Because I'm depressed about going to work tomorrow. Also, I think I need to write more sad things. But mostly because I have to go to work tomorrow :(
Rated M for references to sex (shame!)
Friday Mourning
"What's on your mind, Remus?"
It took Remus a moment to realize that Sirius had spoken, despite having Sirius laying next to him on their bed in the dark. They had been that way for so long, the news of the last Death Eater raid hitting them harder than they'd imagined.
Remus turned his head to look at Sirius. "Did you think it was going to be like this? The war…"
Sirius, who had been staring at Remus for any indication that the werewolf was alright, looked away and glared at the ceiling. "No, I didn't. But it's jus the way it has to be, isn't it?"
Remus joined Sirius as they stared at the dark ceiling, the light from their small kitchen being the only source of light in their room. "I just can't believe she's gone."
A young Auror, barely twenty-three, had been killed in that raid. She was truly one of a kind. A nice and funny personality when she was surrounded by Order members but skilled and quick with a wand when on a mission. She reminded Remus of Sirius in many ways, from her dark hair to the her slightly terrifying way of thinking when it was her turn to suggest a way to capture Death Eaters.
Sirius remembered her exactly the way he last saw her. She had told Sirius that he knew about his relationship with Remus and that she found it quite romantic for them to be in the fight together. Sirius knew that if he lived in another realm of reality, he would have probably been attracted to her. But he wasn't, not when Remus was standing next to her and smiling knowingly at Sirius because only he knows exactly why Sirius can't sit comfortably during the meeting.
Now she was dead.
Sirius shrugged. "She liked to get into trouble. You always said she was a lot like me."
It was obviously and not surprisingly the wrong thing to say since Remus sat up fully now, head turned and looking everywhere that wasn't Sirius. That comment was stupid and inconsiderate but so unbelievably true that Remus felt an ache in his chest, one that he pushed down every time Sirius was on a mission.
And it was that ache that made him turn to look at Sirius again because if he didn't say what he wanted to say he never would. "It's just…" It was even more difficult now that Sirius was sitting next to him. "You go off and I have to think about you never coming back, Sirius. You're as stubborn as James' hair but that doesn't mean you'll never…"
"Never die?" prompted Sirius. "I can't assure I'll never get hurt. I might even loose my cock if the prick I'm dueling hates me enough. With or without my cock, I will always come back, Remus."
Remus nodded, smiling a bit as he laid back down again. "Is that promise?"
Feeling the same thing he feels whenever Remus smiles at him, especially in that position, Sirius placed himself on top of Remus to simply feel all warmth and hard muscle. "I promise to always come back to you, mate. Even if I have to come back to your frightening face and eat your shitty food. I'll come back to your unhealthy kink to have music on while we have sex sometimes. Not even Azkaban will keep me from you."
When Remus nodded this time, it was less unsure and more confident because if Sirius said it, then it was true. "What are you thinking about, Sirius?"
Sirius chose to stare at Remus for a couple of minutes, enough time to make the werewolf underneath him feel a bit uncomfortable by just simply staring. Then, when Remus began to move, Sirius leaned down to whisper into his ear, "I'm thinking about how much I would like to kiss you right now. I would kiss you until you forget about what happened today. I was thinking about how much I would love to suck you off and that it would make you forget about our conversation. Then, I think it would be wise if I fucked you. You're stressed, which means that you'll most probably want it rough. I'll fuck you hard and you'll only think of me the whole time. Do you understand, Remus?"
And Sirius sliding down Remus' body, grinning as he kissed the skin on Remus' abdomen was not the reason why he said, "Yes."
I've missed you guys though :D
R/R