Disclaimer: I own nothing related to PLL or its characters.

So this wacky little one shot came from a crazy dream I had last night. I couldn't get it out of my head so here it is.

Like everything else I'm writing at the moment, this takes place in my Mermaid universe, approximately 7 years after Mama Bear.

This is probably the tamest and shortest story I've ever written.

It's late. I'm tired. I think I caught all the typos. If anyone sees anything glaring, please let me know. Otherwise I'll reread tomorrow and fix anything that might have slipped by.

Thanks again, as always, for reading and reviewing.

Hope you all enjoy.

I Guess That's Why They Call it the Blues

"Her hair is blue!" Alison screeched as she paced, throwing her hands up in the air in exasperation. "Emily, our fifteen year old daughter's hair is blue."

Emily looked up from the sports medical journal she was reading and looked at her wife over her glasses, sighing because Alison had been on a rampage, virtually nonstop, since Kaylee had come home from school that afternoon with her long blonde hair dyed blue.

"Ali, you really need to calm down about this."

"Calm down," Alison screeched again as she stopped pacing in front of the sofa and glared at her mermaid. "You did not just tell me to calm down, Em. Why am I the only one out of my mind about this?"

Dinner in the Fields' household this evening had been epic. Alison and Kaylee argued through the entire meal about Alison taking the girl to the salon in the morning to dye her hair back to her normal color and Kaylee resolutely refused, saying she was old enough, now, to choose what she did with her hair.

Ten year old Kyle thought the entire thing was hilarious and cracked jokes throughout the meal, earning glares from one mother and quiet, stern reprimands from the other. And little six year old Lily just kept telling her big sister how pretty she looked with hair the same color as mama's eyes.

Finally, Alison banished Kaylee to her room, for which everyone else in the family was grateful, because it meant they would stop snapping at each other.

Realizing Alison was not going to calm down about this any time soon, Emily put her book down and took off her glasses, tossing them on the table as she sat forward. "Come here," she held her hand out to her wife, beckoning the blonde to come sit beside her.

Alison continued scowling but she walked over and sat beside her mermaid, refusing to take her hand. But Emily would not be deterred and grasped Alison's fingers and pulled her hand onto her lap.

"Of course I'm not happy about this, Ali," Emily said calmly as she gently stroked Alison's fingers. "But screeching like a banshee isn't going to change it and is just going to wake Kyle and Lily."

"Her hair is blue," Alison said again as if Emily was not fully aware that their daughter's beautiful golden blonde hair was not now the color of the sky.

"Aria had a pink streak in her hair when she was that age," Emily offered and Alison scowled at her.

"A pink streak," the blonde emphasized the word. "A streak I could handle, but her whole freaking head is blue."

"It's not ideal," Emily agreed. "But it's not the end of the world either, Alison."

"Who are you and what have you done with my straight laced wife?" Alison snapped as she glared at the brunette.

"Straight isn't something I have ever been accused of being, love," Emily teased and she squeezed Alison's fingers gently as she leaned in and pressed a soft kiss to Alison's lips.

Alison frowned, not at all amused by Emily's attempt at humor.

"This isn't funny, Em. They're going to have to strip her hair to get that color out and she had such beautiful hair," Alison sighed, heartbroken. "It's going to ruin it and they'll probably have to cut it off."

Emily shrugged. "So, they cut it off. Her hair will grow back."

"She's going to hate cutting her hair off," Alison said, knowing Kaylee loved her long hair.

"Well it will serve her right then," Emily said with no remorse.

Alison sighed heavily. "She did this to get back at me. I know she did."

"Why would she do something like that?" Emily asked.

"Because she resents me," Alison said as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

"She doesn't resent you, Ali," Emily reassured her wife as she reached up and caressed Alison's cheek tenderly.

Alison's eyes fluttered softly at her wife's gentle touch, but she refused to let herself be distracted. "Yes, she does," the blonde insisted. "She resents how I've come down on her lately. But she was getting too wild, Em. Too much like me at that age and I had to shut that shit down. I will not let her become like me."

"Sweetheart," Emily tried to soothe her agitated wife. "She's just acting like a typical teenager. She's testing the boundaries and seeing what we'll let her get away with and what we won't."

"Well, she's reached the limit," Alison growled, grasping Emily's fingers and tugging them down to her lap again.

"She's a good kid, Ali. Yeah, she can channel your teen Alison attitude from time to time, but she is nothing like you when you were at your worst."

Alison scowled over at the woman she loved more than life. "If you're trying to make me feel better, you're doing a pretty crappy job of it, you know."

Emily laughed as she leaned back, tugging Alison with her. She pulled her wife to her side as she wrapped her arm around her. Alison sighed and settled against her wife.

"Sometimes you're too calm, Em. It drives me crazy when you're this calm about things like this."

Emily smiled. "You get agitated enough for both of us."

"I told you a long time ago, she and I were going to clash like this. I warned you," Alison reminded her wife of their talk when Kaylee was only eight. "Should I go talk to her?" Alison asked.

Emily shook her head. "No, she's probably already asleep and I think any kind of conversation you try to have with her tonight will just end with the two of you fighting again. Tomorrow's soon enough."

Emily slid her fingers up the back of Alison's head, threading them through the soft strands. She gently massaged the back of Alison's scalp and the blonde's eyes fell closed as she leaned her head back into Emily's hand, sighing softly.

"That's it, love," Emily encouraged softly as she felt Alison's body relax. She turned her wife's face and pressed her mouth to Alison's, gently sliding her tongue along the seam of Alison's lips, silently requesting access.

Alison hiccupped softly as she opened her mouth, granting it, and her tongue pressed forward to meet Emily's, beginning a long, slow, deep meeting and caressing of tongues and lips.

The kiss was soft and soothing and was a balm to Alison's soul. She whimpered softly as she turned her body slightly and pressed against her mermaid, reaching up and caressing Emily's cheek.

"Mmmm," Alison murmured as their lips parted, but their mouths lingered as they both panted softly.

"I've been kissing you for almost thirty years and I still love it as much as I did when I was eighteen," Alison breathed as her eyes fluttered open.

Emily chuckled softly as her soft eyes met Alison's, so full of love even after all these years.

"That's a good thing," Emily whispered as she pressed another soft but brief kiss against her wife's lips. "Because you're going to be kissing me for thirty more, if I have anything to say about it."

"I want to kiss you for the rest of my life," Alison smiled, her eyes soft and earnest. "I love you, Em," she said softly, urgently, needing her wife to know, even though the blonde knew there was no doubt in Emily's mind how she felt.

"I love you too, sweetheart," Emily gently brushed her nose against Alison's before she pulled back, sitting back and tucking Alison against her side.

Alison rested her head on Emily's shoulder and closed her eyes. After several minutes of sitting silently, watching the fire in the fireplace, Alison's lips curved into a seductive smile.

She turned her face and nuzzled Emily's cheek.

"So," she purred softly. "You wanna make out some more?"

Emily laughed and she turned her body to face her wife. Alison's eyes darkened and she also turned to face her mermaid. Her fingers grasped Emily's shirt and the blonde tugged, pulling Emily over her as she lay back on the sofa cushions. Alison captured her wife's lips as the brunette settled on top of her.

And what started out as some playful kissing and caressing soon turned into something that made both women very happy that all their children were tucked safely in bed and would never see.

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Kaylee tiptoed up the three steps and onto the deck. She just had to make it across the wood platform without her mothers' seeing her through the wall of windows that encompassed the back of the house.

She made it more than halfway across; convinced she was in the clear, when she heard her mother's steady voice ten feet to her right.

"Stop right there, young lady."

Kaylee cringed and turned her head to see Emily Fields sitting at the table beside the pool. She was in her pajamas, a glass of wine in her hand, and her eyebrow was arched as she looked narrowly at her eldest child.

"You know, that emergency rope ladder is supposed to be used in case of a fire, not so you can sneak out after your mother grounds you."

Kaylee sighed. She was busted and there was no way out of it. She shrugged her shoulders and walked over to sit in the chair beside her mother.

"Where were you?" Emily asked, and because she could practically see the wheels turning in her daughter's head she warned. "And be careful how you answer that question because you don't want to add lying to your list of infractions today."

Kaylee sighed. "I had a date with Aiden tonight."

"And what does he think of your hair?" Emily asked curiously.

"He thinks it's hot," Kaylee replied as she grinned, clearly completely unrepentant. "How did you even know I left?"

"Because I went to your room to talk to you after your mother went to bed."

"Does she know?" Kaylee asked and Emily heard the slight hint of fear in her daughter's tone. She knew her mother well.

"No, she was already in bed and I didn't feel it was necessary to wake and worry her after I tracked your phone and saw you were at the movie theater."

Kaylee scowled. "If you knew where I was, why did you ask me? Were you trying to trap me?"

"No," Emily replied as she took a sip of her wine. "I was giving you the opportunity to come clean and I'm proud of you for telling the truth."

"Is it going to help me at all?" Kaylee asked curiously.

"Nope," Emily replied succinctly. "You're grounded for a month now."

Kaylee sighed dramatically. "Figures. Can I go to bed now?"

"No," Emily said for the third time. "I want to talk to you about your hair. Your mom is very upset about this, Kaylee, we both are."

"She totally wigged out about it," Kaylee smiled impishly. "It was fabulous."

"There is nothing fabulous about upsetting your mother," Emily scolded as she frowned.

"I knew she'd lose it a little bit, but she far exceeded my expectations."

Emily narrowed her eyes, disappointment filling her at her daughter's insensitive behavior and her clear pleasure at upsetting Alison.

"Kaylee we've never hindered and have always encouraged your creativity and individuality and self expression, but you really took it too far this time."

"It's not a big deal, mom."

"It is a big deal," Emily insisted. "If you wanted blue hair, fine. We would never have liked it but we could have talked about it and maybe come to some kind of compromise on it. But you did it without consulting us or even letting us know you were going to do it."

"It's my hair."

"Yes, but your hair is still on your only fifteen years old body. A body which lives in our house. And we give you a lot of freedom and autonomy for a kid your age, but if you're going to take advantage of it like this, we're going to have to tighten the reins."

Kaylee rolled her eyes. "God, it was just a joke. The two of you have absolutely no sense of humor."

Emily shook her head in irritation. "There is nothing funny about dying your hair blue, Kaylee. I don't understand you sometimes. You had beautiful hair, like your mothers, and now you've ruined it."

"I haven't ruined it, mom," Kaylee replied exasperated. "It's a temporary dye. It will wash out in five to six washings. You do know what day it is today, right?"

Now Emily was pissed. Alison had been right. Kaylee had deliberately done this just to get a rise of her mother.

"What are you talking about? And why wouldn't you just tell us it was temporary at dinner. You could have saved all of us from your mother's wrath."

"Mom, it's April first," Kaylee shot a "duh" look at her mother. "Happy April Fool's day."

Emily narrowed her eyes and she growled. "Okay, you know what, you're grounded for two months now."

"Hey, that's not fair, it was a joke," Kaylee complained.

"Well guess what? It wasn't a funny one."

All of a sudden Kaylee screamed as a stream of water hit the back of her head. Emily turned and stood up abruptly, ready to charge and protect her daughter at all costs, only to see her wife standing on the steps with a hose in her hand.

Kaylee jumped up and sputtered as more water hit her as Alison aimed the hose at her daughter, twirling it so the stream didn't hit her hard, but did soak the girl completely.

"So, the dye will wash out with five to six washings, huh?" Alison asked as she scowled. "Why don't I just help you with that then?"

"Alison, what the hell are you doing?" Emily asked, completely shocked.

"Mom, cut it out. That's freaking cold," Kaylee cried out as she hopped around, trying to dodge the water stream but Alison kept following her.

"Ali, stop it," Emily commanded as she started toward Alison, but the blonde flicked the hose in her direction quickly.

"Don't make me use this on you too, Em, because I will," she warned her wife.

Emily would have been seriously worried if she hadn't seen the smirk tugging at her wife's lips.

"Mom, seriously, cut it out," Kaylee yelled as she tried to hide behind the table.

The sound of her shrieks brought Pepe charging and barking from inside the house. The dog broke through the sliding glass door screen and ran straight over to Kaylee, sliding across the wet deck and into the table leg.

"Pepe, be quiet," Emily demanded but the dog just continued to bark as she tried to jump into the stream of water, clearly thinking this was a game.

"Kaylee, jump in the pool," Emily told her and the girl immediately followed her mother's instructions, diving into the pool to escape her other mother's wrath.

Alison pouted. "What did you do that for? I was just getting started."

"Ali, put the hose down," Emily said calmly and Alison turned off the water, although Emily could see she was disappointed.

Kaylee surfaced from under the water laughing hysterically.

Pepe jumped into the pool with Kaylee and Emily groaned. "No, Pepe."

"What is the penalty in this state for murdering your child?" Alison asked her wife calmly.

"I don't know," Emily replied suspiciously. "Life in prison, I guess."

"So, California isn't a death penalty state?"

"No," Emily replied again, this time cautiously.

"Good. Because I can handle life in prison. As long as we get conjugal visits," Alison said as she tilted her head and smirked at her wife.

"Oh, this is so priceless," Kaylee giggled from the pool as she and Pepe splashed around now. "Aunt Kira is going to love this."

"What the hell does that mean?" Alison whipped her head to look at her daughter. "Did she know about this?" Alison growled, her voice dangerous.

"She helped me with it," Kaylee admitted as she kept chuckling.

Alison looked at Emily, who just shook her head in disbelief. This day couldn't get any more surreal if it tried.

"She's dead to me," Alison said, making both Emily and Kaylee laugh, but Alison didn't find it funny.

"I'm serious, she's dead to me."

"Haven't you told her that more than once over the years, mom?" Kaylee asked and Alison glared at her daughter.

"I mean it this time."

"Can I get out of the pool, now?" Kaylee asked as she looked back and forth between her moms.

"Yes," Emily said as she grabbed a towel off the outdoor towel rack beside the pool. "You're going to get sick if you don't get dried off."

Kaylee rose out of the water and took the towel from Emily. Pepe climbed out of the pool too and shook her body, water splashing over all three of them.

"Pepe," Emily scolded the dog but it was useless. They were all soaked now. "Get in the house and take a hot shower to warm up," the doctor in Emily instructed her daughter.

"Mom," a sleepy voice came from the direction of the sliding glass doors. Emily looked over to see Kyle, with little Lily, standing in the doorway holding hands, both yawning as they looked at the scene with sleepy eyes. "I heard Kaylee scream," he said as he looked worriedly at his sister.

"It's alright, baby," Alison said soothingly in her mom voice. "Kaylee decided to take a swim but the water was cold and startled her.

Kaylee and Emily looked at each other and shook their heads and Alison glared at both of them, daring them to contradict her.

"Why do you have a hose in your hand?" he asked curiously.

"I was watering the flowers," Alison replied smoothly.

"At eleven o'clock at night?" he asked, clearly not believing her.

Emily walked over and picked Lily up in her arms. "Come, on, sweetie, let's get you back to bed," she said to the little girl as she started to walk inside. "You too, Kyle. Everything is alright, now come back to bed."

Kyle looked back and forth between his sister and his mom until Alison arched an eyebrow at him. "You heard your mom, Kyle. Back to bed."

He shrugged as she turned to walk back inside. "You guys are crazy," he said under his breath as he followed his mom up the stairs to his bedroom.

Alison grabbed another towel off the rack and handed it to Kaylee. Her anger at her daughter had dissipated once she let loose with the hose.

"You got me really good, kid," Alison admitted reluctantly, but her voice held a twinge of pride in it.

Kaylee grinned as she nodded her head in agreement.

"You're still grounded though," Alison warned as she sank down on one of the only dry chairs, intending to wait for Emily, who she knew was going to come back and lay into her for losing her mind. The blonde was grateful that at least she got laid earlier because it probably wasn't going to happen again for a while.

"It was totally worth it," Kaylee said as she sat on the chair beside her mother and Alison had to admire her tenacity.

"And the cost of fixing the screen door is coming out of your allowance," Alison said, the look in her eye broaching no room for argument.

"I figured as much," Kaylee smirked as she patted Pepe's head where the dog now sat beside her. "Again, totally worth it."

"And you're giving Pepe a bath tomorrow," Alison added for good measure as she looked at the drenched dog.

"Okay," the young girl agreed before she stood up. "I'm gonna take a hot shower and go to bed."

"Take Pepe and dry her off too."

"Come on Pepe," Kaylee called and the dog rose to her feet and followed as Kaylee started to walk away.

"Kaylee," Alison said and the young girl turned back and looked at her mother. "Don't ever sneak out of this house again."

It was both a warning and a plea, from a mother who would not survive if anything happened to her child.

'You heard that part too, huh?" Kaylee said, not at all surprised her mom heard the entire conversation.

Alison nodded silently and waited for Kaylee to reply.

"Okay," the girl agreed again and she smiled as she walked over to where her mother sat. Kaylee wrapped her arms around Alison's neck from behind and pressed a kiss to the top of her mother's head. "I love you, mom. No hard feelings, huh?"

Alison scowled and she resisted the urge to both kiss and kill her child.

"Go to bed, Kaylee, before I change my mind and turn that hose back on you."

Kaylee laughed and kissed the top of Alison's head once more, and then she released her mother and turned to walk again.

"Kaylee," Alison said her name again just before the girl stepped into the house.

"Yeah?"

"I love you, too," Alison said softly, making the blue haired girl smile.

Alison sighed as she looked out, past the pool, to the outline of the shore beyond. The sounds from inside her house, wafting out the open windows from the floors above, filled her ears.

The sound of Emily's voice as she tried, rather unsuccessfully, to get Lily back into bed.

The sound of Kyle's voice as he kept peppering Emily with questions about what really happened.

And the sound of the shower turning on as her first child, the child that changed her life, the child that was so much like her that it almost drove Alison to madness, followed her mother's instructions for once.

And Alison was grateful that said child was safely under her and Emily's roof again. Although she and her mermaid were going to have words for why Emily didn't wake her when she discovered Kaylee missing.

At least Alison wasn't the only one in trouble.

As she waited for her wife to return to her, Alison laughed under her breath because life in the Fields' household would never be dull.

The End