A/N:: This is an entry for METMA Mandy's challenge. It makes no sense......just r/r.
Disclaimer:: I own nothing but the phone sex hotline and the dog collar.
BUTTERBEE, TRAFFIC LIGHTS, AND PHONE SEX HOTLINES
By Ron's Babe
Ron Weasley was in the Gryffindor common room, searching franticall for his dog, Butterbee.
"Butterbee, Butterbee, where are you sweeddums? Come to Papa!" He cooed, causing him to get confused stares from the other Gryffindors.
"I must go find him," He muttered to himself. "I'll go and find Hermione, and She'll help me, yes that's right."
He made his way out of the portrait hole, and through the corridors. However, before he even reached Hermione (who was presumably in the library), something took his mind off that and Butterbee.
It was a telephone.
"Wow," Ron muttered. "A FELLYTONE!!!! SOOO COOL!!!"
He had forgotten how to use one, so he picked up the reciever and pressed a button. A ringing filled the air and Ron shrieked.
A voice started talking on the other line. When Ron finally could hear again, he heard it. It sounded like......but no, it couldn't be...........
"Hello" said a seductive voice. " This is the ultimate phone sex hotline, Sexy Snape speaking, how may I pleasure you today?"
"AAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!!!!" Shouted Ron, and He tore off toward the library.
When he got there, he saw Hermione fuming at a ragged looking Harry, he was chewing on some splinter like things.
"Harry, How dare you eat my Fish and Chips!! You know that is the only thing that keeps my mind away from Ro-" She suddenly saw him.
Being as shallow as Ron is, he didn't pick that up. Instead, he asked her about Butterbee.
"Hermione, have you seen Butterbee, my dog?"
Suddenly,arry made a choking noise and spit something up. It was a dog collar, that looked somewhat like............
" ACHALTA HA KELEV SHELI!!!!" Ron roared, turning red with anger.
"what does that mean?" Hermione asked, looking puzzled.
"IT MEANS THE PRAT ATE MY FREAKIN DOG!!"
Harry looked nonplussed. "Oh, so you're a traffic light too?"
He said knowledgeably. "Hard work isn't it.........oh, must, go, my lights green."
And he left the Library.
Ron, suddenly forgetting what happened ( I told u he was shallow), said, "I could do with some chocolate Chips right now."
Hermione, who had a devilish grin on her face, said, " I could do with.........you!" She ran up to him and started kissing him.
"Uhh, Hermione?" Ron asked in between kisses. " Did Harry eat you're fish and chips?"
"Yes, yes he did, I'm glad he did......."
"OK then," Ron said.
He sure wasn't going to object getting it from Hermione. At least she wasn't Snape.........................
Did that totally suck or what??? I thought i did pretty good, seeing that it was my 1st Humor fic ever. R/R please!
Disclaimer:: I own nothing but the phone sex hotline and the dog collar.
BUTTERBEE, TRAFFIC LIGHTS, AND PHONE SEX HOTLINES
By Ron's Babe
Ron Weasley was in the Gryffindor common room, searching franticall for his dog, Butterbee.
"Butterbee, Butterbee, where are you sweeddums? Come to Papa!" He cooed, causing him to get confused stares from the other Gryffindors.
"I must go find him," He muttered to himself. "I'll go and find Hermione, and She'll help me, yes that's right."
He made his way out of the portrait hole, and through the corridors. However, before he even reached Hermione (who was presumably in the library), something took his mind off that and Butterbee.
It was a telephone.
"Wow," Ron muttered. "A FELLYTONE!!!! SOOO COOL!!!"
He had forgotten how to use one, so he picked up the reciever and pressed a button. A ringing filled the air and Ron shrieked.
A voice started talking on the other line. When Ron finally could hear again, he heard it. It sounded like......but no, it couldn't be...........
"Hello" said a seductive voice. " This is the ultimate phone sex hotline, Sexy Snape speaking, how may I pleasure you today?"
"AAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!!!!" Shouted Ron, and He tore off toward the library.
When he got there, he saw Hermione fuming at a ragged looking Harry, he was chewing on some splinter like things.
"Harry, How dare you eat my Fish and Chips!! You know that is the only thing that keeps my mind away from Ro-" She suddenly saw him.
Being as shallow as Ron is, he didn't pick that up. Instead, he asked her about Butterbee.
"Hermione, have you seen Butterbee, my dog?"
Suddenly,arry made a choking noise and spit something up. It was a dog collar, that looked somewhat like............
" ACHALTA HA KELEV SHELI!!!!" Ron roared, turning red with anger.
"what does that mean?" Hermione asked, looking puzzled.
"IT MEANS THE PRAT ATE MY FREAKIN DOG!!"
Harry looked nonplussed. "Oh, so you're a traffic light too?"
He said knowledgeably. "Hard work isn't it.........oh, must, go, my lights green."
And he left the Library.
Ron, suddenly forgetting what happened ( I told u he was shallow), said, "I could do with some chocolate Chips right now."
Hermione, who had a devilish grin on her face, said, " I could do with.........you!" She ran up to him and started kissing him.
"Uhh, Hermione?" Ron asked in between kisses. " Did Harry eat you're fish and chips?"
"Yes, yes he did, I'm glad he did......."
"OK then," Ron said.
He sure wasn't going to object getting it from Hermione. At least she wasn't Snape.........................
Did that totally suck or what??? I thought i did pretty good, seeing that it was my 1st Humor fic ever. R/R please!