I do not own RWBY or any of these characters. They are a creation of Rooster Teeth and the visionary Monty Oum, may he rest in peace.

I guarantee no expertise in Romance, dates, acting cute, upper-class family expectations, or manifestations of casual racism.

Assume that Qrow didn't intercept Winter when she stopped by in Season 3.

Nothing I write will ever fully encapsulate the sublime, multifaceted resplendence of the Monochrome Ship, but here's something trying to work a lighter version of the 'star-crossed interracial lovers' angle.

Originally posted on Ao3.

-OOO-

It was the end of her first year away from home, during the start of the Vytal festival, and Weiss already had a lot on her plate. And now she had to deal with this.

Weiss hoped her nervousness didn't show. She'd quickly brushed off her dress, she'd made sure her posture was perfect and her hair was perfect and her diction and eye contact were perfect. Nothing intimidated a Schnee, after all.

Except, perhaps, another Schnee.

"Did you even make any friends during your year here?" said Weiss's sister.

"Of course." Weiss said.

Winter raised an eyebrow. "Name one."

"Ruby," Weiss said, "We're the best of friends."

"Right," Winter said. She sounded incredulous. She took a moment to examine her nails, looking at Weiss from the corner of her eye. "What's her last name?" This was a test.

"Rose." Haha, easy.

"And her favorite color?"

"Blood red." Also- easy?

"Favorite food?"

"Cookies." Duh.

Weiss blinked a couple times and smiled, hoping this was enough to appease her sister.

"What's your favorite activity to do together?"

Crap. "...Dueling practice?"

"Excellent!" Winter said loudly. She patted Weiss's shoulder. "You've finally made a friend!"

Weiss knew Winter was being condescending, but she couldn't help but beam inside. For whatever reason, she valued her sister's opinion.

"But you could have made a single friend in Atlas," Winter chided.

"I-I have more friends!"

"Yeah?"

"There's Yang! We're, like, two peas in a pod. We have the same taste in music."

Winter relaxed. "Well, two friends is two more than we'd expected." Winter smiled. "Glad to see you've overcome that antisocial streak. Maybe you'll overcome some other bad habits as well..."

Weiss forced herself to be calm. "I told you, my homosexuality is not a phase-"

"Don't take that tone with me, Weiss," Winter said. "If you are correct, then the facts will be sufficient proof. There is never a good reason to mouth off to me."

Weiss folded her arms and frowned to the distance. She'd had this argument all too many times before.

Winter sighed. "You're not still hung up on that, are you? You may of course fool around with whomever you wish, but when the time comes to continue the Schnee lineage, it'll be much less expensive if we don't have to do the science baby thing."

Weiss's cheeks tinted slightly. That was a duty she hoped to put off as long as possible.

"I'm just saying," Winter pontificated. "How do you really know you're gay if you haven't had a girlfriend?"

"Well, actually..." Weiss began. She had the inklings of a crazy, stupid idea.

"Argh!" Weiss said as she opened the door to her room. She'd have to be quick; Winter expected her back within the hour. She turned to the blond and red-haired members of her team. "Ruby, Yang, I don't know how you do it."

Ruby was currently oiling her weapon. Yang was playing a game on her scroll. "Do what?" said Yang.

"How do you two manage to get along?"

Ruby gazed impassively at Yang. Yang blinked a couple times at Ruby. Both of them turned to Weiss, and then back to each other. Then Yang giggled and Ruby chortled.

"Badly, sometimes," Yang joked.

"Yang consumed the last cookie at Nora and Ren's birthday party, two weeks ago." Ruby intoned facetiously.

"They were bad cookies. I was saving you from them."

"Right after you also devoured the last brownie."

Yang smiled a huge smile. "Those were very bad brownies. I had to slay them all."

Ruby and Yang started making faces at each other. Weiss made a face of her own.

"So," Weiss folded her arms. "Do either of you know where Blake is-"

"Hey," said a voice from behind her.

Weiss flinched. Normally she'd be used to Blake dropping in like this, but the surprise visit from her sister had set her on edge.

Blake looked as powerful as ever- slouched slightly; ready to pounce, eyes lidded to give the impression (an incorrect impression, as Weiss learned) of inattentiveness. She flexed her muscles as she waited.

"I-" Weiss bit her lip. "I have a huge favor to ask you, Blake." And it had to be Blake, Weiss told herself. She'd already told Winter that she was friends with Ruby and Yang.

"Alright," Blake said. "Let's hear it."

Weiss bit her cheek. Between the quiet bookworm, the rambunctious party girl and the supersonic rose-flurried fatalistic scythe-reaping goth cookie-monster, Blake seemed like the most presentable one of her friends, "S-so, we've been getting along better recently..."

Blake shrugged.

"And you're good at acting, right?" Weiss had just remembered Blake's history. As long as none of that came up, nobody should get killed in a rekindled grudge fight.

Blake's nostrils flared. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"I- I meant, you've hidden that you're Faunus from everyone-"

"Because I was afraid of what people like you would do if they found out!"

"Well," Yang said, "She didn't really hide it that successfully."

"But don't forget," Ruby lamented at Weiss, "Blake also acted like she didn't hate your guts for like a whole semester."

"Maybe she's still acting!?" Yang added.

"Ohhh!" Ruby and Yang pointed at each other.

Weiss glared at the two of them for a moment. "Thanks, you assholes."

Ruby flashed her tombstone teeth. "No problem!" she said as cheerily as she could.

Blake had taken ten breaths at this point. "Don't worry; that's not true," she said to Weiss. Then Blake mumbled something. "So what's this all about, then?" Blake finished.

"Well uh," Weiss began. It took her entirely too long to say the next part, "I have a sister."

Yang and Ruby gave a collective "What?"

"I know," Blake said.

Weiss scratched the back of her head. "Yeah, a while back you tried to have her assassinated-"

"I never tried to have her assassinated!" Blake yelled. She took a step towards Weiss. "Do you- Do you really think of me that way?"

Weiss's throat caught. "Blake, I'm sorry-"

Blake touched her forehead. "No, I should be sorry. You're trying, and that's-" Blake bit her lip. "That's better than a lot of humans."

Blake smiled apologetically, and Weiss shot a forgiving smile her way. It was cool how they were close enough that they could communicate non-verbally, Weiss thought.

"So what did you need, and what does this have to do with your sister?" Blake said.

Weiss took a long breath. At first, she couldn't make eye contact with Blake, but she found the courage to do so at the third try. "I need you to pretend to be my girlfriend."

Blake's eye twitched as the rest of her froze.

"What?" Blake managed to say, eventually.

Ruby and Yang laughed their respective laughs, the assholes. Weiss flushed a little and decided to ignore them.

"Just- for this afternoon, just until Winter leaves tomorrow-"

Blake's eye twitched some more. Her cheeks were tinting. "W-why do you need me to do it?"

Weiss's expression flattened and she gestured to their other teammates.

"C'mon," Blake said weakly, "Ruby's not that messy-"

Ruby had cut herself on her scythe at some point, and some blood mingled with the oil and cookie crumbs on her face when she tried to wipe away a laugh-tear.

"And Yang's only slightly inebriated-"

Yang had fallen off her bunk laughing.

Blake's neck shivered a little. "Maybe we can sedate Nora down to normal levels?"

"That'd only make her more powerful in the long run."

"Or we could squeeze Juane into a dress?"

"He only does that for Pyrrha."

"Hey, speaking of which-"

"She's too famous. Winter'll know."

Blake shuffled uncomfortably. There was now definitely a blush on her face.

"I'll get you anything you like?" Weiss pleaded.

"I-I don't want anything-" Blake stammered.

"Please?"

"I-"

"Pretty Please?"

Blake threw down a smoke bomb.

A few minutes later, Weiss finished coughing and the smoke cleared. Blake was gone.

"Ah, Ninja's amirite?" Ruby chuckled hopelessly, "You just can't make them stay."

It was a nice autumn afternoon; the leaves were rustling, the sun was out, the bustle of attendees at the fair hummed in the background. Not cold enough for a Schnee to be completely comfortable but not unpleasantly warm.

It wasn't enough to completely calm down Weiss as she met her sister for tea. Weiss was certain her voice cracked when they sat down and exchanged pleasantries, and she tried to maintain the illusion of attentiveness as Winter remarked on all the things she decided she disliked about Beacon.

"So," Winter said at some point, "About that girlfriend."

"Yeah, um, about that girlfriend?" Weiss said. She slumped into her shoulder-blades.

Winter raised an eyebrow.

"I- I might have been a little dishonest about the whole situation-" Weiss said.

Winter sighed that big, piercingly disappointed sigh. "Weiss, did you actually lie to me?"

"I- no!" Weiss said reflexively. She wished she could throw down her own smoke bomb right about now. "I mean-"

"Weiss-y-poo!" said a cutesy contralto voice in the distance. Weiss reflexively straightened her posture at the sound of her name. It took Weiss a moment to realize the voice belonged to Blake-

Who was running towards them, one hand holding a wide-brimmed sunhat (with holes in which her adorable ears poked out) to her head, the other clutching a purse.

And Blake was dressed in a stunning black sundress; wide sleeved and low cut, showing off the muscle tone in her shoulders but covering up the worst of her scars.

Weiss realized her mouth was hanging open.

"Sorry I'm late!" Blake cooed. She walked up to their table and hugged Weiss's head, rubbing her cheek on Weiss's now beet-red forehead. "Sweetie-pie."

Weiss was too … something to respond.

"Weiss!" said Winter. It broke Weiss out of her reverie. "I'm ashamed of you."

"W-what?" Weiss's heart sank in reflex. What'd she do?

"You didn't think I'd like your girlfriend just because she's a Faunus? Not all of them are like the White Fang, you know."

This time it was Blake who froze, just for a moment. She then laughed awkwardly.

"Oh. Um." Weiss said.

Then suddenly Winter was all smiles. She stood up out of her chair and walked up to and held a hand out to Blake. "We have one of you people running a plant on the western side of the continent. She's very hardworking!"

"Oh!" Blake only took a moment to take Winter's hands in both her own. "Ahahaha."

"I'm Winter, but I'm sure Weiss has mentioned me." Winter smiled. "What's your name?"

Blake refreshed her smile. "Blake. Blake Belladonna."

"Oh, Faunus have the loveliest names."

"Oh! Um, thank you!"

"No, thank you for dating my sister! It's about time she's found somebody, aha."

Weiss chuckled awkwardly.

"About that- I'm really, really super sorry," Blake said incredibly adorably (as in, literally incredibly), in a way that made Weiss's heart skip a beat and her breath catch. "But Weiss-y promised me she'd take me to the fair today."

Winter turned to her sister. "Weiss!" she said disapprovingly, menacingly. Weiss flinched out of habit. "Did you schedule a date just to get out of meeting with me?"

"Uh- I-"

"That's profoundly disrespectful, Weiss. I expected better from you."

"I- I'm sorry, Winter." Weiss said to her hands.

Winter shot Weiss a parting glare before she refreshed her smile back at Blake.

"And I apologize, Ms. Belladonna," Winter said, "But I'm only in town for the day and I really need to catch up with my beloved sister." Winter opened her purse. "How much to reimburse you for your afternoon?"

"But," pouted Blake, "Weiss-y pwomised." The pout and kitty-eyes were aimed at Winter, but Weiss got caught in the blast radius; she felt a shiver travel outward from her heart and shudder into every centimeter of her aching body.

Winter almost pouted in sympathy. She cleared her throat. "Tell you what," Winter said, "Why don't I take you both to the fair today? You can still get some quality time together and I'll catch up with Weiss on the in-between times. I'll pay for everything, of course." Winter stood up. "Including our tea, which I'll do so now, so we can get started." She gestured to the table before walking off towards the cashier.

Blake took a seat to rest. She smiled as Winter left, eyes closed and cheeks clenched.

Weiss leaned in so that only her 'date' could hear. "Why'd you tell her I tried to ditch her?" Weiss whispered as harshly as she could.

Blake's face transformed from cutesy-boop to unbridled rage in a blink. "You're mad at me?! I was trying to get you out of this!"

"You idiot! She already suspects something's up with me!"

"I don't see how you've got the short end here," Blake seethed, "I just signed up to keep up this horrible facade for an entire afternoon."

"W- what's so bad about that?"

Blake's eyes widened and she grit her teeth harder. "Because you and her are freaking Sch-" Blake closed her eyes and breathed. Her eyes hadn't softened by the time she reopened them. "She's a money-grubbing, oblivious, narcissistic bigot, I don't actually like you, and by the end of the date I'm probably going to have to perform at least one smooch on your gross, stupid –snuggly wuggly face!"

Blake grabbed Weiss's head.

Weiss would later admonish herself for not realizing that, obviously, Winter had walked up just then and Blake was just acting, but in the moment she was a little stunned by the suddenness of Blake's persona change and the quickness of her pounce and also by the fact that Blake had just pulled Weiss in for a face full of cleavage.

Weiss was vaguely aware that her sister had said something through the thundering of her ears. Blake let her go, and Weiss managed to stay upright.

"So shall we get going? I think the aquarium's promising," Winter said.

Blake shot one last split-second death glare towards Weiss before her cutesy face reappeared. She held out her hand to Weiss. "C'mon, widdle Weiss-y?"

Weiss had to shake her head to regain herself. Weiss took Blake's hand and only squeaked a little when Blake squeezed it as hard as she could.