Of Love and Fear

Stefan

It frightens him sometimes, when she does something that shows how much she loves him. Precisely because of how much he loves her.

Being with Katherine was never like this. Katherine would always have taken the path that ensured her own safety over anyone else. It wasn't and isn't in Katherine's nature to be self sacrificing. Even as Katherine was tormenting Elena's loved ones to get to him, this truth protected him from believing the endless declarations of love.

Katherine's actions were about what they always were: Katherine getting what she wanted. If Katherine actually got what she wanted in this case, her so-called love would expire soon after. Stefan is absolutely certain of this. This is about conquering him. Damon (poor Damon) had given her his heart unreservedly and she stomped on it without a moment's regret. Stefan on the other hand had made it clear that Katherine couldn't have him. Which is precisely why she wanted him, he thinks. The pursuit is about winning for Katherine, it always was.

Elena on the other hand? Elena's love for him is real. The knowledge overwhelms him with joy; and beneath that joy lies the whisper of fear.

Elena values his well being above her own. For Stefan, who values Elena's well-being much more than his own, this is both wonderful and terrible. It's wonderful because she loves him. Every bit as much as he loves her. But it's terrible because this means he could lose her.

Stefan recalls her walking into a house filled with vengeful vampires, armed with nothing but a single vervain-filled tranquiliser dart and love for him, intent on rescuing him. She could have died that day, with terrifying ease; because she loved him so much.

And after that the memory of his Elena unlocking the door in the basement and walking in just when he'd told her that he was no longer weakened by vervain.

Stefan was consumed with self-hatred after what he'd done to Amber. That poor, helpless child. The bloodlust had consumed him and the fear that it could have been Elena consumes him in its place. But Elena feels no such fear. Doesn't she understand that he can't live without her? Doesn't she realize that he could kill her?

Stefan has known humans to run for their lives from the look on his face as he snarls at her to get out. Instead she disregards his deliberate attempt to frighten her into protecting herself from him. Elena takes a step closer to him, defiantly telling him no. She saw the kind of monster he could become. What on earth was wrong with his love that she didn't keep her distance when he told her to?

Elena's love for him will get her killed one day, Stefan worries. So he breaks the promise he made to himself and decides to teach himself to safely consume human blood. It is the only way he'll be strong enough to protect her.

And as she extends her curled palm to him, her blood pooled in its centre and such complete trust in her eyes, Stefan steels his resolve. He will get stronger; he will learn to consume human blood and control himself. There is no other option. Because Stefan would never forgive himself if Elena died for him.

He wouldn't survive losing her (especially at his own hand).

Elena

She doesn't understand how it could happen so quickly (loving him this much), but she isn't surprised because it's Stefan. He is the most extraordinary person she's ever met.

Vampires are predators and humans their natural prey. She knows this; she does. It's just that Stefan is an exception. It's not that she is fearless; when he'd first told her what he was, she'd been terrified. But he has proven that he would never hurt her. And now even when Stefan himself doubts this, she cannot.

Even after the incident with Amber, Elena can't be afraid of Stefan. She is frightened of the person the blood turns him into (she wouldn't be sane if she wasn't); that person isn't her Stefan. But she doesn't walk away; it's far too late for her to be able to walk away.

It wasn't a lack of fear that made her unlock the door to the basement; it was her love for him. Stefan was in pain and it was her fault because she fed him her blood. It didn't matter that he snarled at her either because she could see that he was protecting her.

(Stefan is obsessed with her safety even in the middle of his own suffering, and he honestly doesn't understand how she isn't afraid?)

She couldn't let him suffer like that alone; she refused to stand behind that locked door and watch him be consumed by his guilt and pain.

And although that house had been filled with vampires who would've killed her without blinking, it hadn't mattered. Stefan was in that house. They were hurting him. There was no way she could stay in the car. He needed her.

Her love for him leaves no room for fear.

Stefan is a vampire. She is human. When Elena thinks about this it brings an ironic smile to her face. Stefan is so protective of her, how could she be afraid of him? Long before she knew what he was, he'd made sure that she was protected from being compelled.

She just has to look at Stefan to know that 'Uncle' John is wrong about vampires.

Elena feels safest when she's in his arms. (She doesn't tell him this because she knows it would scare him.)

They have an extremely tactile relationship. Stefan is always hugging her, or kissing her, combing her hair with his fingers, stroking her cheek. He would make a wonderful father, she thinks, saddened by the thought. Their children would never be able to doubt for a second that their dad loved them.

It's incredible to her that it happened so quickly, but it's Stefan and that's explanation enough. Elena dreams of their future together, enclosed in his loving arms.

AN:

I think I've become slightly obsessed.

I love Stefan and Elena together, they make a wonderful couple. It sucks that they can't have kids together.

There is an extreme shortage of Stelena fics in this fandom so I thought I'd contribute one before going back to tackling my writer's block with Tread Lightly.

Oh and review people. It's the only way I'll get better at this.