"I guess I just needed a place to escape reality." I took a deep breath in hopes to relief some of the pain that was forming inside my chest.
"What do you mean by that Helene?" A small smile played around her lips.
"That your arrival might be just in time."
I dropped my head back against the couch. "God, how long has it been?"
She smiled. "About three hundred years now, my dear"
A wave of nausea washed over me. This woman had held the key to my heart for about six hundred years now. An everlasting bittersweet nightmare.
"How did you find me?"
"I didn't. I wasn't expecting to either."
I tried to weigh the chances of her telling me the truth. She still had most of her memories, it was safe to say that this wasn't a fair battle. My memory had been wiped clean and my powers had been stripped from the years of training I had devoted to them. Nineteen again. I didn't know why I was nineteen again. A new name, a new life, a new time. And no memory from my past. Except for her.
Catherine…
The name echoed inside my head. All I needed was a glimpse of her, and I fell all over again. There was no crawling out of this rabbit hole.
"A coincidence then?" I was aware of how naïve I sounded. How could she have found me just by chance? It felt like someone was playing some kind of sick prank on me.
"The elders hate you Catherine. I doubt they would place you for a job that would lead straight to me."
"Granted Helene, they do hate me. I don't get this as well." She ran a hand through her hair.
I turned my gaze to another direction. This wasn't the time for butterflies. Her smile grew bigger. "You haven't changed a bit. Is it that hard to resist me?" I grit my teeth, she was on to me. "I wouldn't know. No memory this time."
"I am painfully aware of that."
"Are you?" I walked away from the couch.
"I am." Her smile faded and her face turned harsh. "You think I'm playing games here?"
"There is no way in hell you actually found me by chance."
"God I thought you would have been happy to see me!" She jumped up from her place and trailed behind me as her sudden action made me turn.
"How could I Catherine! How fucking could I? I've been alone in this for nineteen years now! No one to tell me about all this! And then when I finally start to get my shit together, the lingering empty feeling identifies herself."
I felt myself losing it. All I needed was a spark to light these flames. I needed her to calm me down before I started to say things I didn't mean.
"Christ Helene! I've been searching for you for over three hundred years now! At least you don't remember being alone for that long!" Tears were starting to form in her pale green eyes.
The pain in my chest increased. I met her eyes and the realisation hit me.
It hurts to see her in pain.
"Catherine… I…" My voice trembled and I reached out for her. I couldn't explain my actions. I had no visible memory of this woman, yet I could still remember her.
She stepped forward and gently hugged me. I felt a soft kiss on my forehead. "It's going to be okay."
I closed my eyes and allowed myself to let tears run down my face.
"How can you miss someone you don't remember?"