Royal Woods… a small neighborhood of people just 12 miles from Detroit. It's a normally peaceful existence where the residents just go on about their day all carefree like. While there are some…deplorable individuals in the community, there is only one known "criminal" in the area. If you could even call him that.
"Hey, who's callin' me a criminal?! I prefer the term "entrepreneurial businessman!"" A rotund man with grey hair, a grey mustache and a red shirt bellows to the heavens as if God himself was passing judgement on this lowly gas station/convenience store manager.
"Yes, Flip." The voice cynically quipped; "And I prefer the term "greedy extortionist." Seriously, if those two interns you hired released that security camera footage, you'd be done in this town… In fact, why hasn't OSHA started investigating you?"
The mere mention of OSHA terrifies Flip back into working, but 2 black vans surround the gas station and people that look like government agents come out.
"Attention, Flip! We are from the Occupational Safety and Health Administration! We have a warrant to allow us to check your business for an impromptu health inspection!"
"Well it seems like he'll be busy for a while, but as I said, there are no real problems here and…" (notices a familiar decrepit looking blue van in front of a building with a cross on it)
"Oh boy, this isn't going to be good, let's see what happened this time…"
The scene changes to the inside of the Royal Woods General Hospital, the sound of electrocardiograms and frantic footsteps of the medical personnel deafen the building.
A man wearing a dark green shirt hurriedly runs up to the receptionist counter. The woman at the counter says:
"Oh, it's you, Lynn, did it happen again?" She slyly says to the man as she gestures to the ladies in the waiting room. There were 9 of them all trying to stave off boredom. With all these girls, you might confuse Lynn for a protagonist in a harem anime, but this isn't that kind of show, for you see, Lynn is actually their dad (yes, for all nine of them)!
"Ha ha, very funny." Lynn retorted "I came here to check on one of my daughters."
While the two adults were talking, a lone boy joined the group of girls. He had white hair, which is odd, because his dad has brown hair and his mother had blonde hair, nevertheless, he is still related to all of them. He looks directly at you, dear reader, and says:
"What's up? The sky." The boy said, stating the obvious answer
A girl with pale brown hair and a yellow skirt laughs at the boy's deadpan statement.
"Good one, Linc!" The girl stated.
The boy resumed speaking: "Hey reader, Lincoln Loud here. I know that you people usually look to me to try to make sense of what's going on but…I actually don't know what's going on, all dad told us is that one of us got hurt…I'm afraid I don't know any more than that…"
"But I do." said a soft, yet gravelly, female voice; "Where am I?" Well, in the hospital, silly." I will tell you everything, but for that we need to start at the beginning."
Crashing through the crowded halls
Dodging girls like ping-pong balls
Just to reach the bathroom on time
Leaping over laundry piles
Diapers you can smell for miles
Guy's gotta do what he can to survive!
In the Loud House, in the Loud House
Duck, dodge, push and shove
Is how we show our love!
In the Loud House, in the Loud House!
one boy and ten girls
Wouldn't trade it for the world!
Loud, House, Loud, Loud House!
Poo-poo