Not sure if this is going to be a one shot or longer, so please let me know if you'd like it to be a full story in the review section! and please leave me feedback, it's what keeps a writer going! Thank you. :')

It is one crazy scary thing to constantly be in pain and consider it a regular thing, but that's what it was to her, searing pain that sometimes consumed her, so badly she had to muffle screams that were trying to force their way out of her mouth, and hide the limp that came from the burning ache in her thighs from purple bruises.

Suddenly all she would be aware of in the morning after the five seconds before her eyes open was the pain, something she had always said she would never put up with if in the position, but here she was going against her own beliefs because she was afraid, she was absolutely terrified for her own life, at times it even got to the point where she found herself fantasizing of a life where she wasn't even around, or back when she was happy in a relationship, where nothing could possibly touch her.

Abi wasn't sure how or when it got to this, maybe when she decided to open her mouth to Ben more than she should of, she had always had a knack for the foot in mouth syndrome, sometimes it plagued her, and just got her into heaps more stuff that she probably wouldn't have been stuck with. What was life when you couldn't even see a way forward?

She had to have props for one thing though, despite how many times she wanted to beg someone for help, or to scream at the top of her lungs about what was happening to her. She managed to keep her mouth shut, maybe it was because she knew what he was capable of. Ben had killed Heather for Christ sake, and he would always use his fists to put Abi in her place.

No matter how the bruises faded, the pain was always there, the pain that she somehow managed to mask with a bright toothy smile, but if she gave anyone the chance to look closely enough, they could see that the smile didn't even reach her eyes. It wasn't even close. Her eyes had this dullness to them, the spark that they had held long before then, completely wiped out. Like all joy had been sucked from the world. She remembered though that one morning, Jay noticed. He had been eating a slice of toast, and his mouth was full but she still was dying to laugh, he piped in and said. "Abs, what's up with you, lately? You constantly look like someone's pissed on your chips." Abi gave that smile again, and shook her head, seeing Ben stood behind Jay at the kettle, shaking his head at her, as if to say. "You're getting it later." It was a good thing that Sharon was sorting Denny upstairs and Phil was AWOL or they would have seen it, not that Phil would probably be bothered since Ben was his golden boy.

"Just tired with work that's all. The boss has me sorting out all the call directories and bills and stuff, and it's a bit harder than I thought it would be." She gave a smile again, just hoping and praying that somehow, it would work. That Jay would buy it. It was one thing that made it so hard to do, and lie about and that was because Jay knew her too well. He nodded though, and looked as if he believed her. Maybe it was because it was a wet and blistery October morning and he was working at the Arches in less than a few minutes without much sleep. She knew that Ben and him had been playing the new FIFA game until late.

So far throughout her life, Abi had been scared of dying, her brother's death had petrified her, because he had been so young and had lost so much, it was petrifying. But lately she had this diary where she had documented everything that happened, all the punches, the kicks, and the horrible conversations of what he would say to her. She kept it in her locker at work, with a sticky note on the front that said. "If anything is to happen to me, give to Jay Brown as there's instructions inside. Thank you, Abi Branning."

In fact she had written goodbye letters too, just in case either Ben killed her by beating her to death, or if she kicked the bucket herself, deciding to kill herself. The letters were to her mother, her father, Lauren, Dot, Cora, Lola and Jay and even one for little Oscar and Dexter. She even remembered briefly writing one to Phil and Sharon so they could know what a precious little angel Ben really was, but she didn't think Phil would even read it.

Tears stained the important letters, especially her parent's and Jay's. She knew that if anything were to happen to her at Ben's hands, then Jay would blame himself and that wasn't what she wanted, and he would probably kill Ben because of it, she knew that somewhere inside Jay he did still care for her, even if it was as just a friend.

Standing up, she let her hazel eyes move carefully to look into the mirror, avoiding the pain that was searing above her right eye, looking at the damage that was done, her breath hitched in her throat, the bruise was bright purple, and she wondered how the hell she was going to hide it with make up. It ended up with her covering her face with what felt like six tonnes of concealer and foundation. Today was her day off, and she knew the boys were in half day, she couldn't help but feel the dread start to build in her stomach. What would it be today that set Ben off? What would she do to cause another row between them? And make the Mitchell boy mad?

It was like continuously walking on eggshells and she hated it, she just couldn't let herself relax. Abi had always been this bubbly bright and intelligent girl, but now with all that Ben had called her, all the words he had said that had slashed her skin like knives metaphorically, it made her feel completely broken down and alone. When in reality that wasn't true, if she needed someone, all she had to do was ask. She was quite close to Sharon and Jay would always be there for her. But with the words, it was like everything she knew just completely disappeared.

How could something break a girl as strong as her down? After all the stuff she had gone through in her life, it was like now she was actually weighing up the pro's about dying, such as being with her brother again, god she actually really missed Bradley, even if she didn't show it.

Pulling herself up, she walked down the stairs to the couch, she heard the front door open, and the familiar footsteps that she was dreading massively, surely he couldn't be back yet? What was he doing home so early? It was only half ten.

"Abi are you up?"

She froze, not knowing what to possibly say or do, but she knew that she couldn't avoid him, it would just cause further pain down the line.

"In the living room."

Her head snapped up as she saw the door open, and his face, and the expression she was dreading, it wasn't until she saw his hands gripping a letter, from her phone company, with the details of all her calls on. Her phone bill which she had already paid, but they insisted on sending itemised bills out every month.

"Why have you phoned a domestic abuse helpline?" The tone of his voice was repulsed, like she actually would go against him, and it was then that she knew she was done for, she had nothing she could possibly say, what could she say that wouldn't make him go off his nut?

Instead, she stood up trying to run, as it was the first thing that popped into her head, but it was no use because with all the pain she was in, he caught up in what felt like seconds, his hands gripping her throat as he held her against the wall, cutting off the air from her windpipe, and making it almost impossible for her to breathe.

"WHY? WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT? YOU ALWAYS DO THIS ABI! YOU ALWAYS MAKE ME ANGRY! Do you think I like being angry with you, huh? Do you think I like being this mad at something that's not even worth my time. You are not even worth my time. You do that again, and you'll wish you'd never have been born." He spat at her, gripping her throat again, before pulling her back and shoving her with a force. She didn't even have a chance to answer any of his questions, it was as if he didn't even want an answer anyway. She smacked her head on the side of the banister in front of her, catching her nose also, it wasn't until she heard the door slam that she realized she was alone. Blood dripped from the cut and her nose, the searing pain returning, but it wasn't like it ever really left, because even if she didn't feel it physically, she always felt it inside, a constant reminder of how alone she was and how hopeless this stupid situation was that she was in.

"You'll wish you'd never have been born."

If only Ben knew that she already did.

There's no one to save you, but yourself.