Disclaimer: I own a house and I have friends, but I don't own House, MD or Friends.
A/N: This story will make more sense if you are familiar with the show Friends, but if you're not, I think I have explained the parts that are important to the story. The episode they are watching is 2.14 The One with the Prom Video. Thanks for reading!
The One with the Episode of Friends
"Oh hey, you're still here," Allison Cameron says as she walks into Gregory House's darkened office and finds him sitting in front of the flickering television. "I was just coming to leave you a note about Mr. Silverman." He looks at her blankly. "You know, the guy from the ER this morning who… Oh, Friends!" she exclaims, noticing what's playing on the television, just as he is about to change the channel. "No! Don't change it." Cameron plucks the remote out of his hand and plops down on the floor next to his chair. "It's The One with the Prom Video; I love this episode! "
"Hey, mine!" He makes a grab for the remote control but she holds it just out of his reach.
"Shh…I'm trying to watch this!" she says. Whatever, he thinks and settles back in his chair.
On the television, a blonde woman is talking about lobsters mating for life and walking around their tank holding claws. House tilts his head and looks at Cameron in confusion.
"So," he asks, "who are these people and why are they talking about lobsters?"
"Um, what!? You, Mr. Pop Culture, have never watched Friends? It's way better than the crap you watch. You don't know what you're missing!"
"I can't. Jennifer Aniston's in it. It would be disloyal to Angelina to watch Jen's show," House explains, as if this should be obvious.
"Right," Cameron scoffs, shaking her head. "Well anyway, Jen is Rachel and that guy there is Ross. They had a thing for each other, but he messed up and hurt her and so it didn't go anywhere. He still wants her, but now she's being too stubborn to admit that she still cares about him," she summarizes for him. "The blonde girl is Phoebe. She's trying to reassure Ross that Rachel will eventually come around because they are like lobsters…mated for life."
House thinks to himself that this Rachel probably has the right idea. Why should she open herself up only to be hurt again?
"And no, she does not have the right idea, House." He looks down at her, startled and somewhat impressed that she can read him so well.
"So is that how you see Chase?" he questions. "As your lobster?" He wonders if he really wants to hear the answer to that question.
"Ha! Chase is so not my lobster! Actually, Chase isn't my anything anymore. We broke up a few days ago."
"Huh. How did I miss that bit of hospital gossip?" he wonders aloud.
"I don't know. Guess you're slipping, old man," she teases.
"Or maybe it just wasn't important enough for me to take notice," he shoots back.
"Riiight," she says, favoring him with a knowing grin before turning back to the television. They continue to watch in a companionable silence that is broken only by Cameron's bursts of laughter and House's not-quite-stifled chuckles.
"You okay? With the Chase thing?" he asks suddenly, and she is surprised at the note of protectiveness she detects in his gruff voice.
"I'm fine," she answers. "It was coming on for quite awhile. Like I said, he's not my lobster." She shrugs.
House feels oddly relieved. He ponders this whole lobster concept. Is there really one perfect person for everyone? Was his…Stacy? That can't be right, he thinks. One lobster wouldn't pinch off another lobster's leg would it? No, he decides, definitely not Stacy. He looks at the woman seated on the floor beside him and wonders… and then shakes his head at the foolish direction his thoughts have gone in. Cameron notices this. "What are you smirking about?" she asks.
"Duh, the show of course. Now shut up, I'm trying to watch this."
The show is nearing its conclusion when Cameron's pager goes off. "Damn. Car accident. Gotta run." She gets up, sets the remote on the ottoman, and heads for the door.
"Hey," he says, suddenly remembering her reason for coming in. "What were you going to tell me…you know, about what's his name from the ER this morning?"
She pauses and turns back to face him. "Oh…nothing important. This was fun," she says softly, flashing him a smile before continuing on her way. He grumbles something about that being a matter of opinion as he watches her disappear down the hall. He turns back to the television. Ross and Rachel are kissing. "See, he's her lobster," he murmurs along with Phoebe. Rolling his eyes at himself, he sighs, grabs the remote and clicks off the TV.
The End