Author's Note: I don't know. Just messing around. Even though the idea of Renessme revolts me.

Summary: Nessie wants to grow up. Fast.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

On The Rag

She looked up at me and, for a moment, I wondered how I could have even compared her to Bella. Younger, yeah, and if I didn't know much better it would have been just plain creepy to think of her like I thought about Bella--but still.

"Jake?"

I glanced at her. "Hmm?"

She smiled. "Your staring again."

I smiled back. "Was I?"

Nessie, thirteen as of last month, blinked her green, green eyes--that I assumed were Edward's--and shifted slightly on the couch, so that her knee touched mine. I knew what she was playing at--Bella had done the same only...shit, what was it? Eight years? Right on the beach, sat me down as we stared at the ocean and batted her big brown eyes. Except that time it'd worked, and this time it was such a hilarious sight that I had to bite my lip to keep from laughing.

Her eyes flashed, and the faintest hint of red rose to her cheeks. "What?"

I smiled at her again, just for lack of anything to say. I noticed, now that her face was leaning closer and closer, that she had the faintest hint of freckles beneath her alabaster skin, climbing up her nose and spreading out at the apple of her cheeks. Her lips where an almost pure pink.

Finally, I let myself chuckle as her shoulders fell and she seemed to fall back some. "What?"

I struggled with my smile as she pouted her lips. I didn't care how mature Bella insisted she was--she was a teenage girl, and victim to the antics that fell on any other teenage girl in the country. Hell, the world.

"What are you doing?" I asked as she folded her legs in and leaned against her arm, her palm strategically placed beside my leg.

"You know," she said, "Mom and Dad aren't home...nobodies home, in fact. We're all alone."

This time, I couldn't help myself. The laugh came from the gut, bordering on hysterics to the point where I could barely speak. "Are--Jesus--a-are you hitting on me?"

The slight color in her cheeks burst into a full fledged blush, taking over her entire face as she leaned back against the couch and smacked my leg. "Shut up," she said, "I am not."

"You are," I gasped, clutching my stomach and throwing my head back in another throw of laughter. "You're hitting on me."

She crossed her arms and started to stand up, walking it what could only be described as a ridiculous parody of a slink. "Fine," she grumbled. "Since I'm obviously so repulsive, I'll just go somewhere where I'm not breathing your freaking air."

The ghost of laughter still in my voice, I got up and followed her. "Ah, come on, Nessie. I didn't mean anything."

She abruptly spun on her heels and turned to face me. "Your such a stupid jerk. You know I'm probably the only thirteen year old on the planet who's never been kissed?"

Oh, man, I thought. Here comes the angst.

The whole idea was ridiculous, that the self-aware, intelligent little infant he'd watched grow up could ever become like every girl in my seventh grade class. But, lo and behold.

"Thirteen's not as old as you think, Nessie," I sighed, running a hand through my hair.

"Is that it?" she cried. "Is it because I'm too young? Dad is a hundred years older then Mom, Jacob." She glared at me. "And he kisses her."

"God, Nessie..." I never expected this, not for a minute. "You'll probably be older then me in a few days, at the rate your going."

"What does it matter?" She was crying, now, over-dramatic tears that Jacob knew he couldn't dry with words. "We're going to be together anyway. Look at Claire and Quil!" She threw her hands in the air to emphasise her point. "It's not like I'm five years old!"

"Ness," I said calmly, "just cool it, okay?"

"I'm not gonna fucking cool it!" The word sounded so damn wrong coming from her I nearly shuddered. "What is it, Jake? Am I not pretty enough? Would you rather have one of those half naked girls walking around the park? Fine, you can have them."

Despite my protest, she started to stomp away, sniffling and cursing under her breath.

Finally, I grabbed her elbow and spun her around, pressing my lips lightly against hers. So light, in fact, it was almost chaste; she was thirteen, after all.

"I want you, Ness," I whispered as she blinked her own big green eyes at me. "Always."

With a smile on her face, she almost floated up the long winding staircase into her room.

I tried to keep her out of my mind when Edward and Bella came home. That was one bitch fit I wasn't touching.

FIN