Suddenly a Savior
She stepped out of Kelly's into the cool summer night, rubbing her clammy palms on her white cotton skirt, a soft smile on her face. She had just said goodbye to the few people in town that actually cared about her.
She turned around, gazing through the glass panels of Kelly's doors. Her grandmother was dabbing at her eyes with a handkerchief, trying to compose herself. She had understood why Elizabeth had to get out, but it still hurt her deeply to lose her favorite grandchild. Bobby was blowing her nose into a green dish towel, her mascara running down her face. She had said that she had seen Elizabeth's departure coming, but had hoped against hope to keep her in town somehow.
Penny was dabbing her eyes with a corner of her apron, sniffling quietly. She and Elizabeth had become good friends ever since she had started working here. She had been a horrible waitress, but Elizabeth assured her that she herself held the record for Most Dishes Broken. Afterwards, the two had become fast friends and had always stuck together.
Emily was crying into Nikolas' shoulder, while Lucky held his head in his hands. All three had tried to convince her to stay. She could build a new life for herself again, they had argued. She had done it so many times before. She was a fighter, they had said, and she could handle anything.
But even she couldn't handle this.
It was one thing to be raped, although that was traumatizing. It was one thing to lose a childhood boyfriend, to have him come back and not love her. It was one thing to lose her best friend after she had refused to run away with him. It was one thing to leave her intended at the altar, and then find him sleeping with her sister. It was one thing to be kidnapped and make a horrible mistake as a result of Post Traumatic Stress. It was one thing to leave the man she loved, then lose the child she had created with another man.
It was quite another thing to marry a sociopath, a lying, and hypocritical, manipulative man in an Ivy League suit. To carry the child of a rapist. A repeated rapist. A terrorist. To sit idly by with the wool securely over her eyes as he terrorized and kidnapped innocent women, keeping them away from their families and children. Wait at home as he had business dealings with arms dealers. Sit at the table with him and envision their children while he had slipped a mickey into her wine. Agonize and apologize to him for being infertile, without knowing he had bribed a doctor to deliver the news. Rush off to work without knowing that the orange juice he had so lovingly offered her contained the birth control pills that almost cost her her life.
She shook her head, berating herself for remembering. It was all over and done with. She had gone to Alexis as soon as Carly was delivered home, demanding a divorce. She hadn't asked for anything of him; all she wanted was a quick divorce. He had given in quickly enough. A smile tugged her lips. She suspected his promptness had something to do with the bullying tactics of his older brother and even the Quartermaines, whom Emily had turned in her favor. She even suspected that Lorenzo Alcazar was somehow involved in their domestic dispute, using his leverage to grant her a way out.
But now it was all over. The Scooby gang, Bobby, Gram, Penny, Zander, Lorenzo, and even Carly had come to wish her well. For the most part, they understood that she had to leave. And now it was time to do just that.
It's Independence Day I'm free
And it's a strange place to be
She picked up her duffel bag and strolled to the parking lot, wondering where she should go. Chicago. Miami. Atlanta. Houston. Denver. San Francisco. Phoenix would be oddly appropriate, she thought with a grin.
Whipping out her keys, she unlocked her new – used – 1991 Lexus. It was top of the line, with eight cylinders and more horse power than she ever knew was possible in a car she owned, and a smooth blue in color. It had set her back 6300, but that was okay. She just wouldn't be painting for a while. Or eating, she thought with a wry grin. What was important was that she had a large, comfortable car in excellent condition at an extremely reasonable price for her soul-searching cross-country trek. She had intended to buy something smaller, more economic. But when she went to check out a cute little Honda civic, she found that the owner also had this beauty sitting in his garage. And the rest was history.
She dumped her duffel in the trunk along with the emergency flares, blankets, water bottles, toolbox, and jumper cables. It never hurt a girl to be prepared. She was arranging her belongings in the trunk, her body halfway into the large car, when she heard footsteps on the pavement behind her.
She slowly turned, knowing who it was even before she did so.
"Hello, Elizabeth." His voice was smooth and full of charm, the same charm that had made him so attractive so long ago. Now that same voice made her skin crawl.
"What do you want, Ric?" she asked, glaring at her ex.
He smiled at her, much as a snake charmer smiles at a cobra. "Just wanted to wish you well, that's all."
She slammed the trunk down louder than was necessary, leaning her arms on it as she surveyed him. One hand was stuffed into his pocket, the other hefted a brown leather briefcase. Despite the fact that the night was comfortably warm, he wore his black trench coat over his gray silk suit. His spectacles had slid down his nose and a few strands of hair had fallen onto his forehead. He looked perfectly calm and collected. You'd never guess he was a dead man walking.
"Right, Ric. Whatever you say."
"Eliz-"
"What did you really come for?"
He moved closer, his voice slightly lower as he spoke. "Come on, Elizabeth," he scoffed. "You and I both know you're not going anywhere." He raised a brow as she lifted her chin, but continued before she could interject. "You always do these things. You get mad or jealous or lonely and you run off trying to prove a point that no one understands."
His words took her aback. Don't run off trying to prove a point no one gets.
Her surprise went unnoticed, and Ric continued. "You're going to run off for, what, a week before you come running back home? You'll go through the whole melodramatics of saying goodbye and packing up, only to come back after a little while. You've done it before."
Her eyes narrowed. Sanctimonious, all-knowing little prig. He knew # about her. The real her.
"Why can't we just skip it this time?" he spoke softly, a small smile tugging at his lips. Bastard. He thought he was so persuasive. He thought he could just turn on the charm and she'd forget everything, that she'd leap through hoops of fire with him to get back to the way they were.
"# you, Ric." She spun around and shoved her keys into the lock. She pulled the door open and got in, slamming it. Unfortunately for her, she had left the window open and Ric seized the opportunity.
Leaning his hands on the window, he began again, raising his voice. "Real mature, Elizabeth," he sneered. "You know next to nothing about the real world. You don't know where you're going, how you're going to pay for necessities, where you'll stay, how you'll deal with everyone you meet-" His voice took on a hint of desperation as she started the car smoothly and adjusted the mirror, shifting into Reverse. Without any further warning, Elizabeth pulled out of the parking spot, giving Ric just enough time to jerk his hands away.
"And you can teach me?" she spit out. "I'd rather stick embers in my eyes than spend another second with you."
As she braked and shifted into drive, Ric ran up to her and yelled, "You can't do anything without me, Elizabeth! You have no idea what you're getting yourself into!"
She smirked to herself. The man really was crazy. Pressing on the accelerator, she gave Ric the one-finger salute as the car leapt forward.
"Have a nice life, jackass!" she yelled triumphantly.
I'm gonna break these chains
Unleash the changes in me
She sped away from her diner, not looking back. It was a crisp, clear night in Port Charles, with hardly anyone on the streets. She stopped at a signal and continued, hearing nothing but the gentle purring of the engine. The car was so quiet. She laughed as she thought that she wouldn't be surprised if she ever left the engine running and had no clue about it. It was just that type of car.
The wind whipped through her hair, caressing the fingers she drummed against the side of the car. All the windows were open, and Elizabeth felt as if she were walking across water instead of driving down Main street. This car was definitely doing something to her, she smiled. It was making her as carefree and invincible as she had felt when she was a young girl. It was giving her her first taste of true freedom after a long time. It was no motorcycle, but it was all hers.
I see an endless road
I feel the restless wind
Before long, her four-wheeled beauty delivered her to her final destination. She parked quickly, turning up all the windows and locking the doors. She walked down the lit footpaths to the one spot she had avoided at all costs ever since she was 16.
She finally found herself staring at the bench. The bushes behind. The scraggly tree. This was where it had happened. This was where her life was torn apart, yet made at the same time. This was when rambunctious Lizzie Webber became mature Elizabeth Webber. This was where she became who she was.
I've lost the fear inside
How she hated this place. How she hated who she was now.
But she knew she couldn't leave Port Charles without visiting this place, without bidding goodbye to all the demons that crept up on her when she least expected it. This was it.
Cause I've got no choice
But to live or die
She felt her mind and spirit begin their tumultuous assault on her as she took in her surroundings. She tried to beat them back, but in time she gave up, surrendering to her feelings. She stood still as they waged their war, flaring inside her. Presently they died away, and she felt a small weight lifted away, gone forever. She wasn't afraid anymore.
But what was she?
She was 24 years old, a young woman with little more than a Bachelors degree. She was an aspiring artist, but that meant little in this world. She was all of these things, but what else was she? Was she happy? Pssh. Hell, no, she thought. Was she sad? Homesick? Nervous? Uncertain? Excited?
Alone. That's what she was.
Suddenly you're in this fight alone
Steppin' out into the great unknown
No, she wasn't alone. She was by herself. There was a big difference between the two. Alone was so terminal, so final. When she was by herself, she was just that: by herself. It meant there was a likelihood that she'd meet up with someone again. She'd fill her life with others. She wouldn't be by herself anymore.
She was going to be all right.
She nodded her head firmly. That was the way she was going to think from now on. There was no one for her to rely on anymore, no one to take care of her. And why should anyone? She wasn't a dependent; she knew how to take care of herself. She was a smart, capable woman, dammit, and she was finally going to start acting like one. It was her against the world, and she intended to win. Or at least not lose.
She pivoted on her heel, ready to leave. She was going to back to where her beautiful little Lexus was waiting. She was going to hit the road and find herself. Maybe she'd come back, and maybe she wouldn't. Life was all a game, and she was the one with the dice in her hand.
But she couldn't will her feet to move. They refused the signals from her brain, adamantly staying in their spot. Where had her sudden burst of confidence come from, they forced her to wonder. What was she doing? Was she going to succeed? Why was she so determined to succeed? Could she be overcompensating for something else? What?
She knew what. She hadn't said goodbye to him yet. And she didn't want to. Hell, she had never wanted to say goodbye to him, so instead she always said she'd see him later. But this time, that sure wasn't applicable. Their roads would likely never cross, and that's the way she wanted it. Then why was she feeling like she couldn't leave yet? Why was she feeling like she was leaving a part of her behind, whether she wanted to or not?
Jason, Johnny, Max, and Francis walked briskly through the park. They were to meet a contact by the fountain, and they wanted to get there early. This meeting was crucial.
They had just eliminated Alcazar's right-hand man in the drug business, and there was no telling how he was going to retaliate. Much to their surprise, he had asked for a meeting. Jason was suspicious in the beginning, but Sonny sent him out for it anyway.
The three men ducked the branches and tree limbs that swung in their faces, cursing the foliage. But the less people that saw them, the better. They just wanted to get this done.
Too bad we have no clue what's waiting for us in the park, Johnny thought glumly. He fingered his pistol tucked away in its holster, hoping to find some brief surge of reassurance. Nothing came.
Elizabeth finally managed to convince herself that she was being silly, and it was high time to leave. With her luck, Slic Pric Ric had followed her to the park and sat hunched up behind one of the bushes. The thought made her laugh. He would do that, too.
She straightened her purse and was about to walk away when she noticed some rustling in the bushes. Was it just her imagination? She moved closer slowly, her brows furrowed as she tried to discern whether the noise was her mind or…something. Someone.
And the night's the hardest time
When the doubts run through your mind
The rustling was heard again, but from a different bush. She turned halfway around, determined to find out what was spooking her so. She found herself staring at the exact same bush he had dragged her behind, so many years ago.
She shivered as a cool breeze met her skin, raising goose bumps there. She was being silly again. There was absolutely nothing for her to fear. She was so close to leaving the town, and certainly her overactive imagination wouldn't be able to stop her.
She was about to turn once more to walk away when a dark figure hurtled itself from the bushes. The figure grabbed her waist and struggled with her while she fought against him. One arm wrapped securely around her tiny waist, the other began battling with the strap of her purse, anxiously trying to free it.
She barely registered that he was wearing a ski mask as she fought blindly. Her mind bombarded her with memories of that night. How helpless she felt, how big he was, how he trapped her, dragged her, beat her, tore at her clothes, penetrated her and her defenses.
'Cause suddenly you find yourself alone
She choked underneath the barrage of memories. This wasn't that time. This was a simple thief, not a twisted rapist. She was a grown woman now, not a scared adolescent. And she could take care of herself.
She wrenched her arm free, using a powerful rotation of her wrist to send her purse flying into the darkness, away from her. This stunned her attacker, and the few seconds he paused gave her powerful leverage. While he retained a death grip on her other arm, she swung the other side of her body away from him, swinging back with her knee poised and ready. It hit him hard in the groin and as he doubled over in pain she pulled her arm free and brought a blow crashing down on his neck, sending him sprawling. Her old personal trainer would sure as hell be proud of her for this.
The men continued through the park, each absorbed in his thoughts. Johnny thought of how unusual Alcazar's move was. The man had just lost his ring leader, and he wanted to meet by the fountain? Even he knew something was up. But he hoped to God he was wrong. An ambush was the last thing they needed.
Max thought of how glad he'd be to get back home. Something about tonight was throwing him off-center. He had always known that Lorenzo Alcazar was not the typical enemy, but this was ridiculous. From the look on Johnny's face, he knew his old friend was thinking the same thing.
Francis shuffled through the grass, staring at his feet. He wasn't supposed to be gallivanting through a park at night. He was supposed to be in a secluded warehouse somewhere, kicking the living # out of Ric Lansing. Sure, he was upset that the man had kidnapped his employer's wife, but his reasons for hatred were far more personal: Elizabeth. Ric Lansing had played her and this city like a freaking harp from hell, and he was going to pay.
Jason was the most aloof out of all the men, much to even his own surprise. He smelled a rat with this meeting too, but that wasn't what occupied his thoughts. For once, he wasn't thinking about business. He was thinking of his fiancé.
Or rather, former fiancé.
Things hadn't been so great for a while, even before they got engaged. But he deluded himself into thinking they were fine, and proposed anyway. Or rather, Carly proposed. No, he thought, shaking his head. That was sick. At first, it had been little things, like the way she had redecorated his apartment, or how she always seemed to stab her eggs with her fork. Little stupid things like that. But then when Carly went missing, it had escalated.
He'd come home every night, exhausted as hell and extremely frustrated. He always wanted to smash something, but didn't because he knew she was asleep upstairs. So he'd crawl into bed, ready to get a few hours of sleep before resuming his search. And that's when she'd always cuddle up against him, touching him and stroking him even when he pushed her hands away. His best friend, her sister-in-law, was missing, and Courtney wanted to have sex?
He'd let it go, but pretty soon she began to aggravate him further. She'd say stupid things like, "Remember when Carly brought over flowers to your penthouse so it would be romantic when you proposed?" As if she had any real memories of Carly. She didn't. He was the one that had memories. She hadn't even known Carly for that long. And then she'd push the wedding issue, saying, "Carly would want us to get married."
It was times like those that he had wanted to throttle her, shake her big donkey teeth right out of her head. He wanted to scream at her that how dare she use Carly's name in vain like that? How could she say something so stupid? And then when he thought it was Ric, she had not-so-tactfully let him know that she didn't believe in his instincts. Then when the truth came out and they had Carly back, she offhandedly remarked that they were extremely lucky.
Lucky. That was it.
His frustration had slowly gotten the better of him until he had yelled at her and they had a huge fight. Needless to say, she left him and ran straight to Sonny. True to his previous advice, Sonny had told her that she never had any business getting involved in his world, and it wasn't Sonny's fault that she couldn't handle it. Jason had stood outside Sonny's door while Sonny had given Courtney the speech, not paying any attention to her whining pleas. And then he had walked back to his penthouse, closing the door behind him.
And laughed.
He had laughed long and hard, until he found himself in near tears. He had laughed at her for being so childish, he had laughed at Sonny for his indifferent and monotone speech, and he had laughed at himself for being involved with her.
But now he was back to being himself, and his doubts came back. Had he done the right thing? He wasn't so sure anymore. He had sent the woman he loved running. Away from him. That made the third time a woman had left him. Or was it fourth, since Elizabeth had done it twice? He shook his head. It didn't even matter anymore. All that mattered was that he was alone. And maybe that was the way it was supposed to be.
Suddenly you find yourself
In an empty room
With a suitcase on the floor
Jason and his men continued their quick pace through the trees when the nighttime silence was interrupted by a shrill scream. All four stopped in their tracks, muscles and limb tense for action. They looked briefly at each other, and seeing that the action wasn't approaching them, they charged through the foliage in the direction of the noise.
Johnny arrived before the rest, pushing apart the tree branches to leap into the clearing, his gun cocked and ready. What he saw before him took his breath away and made him doubt his eyes.
Elizabeth Webber was dusting her hands off and bending over to retrieve a purse. She turned without seeing him when he noticed her assailant on the ground reach out an arm to grab her ankle. He pulled her down and she screamed again into the grass, already kicking away and scrambling to regain her footing. Desperation kicked in once more and she fisted her hands in the grass, tearing away parts of the earth. Come on, Webber. You can do this.
It'll be daylight soon
I'm gonna wage my private war
As he heard Jason and company come up behind him, Johnny pointed the gun at the fallen man, barking, "Hold it right there!"
Elizabeth squeaked and looked up, staring wide-eyed at an armed Johnny. Before she knew what was happening, Francis and Max were at her side, lifting her up while Jason kicked at her attacker, then lifted him up, slamming his back into a nearby tree trunk. Johnny still stood with his gun cocked just in case of trouble, his dark eyes darting back and forth for any signs of witnesses. None.
Elizabeth freed herself from Francis and Max, flashing both a grateful smile. She appreciated her help, they understood from her eyes.
Who's watchin' over me?
Must be a guardian angel
Jason tossed the man at Johnny, who had by now called up two other guards. The two men dragged the thief away a short distance and all men turned back to Elizabeth.
"You alright?" Jason asked gruffly, his eyes traveling up and down her body in search of bruises or cuts.
"I'm fine," she replied curtly, dusting the dirt from her arms. She wiped at a smudge on her chest. Trust her to be stupid enough to be wearing a tube top tonight. It was the same one she had worn on the Fourth of July. At the back of her mind, she had hoped that day that Jason would see her. Now she cursed herself for that thought. She didn't like the way he kept looking at her.
"Good." He stepped forward, his eyes blazing. "Then you want to tell me what you were doing alone in the park at night?"
She rolled her eyes. She really didn't feel like dealing with him and his protective idiosyncrasies right now. "Gee, I don't know, Jason," she drawled, massaging her forearm. "The same thing I was doing that same night in this same spot when I was 16."
Her answer surprised him. His eyes traveled to the bench, the tree, the bushes. Holy #. His eyes darted back to meet her indifferent green ones. Jason didn't like what he saw there.
But in an instant he was in front of her, his hands on her smooth shoulders, cursing fate. He searched her face for cuts, narrowing his eyes when he spotted one above her eyebrow.
He licked his thumb and tried to blot at the cut, but she pushed him away firmly.
"Thanks for the concern, pal," she retorted sarcastically. "But I don't need your help. I was just leaving anyway."
Stung but not defeated, Jason persisted. "Where are you going?" he demanded. Looking around at the three guards, he continued, "I'm sure one of us can drop you. Brownstone? Studio? Hotel? The Quartermaine's?"
"Nope," she answered with a shake of her head. The man was so freaking dense. Like she would actually stay in this town after what happened. She could barely look him in the eye as it was. "I'm leaving." She hoped it sounded final enough and Jason picked up the hint.
No such luck.
"As in where?" Max piped up, crossing his arms over his chest. All four men gazed at her, awaiting an answer, and Elizabeth almost wanted the ground to swallow her up.
No, she thought. She wasn't going to duck out like a little kid. "I'm leaving Port Charles. For good."
I just need time to breathe
And give my life the best of me
Jason's mind jolted. She couldn't have said what he thought she said. The other guards seemed to be having the same thoughts.
"Excuse me," began a flustered Francis. "I must have been hallucinating. What did you say?"
"I'm leaving."
"What!" All four men screamed the question at once, causing Elizabeth to jump slightly before she resolved to stand firm.
"You can't go!" Johnny yelled, while Francis cried, "There's no reason for it!" Even Max felt the need to join in, with, "What the hell for?"
Jason pinched the bridge of his nose. "Guys, could you leave us alone for a minute?"
Johnny and Max looked at each other while Francis glared at Elizabeth. They shuffled off with a "Sure, Jason," while Francis whispered accusingly to Elizabeth, "You didn't even say goodbye."
She looked down at the grass. He was right. She should have at least found her favorite guards and told them, even if she didn't want to face either Sonny or Jason.
Jason looked at her. She looked so small, so delicate. Her white skirt was covered in smudges, and her tank top was no better off. Her sandals had been discarded long ago, and she was wiggling her red painted toes in the grass. He wanted to strangle her for being here, for almost getting hurt, for being so indifferent, and for leaving. But then he wanted to pick her up and hug her to him, for remembering the rape, for being attacked at the same spot, for leaving, and for…being Elizabeth.
"Why are you leaving?" he asked softly. He needed to know. He needed her to talk to him. He needed to make a connection with her.
"I think you know why," she answered, lifting her chin a notch.
"Explain to me anyway."
She sighed and averted her eyes. He knew this was painful for her, but he wanted her to talk about it.
She stared at the scraggly tree, wanting to blame it for all her problems. He wanted to know why she was leaving. The idiot. As if he didn't know. As she stared at the pathetic tree, her anger grew. When she looked at him again, he was surprised to see her eyes blazing.
"You want to hear me say it, Jason?" she jeered. She stepped closer to him, cocking her head to the side. "I was an idiot. A complete idiot." Her eyes narrowed. "But you already knew that, right?" she cried, throwing her hands in the air. "Big surprise. Little Lizzie makes a complete fool of herself yet again. Just one more mistake for the record."
"Eliza-"
She ignored him, her eyes hard and cold. "That's what I know you want to hear. How stupid I was, how I should have listened to you, how I'm sorry for being so # naïve."
Her language took him by surprise, but she continued anyway. "That's all you're interested in. The Mighty Jason Morgan was right again. Never mistrust his instincts; never doubt him, because you're going to be the one that's royally screwed in the end."
"Elizabeth, I'm not here to say I told you so," he tried to explain.
"Well then, let's just say I saved you the trouble," she sneered. "You were right, I was wrong, that's how it's always been."
"Now, wait a minute," he interrupted, slightly annoyed. "I never said anything. I just asked why you were going. I don't know why you're going off on me, but then again, I'm used to it by now."
Her jaw dropped. "You're a sanctimonious, self-righteous bastard, you know that?" she asked, her voice dripping with venom. She snickered when Jason's eyes widened. "Yeah, you heard me. You're so high and mighty, huh? Always up on your pedestal for the damn world to worship, right? Well, forget it. I stopped 'worshipping' you a long time ago, when I found out what you were."
"Aha," he nodded, crossing his arms. "Was this before or after you sulked out of my penthouse?"
She stopped. She never expected him to bring that up. But now that he had, there was no reason why she shouldn't go for it. "Touché," she grinned sardonically, taking a step forward. "I tore down your pedestal the moment the news announcer said that Sonny was alive. Alive and # well. I stopped the moment I realized that my best friend had lied to me. Allowed me to grieve with him, for him. That's when your prophesy came true: you said that one day I'd look at you and see who you were and my face would change and you couldn't deal with that." She watched as his eyes changed in recognition before moving a step closer. "But you dealt with it pretty well, didn't you, Morgan?"
He dropped his head. What was he supposed to say to that? He had said all that in the past, that fateful night on his leather couch. Her in a low-cut tank top, her old-school afghan across her lap, him in his wet suit with a gigantic cut on his forehead. She had poured out her heart that night, just like he did. Then why was it so hard to talk to her now? He looked up at her, hesitantly. He had never fought with her like this. A year before, he would have bet his life ten times over that he never would.
Suddenly you're in this fight alone
Steppin' out into the great unknown
He didn't feel like discussing Courtney, so he let it go. He just didn't want to fight with her anymore, but he had a feeling it wouldn't be so easy.
"Why didn't you tell me you were leaving?" he whispered, his voice soft and gravelly.
Elizabeth sighed and studied her toes. Round number two. "Why would I?" she asked, lifting her gaze up to his. There was no fire, no venom. Only defeated and indifferent curiosity.
He looked at her quizzically. "Because we're friends," he replied slowly, as if tasting and weighing each word carefully.
She tilted her head to the side once more, a habit that was really beginning to annoy him. Whenever she did that, she came up with something caustic to say. "Friends?" she asked, giving him a wide-eyed look. "Are we friends, Jason?"
"Yes!" he exclaimed, fed up with her cynical tone.
"We're not friends. Not at all."
"We were," he argued. "Doesn't that count for anything?"
"It counts for #."
That did him in. Even though he and Elizabeth weren't close as of late, he had always treasured their friendship. Or the remaining shards of it. It was the first time he realized how huge their rift had become. He wondered how he let it happen, and kicked himself for letting her walk away in more ways than one. And then he called himself every foul name he could think of for not trying to bridge the gap.
"What did you want of me?" His voice was quiet and resigned, his eyes still downcast. But Elizabeth, in her torrential fury, failed to notice his resignation.
"I wanted you to need me," she burst out, her voice sounding as if it had been ripped straight from her soul. It broke Jason's heart to hear her sound this way. As it seemed, she always had a monopoly on breaking his heart. He saw the tears glisten in her emerald eyes, but she refused to let them fall. "I just wanted you to need me! Was that so wrong, Jason? Did that not fit in with one of your mob codes? Was that it? Was that why you pushed me away? Just give me a damn reason!"
Her outburst tugged his heartstrings. Hell, tugged wasn't the right word. Yanked out and dragged was more like it. He hated seeing her in pain, and this time it was his fault. Or was it?
She was the one that had left him, after all.
But before he could remind her of what happened the day she walked out, her words hit him for the second time. I wanted you to need me. Did she actually think he didn't need her then?
The thought shook him; it had never occurred to him before. Didn't she know how much it meant to him that she was with him, in his home? Didn't she know that even if he had a bad day, it made it all worth it to come home and see her reclined on his couch, sketching? To hear her singing show tunes in the shower? To have her scent of jasmine and lilacs invade every object in the dull penthouse, invade his very being? To hear her talking to the birds from their balcony, to play a game of pool and see her eyes light up when she sank a shot? Lord, he used to stand by her door at night for an hour, just watching her sleep and listening to her talk to herself. He wondered what she was dreaming of, if he was in her dreams like she was in his. At times he found himself hoping she'd have a nightmare or call out in her sleep just so he could rush in, climb onto her bed, and hold her to him until she fell asleep against his chest. He had wanted to make her feel as safe and secure in his penthouse as he wanted her to feel with him.
And besides that, she was his angel. There had been so many times that he'd almost done something dangerous or stupid: a fistfight, harassing Taggert, an unnecessary 'business trip' to an unruly associate, but the mere thought of her waiting for him at their home stopped him.
Their home. When had he started calling it that?
She had saved him so many times, just like she said he had. Then how did they end up like this? What had they done wrong? Was it even in their control, or were they beating themselves and each other up for fate's cruel intentions?
The whir of a police car brought him out of his reverie. He looked warily around him, not noticing the way Elizabeth was watching around him.
She could see his apprehension in his eyes, his face, his body. The way his blue eyes became guarded, how he pursed his lips together, how each and every muscle in his sculpted body seemed to tense up and get ready for flight. Or action.
She remembered how he used to look warily out of her studio window when he had stayed there during her Face of Deception crisis. The thought made her smile. He had always listened to her so patiently when she explained that she was no good at modeling and how she'd never be able to sell lipstick. He had always told her how grateful he was that she was keeping his arrival a secret.
She frowned. And then she had kicked him out when the going got tough. She had ditched her best friend. No, she chided herself. Her former best friend. The best friend nonsense ended the day she walked out on him. After he walked out on her.
Jason stopped fidgeting and turned his gaze back at Elizabeth only to see her frowning at her toe. He cleared his throat, and when she looked up at him he was surprised at the resentment that still burned in her eyes. He thought they had already worked through that. Kind of.
She scoffed once more, then turned her back towards him. She threw her head back and gazed up at the clear Port Charles sky. The stars twinkled from the heavens, putting on a show for those in the mortal realm. The Big Dipper. Little Dipper. Orion's Belt. They were all so far away, reminding her how isolated she was. And how small.
She remembered the last time she really paid attention to the stars. "I gazed up at the stars the night we almost-" she coughed quickly, stifling her sentence. "The night we were both at my studio after Carly's party."
Jason snapped back to attention. He didn't think she had anything left to say, the way she was standing, refusing to look at him. He remembered that night, too, he wanted to say. He had looked at those same stars. Driven his bike into the hills and flopped down by a small stream and just lay there, gazing into the heavens. He always thought there was so much wisdom up there. Whenever he hit a rough patch in his life, he'd gaze up at the heavenly kingdoms and hope to tap into just a small piece of that knowledge. He never did, but he always felt he left a better person for it.
And now he knew they both sought that knowledge. Too bad neither had gained it.
Her back still to him, she continued, "I gazed up at them as soon as the roar of your bike died away. I even crawled up onto my fire escape, a cushion behind my back and my afghan on my lap. I thought about making a quick cup of coffee, but I didn't want to ruin the moment, you know? The stars are so sacred."
He nodded, knowing she couldn't see him.
"I sat there for hours," she murmured, her head still thrown back. "I sat and I watched and I listened and I felt. I thought of how, in all my impulsiveness, I'd actually stumbled upon something amazing that night. I kissed you. Do you know how long I had wanted to kiss you?"
Her words surprised him. Hell, she wanted to kiss him? He had wanted to do worlds more.
"I knew it was all for the wrong reasons, but I couldn't stop myself. I don't know how I did. Maybe I just reminded myself that I was behaving too much like Lizzie Webber. The one that entered Jake's that night looking for trouble. I didn't want to be her, not with you. Anyone but you."
I wouldn't have minded, he thought. Whoa. Where did that come from?
"And after you left, I knew we had done the right thing. I knew it was wise to wait. So I sat there, horribly humiliated, yet oddly fulfilled. I couldn't stop thinking about you."
Vice versa, baby. Vice versa.
"I don't know what I wanted from the stars. Maybe I wanted to know that no matter how big of an idiot I had been, it was the big picture that mattered. Maybe I wanted to feel that there was always going to be someone watching over you and me, together or apart."
We watch over each other. That's how it's always been.
"I wondered if everything I had done in the past few years was in vain. Should I have run away to Italy with you? Would you still want me with you if I had? Was it better this way, now that I wasn't a confused girl anymore? Should we have gone ahead with what we started that night? What would it have led us to? Did you want me the way I wanted you? Did you feel for me what I felt for you? Were you out there, somewhere, looking at the same stars, thinking of me?"
And the night's the hardest time
When the doubts run through your mind
A solitary tear slipped down her cheek before she flicked it away. No tears for her tonight. Tonight she was going to say her peace and then be rid of him. She had had so many questions that night, but the stars hadn't answered them. Those questions were never answered, and perhaps it was meant to be that way.
'Cause suddenly you find yourself alone
Behind her, a lump had formed in Jason's throat. God, if she only knew he had asked the heavens the exact same questions.
Maybe it was time she did.
Suddenly you find yourself
"I thought of you, too, that night," he confessed, unsure of his words. "You were all I thought about. The way you looked like your heart had skipped two beats when I walked into Kelly's. The way you watched me while your sister droned on about her medical school, as if we were the only two in the diner. The way you came up to me at Carly's party, ready for anything. The way y-you t-touched me that night." He stopped, had to catch his breath. "The way you told me it was me you wanted."
Her back was still to him. She hadn't moved. Try as she would, she couldn't say a word. What was she doing? She was walking away from this? What was wrong with her? Running away – from him? No, she was doing what she had to, trying to piece her life back together. Then why had everything suddenly become so complicated? All she had to do was be rude, piss him off, get him to leave, and she was home free. What had gone wrong? She had to stop this.
Suddenly you're in this fight
Steppin' out and then
"Things change," she replied softly.
His body jolted. "What?" he asked, his voice suddenly hard.
"Things change," she repeated, twisting around to face him. Quoting from an old song she always cried to, she continued, "You know, 'seasons change and so did I. You need not wonder why'."
"What the # is that supposed to mean?"
"It means that no one knows what I want," she spit out, pointing a finger at herself. "Least of all me."
"What do you think you want?"
"I want out." Her answer came with alarming swiftness. "I want to get out of this sham of a life I've somehow created for myself. I want to go back to being the real Elizabeth Webber. The one that knew what she wanted in life, and knew which people she wanted in her life. The one that was independent and competent. She knew where she was going, and I would kill for that knowledge. Her friends were a reflection of herself, and she always fought tooth and nail for them, because they were worth it. She stood by them and they stood by her. That Elizabeth knew that blood wasn't everything, and she made close friends and alliances everywhere she went. She didn't need anyone to save her; she knew how to save herself. She was the best person I knew, and I feel like I've lost her forever. Only I'm determined to find her again, no matter what the cost. Because I need her."
His mind was spinning. He didn't really know why she kept referring to herself in the third person, and he didn't understand what she meant by 'finding her'. But he knew one thing. "Why couldn't you find her here? Why does this seem like another attempt at running away?"
"Running away is the last thing I'm doing," she retorted, clenching her fists. "I'm not running from anything. I'm running towards something. Everything."
Once again, it flew straight over his head. It was like she'd taken them back to square one. "That doesn't make sense, Elizabeth," he began, gritting his teeth. "You're trying to prove a point that no one gets and one no one will ever get-"
"Stop saying that!" she screamed, covering her ears. Her anger came through, unbridled and unchecked. "Why does everyone say that? You might as well tattoo it to your forehead! Why is it so easy to assume that little Lizzie is misguided and childish and just trying to gain attention? Why is it so easy to assume that I'm out to hurt my friends and family any way I can? Is it so impossible that I might actually be doing something for myself? That this isn't about anyone else? This is about me, damn it!"
Her face was flushed and her eyes were wet, still blazing with anger and resentment. Inside himself, Jason could feel his own anger flare up.
"That's right, Elizabeth," he sneered, crossing his arms defensively. "After all, you are the most unselfish person I know."
Her jaw dropped. She wanted to claw his damn eyeballs out. And to think, just moments ago, this conversation was completely different.
Suddenly you're in this fight alone
Steppin' out into the great unknown
But she had gotten what she wanted, hadn't she? She had wanted a clean break. And now was the time to seize it.
"Whatever you say, Morgan," she got out. She readjusted her purse, fumbling with the clasp. "I'm going to be leaving now."
Jason scoffed. This was so like her. Just shut off the emotion and make her getaway when things got tough. And the worst part was that he couldn't even read her eyes, something he had always prided herself in.
"I hope you and your brother's wife have a very nice life together. You both deserve each other. And one more thing. I already cleaned up my studio, but I left two things there. I'd appreciate it if you could go there and get that painting of yours. It's on the floor. Then open the closet, and you'll see a slim box, wrapped in red paper with a pink bow. Take it and give it to Carly. Not to worry," she added when she saw his eyes narrow. "It's not a bomb. It's a quilt. I made it for my child a long time ago, but I want Carly to have it for her girl."
"Morgan."
"That's the name?" When Jason nodded, Elizabeth continued. "Morgan Corinthos," she mused, a finger on her chin. "I bet that's the only time you'll ever see the name Morgan before the name Corinthos."
"Har har."
"What are they doing now?" came a hushed whisper from behind the bushes. All three bodyguards were sitting in the dirt, smudging their pressed suits.
Francis shoved Johnny. "Shut thefuck up," he growled. "You made me miss it."
"I heard," replied Max. "She said that the baby's name was the only time you'd see Morgan before Corinthos."
"Ouch," answered Johnny and Francis, sucking in a breath. "Harsh."
"True, though."
"Yeah."
All three men quieted down and resumed watching, too engrossed in the scene before them to notice that someone else was crawling around in the bushes near them.
The man shifted his weight quietly, not wanting to disturb the guards. He leapt silently, cat-like, behind a tree, gripping the trunk like a lifeline with his pale, trembling hands. He then jumped behind the hedges, trying to put some distance between himself and Morgan's companions.
Stupid enforcer. He just had to bring those three along. Alcazar would not be pleased: the arrangement was only for Morgan to come. Then a quick two bullets in the head, and a clean getaway. Blame it on some street thug misfiring his stolen weapon. Two bullets, no chances. Everything was supposed to go down smoothly, no complications.
Until the guards came along, and until he heard that patrol car in the distance. And the girl.
He had heard about her. She was a young artist, and lived in Port Charles for most of her life. Her grandmother worked at General Hospital for decades, and until recently, the young woman was married to Ric Lansing, his boss' business associate.
Associate.
What a funny word for a guy you play like a puppet.
While he knew there was no love lost between Mr. Alcazar and Lansing, he also knew that the boss had a soft spot for the ex-Mrs. Lansing. She was described as a "spunky kid", and if there was one thing Lorenzo admired, it was courageous, take-no-# women.
And if the way she was taking Morgan's ass to the cleaners was any indication, this young woman had spunk to spare.
But regardless, she wasn't supposed to be here. Fortunately, she looked as if she'd give anything to leave, and he decided to just bide his time. If she was smart, she'd leave within the next ten minutes. That was when his time was up, and the boss would be checking up on him. And he'd be plenty upset if he found the task at hand wasn't completed.
He reached the other side of the little clearing, grateful to be away from the peanut gallery. He fiddled with his pistol, already loaded with the safety off. He had a job to do, and come rain or shine or Lizzie Webber, he was going to do it.
If she was smart, she'd get her pretty little ass the hell away from Morgan.
Nice going, Webber, she smiled inwardly. Now was the perfect time to break away and leave. For all her garrulity and rashness, she sure knew how to create an exit for herself.
She was about to open her mouth to tell Morgan she hoped he had a nice life when she heard some quiet rustling in the bushes. Not wanting to cry wolf, she quickly glanced at Jason to see if he had heard something, too.
He had.
His face showed it. He knew it could be the guards, who were undoubtedly recording this conversation for their own listening pleasure, not to mention blackmail, but it didn't seem likely. Besides, the way he was standing, he knew the guards were in the bushes right in front of him. And he knew for a fact that noise didn't come from that direction.
And the night's the hardest time
When the doubts run through your mind
"Did you hear what I think I heard?" she asked quietly, glancing warily at the foliage.
"Shh," was all she got in reply. Jason's eyes were darting from one bush to the other, his muscles tense. Whatever it was, Mighty Morgan didn't like it. Mighty Morgan was spooked..
Had the circumstances been different, she would have laughed aloud at the thought. But right now, she wanted to run. She had well fulfilled her quota of 'scary park visits', and she just wanted to leave. It was a stupid idea to even come here in the first place.
They had to leave. This was freaking ridiculous. All five of them were standing around in a dark area of the park at night. It was practically the next morning. The park was no place to be at night. She should know.
She turned quickly to face him, startled at how close he was to her. Her sudden motion had sent her crashing into his side, and he wrapped a strong arm around her waist to steady her.
As soon as he had grabbed her he let her go, taking two steps back. He could see she wanted to tell him something, but he kept his eyes trained on the bushes around them. He had to get them out of here. For a man who wasn't spooked easily, he had a bad feeling about this. It may not have been anything, but he had learned to always trust his instincts. They had never led him astray. Except for when they let her walk away from him, but he couldn't think about that right now.
"Jason?"
Her soft voice was the last thing he heard before all hell broke loose.
The next instant, a blazing roar came from the bushes, a trail of fire that illuminated the night and blinded him. The trail seared through the night air, and he realized too late that it was a bullet. Aimed right for where they were standing.
He saw that it wasn't going to hit remotely near Elizabeth, but he realized too late that it was going to get him. And get him it did.
The bullet crashed into his body, tearing a neat hole in his leather jacket. His pain brought white flashes to his eyes as he felt the foreign object enter his body. And then leave through the opposite side.
He had been shot. And he hadn't even seen it coming.
'Cause suddenly you find yourself alone
Suddenly you find yourself
He heard Elizabeth shriek as he fell, crashing to his knees. His thighs and knees buckled under the weight of his body, and he folded over, crashing into the soft cool grass on his side.
His men had run up to him as soon as the gun went off, Johnny and Max pointing their guns into the bushes, ready to fire at the slightest sign of movement, while Francis stripped the leather jacket off his body. He swore when he saw the bullet wounds. There was so much blood. Just pouring, effusing out of him. His life was slowly pouring out of his body.
Francis gritted his teeth and whipped out his pocketknife, cutting away at the seams of Jason's tee-shirt, ready to apply pressure to the wound while Johnny called for help.
Elizabeth had sank to the floor next to him, anxiously ripping the shirt away from Jason's body. Her hands were shaking and her breathing was erratic, and Francis sensed she might go into shock soon. He had to get her out of here before she saw too much.
Looking into Jason's glazed eyes, he knew his boss had the exact same idea. As Francis tore off his own sleeve to make a makeshift bandage, Jason struggled to speak.
"Elizabeth-" he croaked, trying to sit up before Francis gently forced him down.
"I'm right here," she cried, latching onto one of his hands. Her cold fingers caressed his large hands, trying to soothe him when he felt her own frantic pulse.
"You have to leave."
It wasn't a request, it was an order. There was no arguing with that voice, or the look in his eyes. But she had to try.
"Jason, I can't-"
"You have to. Leave."
"But-"
"Leave. Now." He said no more, slowly closing his eyes as Elizabeth struggled with her conscience.
She was there the last time this happened. How could she leave him now?
Suddenly you're in this fight alone
Steppin' out into the great unknown
She stood up. There was no place for her here. Francis was administering emergency medical relief as she watched, and Johnny had already called their doctor.
As she looked back at Johnny and Max, she saw they had caught a man in a ski mask, clutching a gun to his chest. When had that happened? Why hadn't she noticed? She watched deftly as Max knocked the man's pistol away while Johnny slammed his back against a tree, demanding to know if he worked for Lorenzo Alcazar. As she watched, the man produced a small handgun from his sleeve and shot himself in the mouth.
And that was it. It was over.
But where would that leave Jason?
She turned. She had to leave. They all wanted her away. She had to go. She'd sit on the side, tucked away in the bushes, until the doctors came. Then, when she knew he was going to be fine, she'd leave. She was just getting in the way here.
Even as she tried to convince herself, she knew she should stay. She had to stay. It was impossible for her heart to consider anything else. But as if of their own volition, her legs forced her to walk away. She slipped quietly away, making it past the trees and bushes. But she didn't stop. She just kept on going, not looking back.
And the night's the hardest time
He watched her go. He could feel Francis' fingers tickling him at his sides, he could hear Johnny roar in frustration as the gun went off, he could smell the smoke in the air. But all he could see was her. Walking away from him.
And that was the way it had to be.
Wasn't it?
Yes. She had to leave. She couldn't get mixed up in this. Lord knows she had been mixed up in enough things to last a lifetime. She was going to start a new life now, and he couldn't take that away from her. He couldn't tie her back to the town she so desperately wanted to leave. Even if he was lying bleeding on the ground, just as he had been so many years ago.
She had saved him then. It was unfair of him to ask her to do the same now. So much bad blood had been exchanged; what made him so sure she even wanted to save him now?
So he lay there and watched her leave.
When the doubts run through your mind
'Cause suddenly you find yourself alone
She kept walking, purse flapping behind her, sandals swaying from her fingers, looking only straight ahead. She half-walked half-stumbled through the overgrown pathway that would lead her back to her car, ignoring the pricks of brief pain as her delicate feet stepped over pebbles and sharp twigs.
She had to get out. She couldn't do this anymore. She'd be damned if she did.
She parted the tree branches with a trembling hand, relieved to finally see the parking lot. Her car stood nearby, just as she had left it.
She stopped, staring at it. It didn't look the same. She didn't get the same feeling inside when she looked at it.
Before, her car seemed so warm and enthusiastic, as ready to hit the highway and spread its wings as she was. The soft sheep wool seat covers called out to her, imploring her to settle deep into their comfort and warmth. Her car made promises of the great unknown, promises of security and adventure at the same time. Even though she had just purchased it, she trusted her car.
Now it looked completely different. The soft blue seemed to bleed into the night, the healthy shine dulled in the dark. It no longer looked warm and inviting. It looked like a cold piece of metal. Cold and hard. But still reliable. Even though its image had changed so drastically in her mind, she knew that the car could still take her anywhere she wanted to go.
Where did she want to go?
She stepped onto the pavement, her feet relieved to find themselves on a smooth cool surface. She tried to force herself forward, tried to will herself to run to her prized vehicle, slide the key into the ignition and take off into the wild night. But she didn't know where.
Where did she want to go?
She spun around, her feet leaping off the safe pavement into the thorny wilderness. Finally, her heart had regained control of her body.
She ran wildly through the night, the loud wail of a police siren floating to her ears. Damn. The nearby patrol car had heard the multiple gunshots. Now it was even more important to get back: she'd probably be the only objective witness in the cops' eyes.
She flung her shoes away, dropping her purse at the same spot. She ran free, her long strides swallowing up the distance. She ran as if her life depended on it, and in a sense, it did.
Hold on. I'm coming. Just hold on for me.
He lay still, not paying attention to the mêlée around him. The cops had shown up, as he had a feeling they would. Two cars had just pulled up, and he could hear a third on its way. Johnny and Max stood still, awaiting the coppers and the barrage of questions that would come with them. They had lain the dead gunman's body on the ground before them, not bothering to dispose of it since the evidence was so plain. One gun, with only the man's fingerprints on it. A bullet from that gun lodged in the back of his head. It couldn't get much simpler.
Only Francis paid no attention to the new arrivals, still attacking Jason's wounds feverishly. He had succeeded in stopping most of the blood, but Jason had already lost so much. Now his only responsibility was to keep his friend alive.
A crash in the thicket startled the men. Johnny and Max turned to gape in its direction, while Francis kept his head bent, his fingers flying.
Elizabeth emerged from the trees, a leaf in her hair and additional smudges on her body. Her purse and shoes were absent, and as all of the gathered men watched, she shot across the grass and fell to her knees behind Jason.
Francis looked up, startled, then looked down once more when Elizabeth shot him a quick smile.
He knew she'd come. No matter what they'd said, he knew she wouldn't be able to stay away. It was humanly impossible for her.
A paramedic grabbed his shoulder and Francis stood up, wiping Jason's blood on his trousers. He'd done all he could do. Now it was completely in the hands of the professionals. And her.
He watched as she knelt beside him, unmindful of the paramedics barking orders at each other. She softly smoothed her fingers through his hair, whispering nonsensical words into his ear.
Jason opened his eyes slowly and Elizabeth leaned over his body to show him her face, a brave smile gracing her countenance. She threaded her free hand with his, smiling wider when he clasped it with as much strength as he could.
He took her in. His blue eyes moved up and down her face, stopping to read her eyes. They were an open book to him. Without even having to ask – which was good, because he couldn't – he knew what she was feeling, and why she was back with him. A soft sigh escaped his lips and he closed his eyes once more, feeling the presence of the paramedics.
"You're going to be okay, Jason. We're all going to be okay."
He concentrated on her voice, almost not hearing the paramedic when he said, "Mr. Morgan, we will be taking you to General Hospital immediately."
Elizabeth stayed by his side as the paramedics readied the stretcher. They barked out last-minute orders, but she didn't hear anything.
All she heard was his soft breathing, all she felt was his racing heart. All she saw was him.
She had started out her evening wondering where she was going. She knew that now. She had started out wondering who she was. She knew that now, too.
She was what she had always been.
She was his savior.
Suddenly I found myself.
Fin.