Castle is wrapped firmly around her back. Castle. Richard Castle. Okay, yeah, that's going to take some getting used to.
The room is dim with the rising sunlight. The window must be cracked open because there's a breeze that sneaks in toying with the curtains that are pulled closed against the morning. The gentle flapping and his steady breathing is all she can hear. The lack of traffic below speaks to the early hour that she has woken. Much too early of an hour considering. Her body is protesting – sore ribs, braids of muscle in her arms aching. Her back, where his body is pressed, yearns to be stretched. She doesn't dare move.
She's not sure what awaits them this morning. It's a little awkward, she thinks. The man behind her is Castle. The thought is both calming and troubling somehow. She's nervous, as silly as it seems. She rationalizes that he'd been everywhere last night. Certainly seen her at her most vulnerable. This would be the easy part, right?
She thanks her own foresight last night. When she had escaped to the bathroom, she'd grabbed a tee from his dresser to cover herself from the chill. She's glad she has it now, facing the clear light of morning. Adding a little bit of normalcy to a very new situation.
Despite the thread of nerves that slowly start to build in her stomach, the cocoon she's wrapped in is so warm and just so safe that she's not sure she ever wants to move. She smiles when she remembers how they got here. The slow and steady build the night before. How sure they'd both been. Equally nervous and excited and just a little bit hesitant to peel off these new layers.
It was actually nothing like she thought it would be. Never did she think it would be quite so intense – so serious. She never thought she'd end up at his door, soaked from the rain, professing her want for him. She'd always imagined him as the pursuer – as the initiator.
He snores lightly behind her. Castle. The whole thing seems so surreal.
She'd truly been an emotional mess last night. For the first time in as long as she can remember, wearing her heart on her sleeve – saying and doing exactly what was on her mind, all of the overwhelming emotions pouring out of her in spouts of love and heartache, apology and thankfulness. And then there were tears. So, so many tears.
She feels like maybe she should be embarrassed for breaking down on him late last night as she came down from the high of their initial union. Collapsing against him in an upheaval of emotions. Hormones out of whack. The turmoil that soared through her when the adrenaline wore off. The ugly sobs that wracked her body after they had truly consummated their relationship.
Words punctuated with her tears, telling him of her day. Of the fight, the resigning, of not truly knowing her place anywhere anymore except right here. Right here, she had kept saying.
And tucked into his side, her tears sliding down his neck, he had echoed her proclamation, whispering his own, right here, in a suspiciously broken voice.
He alerts her that he's awake by silently running his hand gently up and down her arm. She smiles at the feel of it - at the emotion behind it.
"Good morning," she says, sleep still lacing her voice.
"Best morning," he returns grinning into her hair.
"You always have to one-up me don't you?"
He laughs. The vibration in his chest rocking her back. Infusing her body with an ease to ail the nerves.
She has the sudden urge to face him - to see him. She turns with a slight grimace, noticing him backing up slightly to accommodate the move. His eyes, watching hers with a bit of a frown.
"How are you feeling this morning?" He asks as his eyes dart around her face, inspecting. Hand gently kneading her arm.
"A little sore. Not too bad."
"Not too bad, huh? In Beckett speak that means pretty terrible doesn't it?"
She smiles and takes stock of her body. Grimacing at the pain that has coursed through her at the small movement. "A little, yeah."
He looks unsure. Apologetic almost. "Last night probably didn't help."
"Didn't hurt," she assures. "This helps." She motions to his hand rubbing her arm. He doubles his efforts bringing his second hand in to assist. Gently massaging the sore muscles.
His eyes dart around her body. "Ribs okay? Do you need to get them checked out?"
"Paramedics cleared me yesterday. Just bruised. I'll heal."
He nods. Frowning as if replaying the fight she'd endured on the roof.
She's overcome with the need to assure him. Tries to meet his roaming eyes. "Hey, I'm okay. Really."
He nods, attempting to gather up a comforting smile.
She leans in experimentally and kisses him softly on the mouth. This is all so new. A kiss just because she wants to. Neither an igniting or ignited kiss. Just a whisper of truth. A word unspoken. Casual and confident; new and sweet.
It must hit him equally as deep. Spirits seemingly on the upswing as his soft smile lights up his eyes. She grins. "Coffee could help too."
He groans childishly in dismay, sliding his leg between hers, curling himself further into her. "Don't wanna get up yet," he pouts.
She smiles and doesn't even comment on his antics. "Okay." She squeezes his leg between her own, securing him closer to her. Nestling deeper into her pillow, eyes closing in pleasure as his thumbs work the strained muscle in her arm.
She can feel his eyes on her and she opens them back up to find his smiling face beaming down at her.
"What?" she asks.
"Thought you'd put up more of a fight."
She squeezes his leg once more in response. "I'm happy here too."
He hand travels up her arm, cupping her cheek as he leans in, grin meeting grin in a much deeper, giddy kiss. As the smiles fade and intentions begins changing, he pulls away, hand traveling down her side resting gently on her ribs in memory. Thumb brushing carefully over the shirt covering the bruised flesh and then traveling back up to her face.
He meets her eyes. "I'm happy you're here. Happy you came to my door last night."
"Me too." She raises her hand to grasp his wrist right below where he cups her cheek. Her thumb running through the soft hair on his arm.
He seems to melt a little, eyes flickering across her face. "Beckett, you make me such a sap."
She laughs, a smile pulling broadly across her face.
"Beautiful woman in my bed and all I want to do is stare."
She rolls her eyes to disguise the pink tinging her cheeks. Turns and kisses his hand. Bites gently at the fleshy palm.
His eyes darken a bit and she grins mischievously. "Okay, not all I want to do, but I'm pretty damn content right now."
He leans in and gently takes her mouth again but she's having none of his softness. She pulls him in closer, hand traveling to his shoulder and she hitches her leg higher on his hip.
He groans out a reminder. "Ribs."
"Ways around that, Castle," she manages between kisses that he has deliberately slowed. Works to speed them up again.
He grunts his approval and grasps at her hips as she rolls him to his back. "Oh god, I don't even want to attempt to argue with that."
The air-dried clothes are stiff and uncomfortable on her skin. Her body hums with achey throbs and the coffee in front of her is still a bit too hot to fully enjoy. None of this even dampens the happiness she feels - two hands cradling the almost too-hot coffee cup, eyes on the ridiculously adorable man beside her.
They sit side by side on the stools in his kitchen nursing their respective coffees. His body is turned towards her and his foot rests on the rungs on her stool. Her crossed legs position her barefoot at his calf and she gently rubs back and forth against the denim.
"Ouch," he says for probably the hundredth time in all of three minutes. "Still hot."
She smirks. "Since you tried ten seconds ago? Shocking."
"Hush. My body needs this caffeine and its enticing aroma is being such a tease to my vulnerable senses. What an evil vixen you are," he speaks to his cup.
She barks out a laugh. "Seriously?"
He grins, meeting her eyes, bringing up the cup to inhale the rising steam. His eyes close as he sighs dramatically.
She shakes her head smiling, taking care to thoroughly blow the steam from her cup before taking a tiny experimental sip. "It is quite delicious."
He just hums, watching her with a deliriously happy look on his face.
She nods to his coffee. "Stop staring and just blow on it."
His eyes widen and he theatrically moves his hand to his chest is feigned awe. "Why Beckett, this is awfully forward of you but I accept." He quickly moves in a presses a loud raspberry against her neck.
She shrieks and attempts a glare that doesn't quite make it past her grin. "The coffee, Castle."
He gives her his most innocent look. "Oh, you should have said so."
She playfully swipes at the wetness his mouth left behind. "Ridiculous man."
He smiles and places his left hand on her leg as the other dutifully brings the coffee up to blow.
The silence is comfortable and she almost hums in contentedness. "You sure I can't make you any breakfast?"
She takes one hand down to cover his. "I'm anxious to get into some other clothes. Maybe even take a bath." She squeezes his hand. "Plus Alexis will be back soon and I should probably-" She motions with her head to the door. "-Before then."
"You really don't have to. She'll be happy that you're here."
She smiles. "And I appreciate that. I would just rather not do the walk of shame in front of your daughter."
His eyes search hers out. "She knows how I feel about you. No shame."
She gestures to her clothes. "I'd rather make my debut in a little more suitable clothes. Makeup and less sex hair would be nice as well."
"Aw, sex hair works so well on you." He smiles and brings his hand up to push a strand behind her ear.
"Sweet, but I'm not sure your daughter will feel the same way."
Castle grimaces. "Fair point."
"I just want her to be okay with this. I'd like to make a good first impression as your-" She pauses, unsure. "-More than friend?"
He laughs. "Girlfriend?"
She raises her eyebrow. "It sounds so -"
"Inadequate."
She grins with a blush. "I was going to say juvenile."
He smiles at her and she can't help but lean in for a kiss.
He pulls back slightly, foreheads still together. Watches her carefully with his next words. "Do you mind if I talk to her today? Tell her that-" He pauses with hesitance finding his next words. "-Things have changed with us?"
She gives a soft smile at his self-doubt. "Of course not. She's going to find out sooner or later because I'm not going away." She takes a deep breath. "I'm in this with you, Castle. It's scary as hell, but we're actually doing this."
The words leave him beaming. He leans back, self-assured. "She's going to be happy for us."
"I hope so."
"She will. Don't worry about her."
She sighs. "Castle, if not-"
"Nope. Don't even think it. It's all going to okay."
"I hope you're right."
Without an ounce of doubt, he replies immediately. "I'm right."
She nods. Can't help but feel a little relieved.
He softens. "Hey, you going to be okay today? When Alexis comes home, maybe I can come over? Keep you company?"
She senses his obligations tearing at him. "Why don't you call me, okay? I'm probably just going to be recuperating. Spend some time with Alexis. I could use some rest anyway."
He nods silently. His hands brush down her sides, grazing her ribs gently.
She watches the concern grow in his eyes. "I'll be okay."
He nods, meets her eyes again. "Come back over tonight for dinner?"
She smiles. "See how your talk goes first. Let me know."
"But you will?"
She takes a deep breath, nodding. "If all goes well, yes."
He grins happily. "Good."
She looks down at her watch reluctantly. "I should probably go."
He nods and straightens. He goes around to the other side and pulls down a travel mug. "I can't let you leave without a coffee."
"You aren't going to hear me argue about that."
He splashes some creamer in and pours some fresh coffee into the cup. Securing the lid, he walks back over to her. "I'll walk you down."
She smiles at the gesture and even more so at the realization that she doesn't have any desire to contend it. She welcomes it. Puts her hand out for him to grab.
As they reach the door, she pauses. "Before we go out there, I just want to -" The words trail off as she brings her hand up to his face, pulling him closer and kissing him sweetly. "Thank you, Castle."
Their placement, almost identical to the night before, doesn't seem to go unnoticed by either.
Castle leans back slightly, eyes roaming her face. "You never have to thank me for loving you."
The words stick somewhere around her chest and she nods. Takes in the sincerity of his face and can't stop the tears that start to well in her eyes.
Before they can take over, she takes a deep breath in preparation to face the end of this night and the beginning of this new life. She opens the door and pauses, re-acclimating herself to the world that awaits them on the outside.
She grabs his hand and lightly tugs. "Let's go."