When I was offered this opportunity, I was incredibly excited. To be able to do this, to be able to see them. I knew that wasn't really the whole reason, but I felt like "if my brother can do it, so can I". Little did I know, I was going to regret it so quickly.
So here I am, sitting in "the Dean's" waiting room and trying to suppress the urge to run away. I'm just wondering if they'll recognize me. I think that is unlikely, though, because I've dyed my hair a really icky orange, and, of course, they don't know me anyway.
"Lena?" I hear a voice and look up.
"Uh, yes?" I study the woman looking down at me and quickly rise.
"I'm really sorry. I have quite a bit of running around to do, so I'm going to have to get someone else to take you over to the girls' dorm."
"Oh, alright." I'm upset, but she's not the reason I'm here. I follow her out and look at the back of her head. My brother has hair that color. We walk down some steps toward a large expanse of grass. I never knew this place was so beautiful. Mrs. Fleming calls out to a good-looking boy who has his back turned to us.
"Oh, here's
Munchie! Hi." Munchie? I laugh inwardly as he asks her
not to call him munchie. Now as I see him close up, I recognize his
eyes and almost become afraid.
Mrs. Fleming
introduces me to him "Hamilton's my son." she replies, and asks him to
take me to my prospective school.
We walk a
bit. I get a couple long looks in while I'm sure he's not looking.
"So what's it like in L.A.?" He asks.
I look up, away from *him*, away from the person who would ruin my life. I babble a line from "The Way We Were", and old movie that I've only seen part of. Maybe that makes him ask me the next question.
"You like movies?"
"I mostly like
old movies." And he proceeds to tell me about some old drive-in.
OMG, is he trying to ask me out?
Then *she*
walks up and I want to reach out and grab her. To hug her and never
let go.
"Jake, this is . . . ." He starts.
"Lena!" I reach out one hand. Hamilton says stuff about me and *Jake* shakes my hand.
"We're going to the drive-in tomorrow night to see a movie. Do you want to come?" Please say yes, I silently pray. I haven't seen her in so long. She looks at Hamilton and he looks back. They're obviously in lust and I begin to doubt myself. Will my charade be enough? They're probably wondering why I'm looking so long at her, so I tell *Jake* that she looks like my ex-boyfriend.
"I hope that's a complement." She smiles, trying to look *macho*.
"It is." I assure her. Maybe she hasn't told him yet. I realize she hasn't when he stands really close to her and says that a lot of people say they look alike.
I almost laugh
out loud. They look nothing alike and I tell them that. I mean,
hello, you're a guy and she's a girl. But I don't say anything because
she's obviously waiting for the right time to break the news.
So he starts
toward the girls' dorms and before I follow, I ensure that she will be
coming to the movies with us the next night, throwing in the *fact* that
she looks like my ex-boyfriend again. I am just looking for a reason
to stare at her some more.
We babble
about junk until we get to my school, and this time he tells me he'll see
me tomorrow night. Eww, he really did ask me out. But I say:
"Sure, it'll be fun.
Jake, me, you." And I'm sure he mumbles:
"Yeah, Jake."
or something as I turn away and walk up the steps to the school.
******************************************************
Okay, here's
where I stop and explain myself. Any girl would take one look at
Hamilton and drop over from sheer exhilaration, but the thing is, he's
my dad. Yeah, and he just asked me out. How weird and gross is that?
And he ruined my mom's life, which makes him on my bad list. The
reason I want to spend more time with *Jake* is not that harboring same-sex
tendencies, but because she's my mom, whom I haven't seen in a long time.
And "Mrs. Fleming" is my grandmother, who is also spurned by my dad.
Part 2:
The drive-in is playing a strange movie that I've never even heard of and I'm not watching it anyway. I'm thinking of how to get mom and dad apart. I also stare at mom who looks at me making me look away in order not to look like I have a crush on her or something. As soon as she looks back at the screen, though, I look at her again.
"This movie is really romantic." I say. I haven't been watching it, but I want to get a response out of her. I want to hear her voice.
"The girl is a witch, it's creepy." She mumbles.
"It's about two people who fall for each other under the worst possible circumstances and they can't be together but decide to do it anyway." I babble because I want to keep looking at her. Dad says something about it being a full moon and I correct him, only because looking at my calender this afternoon told me it was tomorrow. He mumbles some remark that sounds a little tense.
"I'm gonna go and...get some jujubes." Mom gets up and walks in the direction of the snack bar.
"Ah, I thought he'd
never leave." I turn to dad, because now I know the approach I'm
going to use. I ask if maybe *Jake* likes me blah, blah, blah.
There's nothing like an actual girl to make guys jealous and crazy.
Well not that I want him to be any crazier than he is, but if I could just
split them up...Don't ask me why I didn't go for dad, I just thought it'd
be easier this way.
I ask him
to talk to *Jake* for me, stabbing the knife in farther.
"It's a bad idea." He replies, obviously jealous already. But of her or me?
"What? You talking to him, or us getting together?"
"I don't know. I just don't see it." He pouts, so I move to *Jake's* chair, pretending to be as annoyed as I really am. We sit there "watching" the movie and trying not to look at each other until mom comes back, complaining that their being out of jujubes. She sits between us and we both look at her. She seems really uncomfortable and looks at dad, then at the movie.
*******************************************************
My dad took
us away from her when I was 10. No word about where we were going,
he just packed us up while she was at work, and we took off. I had
to leave my friends, my dog and all my cool stuff. And he didn't
give me an explanation. I never got a chance to say goodbye to my
mother.
*******************************************************
Part 3.
"I don't think this is working. Neither of them sem interested in me." I whine to my brother. I have snuck into the boys' dorms to talk to him. "Maybe it's not such a good idea...like he said."
"He? Are you going to start listening to him now?" His blue eyes flash in anger.
"Well they seem really...uh...in love?"
"In love?" He raves. "He doesn't even know she's a chick! What is wrong with you?"
"Maybe he just thinks that he's gay." I sigh. Just the way he looks at her... "In that case...I really don't think I can split them up."
"Well, go to extremes! Do something bold! I've got plans."
"Oh...you and your plans. All you're doing is goofin' off. You haven't started anything!"
"What do you know?"
He stares at me intently, then takes a deep breath. "Look, we didn't
come all this way to fight with each other, did we? We could've done
that at home. Just try harder. Don't let their innocence fool
you."
"*She* is
innocent."
"Hmmm, well."
"Yeah. You just do what you just told me. I'm tired of doing all the work, but I'll try harder if you do, bro."
"Fine."
"Fine." We shake hands and I leave quietly back for the girls' school.
*******************************************
I didn't lie about living in L.A. We wouldn't have had access to the "time machine" if we didn't live in a huge place like that. In my time, pretty much anything is accessible–for a price.
I don't really remember how it was decided that we would go back in time for this *task*. There was this guy that Greg knew and they got to talking...I'm not sure if he was an inventor or a salesman or what. Either one, when Greg told me he was going back in time, I laughed in his face. The idea was so stupid. Then he just went and I didn't hear from him for a while.
When he knocked at my door a week later, claiming that he'd been to the year 2000, I didn't believe him. He was only away for a couple weeks, yet he insisted he had been there for a year. Why wasn't he gone longer? But time is a funny thing, and when *I* get home, only a few days will have passed.
He hadn't seen our dad except for a few minutes at a time, and mom hadn't been there at all. What he was doing there that year, I don't know...and he hasn't told me. Well, when he asked me to come with him this time, I quickly dyed my hair and hopped on the train to the year 2000.
Part 4
Not long after our "date"–though I'm not sure who was together on the date–I go to *Jakes* room. I want to see her and talk to her and maybe just try once more to get them to split up.
"Hey...Jake. Can I come in?" I ask
"Um, yeah, sure. So..." She seems somewhat strained, as if she and dad have had a fight or a talk or something. She tells me she thought that I was going back home by now. I inform her that I'm going to be staying at Rawley. Maybe it's a lie, maybe the truth. Depends on how this conversation goes. She tells me that's great.
"I just think we really connected," I reply, "and that since I'm going to be at Rawley, you'll remember me." I would've said that weather or not I was trying to break them up.
"Oh...uh...I will." She answers vaugely.
"Because I think you're really cool." She is. I think I've had this conversation with a "real" boy before. It ended up with me and him breaking up. He looked nothing like *Jake*.
She says she thinks I'm cool too and I tell her I hope we can hang out more. Then just looking at her, I know it's not going to happen, and either as a last grasping of straws or a kiss goodbye, I lean forward. She gets all freaked and backs up. I would too if some girl just suddenly wanted to kiss me. I was only going for the cheek.
"Oh, um, Lena.
This isn't gonna work." Can you say duh? But now she thinks
she's hurt my feelings. That's soooo sweet! "Oh, that's not
what I mean."
I'm already
moving toward the door, half embarrassed--half defeated. She tries
to tell me I'm beautiful, and I want to yell "Yeah! That's because
I look like you, mom!" But without thinking I blurt out:
"I should've
listened to Hamilton. He said this was a bad idea."
"He did?" She's confused.
"Yeah, I think he was jealous." I add.
"I guess he likes you." She still doesn't get it.
"No. I think he likes you." I turn away and walk out hearing her confused "What?" behind me. As she and I come out of the room, the guys–that were standing outside like dogs–begin to cheer. Oh yeah, we totally had sex in those 15-20 minutes we were alone! Guys are retarded. The funny thing is that she doesn't say anything and I turn the corner with their cheers ringing in my ears. Did I fail? Should I have tried harder? Or maybe they really were meant for each other. I'm so confused.
********************************************
"I'm going
to work the gay thing." Greg tells me later.
"How? They aren't even a couple." I roll my eyes.
"Well from what you said, it doesn't take a genius to figure out that they have something going on. It'll only be a matter of time. Thanks to you...."
"No. Don't put this all on me! I don't think anyone could've split those two up! Maybe this is all a dumb idea. We should just go back...."
"To what? To him moping around like the loser he is? To his erratic anger outbursts? They weren't meant to stay together and I am gonna make sure that happens sooner than later. There's less pain for all of us that way."
"Wow! You're really committed to this!"
"Yeah, and if you're not going to continue to help me, maybe you should just go home alone."
I had no answer for that. Did I want them apart or together? I didn't know now. Would I help them be a couple or help my brother like I had first planned? I already knew Greg was set on his path, but what was mine? TBC...