"i came to the gym to work out but holy god i can't stop watching you do one armed push ups that's so hot" au
"this is totally awkward considering before this the only interactions we've ever had have been casual nods to each other in the hallway but there's a huge fucking spider in my bath tub and you seem like the friendly neighbor type please help me" au
"okay i get it you're a great thief and don't want to go to jail but i'm the exhausted af detective that's assigned to catch you i stg if you let me bring you in so i can sleep i'll get you a good deal" au
"okay i get that there are no seats left in this cafe but like i am trying to read here no you cannot have this chair my feet are using it thank you very much please get out of my face now" au
"my parents moved me halfway across the world when we were twelve and before that we were best friends but now i'm back and moving in across the hall from you so hi?" au
"i've been travelling a lot and somehow you're in every single city i go to seriously what the fuck who even are you how are you doing this" au
"we've been nothing but friends for our whole lives but then we played seven minutes in heaven on a dare and now i think i might actually be in love with you" au
"ngl i thought you were the weak one of this friend group but your whole life just went to complete shit around you and somehow you're still acting the same so if you want to be weak you can be around me" au
"my guitarist quit the night before the gig that could mean the big break for a band that i have put my soul into and supposedly you're really good but i swear to god if you screw this up for me i will hunt you down and slit your throat" au
"it seems we're the only two people in this class that actually know what the fuck is going on want to team up for this project and ruin everybody's lives" au
"we started arguing about which hogwarts house this one character would be in and we completely lost track of time and now you're demanding i take you out to dinner is this a date" au
"i'm the private investigator that was hired by your ex to track you down and you totally caught me sitting outside your apartment in a rental car so hi what up" au
"i came to check out this support group but things have kind of been majorly sucking lately and you were there and i didn't even know anything was wrong but we've known each other for months what gives" au
"i'm the lawyer helping you get custody of your daughter and oops you're all kinds of adorable with her and also i think she's growing attached to me is this good or bad" au
"i meant to text the contact one above you in my phone's contact list for a booty call but i didn't realize i hit your name until i sent it so now i'm just sitting here feeling those little three dots hardcore judging me" au
"we started dating after months of sexual tension between us but then you moved across the country so now we're trying to figure out how to make this brand new relationship work long distance" au
"so not to be rude or anything but i've been coming to this cemetery at this time on this day every week for fucking years and i've always been alone up until now seriously what the hell" au
"it's the middle of the night and i'm walking home alone in the dark and there's this guy following me and he's starting to gain on me and i found this phone booth with a lock on the door and i tried to call my best friend but my hands were shaking so badly i accidentally dialed the wrong number and i don't even know you but help me" au
We're both auditioning for the same part and I kinda hope you get it.
You're the star of the show and I'm just ensemble, there's no way you'd ever notice me, right?
I make the costumes and you keep bringing yours back for adjustments- how many times can someone 'accidentally' rip a seam?
You need an accompanist and I just so happen to play the piano.
*OR* You need an accompanist and I lied and told you I did so now I have to learn those pieces real quick.
I know we're both acting but wow, this on-stage chemistry is really convincing.
I walked past an open window and heard someone singing, now I can't get that voice out of my head.
I have to learn to dance for this play, and you have three weeks to teach me.
I think we should rehearse scene 4 a little more. Oh, is that the one where our characters kiss? I didn't realize.
I'm the director and you repeatedly show up late with starbucks.
I use improv class as an excuse to flirt with you.
I work the night shift at this diner with you to pay my way through drama school, could you test me on my lines while we work?
I do ballet and you do modern, the studio's been double-booked so we have to share it.
Please stop practicing your solo song when I'm trying to sleep.
It's the day before opening night and I've lost my voice, you have to nurse this melodramatic ailing actor back to health.
I have a key to the theatre, and sometimes I go there when I need to think. Apparently so do you.
I fell into the orchestra pit and landed on you.
*OR* I fell into the orchestra pit and landed on you. Again.
My new roommate is a tap-dancer/opera singer.
You're the demanding star and I'm your personal assistant.
We both dream of performing on the stage but we're selling ice-creams in the interval instead.
We're broke aspiring actors sharing a tiny apartment in the city.
We went to drama school together, four years later only one of us is famous.
You accidentally chained your bike to mine and I can't leave until you get back au
I'm the tour guide on your fancy package holiday au
We both really want that parking space au
I'm your new neighbor and I'm using your wifi au
I work at the checkout and you're clearly not old enough to buy that au
It's pouring with rain and there's space under your umbrella au
There are loads of empty seats on this train but you chose to sit next to me au
I tried to parallel park and hit your car, do you want my details au
We live across the street from each other and you really need to get some curtains au
I'm an interior decorator and you hired me to fix up your apartment au
We're both actually con-artists trying to scam each other au
You dined and dashed in my restaurant but you left your coat behind au
Please stop picking flowers from my garden au
You left your phone number in the library book I just borrowed au
We turned up to this party wearing the same outfit and you look better in it au
Someone in this building is listening to my favorite song au
I found a USB and it's full of your holiday photographs au
My hamster escaped and I think he went under your door au
You're a rebel by accident cause you get really animated when you talk and hit people in the face leading to fights. Now you just roll with it. I know the truth though.
Totally saw you spray paint the principals car and you'll have to buy me dinner to keep me quiet.
I pretty much live in detention and you're a straight A student here on your first offense. Wanna add another and skip detention with me?
Every time I get in a fight you patch me up but now I'm the one patching you up after your tripped on thin air.
I'm a super tough punk who hates authority. Your parents are cops who have met me more than once but I like you a lot.
Me and my buddies vandalized your backyard trampling your mini garden in the process. Now I feel really shitty cause you're really upset about this. Look I'll help fix it okay just stop with the sad faces.
Accidentally knocked you out when you got caught in the middle of a fist fight between me and this other kid during school. So I sat with you in the nurses office. Shut up! Punks like me have consciouses to you know!
You're always picking fights and I'm the one who has to use my charm and way with words to stop them from getting out of hand.
You're a police officer and I'm constantly in and out of holding/jail and we get to know each other well so sometimes you give me my favorite treats when no ones looking.
I'm always fighting and getting in trouble at school so people avoid me. You frequent the small ice cream shop my parents own and know how kind I am to children and elderly people but I don't realize this.
You give me a piggy back ride (or ride home) after I got out of a brutal fight and can barely stand.
I brought my new kitten to school hold her please while I kick this guys ass.
Punks can get scared of thunder storms too
I saw you on your bike when I was riding my bike and we accidentally just raced for 5 miles and I don't even know who you are but you're really cute AU
I work at Starbucks and every night at 11 PM you come in and order a triple shot espresso I'm actually kind of worried AU
My friend gave me your number and I've been sending you weird texts but you don't know it's me sending them AU
Me and my friends may be terrible at laser tag but before our last game the operator told you that your group would have no trouble beating us and there is absolutely no way we're going down without a fight AU
I was pulling an all-nighter to finish a paper and I accidentally screamed "520 blaze it" at 5:20 in the morning and woke you up AU
You drew a dick on the flyer I posted on the community bulletin board so I crossed it out, but you drew another and it somehow progressed into a full-out war who even are you AU
I'm a teacher and your child is the most obnoxious kid in the entire class you may be cute but you're really shit at parenting AU
I always hide in this one stairwell whenever I'm having a mental breakdown/existential crisis/etc but today when I came here you were already there AU
A friend I barely know brought me to this party but you guys are all just doing drugs and you asked me if I had any so I panicked and gave you my allergy meds but you thought they were real drugs and now you keep on asking me for more of that stuff AU
We accidentally made eye contact from across the room while we were each making out with someone at a party this is really awkward AU
We're at the park and my dog has been intensely humping your leg for a solid 10 minutes and I can't pull him away I'm so sorry about this AU
I overheard you talking about an anime I really like but I'm scared to say anything because I don't want to come off as a giant weeb but I really love that anime AU
I called you out because I thought you were cheating at Words With Friends but it turns out you just have an incredibly extensive vocabulary I'm actually highly impressed AU
You have a lot of piercings and tattoos and just look pretty hardcore in general and I only started dating you so I could piss off my conservative parents but now I think I'm falling for you for real AU
We're in the arcade and I feel really bad for staring but how is it humanly possible to be this bad at video games AU
I'm a private detective hired to follow you, but you're endearingly boring and mostly I just like watching you and oops, I sort of find you adorable.
2:You've been sketching me for half an hour now, and just shuffled up to hand me the finished product and it's TERRIBLE but you just wanted an excuse to talk to me.
4:I'm at an art exhibit and I just badmouthed the art, because I don't get it, okay? And it turns out you're the artist. I'm so sorry, maybe I could get you coffee and you could explain what it was supposed to be?
5:Sorry, this is really weird, but I noticed we have the exact same fandom tattoo, can we just geek out for a moment?
6:You keep buying video tapes from the charity shop I work at. Why do you keep doing that? We sell DVDs. There is a betting pool open on what kind of weirdo you are. I am vaguely concerned. I need answers.
7:We're the only two people who turned up to an underground gig and it should be awkward, but the band is amazing and you asked me to dance and hey, there's nobody watching but us.
8:I accidentally 'liked' one of your photos on Facebook because it came up under my tagged friend's name. I'm not a creeper, though I have just spent the last ten minutes trawling through your albums.
9:You live in the apartment next to me. We're not supposed to have pets, but I KNOW you have a cat. I'll make you a deal, I won't tell, if you let me pet it.
11:You're my favourite fanartist and you did fanart of my fic. So I wrote you a fic in return and now you've done fanart for that. You like all my selfies and comment on all my text posts and I do the same to you, and erm, you just posted that you're going to be in my city? Maybe we could meet up?
12:I was walking home after a late shift at work and caught you graffiting a wall. You were going to run away but I stopped you because I want to see the finished piece, and now you're sort of teaching me as you paint and it's awesome?
12.5:Okay, we totally got arrested for the graffiti but we're sharing a cell and you have paint smeared across your cheek and you look adorable and neither of our friends answered our phone calls to bail us out so it looks like we're here 'til morning.
13:I punched you because I thought you were insulting my friend, but it turns out you know each other and it was an inside joke and I'm so sorry, let me drive you to the hospital?
14:I don't have my hearing aids in, you don't know sign language, and we're stuck in an elevator. Your miming is very funny and adorable though.
15:My friend made me a grindr/tinder profile without me knowing and you liked my profile and then sent me a message which just said 'Bees?' and I'm a little confused but intrigued.
person a is a dance instructor and person b can't dance for shit but their best friend is getting married and insists that the whole wedding party must learn a giant and highly embarassing group dance as well as basic dance styles. person a takes person b on as their personal project.
person a runs the only '50′s style diner in town until person b shows up and opens their own '20′s style diner just down the street with, and loath person a is to admit it, better coffee and even better decorations. battle of the oldie diners ensues as they try to one up each other.
person a works for the local police department with the K-9 unit and person b works are a parademic. both admire the other from afar and all their colleagues remark on how well they pull together as a team under high stress situations. person a gets extremely hurt in one situation and admits to person b their feelings just before they pass out
person a and person b were childhood enemies and fought to one up the other in literally everything they did (dodgeball was deadly). turns out that they both went into training to join the local police force and both become new members. needless to say the competitiveness still takes hold.
person a owns a karaoke bar and person b comes in almost everynight with their group of friends to drunkenly sing david bowie songs. one night person b manages to get person a to sing a song with them and person a kisses them afterwards.
person a works as a dj for a strip club, person b is the new dancer.
person a is a fashion designer and person b is the newest model to the scene that's taking over by storm and will be joining person a's team of models.
person a works at an old diner that is really popular with the local biker gang and they totally have a thing for person b, who is in said biker gang. bonus: person a has to manouver around on rollerblades and constantly falls in front of person b but person b finds it entirely too endearing.
high school au: person a is the nerdy music kid who can play piano and guitar and person b is the dancer kid whom person a has had a crush on since kindergarten. person a writes a song for person b and person a's friends make sure person b is there to hear it.
person a works as a nature photographer and person b is the local expert on all the hiking trails and other beautiful spots of the small town that person a has stumbled upon. they fall in love while hiking around and person a takes just as many pictures of person b as they do of the nature.
we're living in the same flat on campus and you always hog the oven when i need it' AU
'our flats are opposite each other and your kitchen window faces my kitchen so we always see each other making coffee at 3am' AU
'we share a flat and always end up studying in the kitchen at the same time but i'm too shy to make conversation' AU
'we share a flat and you've been stealing my milk for weeks but it's not even my milk its my roommates' AU
'our dorms are next to each other and it's 3am turn your fucking movie volume down' AU
'your friend lives in my flat so you basically live in my kitchen now and you keep eating my food by accident' AU
'you got locked out of your flat and it's raining so i guess i'll let you hang out in my flat until someone comes to help' AU
'we're studying in the library and you have all the books i need for my essay so i'm waiting for you to leave so i can use them' AU
'it's 2am and we're both trying to print our essays out but there's only one printer in this library and it's super slow' AU
'we share a flat and you're a good cook so i keep staring at your food every night until you get the hint and make enough for me' AU
'your flat is next to mine and my oven just broke so i broke into yours to heat up my pizza sorry' AU