How Artemis Fowl Eats a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup
Some of you might remember a while back when they'd show commercials on television showing how different types of people or celebrities ate a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup. Sometimes they could be entertaining, sometimes they were downright stupid. This will probably fall under the latter category, so be warned.
It was a fine, sunny day around mid-springtime, the sort of day perfect for playing outside. So, of course, Artemis Fowl II was hiding away in his room with the curtains drawn, his fingers tapping away at the keys of his laptop as he devised a most evil plan with the sole purpose of obtaining fabulous riches.
He glanced at the clock in the bottom right-hand corner of the computer screen, and decided it was about time for lunch. He strolled down to the kitchen, and sat down without saying anything, expecting to be fed.
Artemis cleared his throat loudly. As though by magic, a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup fell from the sky. Artemis didn't care much for sweets, but food was food and it didn't look as though he was about to get anything decent to eat.
He tore open the wrapper, and was about to bite into it when Butler burst into the kitchen.
"Artemis, no! It could be poisoned!" He seized the glorious nugget of peanut butter coated in smooth, delicious milk chocolate and stuffed the whole thing into his mouth. He chewed thoughtfully for a minute or two, then spat it into his hand.
Artemis was speechless for a moment, and then he cried, "Butler, what is the meaning of this?"
"Oh…Right." Butler said, and he pulled a sandwich out of his pocket and handed it to Artemis. He then walked off, tittering most uncharacteristically.