Texts John Never Sent - angst, hurt/comfort. Drabble. Text collection.
Author's note: I don't know whether this is a one-shot or I'll continue. Please leave your opinion about it, as encouragement is very welcome.
Following Sherlock's death, John had more than once - actually, quite a lot of times - caught himself writing texts to Sherlock. He never sent them, but he could not make himself delete them, so he put them all in a draft folder.
May 2. 13:44
Finally lunch break at the hospital. Been roaming the halls all day. Big traffic accident down on the highway. You must have heard about it somehow.
May 13. 19:49
I visited your grave today.
June 7. 19:59
Milk has gone off. There won't be enough for tea. Are you picki-
June 7. 20:01
Damn it. I must be losing my mind.
June 18. 23:43
Needed to distance myself from you, yet I visited your grave again today. I bet you know that already.
July 30. 15:56
In cab on my way to Harry's birthday. Give me strength.
July 30. 21:45
She's getting more and more drunk. It pains me to see her like this.
July 30. 22.13
Family's had their go with me now. Asked about you. Tried as hard as I could not choking up. Damn you.
July 30. 22:15
I really want to go home.
July 30. 22:47
I'm still there. I guess I'm drunk.
July 31. 00:01
I miss you, Sherlock.
July 31. 00:04
I wish you were here. I really do. No matter how much I'll regret thinking this later.
July 31. 10:12
… I didn't mean that.
July 31. 10:24
My head hurts.
July 31. 10:27
Will there never be anything in? Going to the shops. I'll return later. Do try to clean up. Mrs. H is complaining again.
July 31. 10:31
I really must be going crazy..
August 1. 00:01
Mycroft sent me in a car to the Diogenes Club today. He wanted to know if I'll continue living in 221b. I said yes.
August 1. 00:03
I think I'm regretting it. But how could I leave?
August 1. 00:05
I'm pathetic.
August 13. 04:45
Nightmare woke me up. I was back on the battlefield, seconds before I was shot. You jumped in front of the bullet and …
August 13. 04:47
Don't be dead, Sherlock.
August 13. 04:50
Please.
August 17. 19:12
Mrs. H. and I went to visit your grave. She complained about the lack of noise. I told her I would learn to play the violin. She smiled and cried.
August 19. 22:57
Just came in. Lestrade called me to Scotland Yard. You would have liked this case.
August 22. 15:29
You would know how to solve this case, Sherlock.
August 24. 19:13
God help me, I wish you could point out the clues I must have missed.
August 27. 17:34
Case solved. It was the diabetic aunt all along. You would have known.
August 27. 17:43
Gone for a pint with Lestrade and the forensics team.
August 27. 17:53
They toasted for you. Tried not to choke up. I think I failed. Lestrade quickly changed the subject.
August 27. 18:00
Damn it, Sherlock. I miss you.
August 27. 18:11
I left the pub. In cab on my way back to 221b.
August 27. 18:13
Is there anything in?
August 27. 18:15
I did it again. I wonder if I really am going crazy.
August 27. 19:11
Took a detour round to your grave. I broke down. I guess you already know that.
August 27. 20:44
Mrs. H is here. Strangely comforting.
August 27. 21:11
What a day.
August 27. 21:15
I enjoyed solving the case. I won't write it up, that would remind me too much of you.
August 27. 21:19
I hope this isn't the last crime I'll ever help solve.
August 31. 23:59
I'm afraid to forget you one day, Sherlock. I really am.