A/N: I was in a crummy mood and needed to find some way to get rid of it and so torturing Reno seemed like the best answer. Don't worry, he's too flamboyant to be kept down for long. Technically this can be set after "On My Way To You" because that's kind of where it picks up but it also works well alone. Please R&R to let me know how I'm doing.

Standard Disclaimers Apply. Background music: "If You Only Knew" by Shinedown (their whole cd is greatness)

"Made a Mistake"

By MakoRain

The first clock he had met the disastrous death of being shot off the wall from ticking too loudly. Rude, his neighbor next door in the ShinRa Turks' apartment complex, was none too pleased. Still, he had been ruder than necessary. Rude being rude. Even that small pun made Reno chuckle; he blamed it on his current state of mind.

The second clock had the misfortune of committing suicide falling out of his fifth story window to land in a shattering of pieces because it's holographic numbers kept glaring at him from their reflection on the ceiling. Unfortunately, Tseng had the unpleasant experience of finding the mess on his deck the next day since he lived in the room below. Even more unfortunate, Tseng had given the clock to him as a gift; he could still hear his superior's grumbles bouncing off the walls of his small apartment to nag at him all over again.

Now with this third clock the red numbers shone something fierce, like lava burned into his retina. 4:03 in the a.m. Every time he closed his eyes all he could see was that damned red light until he threw it , sending it across the room, satisfied with the explosion it made with the impact of the wall. The sound of footsteps could be heard next door and he braced himself, breathing a sigh of relief as Rude could be heard moving away to his bed and the footsteps ceased.

Anger was good, it gave him something to focus on besides the all consuming pity he felt every night. There was nothing more he loathed than pity. Correction: there was nothing he hated more than self pity, emphasis on the self. Her voice floated through his mind and he shook it away but not before the truth of her words rang clear: Self pity doesn't look good on you.

He tossed over to his side, staring at the empty space in his bed next to him. It was all her fault. He used to be able to look at that spot next to him and find a beautiful body warming the space there but now it was empty more and more, as it was now. Originally he explained it away with the fact that only the hot young things could be found on the weekends and so he made the bar scene then instead of every night like before. Right after he was free of her constraints, he hopped aboard the conga sex line with a new girl eight days a week. But now, the sight of her dark eyes and dark hair contrasted by her light smile she always had for him was the only thing he wanted and the one thing he couldn't have.

Reno turned to his other side, looking past the ghost of the former clock clinging to his nightstand to the bottle of Jack Daniels next to it. There was a crystal tumbler at the ready, willing and able to provide a warmth that numbed his being. The downside was that it would be a bitch to wake up the next morning and carry on as if nothing was wrong.

That thought made him put his hands over his eyes with a groan. He would have to see her again and again, every day, laughing with their coworkers as if she didn't have a care in the world while he barely hung on by a quickly unraveling thread. If she only knew.

It was all her fault. He hadn't been able to sleep for weeks now and it was all because she left.

But if it was all her fault then why couldn't he get her out of his head?

Reno rolled again to his back, taking a pillow to press over his face. Maybe smothering himself would bring some peace.

It's your fault.

Apparently not.

"She's not here!" Great, he was talking to the voice in his head now; yep, he was officially losing it.

She's not here because of you.

"She's not here because she left!" Might as well keep going down the tracks on the crazy train, it had to bring him somewhere better than where he was now.

You made her leave.

"I...made her leave." The truth of such simple words sank in and made him realize something he never had the guts to say before. "I made a mistake."

Don't you think she should know that?

In reply to his over productive conscience, he walked out of his apartment and made his way down to hers, the bright hallway having no effect on him. He was wide awake now and kept repeating "I made a mistake" over and over again as if not to forget. It was a great opening line, really.

The knocks his fist made on the door were louder than usual and he looked up and down the hall with long brightly lit walls lined with doors on either side. There was no one around but that didn't matter, he needed to do this even if all of the Turks were in the same room. He needed her to know.

Finally, the door opened to his bleary eyed beauty, hair slightly a mess showing that he had just got her out of bed. She was so cute when she first woke up, even at five something in the morning.

"Reno?"

Damn, she beat him to the punch. "Cissnei."

All of the words he had been going over on the way down flew out of his brain and he scratched the back of his head as if that would somehow help. Yeah, that'll bring them back. Instead, he kept staring at her leaning against the door in her flannel pajamas, looking so cute he just wanted to wrap her up in a big bear hug. But first, he had something to say if her expectant gaze didn't allude to that already.

"I made a mistake."

That had her wide eyed and mouth gaping. It was nothing short of a miracle that Reno would admit he was wrong and it was something that he knew was rare but not that rare. Thankfully, she quickly recovered so he could continue with some sense of dignity before he lost his nerve.

"I need you with me."

Her shock once resolved turned into awe at this admission and he could see her soften just a bit.

"I know I said that I wanted to keep things casual between us but..." He swallowed again, wanting to keep things making sense. "I mean, we're really good together and the sex is amazing and you're a great fighter and there's nothing I would ever change about you so why would I make you stay away when-"

Cissnei stepped out into the hallway and placed a slim finger over his lips, muffling his last "-I need you," and replying with a simple "I get the point."

Reno could have been mistaken but he was pretty sure that she was holding back laughter, that was a good sign.

They stood like that a few moments that felt like hours with how much he was itching to touch her until she finally gave permission, making the first move by wrapping her arms around him right there in the hallway in the sweetest hug. He stopped talking and fell into the moment of feeling her in his arms once again, so soft and warm and fuzzy in her adorable flannel.

He meant it when he said there was nothing he would ever change about her and he lazily brushed his hands through her hair, imprinting each strand to memory. With a mind of their own, Reno's hands made their way up and down her spine until she sighed into him, resting her head on his chest as he tucked her under his chin. This moment was all he imagined it would be; there was no way it could be made better until four small words popped into his head and out of his mouth in a daze.

"And I love you."

He waited for the sheer terror of his words to sink in, for him to start shaking or push her away or run down the hall, but none of that happened. Instead, he felt her squeeze him tighter in response.

"It's a little late," he said, reminding them both of when she said it just before they split up.

The fact that those three small words scared him more than anything he had ever faced in his life told him before that it was time for her to go. Now, it was the best feeling in the world, made even better when Cissnei spoke up.

"It's the thought that counts."

Reno could feel her smile through his shirt warming up his skin and leaned down to her uplifted face to share a sweet and soft kiss that turned into something more heated as both were reminded of the time spent apart. Over three months with random sex from faceless women could never compare to the best sex he had ever known. It had been far too long and her eyes said the same thing as they parted and Cissnei pulled him back into her room with a laugh that was cut off with the closing of the door. Correction: make up sex was the best sex ever known.

As it was meant to be.

The End