Rain was pounding down on the windscreen. It was the very first thing that Erin had noticed when she finally opened her eyes. She couldn't even remember closing them at all. Her eyelids were the heaviest that she had ever felt them. There was a voice in the back of her pounding head that told her that it would be better to go back to sleep, but the brunette forced herself to ignore it and stay awake. She tried to concentrate on the sheet of water that was covering the glass in front of her. It was almost soothing. She wasn't entirely sure what had happened. Her thoughts couldn't settle long enough for her to realise where she was but from the moment that she had regained consciousness, a feeling set deep within her told her that something terrible had happened. The taste of blood in her mouth alone was enough to make her stomach turn. Her head was spinning and her ears were ringing but all she could focus on was the rain.
It didn't take long for it all to come back to her. A wave of memories swept through her head in one quick motion. The majority of it was hazy. She could remember talking to Jay on her cell phone and the car behind her beeping. She could remember racing to find Voight. She could remember trying to talk him out of doing what he was doing. She had tried to talk him out of getting revenge - out of murdering the man that killed Justin.
Justin.
Erin couldn't think about him. It was too painful.
She could remember it raining there too - back where she had given up on Voight and gotten back into her car. The mud had squelched beneath her feet. The look that he had given the brunette was burned into her mind. It was enough for her to realise that there was no getting through to him. The thing that had shocked her more than anything was the way that he had spoken to her. Erin couldn't remember much more than that.
The sound of a car alarm to her left penetrated her thoughts and brought her back to reality. She had barely heard it before. It was strange. It was as though it hadn't even been there before - as if she were the only person in the whole world. The blue lights at the top of her windscreen were flashing again. They caught her attention next. They must have switched on by accident in the crash.
The crash. She had crashed the car. Or rather, someone had crashed into her. Erin couldn't remember.
She was bleeding somewhere. Her head. Blood was dripping over her eye and down her cheek. It was on her lips. She couldn't get the metallic taste off of her tongue. Erin pushed away the airbag that was pressed up against her chest with her right hand, carefully trying to avoid the wet patches of red that were covering the once white surface. Not that having a little blood on her hands would have made any difference given her current state. She had never liked the sight of her own blood. Other people's blood she could handle, but never her own. Her stomach flipped at the sight of it.
The door had crumpled inwards, cramming itself against her hip, but she couldn't feel anything at all. She assumed that the metal was pinning down her legs too. They had gone numb. She couldn't feel them at all. The brunette tried not to panic as she realised that she was trapped. Help would come. She took a deep breath and scanned the interior of the car for her cell phone but she couldn't find it.
The pain in her head was growing more intense with every passing moment but the dizziness had faded almost completely. Erin was grateful for that much. She attempted to feel her forehead for a cut with her left hand but regretted the movement immediately. She hadn't felt it before. Her shoulder was agonising. "Fuck." She could barely move her arm more than a few inches in any direction without pain shooting up to her shoulder. It wasn't easy to see underneath her jacket but Erin was sure that it was dislocated. She could practically feel it hanging out of it's socket.
"Can you hear me?" a voice called suddenly. "Are you okay?"
Erin turned her head sharply, grimacing slightly as she searched for the source of the noise, and let out a deep breath that she didn't even realise she was holding in. It hurt every single time she moved. It didn't matter if it was the tiniest of movements. It was torture. She could only make out a dark figure at the other side of the window, but she couldn't see much more than that. It was a man. She could tell that much from his voice. The stranger tugged on the handle of the door a few times, yanking so hard on his last attempt that Erin thought he was going to pull it off altogether, but it didn't open. It didn't even move.
"I'm here," Erin tried to shout back. "I'm okay. I'm here."
He let go off it suddenly. At least he had heard her. He cupped his hands against the blacked out window and attempted to gaze in. Before she could say anything else, the stranger jogged round to the front of the car and then the passenger's side. The door opened with ease. Erin could see his face clearly now. At a push he could have been a few years younger than her but he looked more like early-twenties. His dark hair was plastered to his forehead, wet from the rain outside that he had been stuck in, and his eyes were wide. His nose looked broken. A mixture of water and blood was dribbling down his chin but he seemed not to notice. There was a dark circle growing under his eye that would no doubt transform into a black eye by the end of the night. He looked like a deer caught in the headlights.
"I am so sorry," he cried and slid into the passenger's seat, closing the door behind him so that, unlike him, the inside of the car wouldn't get soaked. He continued rambling when Erin didn't reply. "It was an accident. I swear. I didn't mean...I mean, I don't even know what happened back there. I am so sorry. I've already called 911. They should be here soon."
Erin paused for a second. She wanted to be angry at him. She wanted to hate him and tell him that he was an asshole that could have gotten them both killed but all she could think about was the pain that she was feeling in her body. He wasn't even drunk. At least, she couldn't smell anything off of him. She wasn't sure what it was about him but she just couldn't be mad. He was hurt to. The brunette had to take steady breaths through her gritted teeth to stop herself from crying out.
"It's okay," she replied breathily, spreading a tight smile across her lips in a pathetic attempt to reassure the younger man.
"It is definitely not okay. I took my eyes off of the road for like a split second, and then the rain...I am so sorry. You're bleeding pretty badly. It's my fault." He pulled his hoodie off quickly, unzipping it quickly with his shaking hands, and turned it inside out before messily bundling it up and softly pressing it against the cut that was above her eyebrow. He cringed as she suddenly hissed, wincing at the feeling of the wet fabric against her injury. He returned her smile apologetically. "Sorry."
"It's fine, don't worry about it," Erin said, encouraging him to put more pressure on her head with her uninjured hand. She took a few short breaths, trying to ease the pain and not panic him, but with each inhale it felt as though her seatbelt was constricting her more and more. She turned her attention back to him. "Are you okay?"
"I think my nose is broken but that's nothing. I played hockey as a kid. You name a bone, I've probably broken it," he joked, pulling away the material to inspect the wound. "The ambulance should be here by now."
"I played a little rough as a kid too," Erin replied. He smiled again though his eyes were still wide. "Can you see if you can unclip my seatbelt?"
"Yeah," he nodded and moved closer to her but he couldn't get it to come loose. "I think it's jammed."
"Great," Erin sighed and closed her eyes. The same feeling was coming over her as before. All she wanted to do was go to sleep and get away from this mess. Everything would be better if she went to sleep. There would be no more anxious kid sitting next to her. There would be no more pain.
"You have to stay awake. No walking towards the friendly white light," he chuckled nervously, shaking her arm gently and forcing her to look back to him again. "Don't fall asleep. That was the one thing they always taught us if we hit our heads. Help will be here soon. I'm sorry about all of this."
Erin blinked a few times in an attempt to focus her eyes again. She replied, "you have to stop apologising so much." He shrugged his shoulders a little. "Just talk to me about something."
It wasn't just for her sake. Talking would calm them both down. Hopefully. "About what?"
"Anything at all," she said, shrugging ever so slightly with her good shoulder. "What's your name?"
"Justin."
In that moment, Erin could have sworn that her heart stopped beating altogether. She had to look away from him. The brunette looked away from him as quickly as she could, pushing the pain away, and made herself stare out of the window. There were even more lights flashing now. A lot of people must have stopped at the scene. They would be standing on the sidewalk waiting for gore to tell their friends about, or at least to feel better about themselves for staying - as though them being there made any difference at all. It didn't make her feel better. Thinking about Justin wasn't going to make her feel better either.
"What's wrong?" Justin asked, panic rising in his voice.
"Nothing. It's okay." She wasn't going to tell him what was going on in her head. She wasn't going to tell him about Justin. Her Justin. Especially not a stranger that was already freaking out enough. "My name is Erin. I need you to do me a favour, Justin. If you can."
He nodded his head rapidly. "Anything."
Erin wanted to call Voight. He needed to know what had happened. Maybe if he answered he wouldn't go through with it. "I think my phone has fallen down by my feet. Can you reach down and get it for me?"
Justin nodded his head again, accidentally spraying her slightly with water from his hair, and pulled the brunette's hand up to where his other one was, forcing her to keep pressure on the wound. He reached over the handbrake and began searching the floor for any trace of a cell phone - steadying himself on the steering wheel. Erin gazed down to him patiently, waiting for any sign of success.
"Got it," he said after a minute or so. "It was right under your seat."
"Thank you," she whispered. He placed his hand back carefully over hers and handed her the cell phone. The screen had a long crack along the bottom but there wasn't any major damage. She could deal with a little break. It still worked and that was all that mattered. Erin unlocked the phone carefully, making sure that she didn't drop it, and searching for Voight in her contact list. Her hands were trembling now more than they had before. She brought the phone to her ear, listening intently as it began to ring. "Come on Hank. Pick up?"
"Boyfriend?" he asked quietly but Erin made a face at him. "Sorry."
He wasn't picking up. Erin tried to change the subject, praying that she would hear the older man's voice soon. "Justin, can you check and see what's pinning my legs down. They're numb. I can't move them at all."
Justin frowned slightly, confused at what she was asking him to do. There was nothing touching her legs at all. At least, there hadn't been anything there when he was looking for her phone. "What do you mean?"
"There's something pinning me down," the brunette repeated. She was growing more and more frustrated by the second. Why did Hank have to be so stubborn. Why wouldn't he just listen to her. It had been a hard day for them all. Erin didn't want to think about what he was probably doing at that very minute.
He pretended to look for her sake. "There's nothing there, Erin."
Voicemail. She hung up quickly, dropping her phone onto her lap. Had she heard him right?
"There has to be something there," Erin shook her head. "I can't feel my legs."
Justin paused. He wasn't sure what he was supposed to say to her now. He had never been the comforting type. She was hurt and it was all his fault. "I think I can hear an ambulance. I'll go wave them down."
The sound of crunching metal seared through her head. The noise always made her cringe. She barely acknowledged the shower of rain that began to hit against her body and her face. It was freezing but all she could think about was the fact that she couldn't feel anything at all below her waist. She felt sick. The possibilities were racing through her mind but her gaze was immediately drawn to the fluorescent yellow strips on the uniforms beside her. Firefighters.
"Erin?" A flash of blonde entered her line of sight. "Shit."
Erin exhaled sharply as she began checking her vitals. "Brett?"
"Everything is going to be okay. We're going to take good care of you, Lindsay. I'll give you something for the pain." The paramedic slid a collar around her next before leaning back and reaching into her bag. She brought out a small flashlight, shining it in Erin's eyes momentarily and ordering her to follow it. The brunette frowned slightly at the brightness. "Good. Do you know what happened?"
"Car crash," she replied. "I think someone crashed into my car. Justin. He went to flag you down. I can't remember exactly what happened."
"Did you pass out?"
"I think so. One minute I was driving and the next I'm waking up and my ears are ringing."
"I'm going to give you some Entonox for the pain," Brett gave her a thin smile. "Gas and air."
"No." Erin pushed it away. Nitrous oxide was a no go. Not after everything that had happened with that case. "I can't use that."
"Okay," Sylvie nodded. "I can give you something else." Erin closed her eyes again as the she administered the pain medication. "I need you to stay awake for me, Lindsay. Can you do that for me?"
She forced her eyes open again and looked past Brett. There were firefighters hovering near her car but she couldn't see any of their faces. They were probably just as surprised as Sylvie had been to see her. Erin hoped that Gabby was amongst them. She hadn't even thought to call Jay. He would be freaking out that she hadn't been in contact. Erin wasn't sure how he would react to this. If Gabby was there then she would let Antonio know. Or Casey would. Or Severide. Erin was praying that someone would pass the news on. She sure as hell wouldn't be able to hold it together on the phone to Jay.
"Okay," the brunette replied. It was all she could get out. There was a growing lump in her throat and the tears were threatening to fall. She was closer to crying than she was to getting out of the car. She didn't want to cry. She had been doing enough of that tonight. She had to pull it together.
"That's a pretty nasty laceration you've got there," Brett said. She glanced down to the hoodie that Erin had discarded. She pulled out a small plastic bag out of her bag and opened it, pressing the large wad of gauze that was inside of it against the brunette's head. The blonde pressed Erin's own hand over it just as Justin had done a few minutes before. "Can you hold that in place for me? Does anything feel broken?"
"I think that my shoulder is dislocated but I can't tell." Erin could feel the drugs starting to kick in.
"I hope that wasn't your favourite jacket," Sylvie said, reaching into her bag again. "I'm not going to be able to get it off normally without moving you so I'll have to cut it."
"I never liked it anyway," Erin joked, forcing a small smile onto her face. Her face was dripping but she couldn't tell whether or not it was blood or rain anymore. She was glad that she wasn't able to see her reflection. She could only imagine what she must have looked like. The paramedic added another layer of gauze to the red clump that Erin was holding against her own head. The bleeding was slowing down but it hadn't quite stopped. She looked back to the windscreen as Sylvie worked. If her shoulder looked as bad as it felt then she definitely didn't want to be watching.
"It's definitely dislocated. You cops never do anything the easy way," she smirked. "They'll pop it back into place as soon as we get to the hospital."
"That doesn't sound like much fun."
"You've made it this far. A little dislocation is nothing."
"At least I'll have some cool scars to show from this. That'll be badass," Lindsay chuckled, trying to concentrate on something other than the pain.
"Trust me Lindsay, you don't need scars to make you badass," Brett replied. "Does it hurt anywhere else?"
"Just cuts and bruises" she answered quietly. "There's something wrong with my legs. I can't move my them." She couldn't believe that she had forgotten about it. As soon as they managed to get the door open, her thoughts had drifted completely. How could she have forgotten. "I thought they were trapped but I don't know what's happened."
Sylvie tapped her left leg from her ankle, past her shin, to her thigh, pausing after each hit to look at Erin. "Anything?" The brunette could tell that the paramedic was trying not to look worried for her sake. It was part of her job. Erin just wished that she would tell her what was really going on. She had to hear it. She didn't want to think that what was in her head could actually be true.
"No."
"Okay. It's going to be okay," Brett shook her head before turning around and calling. "Can I get a backboard?"
"I should be worried. It's really bad."
"Let's just focus on getting you out of here."
The next few minutes or so seemed to pass in a blur. It was as though Erin had blinked and suddenly she was lying flat on her back. She blinked again and she was being lifted away from her car and towards the open doors of a waiting ambulance. It was the first time since she had crashed that she was able to see the real damage to her car. It was a wreck. The brunette only saw it for a second or two but it was enough to make her wonder how she even got out of there alive. It was a shame. She couldn't help but at herself for thinking it, but she was going to miss that car.
"Brett," Erin called suddenly as she remembered her boyfriend. He would be freaking out. The blonde's head appeared over her own. "Can you let Jay know what happened. Please."
"He's already on his way to Med," the paramedic replied with a reassuring smile.
The blonde pulled an oxygen mask across her face. She couldn't feel her legs but she knew that they were strapped tightly against the stretcher. There was a strap across her chest too. Erin barely acknowledged the paramedic fussing around her as the ambulance started to move. Her gaze was fixed firmly on the ceiling. All she could think about was seeing Jay.
I've been playing about with the idea since the finale. I know it doesn't really match up with the Chicago Fire timeline and I know that my medical knowledge is pretty limited but I think tried my best. Please review and let me know what you think!