in every class so as to appease his father. But as soon as he received that phone call, he dropped everything he was doing and got the first flight he could to New York. Apparently Peter had been involved in a fight with a few other kids and as a result had gotten beaten up quite badly. When the teachers found him he had been unconscious.
He had felt like he would be stuck in the air forever as he waited for the plane to arrive in New York mostly because had no idea of the kind of condition his brother was in. His mother had been so upset when she spoke on the phone that he could barely make out a thing she was saying. He couldn't relax the entire flight, couldn't help but fear the worst. As soon as he got off the plane he had grabbed a taxi and headed straight over to the hospital. By the time he arrived his father had already left. Apparently he had some business to attend to, and for once Nathan found himself angry at him for putting his work before his family. He remembered his mum throwing her arms around him when he walked in and breaking into tears. He had found himself slightly taken aback. It was rare that his mother showed such emotion. She had stood there crying and holding on to him for a few minutes and he couldn't help but wonder if perhaps she had been holding it in from her husband.
"I'm so glad you're here." she said, placing her hand on his cheek.
"Don't worry about it." As much as he wanted to reassure his mum, what he really wanted was to see Peter. "How is he? Is he awake?"
She nodded, letting her hand drop then lifting it to her own face to wipe away the tears. "He woke up an hour ago."
"Can I see him?"
"His room is at the bottom of the corridor."
"Right." He started to walk, only to stop upon realising that his mum wasn't following him. He turned back around. "Aren't you coming?"
"I don't think Peter wants to see your father or I at the moment. But he'll be so happy to see you."
Nathan opened his mouth to respond but she had already turned away and was walking back to the waiting room.
He knocked lightly on the door and then walked in, praying that Peter hadn't fallen asleep. But the loud cry of his name as he entered the room reassured him that his brother was quite awake. "Nathan!"
"Hey there Peter, your big brother's here to visit you." he announced, quickly hurrying to his bedside.
He had a difficult time not wincing when he saw the bruises on the boy's face, especially the large black and purple eye he sported. "Peter…"
"I…I'm okay really." He whispered quietly, averting his eyes.
Nathan moved over and took a seat on the edge of the bed. "Well, you sure don't look it. I heard you sprained your wrist too."
"I-I thought you where at college." The boy stated sheepishly, hoping to change the subject.
"I was. I just wanted to make sure that my favourite little brother is alright." he replied, running his hands lightly through Peter's hair.
Peter giggled a little. "But Nathan, I'm your only brother!
"
"So? Doesn't mean you can't be my favourite. Anyway, are you going to tell me why you were fighting?"
The boy's smile faded.
"Peter?"
"You'll just get mad and yell like dad." He stated sadly. Nathan found himself both surprised and angry upon learning this. He understood why his father would be mad about Peter getting into a fight but to shout at him after he had just been through such an ordeal?
"Peter, I won't yell at you, okay?" he reassured him, flashing a sympathetic smile.
"You-you promise?" he asked timidly
Nathan frowned. His dad must have been fairly harsh on him for Peter to be this reluctant to talk to him. Usually when he saw his brother he would tell him every single thing that had happened to him since the last time he saw him. "Peter, I promise."
He gently brushed the boy's cheek and Peter nodded softly. "Okay."
"You gonna tell me what happened then?"
"I…I was walking home from school when I saw these guys beating up another kid. I yelled at them to stop but they wouldn't listen. And this one guy who was punching into the kid, well I tried grabbing him and-"
"Wait. Wait a minute, Peter. Are you telling me that you weren't even involved in this fight in the first place?" Nathan asked, interrupting him.
"Well, not really, but-"
"Goddamnit Peter! What were you thinking?!" he demanded, pushing himself off the bed and irritably placing his hands on his hips.
Peter winced at his brother's tone. "You promised that you wouldn't yell…" he pointed out, disappointedly.
Nathan sighed. He had, but decided to ignore it for now. "What…Why didn't you just call on someone?"
"There was nobody around."
"And what? You didn't think to search for someone?"
"But by then the kid could have gotten beaten up pretty badly!"
"Yes, but instead you did." He ran a hand through his hair, trying to remain calm.
"Where is this other kid anyway? Did you even know him?"
The boy shook his head. "I don't know where he is. After I pulled that other kid off him, he ran off."
"And that's when those other kid's focused their attention on you right?" He gritted his teeth, thinking about the kid that got away, the one that Peter had tried to protect. Little bastard had probably gone straight home without telling anyone that thanks to him, some other kid –his brother- was getting his ass kicked.
"I don't get it, Peter. If you didn't even know this kid, why get involved?"
"Because…"
"Because what?"
Peter frowned and unable to turn over due to his sprain wrist settled for facing away from his brother.
"Peter?"
No reply. Nathan sighed realising that he had upset him. He hadn't meant to get so worked up, it was just… His brother's injuries could have been a lot more serious than they were, and the thing of it was that if he had just stayed out of it then he would be completely fine, at home, tucked up in bed or as he suspected under his bed sheets with a comic on his lap and a torch in one hand.
"Peter, look, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to get so worked up," he said, sitting himself back down on the bed. "I'm just worried about you. I mean, when mom called… I…I thought for the worst."
Peter spoke, but didn't turn round. "Do you mean that? Where you really worried about me?"
"What? Of course." he replied, slightly taken aback.
"Then…Then how come you never visit home anymore? I miss you…"
He frowned. Sometimes he really hated his little brother's honesty. There wasn't anything like a little kid's innocent and incidentally hurtful words to make you feel this guilty, or in other words a complete asshole.
"I've been busy with college. I wanted to come home, it's just…" He had no excuse. It would have been easy enough to visit if he had really wanted to. He stopped and placed his hand softly on Peter's head. "I'm sorry. From now on I'll try to visit more often."
The boy's head shot around; the frown he wore disappearing and a smile appearing in its place. "Really?"
He nodded. "Of course. And this time, I really do promise."
"Thanks, Nathan." Sometimes whenever he saw his little brother smile he couldn't help but feel that it was contagious as he himself couldn't stop from doing the same.
"So, I guess this means you'll be getting a few days off of school." He said, now ruffling Peter's hair.
"Yep! But I don't wanna stay in the hospital. It's boring here."
"You've only been awake for an hour. You can't be that bored already."
"Well, I am. I wanna go home."
"Well, you should have thought about that before you-" He paused. "Anyway, you should probably try and get some sleep."
"Do I have to?" he whined, reminding Nathan that despite his strong sense of justice, he was still just a kid.
"Afraid so. In any case do you know how late it is? The only reason they're letting me in here to see you right now is because of who dad is."
Suddenly the boy's face saddened at the mention of his father. "I hope dad doesn't get mad again."
"He didn't mean it. You know that."
"I don't understand, Nathan. I thought we were supposed to help people in trouble. But dad said I should have just ignored it!"
He frowned. Explaining it to a kid like Peter would be difficult. "If I hadn't of done it, then that kid would have been hurt."
"Yeah, but instead, you're the one who got hurt. Look, I know you might see people that you want to help, but you…you can't go about trying to save everyone. Sometimes you have to do what's best for you, and if that means escaping trouble then you should probably do it."
"Does…does that mean if I get into trouble you wont help me?" the young boy questioned, worriedly.
"What? No! No. We're brother's Peter. It's different with us. We're family. We care about each other. What I'm saying is you shouldn't risk getting hurt for a complete stranger. Hell, they probably won't even appreciate it." he said, his cynicism seeping through.
"I think I understand." Peter replied, after a minute or two of reflection.
"That's good then. Plus it means I won't have to worry about you getting into anymore trouble." He bent over and affectionately kissed him on the forehead. "Now, it's time for you to sleep."
He pouted. "Can't we talk more? I have so much to tell you! Like how the school took us on a field trip to the Museum of Natural History! Most of it was really boring but we did get to see some cool stuff like-"
"Wow. Wow. Calm down, okay? You can tell me about it in the morning." interrupted Nathan, knowing that if he didn't stop him now the kid would never shut up.
"Does that mean you're staying?" he asked, excitedly.
"I guess I could stick around for a day or so." He knew that it probably wasn't a good idea and that he'd have to spend the entire night he got back catching up on his classes but the glorious smile that broke on his brother's face was more than worth it.
"I'm gonna go check on Mom. Get some sleep, kay?"
He got up and walked towards the door, ready to leave when Peter called out to him. "Nathan!"
"Yeah?"
"I love you."
He smiled. "I love you too."
It was this single event that revealed to Nathan just how much he really cared about his younger brother. How much he really meant to him. And he kept his promise, he did visit more often. And every time he would walk through that door, Peter would run up and hug him, and tenderly he would hold the boy in his arms. Sadly, Peter wouldn't stop getting into trouble however. That's exactly why he was here. That night all those years ago, Peter hadn't really understood; those damn altruistic morals carrying on to adulthood. This cheerleader, whoever she was, was a complete stranger, and yet Peter still made it his mission to protect her at the risk of his own life. Back at the hospital all those years ago Peter had been awake. He was hurt but fine, and even able to smile that beautiful smile of his. But now he just lay there, no one sure if he would ever wake up again.
He ran his hand against his lifeless brother's cheek. Would he ever hear them again? Those words, 'I love you'? Whether it was the innocent brotherly love they once had or something more. He knew that his relationship with Peter was far beyond normal; far beyond what any other brothers shared. They hadn't been together in so long; Nathan trying to stop himself for Heidi's sake, but he hadn't thought it would be there last time. He knew that eventually he would give into his urges, that he would be unable to resist the sweet look on his brother's face and that he would take him into his arms refusing to let go. After the last time he had been so thorough with Peter that they could no longer do this anymore, that no matter how much he loved him and despite how much it would hurt him he was determined to put an end to it. Nonetheless, deep down he knew it wouldn't last. It never did. But now there was the possibility that he would never even get to hear him speak again, that he would never again see that sweet smile of his.
He stood there for a few minutes, staring down sadly at him and then turned around quickly checking if anyone was about. No one was. It was the middle of the night after all. He was the only one that visited at this kind of hour. Satisfied that no one was watching he bent down and pressed his lips softly against Peter's. Slowly he pulled away, his heart aching that the kiss wasn't returned. He was suddenly reminded of that fairytale he heard the nanny reading to his kids the other day, 'Sleeping Beauty'. Supposedly the Prince would arrive and awake the sleeping princess with his loving kiss. He wasn't sure why he thought about that, the situation completely different. After all, Peter looked like shit lying there and he was far from the valiant noble prince portrayed in fairytales. Yes, unlike the prince he couldn't protect anybody; couldn't protect his brother despite swearing to do so since that day. Peter wouldn't awake and return the kiss. They wouldn't go and live happily ever after. Peter looked up to him as his hero and he let him down. And now both of them were paying the price. Peter was loosing his life and he was loosing the person he cared about most in this world.
"I have to go now, Peter. But I'll be here in the morning, I promise." With one final glance he turned away and left closing the door behind him.
Authors Notes: I hope that was all right. Any constructive criticism or advice on how I could improve would be greatly appreciated. Thank you for reading!
