The Wright Stuff

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After watching the pilot episode of Sweet Soul Ninja: Adventures in Space, Pearl suddenly decides she wants to become a "part time" astronaut and it's up to Phoenix and Maya to crush her poor little dreams.

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"Mystic Maya!" Pearl said as she turned off the television. Thirty minutes had passed and in that time, little Pearl Fey had learned a new word (astronaut) and discovered a new interest. "So what did you think? Now I'm really excited! I can't wait to find out what happens in space!"

"Me too!" Maya said. She sat next to Pearl on the big couch in front of the small TV and wrapped her arm around her little cousin's shoulder. "Do you think the Sweet Soul Ninja will still be able to play his jazz music while in space? Ooh, it's so exciting! What do you think, Pearly?"

"I don't know," Pearl said, biting at her tiny fingernails. "I can't wait until the next episode comes out."

Phoenix, who was standing impatiently at the microwave waiting for his pizza to finish heating, chimed in. "Well, that's only the pilot, Pearls. That means there probably won't be another episode for a while."

"Pie-lot?"

"Yeah, what do you mean, pilot? The Sweet Soul Ninja isn't the one controlling the spaceship, he's just a passenger!"

Phoenix sighed. I should have just left them both alone in their own little world. But noooo, I had to open my big fat mouth…

"That's it, Mystic Maya!" Pearl said suddenly, jumping up from the couch. "I know what I want to do now!"

"Really?" said Maya. "Ooh, tell me about it."

"I'm going to be an astronaut! Maybe I'll even start practicing my skills on the trumpet so I can play the sweet jazz music!"

Maya looked over her shoulder at Phoenix, who still stood next to the microwave, incredulous. Their eyes asked each other "Who's going to break it to her?", they played a completely non-verbal game of rock-paper-scissors without moving their hands, Phoenix lost, and he ended up walking over to the couch without the pizza that still rotated and rotated in the 'wave.

"Erm, how are you going to do that, Pearls?" Phoenix sat down on the couch next to Maya and looked up at Pearl, who was still bouncing up and down happily, thoroughly content, it seemed, to just think about being an astronaut. "It takes a lot of hard work to be an astronaut, and besides, you'd be away from home and your family for such long periods of time."

Maybe I shouldn't have brought up her family... Phoenix thought as soon as he had finished talking. Pearl looked down at her feet and Maya said "aww" sentimentally.

"Oh, I see," Pearl said. "I know, Mystic Maya!" she said. "I can be a part-time astronaut! That way I can go into space and still be there when you and Mr. Nick get married." Pearl giggled happily, leaving Maya and Phoenix to glance sheepishly at each other.

"Um, okay. Hey, Pearly," Maya said. "Do you know what makes astronauts so great?"

"What's that?"

"Well, when the first astronauts went up into space…they didn't know if they would come back down or not!"

"Really?" said Pearl. She bit her lip.

"Yeah!" Maya said, "There were a lot of bad things that could happen. Like running out of fuel, or—"

"Maya," Phoenix said. "Let me handle this. Pearls, not just anyone can be a good astronaut. You gotta have the right stuff."

"The right stuff?" Pearl asked.

"Yeah. You have to have determination, courage and pure skill. And true grit. That too."

"Don't forget about the power to fight off evil aliens and rival ninjas," Maya said, winking. She shook Phoenix's shoulder playfully.

"I didn't see any aliens in that episode," Phoenix said. Actually, there weren't even any other ninjas! He was fighting samurai and rock stars the whole time!

"Use your imagination, Mr. Nick!"

"Yeah, Nick," Maya parroted, "use your imagination!"

Okay…I'm imagining that I'm not actually here right now…hmm, nope, not working.

"The point is, Pearls, being an astronaut is serious business. After all, the, er, Sweet and Sour Ninja—"

"Sweet Soul Ninja, Nick!" Maya said, winking. "You know, like soul music. And jazz and blues! With the sax-o-phone and the tuba-phone and you can make calls—"

"A 'saxophone' isn't a type of phone, Maya!"

Besides, I always imagined Pearl playing the flute or something like that, maybe on the cover of some orchestra's album or something. Pearl, the virtuoso.

"Anyway," Maya continued, "the Sweet Soul Ninja is all about self-expression and making music to save the people you love!"

"It's so romantic," Pearl said. "Don't you think, Mr. Nick?"

"Um, yeah…I guess?" Phoenix tapped his fingers on the arm of the couch. Was the pizza ever going to finish defrosting?

"Are you going to make music to save Mystic Maya?"

Music? I can barely make frozen pizza! I spent three weeks trying to learn "Chopsticks"! Everybody at Ivy U laughed at me because I played the drums off-key!

"I have an idea, Pearls. How about, when you get older, I'll, uh…buy you a saxophone. Then you can play the funky, funk jazz yourself and still not have to spend years of rigorous training that probably will never be helpful because you won't be able to go into space any—"

"Nick!" Maya huffed.

"Rig-oar-us? What's a 'rig oar' and why us?"

Phoenix sighed and sat forward. "Okay, how about this," he said hesitantly, looking from Pearl (who stood in front of him eagerly) to Maya (who sat beside him, presumably preparing to maul him if he said something stupid). "I'll help you start playing, and I'll even buy you the first season of Sweet Soul Ninja if—er, when it comes out on DVD. Okay?"

"Yaaay! Thank you, Mr. Nick!" Pearl said and jumped at him, throwing her arms around his neck. He went "oof."

"Wow!" Maya said. "Thanks, Nick!" and she too grabbed the sitting lawyer around the waist and clung like a sea sponge.

Phoenix tried his hardest not to smile and failed miserably. He knew his face was bright red, and he probably had that stupid 'aw shucks' look on his face, too. At this rate, he was going to be broke, homeless…and loving every minute of it. Maybe this was why people became hobos.