"What in the nine realms is that?"
"It's a kitten." Darcy held up the offending mammal in question. "See?"
Loki sighed and stepped away from her outstretched arms. "I see that, thank you. Why do you have it?"
A wicked smile twisted Darcy's lips. Lips, incidentally, that Loki was having a hard time not focusing on. "It's for you."
"I beg your pardon?"
"I got you a kitten. Here, hold it!"
Loki let out a strangled sort of sound as Darcy deposited the kitten into his arms. "I don't - "
"He even kind of looks like you!"
"Forgive me if I disagree," Loki replied, his upper lip curling in disdain as he held the kitten up to eye level.
Darcy rolled her eyes. "No, dummy, he has your color scheme." She pointed to the feline's glossy black fur and mismatched eyes. "The gold and green, I mean."
"That is hardly gold," Loki sniffed. The kitten blinked one yellow eye at him. "It is a mediocre attempt at gold at best."
"Whatever," said Darcy, throwing herself onto the couch. "Anyway, what are you going to name him?"
"I doubt it cares whether it has a name or not."
Darcy whirled around to face him, her eyes narrowed. "I don't think you heard me," she said, her voice low and menacing. "I said, what are you going to name him?"
Loki set his mouth into a hard line. "Fine," he said at last, sitting beside Darcy. He settled the cat into his lap. "Fine." Darcy reached over to pass a hand over the kitten's head. It began to purr and nuzzled Darcy's palm. "Freyja."
"That's a girl's name. He's a boy."
"Really?" Loki held the kitten up and peered closer at its lower body. "Ah. Then Jormungandr."
"Ew."
"Kolr."
Darcy opened her mouth as if to argue, and then stopped and tilted her head to the side, considering. "Hm. What's it mean?"
"Coal."
She snorted. "You're so unoriginal," she said, but did not press the matter further.
For some reason, I feel the need to incorporate kittens into all of my fanfictions. I think I have a problem. Before I know it, this is going to escalate into a fic the same scale as my "In Which Gold Rescues a Kitten" fic.
Oh dear lord, somebody stop me.
(I am such a diehard Loki/Darcy shipper. My ship name for them is Doki. Which is great, because they make my heart go doki doki.)