Clear your mind
Severus Snape strolled down the hallways of Hogwarts School of witchcraft and wizardry towards the headmaster's office with a spring in his step.
Ever since Black had died he had been in an exceedingly good mood.
"It's like Christmas, my birthday, and Halloween all in one!" He thought.
It hadn't exactly been a plan or anything, but it had worked out perfectly nevertheless.
Not teaching Potter oclumency had been the best thing he'd ever done, and despite what the dark lord thought, it was not on his orders.
Snape couldn't stand the hypocritical bastard.
The only reason he had not taught the brat was because of his hatred for his father and godfather.
Snape was not ashamed to admit he held a grudge.
That did not make him a hypocrite however. No sir.
"Clear your mind." He cackled to himself. "I might as well have told him to dance naked around the office for all the good it did him!"
Whistling cheerfully, Snape said the password to the gargoyle and stepped onto the staircase.
Snape lifted his hand to knock, but before his fist hit the wood he heard Dumbledore's voice tell him to enter.
The man did not sound like his normal positive self, Snape noted.
He pushed open the door and stepped inside the office.
A few steps in, the door slammed behind him.
"This is most peculiar." He thought.
"Sit." Dumbledore said.
The headmaster's voice was rather cold, and the usually twinkling eyed man had a frown twisting his smiling lips.
"How may I be of assistance today, headmaster?" Snape asked calmly.
"This came to me by owl today, Severus." He said, placing a peace of parchment in front of Snape.
Snape picked up the paper and began to read.
Headmaster,
I hate to bother you so early into the summer holidays, however do to the death of Serious I feel it can not wait.
I would like tips on Oclumency. Professor Snape did not explain it very well, however I'm sure that's just do to my lack of comprehension, and that there is no fault on professor Snapes part.
One wonders how I may clear my mind, for that is the only step that appears to be needed, according to professor snape.
Perhaps you have a book lying around somewhere, or a few pointers you can write back with.
Your student,
H.P
"Oh, dear." Snape thought. "I'm in a bit of deep shit."
Before he could think of a plazable lie, he knew the truth of the matter was all over his face.
"Headmaster, I-"
"Not a word." Dumbledore said.
Cold fury was etched all over his face, and an aura of power surrounded him.
Snape was starting to understand why the dark lord feared this man.
"I'd ask you why Severus, but we both know why you did this." He said.
"James!" Snape shrieked suddenly. "James, James, James, James!"
"Harry is not James, Severus!" The old man thundered.
"He is!" Snape screamed. "He's James, strutting around the school, women hanging from his every word, pulling pranks daily!"
Dumbledore boggled. "Are... Are we talking about the same person, here?" He asked.
Snape seemed not to have heard him.
"So I told him to clear his mind, and oh the memories I got of perfect Potters childhood." He continued to rant.
A demented smile was stretched across his face now, and all vestiges of sanity had left him.
"To add to it, Black's dead!"
He began to dance a wild jig around the office.
Dumbledore had seen enough.
"Stupefy." He said causing Snape to fall to the ground.
"What to do?" Dumbledore thought.
A few minutes later an idea came to him.
Mouth stretched into a smirk, he dragged the unconscious man into a room behind the office.
Severus Snape woke up to a blinding light shining into his eyes.
Groaning, he tried lifting his arms to block out the light, but noticed they appeared to be tied down.
"Wha-"
"I see you're awake!" The ever cheerful voice of Albus Dumbledore trumpeted next to Snapes ear causing him to jump.
"Why am I tied down, headmaster?" Snape asked.
"Well, I figure a punishment of some sort is in order for nearly destroying Mr. Potters mind, don't you?" Dumbledore said.
"Going to crucio me?" Snape snarled. "You're no better than the dark lord!"
"Oh no!" Dumbledore said, sounding shocked. "What I will do to you will make crucio look tame."
All Snape could do was stare in horror as Dumbledore walked towards him, wand raised.
"There is a spell," Dumbledore started to explain. "Which causes someone's oclumency barriers to completely fall." "Not really useful in battle and impossible to do from a distance, but in this case it should work fine."
"I don't understand." Snape said.
"My dear boy," Dumbledore said. "You are going to throw me out by clearing your mind."
"Son of a bi." Snape started to say, however his voice was drown out by Dumbledore's shouted incantation.
"Mindus barrius destroyious!"
Snape felt as if a battering ram slammed into his oclumency walls.
Hard as he tried, there was nothing he could do.
"Now the fun can begin!" Dumbledore cackled. "Just remember, clear your mind!"
Snape began to scream.
"Legilimens." Dumbledore incanted.
Memories began to race by. Snape on the Hogwarts express, Snape talking to Dumbledore and voldemort, Snape leaving the apothecary.
"This isn't so bad." Snape thought.
A second later he was rethinking his choice of words, as a sharp pain came from his right hand.
"Did I fail to mention?" Dumbledore said. "This spell also causes you to replay any physical discomfort."
Snape tried to speak, however the newly broken jaw he was sporting made it difficult.
His father had been in an especially foul mood that day.
"Clear your mind, clear your mind!" Dumbledore screamed. "If you thought the boy could do it, why can't you!"
Snape was helpless and he knew it. Blood from old beatings, by his father, by the death eaters, by Black and Potter was pouring in a steady stream from his body.
"Can't have you bleed out." Dumbledore said. "We're just getting started!"
He poured a blood replenishing potion down Snapes throat.
Snape tried to resist, but could do nothing against the old man's grip.
"Here comes my favorite part!" Dumbledore beamed. "It's every crucio you ever cast, along with the pain of the dark mark, all in one!"
White fire raced through Snapes body, and he began to scream.
"Clear your mind, now!" Dumbledore said. "You should be better at this by now, Severus!"
After hours of this Severus Snape realized one thing.
The dark lord was fucked; he just didn't know it yet.
A few days later Dumbledore walked into the room where Snape was being held.
"Well my boy?" He said. "What have we learned?"
Severus Snape was in a corner of the room, rocking back and forth muttering something under his breath.
The old man had to strain to hear what Snape was saying, but when he did a delighted smile crept across his face.
"Clear your mind." Snape muttered. "Clear your mind... Clear your mind... Cle... Cle... Cle..."
"Everything worked out perfectly." Dumbledore thought.
Now perhaps it was time to get that Snape simulacrum to be hired for the Defense against the dark arts posission.
It was still early in the summer, time would tell.
Until then however, there was always helping Severus to clear his mind.