A/N: Based on the pillow conversation in the 4x04 deleted scene (which I will be forever grateful they released cause "Do your thing, babe" and "I will tell you what I would tell you a year from now, two years from now, twenty years from now).
I have received all your lovely reviews for my other stories, and I promise I will consider writing a continuation of Falling (my friend got me some ideas I feel I should explore).
I the meantime, I hope you like this!
There is that first night with the pillows. They come home, to the place that is now theirs. The case still lingering with them, their minds heavy with the fact that they just put away a kid. Jay is still battling with the image of the perp, who turned out to be nothing but a scared kid. A scared kid that started a gang war. Erin can't help but to go way back, thinking that could have been her all those years back, if Voight hadn't given her a chance to start over.
They take turns in the bathroom. Him before her, like almost always. In those four days of living together, they've somehow managed to strengthen the habits they had even before they moved in together, and so far, it's working well.
Jay is already in bed when she walks into the bedroom. He observes her with an amused smile as she jumps into the bed next to him. She scoots closer and wipes the smile off of his face with a kiss that could burn down the building. They both loose themselves in the passion, and manage to sooth each other like nothing else could.
It's not until much later, when she's lying in his arms completely happy, that she remembers her pillows and she goes to retrieve them from the closet, because she needs them, and besides he told her to do her thing. After she's done arranging them around her, and they are all in their respective places, he chuckles and somehow still manages to kiss her goodnight through all the pillows.
She wakes up one morning, days after that first day. He's propped up on his elbow; his eyes are drowsy with sleep and he is smiling at her from the other side of her "pillow wall". She thinks she can actually see the love he feels for her shining through, but it could just be the fact that the sun is leaking through the window. It's her favourite way to wake up lately, with him looking at her or even better, when she manages to wake up before him to be able to watch him sleep.
"Morning," she mumbles with a grin on her face. The pillows are suddenly just in the way, so she kicks them away, even throws one off the bed until she's able to pull him closer. His chest shakes when he chuckles at her attempts and she can feel it when she rests her head on his shoulder. He leans down to press a kiss on the top of her head, and it's their time. Before they head out for work, to the streets, to all the murders and evil. This is the time of the day when she's absolutely and blissfully happy.
Even without the pillows.
He eventually puts the pillows to good use one night. Erin is lying on the bed, waiting for him to join her. He lowers to kiss her, but his mouth is gone too soon. She groans at the loss of contact, until he starts pressing a line of soft kisses up her thighs. By this point, she knows where this is leading. Her hips raise in growing frustration.
Jay softly pushes one pillow beneath her bottom to make her comfortable, and continues his way up, until he finds her most sensitive spot.
She finds the use for another pillow moments later, when she digs her face into it to muffle her scream.
The pillows save her laptop one time. By that point Jay is beginning to see that the pillows aren't so bad at all. Erin is just finishing up some work with the laptop propped on her lap, two pillows already supporting her back several more waiting by her side. Somehow when he emerges from the bathroom with nothing but a towel wrapped around his waist, she manages to forget of the laptop in her lap. The laptop goes on its merry way down, and is stopped only by the pile of pillows.
She is smart enough, however, to put the laptop away before moving towards Jay in an attempt to remove the towel.
They start sharing a pillow. Somehow, when Erin turns away from him, the pillow meant for her knee wanders off to rest under his leg and stays there for the rest of the night. Jay is usually awake before her, and he always pushes the pillow back, so Erin wouldn't accuse him of stealing her pillows. He wouldn't even dream of admitting it to her, but he does find it oddly amusing.
It isn't until one night, she turns around again, and her leg is missing a pillow. Her eyes open slightly as she searches for it with her hand, but Jay's leg is heavy on it, so she just throws one leg over his and apparently it's good enough because she drifts back to sleep in second.
He's dreaming of her. And it's not the pleasant kind of dream. It's the familiar story, the one that really happened, the one in which Erin is on a bed, with a knife pointed to her throat.
He doesn't make it in time in his dream.
He wakes up with a start and he feels a sudden urge to feel her next to him. He knows she's there, sleeping, breathing, because luckily, he did come in time. But what should be completely rational, turns into a paranoia in the middle of night and his hands reach out for her.
Instead they find pillows. Lots of pillows.
"Fuck it," he murmurs so softly, she doesn't even wake as he throws the chest one back over his head, and the knee one into an opposite direction. He hears a soft thump when they land on the floor. She wakes when he pulls her against him, but doesn't mind at all. She snuggles against his chest and the steady beating of his heart makes her drift back soon. He lays there for a while, not exactly asleep, but allowing himself to get lost in her warmth and the soft tickle of her breath on his neck.
The last coherent thought she has before falling asleep again is that at the end of the day, Jay is the best pillow there is.