Kurt had found his savior.
Everyday, he would come home from school and read the Bible together with his father, Burt. Every second he passed felt much more meaningful and warm, now that he had accepted Jesus as his savior. Naturally, it wasn't easy to stop being gay, as it was the only way-of-life he had known until then.
But his family was really supporting. Not only his father, but also Finn and Carole. They shopped together for normal heterosexual clothes and gave most of his old gay clothes to various charities. Kurt had finally found his redemption.
But that was the easy part, as Jesus guided him through it. Now, Kurt was waiting outside the Home Economy classroom. While smoking just like a man, he looked through the window. There she was, Santana Lopez, the one girl he had resolved to marry and make a happy Christian family with.
Soon enough, the bell rang, and Santana stepped out, her hands intertwining with Brittany's. They both looked pretty happy together, although they knew about the sin they were commiting. Kurt approached them, and kissed Santana with passion and faith. It wasn't easy, as Santana was a bit taller than he was, but with the help of God, he felt like he was gliding.
Santana's eyes widened with shock, as were Brittany's. After the initial shock, however, Santana loosened up and began to accept the sweet lips of a newly converted Christian.
"Ah...is this how it feels to be heterosexual?"
Santana's eyes widened with shock and they looked glassy with tears. She slapped Brittany's hand sideways and spat on her for being a dirty sinner.
"I'm through with you!"
Santana took Kurt's hand and they walked away from Brittany. Before she could do anything, a meteor fell from the heavens and struck her, killing her instantly.
"Thank Jesus she's dead!" Kurt wailed as they continued their walk, not stopping even a second to look back.
As the warmth of his newfound righteous love filled him with warmth, he saw Puck walking towards them. He looked a bit nervous, but strangely happy. Beside him was Rachel, also grinning with joy.
Kurt looked at them quizzically, looking for any hint of the sudden change from their gloomy selves, and he found what he was looking for on their necks. Two beautiful silver rosarios were hanging devoutly. Kurt was so happy and surprised he stuttered.
"No way! Y-You don't say?"
Puck laughed and kissed Rachel's forehead. Rachel giggled and looked at Kurt and Santana before answering.
"Yes! We've found salvation in Jesus! We're through with being Jewish. And it's all thanks to you, Kurt."
Even though he had called her annoying in the past, but now Kurt was so happy to know that two of his friends had also found the one true path. Santana was the first one to speak.
"Congratulations, guys! I'm so happy for you! I'm sorry for being an insufferable jerk all this time, but that now I've accepted Jesus Christ as my savior, I won't bother you anymore."
"It's okay, Santana, I'm sure they understand. But anyway, Rachel, what about your...uhh...dads?"
"Oh, funny you asked! They got AIDS yesterday and they passed away this morning, but maybe it's for the best. Too bad they never got the chance to redempt themselves, but oh well."
After they said goodbye to each other, Kurt and Santana went to Kurt's house to plan their holy matrimony. Burt, Finn, and Carole were there too, singing gospels, but they put it on hold as they helped Kurt and Santana with their wedding plans. Carole teared up a bit from happiness, and Burt's voice was coarse, as if he was holding back tears of joy. Finn looked a bit confused like usual, but nothing out of ordinary.
As they talked about the wedding dress, suddenly there was an earthquake!