Summary: One-shot: Legolas has to decide – whether to continue with the Fellowship or return home to Mirkwood.
A/N: This is AU in that I picture this conversation taking place days after Gandalf fell in Moria. Which means, technically, they should be in Lorien and not camping as I describe. But camping and not being in Lorien fit the story better, so, as the author, I decided to make it so. My apologies to Mr. Tolkien for the revision to his story... heck, my apologies for doing anything with his story.
Disclaimer: Do I really have to mention I own none of these characters? Please, if they had the option, they probably wouldn't want to be running around in my head anyway. Too bad for them…
Choices, Decisions
The Elf stood pensively staring into the surrounding forest. He saw the trees and grass, but for possibly the first time in his life, paid them no attention. Just as he disregarded the gurgling brook not far away and beautiful sunset that was filling the sky with numerous colors. Absently, he twisted his hands as his fair face grew troubled.
Legolas heard the other members of the Fellowship moving around the campsite, when a particularly loud exclamation from the youngest member distracted him momentarily. The two Hobbit cousins were arguing with each other, as usual, but their antics did not lighten his mood as it normally did. The halflings would probably be shocked if they knew how much he enjoyed them. He certainly did not show it in any way they noticed.
With a deep sigh, the prince tuned out the sounds from the camp as he refocused on his inward debate. He knew what he wanted to do; knew what he felt he should do; but also knew what was expected of him; and what his father considered his duty. Legolas had to decide – continue traveling with the Fellowship or return home to Mirkwood as he originally planned when leaving Imladris.
Footsteps sound behind him, getting louder as their owner approached. Legolas scowled slightly at the unexpected interruption. As they stopped, a hand dropped lightly on his shoulder. "Legolas, what is wrong?" the ranger queried quietly in Sindarin, while standing behind the Elf.
Legolas sighed again and shook his blond head slightly. He didn't turn to face Aragorn. But the Man dropped his hand from the Elf's shoulder and moved in front of him. Legolas met his eyes from a brief moment, before switching his gaze to the distant sky. Without caring, he automatically noted the sun had dropped closer to the horizon.
"Legolas, something is upsetting you. Do not tell me it is nothing. I have known you long enough to know when it is not nothing." Aragorn could have added that he had noticed the Elf fighting inwardly for some time now, though never as obviously as currently.
The Elf shrugged and looked at his friend. "Aragorn, you know my father." Aragorn nodded. "You know how much Mirkwood means to him. The troubles there – the shadow at Dol Guldor. The increasing darkness." Legolas paused and shook his head before continuing. His blue eyes were dark with pain. "We have been fighting the shadow for so long… and we are losing, Estel, we are losing."
Aragorn opened his mouth to speak, but Legolas stopped him. "We do not like to admit it, even amongst ourselves, but it is true. My responsibility as prince is to fight the spiders, the orcs and the shadow. I have been doing it most of my life." His voice momentarily became bitter. "I remember Greenwood the Great. I remember walking through the heart of the forest and it was beautiful. It is not the same anymore, Aragorn. I despair that it ever will be." The bitterness gave way to despair and his normal merry lilt was absent.
Legolas looked away from his friend, a frown marring his brow. Aragorn remained silent, struck by the pain evident in Legolas' face, tone and even posture. He had never seen the prince so disheartened before. With another small shake of his head, Legolas regarded the ranger again, with a serious look.
"Other than the times I served as messenger to Imladris, I was fighting in the forest. There are places I played in as an elfling under sun-drenched trees that I have not seen in centuries. And we keep getting pushed further out; more towards the edge of the forest." The bitter, sad tone of his voice cut into Aragorn and impelled him to speak.
"Legolas, all you say is true. I wish it were not, especially since it is so dire. What has happened to Mirkwood is heartrending, but why are you standing here dwelling on it?" The Man raked a hand through his curly, dark brown hair in agitation. His gray eyes reflected the concern he felt for his oldest friend.
"I have responsibilities, Estel. Duties to my king, my people, my home."
"Yes, but…"
"Let me continue. I have these duties. One was to inform Lord Elrond of Gollum's escape. I was expected to deliver the message, take counsel and return home, post haste. Instead I joined the Fellowship."
"Elrond sent a messenger to your father to inform him," Aragorn countered. Legolas made a face that Aragorn could not interpret. As quickly as it crossed the fair face, it was gone and a neutral expression took its place.
"I know, but I am still divided, Estel."
"Divided?"
The Elf looked off into the distance for the third time since the conversation began, before turning back to his friend. Behind him, he heard the Hobbits conversing; the other Man and the Dwarf were quiet. Even if any one wanted to listen to this private conversation, none could understand Sindarin, except Frodo. And the two friends were speaking quietly enough that their voices would not carry to the others.
"Divided. I agreed to go as far as the mountains. But how can I leave now? We lost Mithrandir already. But my father? He would demand I return home." Legolas' shoulders slumped as he pondered his words.
"He would like you to return home, yes, but not if you truly felt the duty you accepted was not over." Aragorn countered reasonably.
"Maybe, but it is more likely he just would be upset that I agreed to go in the first place; ignoring my duty to my home."
"Nonsense, Legolas." Aragorn shook his head firmly and forestalled the Elf's comment. The ranger continued in a practical voice. "He would be proud that you were chosen to represent Elves in the Fellowship. And it is an honor, my friend. There were many other worthy warriors to choose from, but Elrond chose you."
"Thank you, Estel." Legolas gave his friend a small smile. "I appreciate your point of view, but it does not change the fact that I can hear my father's voice in my head, reminding me of my duty to Mirkwood." The Elf fell silent.
Aragorn was unsure what to say. He could not ever remember seeing Legolas so torn before – and he had known him most of his life. The fact that he kept calling the ranger "Estel" also showed it. Per the Man's preference, Legolas always called him "Aragorn" – unless the Elf was purposely teasing him. Or for the first time, genuinely distracted and upset. Aragorn placed his hand back on Legolas' shoulder.
"My friend, I cannot tell you what to do. You have to make your own decision. But I will tell you this," he paused until the Elf was looking at him. "Whatever decision you make, I will support you."
The Elf raised his hand and put it on Aragorn's shoulder, so that they were connected twice. "Thank you, my friend. Your support means a great deal." Legolas squeezed Aragorn's shoulder, then removed his hand and stepped away from Aragorn's. He turned away and stared at the horizon again. For several minutes he stood so. The sun disappeared completely as he watched. The Man stood observing him, knowing there was nothing else he could say to help. After a while, Aragorn began to debate inwardly whether to stay or head back to camp. Just as he decided to leave, the Elf turned towards him.
"I am going to stay with the Fellowship, Aragorn."
"How did you decide?" The question slipped out before he could prevent it.
"I hate the shadow growing in my home. We can keep fighting it and continue to lose until we are forced out of Mirkwood completely or killed. That is what will happen if this quest fails. We cannot win the forest back with bows and swords. My duty is to protect my home." The Elf's voice became passionate and determined. "And the best way to protect my home is to help the Ring be destroyed. May the Valar bless our Fellowship and Frodo, particularly. He must succeed!"
Legolas smiled at Aragorn, the pain on his face easing. The ranger returned it fully. He was very relieved the Elf was continuing with them. He would travel more comfortably knowing Legolas was watching his back and all his knowledge were with them. He would also sleep better knowing Legolas' sharp eyes and ears were on guard.
"I am glad, Legolas. More than I can say." He paused and smiled again, this time with a bit of smirk in it. He saw an opportunity to lighten Legolas' mood and decided to act on it. "Come, let us head back to camp. Before Gimli starts to cook."
"Alas! We cannot allow that. His cooking is even worse than yours!" The Elf grinned back at the ranger.
"Mine is not that bad!"
Legolas laughed lightly for the first time in days. "Estel, your cooking has made many an Elf sick!" he teased.
"Elves do not get sick," the Man countered, while inwardly rejoicing that the pain had left the blue eyes facing him. They sparkled as they used to.
"Aye, except when you cook." Still laughing, Legolas returned quickly to the safety of camp, before Aragorn could reply. Aragorn followed more slowly, glaring at the Elf's back, as he fought the urge to smile. He was glad Legolas was continuing the Fellowship. Then the Elf called to him in the common tongue.
"Thank the Valar. Samwise and Meriadoc are cooking. Aragorn, we do not have to eat the slop you call food!"
Laughter rang out from all present, and Aragorn laughed harder than the rest.
Yes, Aragorn thought, he was very glad Legolas was continuing to travel with them. For many reasons.
- THE END-
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A/N: I hope you liked this short story. I had time to work on it today, since I'm homebound due to a blizzard. Hopefully I'll have time to work on some of my other stories tomorrow since the snow is still falling. I'm not going anywhere tomorrow either! (and for those reading Joke Gone Wrong – I haven't forgotten it. Just stuck).
BTW, reviews make great presents! Think how easy it is: no wondering what to get, no cost, no busy stores, no wrapping! Just a quick 30 seconds of your time and you'll make my day (and the squirrel's. Can't forget him!)
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!