A/N: This story was written by Bra Leena Briefs AND Cauleena Flora. It is posted under both DragonBall Z and Harry Potter on this site. All flames will be used to barbecue the reviewer.
Disclaimer: We do not own DragonBall Z OR Harry Potter. We simply decided to combine these two ingenius story things and create a completely different story. But, as we said, we do not own them.
~*~Chapter 1: The Horrible Switch~*~
Harry Potter, Ron and Ginny Weasley, Hermione Granger, and Neville Longbottom sat forlornly in the dungeon on a rainy Wednesday night, the victims of another of Professor Severus Snape's detention-giving sprees.
Snape himself was seated at a desk in the front of the room: his feet propped comfortably on top, his face showing a contented sense of satisfaction. His favorite pastime was giving students detention. Of course, today, no one was able to come up with any creatively horrible tasks for the detentionees to complete, so the professor was stuck baby-sitting in the dungeon.
However, this did not lessen his enthusiasm. He stubbornly stuck to his word, and now sat in front of the bored students, watching them like a vulture and swooping down on them from time to time to happily punish any misbehavers who may (or may not) have been acting up.
"Well, what did we do to deserve this?" Harry whispered to Ron.
"I dunno. I guess we just showed up for class. That always seems to set old Buzzard-Face off," Ron replied dismally, shrugging his shoulders and placing his chin in his hand.
Harry let his thoughts wander. He thought of his favorite TV show, which he had discovered by creeping into Dudley's room while his fat cousin was at friends' houses. He had never once been caught. The show was DragonBall Z.
Then he remembered the manga Ron had given him for his birthday. (Ron had watched the show on one of the many televisions Mr. Weasley had acquired over the years.) Harry also remembered that, before detention, he had stuck the manga in his robes so he would have something to read.
Grinning, he pulled out his wand and pointed it at Snape from under the desk. Reciting the incantation for the Slumberus Temporarus, the Sleeping Charm, a charm he recently learned from one of Hermione's books, he moved his wand back and forth in a swinging motion, much like that of a pendulum.
Slowly, Snape's eyelids began to droop. When the comforting sound of his snores reached Harry's ears, the student jumped up and faced the others. He pulled out the manga.
"Hey, Ron, look! I brought along that DBZ manga you gave me so we wouldn't be bored to death!" he exclaimed.
Ron jumped, startled by the unexpected outburst. "Harry, are you mad? Snape. . ." He trailed off, seeing the sleeping professor slouched in his seat, then laughed out loud. "Looks like old Buzzard-Face decided to kip on the job, eh Harry?"
Harry, too, laughed at the snoring supervisor. "Guess so," he replied, secretly congratulating himself.
Hermione was looking from Snape to Harry with a suspicious look on her face. "Harry, did you. . . Oh, never mind. We don't have to be in detention anymore. I guess I could overlook the fact that you PLACED A SPELL ON A TEACHER just this once."
Neville, meanwhile, had a very confused look on his face. He looked at Harry and Ron, who were busy giving each other high-fives on Harry's success. "Um, what's a DBZ manga?" he asked his laughing classmates.
Harry and Ron stop laughing abruptly. They stared at him, openmouthed. Ron started to say something, but was cut off by Hermione.
"What's a DBZ manga? WHAT'S A DBZ MANGA?! DO YOU LIVE IN THIS WORLD OR ARE YOU FROM SOME REMOTE PLANET GAZILLIONS OF MILES AWAY? APPARENTLY YOU ARE BECAUSE YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT A DRAGONBALL Z MANGA IS?!" she shouted, her eyes wide with shock. Neville jumped back and tripped over a chair. He lay sprawled on the floor, staring at Hermione in terror. Harry's and Ron's gazes slowly turned to their bushy-haired friend. Harry's eyes momentarily flicked to Snape, making sure the pedagogue was still taking a siesta. Then he turned back to Hermione.
"Hermione?!" Ron half-whispered in awe.
"What?" she asked peevishly.
"You know about DragonBall Z?" Harry asked incredulously.
"Of course she knows about it!" Ginny Weasley said suddenly, startling them all again. "I saw it once when Ron, Fred, and George were watching it. Then I showed it to Hermione on one of Dad's other TV's. We both love it!"
Hermione nodded. "Yeah, now I watch it at home. It's my favorite show."
Ron and Harry exchanged dubious looks, shrugged, and sat down to look at the manga. "Oh yeah, this one's from the episodes with that pink thing that no one can ever beat, huh?" Ron asked. Harry nodded.
Neville came over to join them, rubbing his injured rear end. He looked at one of the pictures. "Who's that?" he asked, pointing to one of the characters.
"It says all his name right here, Neville!" Harry said exasperatedly, indicating the small speech bubbles.
"Buu," Neville read. He shuddered. "I don't like him. He scares me." He walked over to where he had been sitting before, still looking rather shaken.
"You get scared too easily. He may be impossible to defeat, but he's cool. He'd make a great Saiyan," Ron said. "Hey, Harry, who's your favorite character?"
"Why, Vegeta, of course! Harry answered, as if there was no other possible answer. "He's the greatest!"
"Why him? Goku could kick that guy's butt from here to Pluto!" Ron exclaimed.
"Could not!" Harry protested.
"Could too!"
"Could not!"
"Could too!"
"Could not!"
"Could too!"
"Stop it, both of you!" Ginny yelled, placing herself between the two arguing teenagers. "Boys!" she sighed, rolling her eyes.
"Well, who's your favorite character, Miss I'm-Better-Because-I'm-A-Girl?" Ron asked, crossing his arms.
"I like Bulma," she said importantly.
"Why?" asked Harry and Ron simultaneously. Harry had an idea of what her reason would be: a reason that made him blush.
"Because," she answered flippantly, "she's rich, funny, smart, and beautiful! What more could a girl want in herself?"
Harry heaved a sigh of relief. "Whatever you say, Ginny."
"I think Puar is adorable!" Hermione squealed, hugging herself. The boys snorted.
Hermione glared at them, then jumped as she heard a cold chuckle behind her. She glanced back, and, to her horror, saw Professor Snape's icy, black eyes open and on her.
"Well," he said, folding his hands. "Well, well, well." He took a look at the hourglass on his desk, which had quite nearly run out of sand, marking the end of detention. With a nasty smile and a wave of his wand, however, the sand reversed its flow.
Neville whimpered, causing Snape's evilly-smiling face to assume the shape of a terrifying scowl. At this, the pudgy boy buried his face in his arms and went silent.
"Mr. Potter, Mr. Weasley, Miss Granger," he addressed them in his mockingly formal manner, "detention is NOT a social hour. I would have thought that after spending so much time in it, you'd have learned that. Clearly, I was mistaken." His eyes fell on the graphic novel in Harry's hands, and his lip curled.
He got up and strolled over to the student. Grabbing the book, he spoke to the five students present. "Now, unless you all want a week more of detentions, you will end this pointless discussion and cease reading about--" He flipped to a random page in the book. "--Yamcha. Now sit down and shut up."
Harry was too busy feeling sorry for himself for losing his manga to laugh at Snape's clear lack of DragonBall Z knowledge.
Thus, the five students returned to their disconsolate, restless state of sitting under the watchful, no, all-seeing eye of Professor Snape.
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Bulma Briefs and Puar sat out on lawn chairs in a field at Capsule Corporation, reading Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire for the umpteenth time.
Vegeta, Goku, and Yamcha stood several yards away from them, trying to come up with ways of ridding the rest of the Briefs family of their obsession with Harry Potter.
"Damn!" Vegeta was saying. "You'd think my wife was in love with this--this Harry Potter person! I read the books simply to shut her up about 'Oh, Vegeta, you have to read this!' I saw nothing exceptionally great about them."
Goku spoke up. "Well, maybe we could--"
"Shut up, Kakarot. No one cares," Vegeta interrupted, almost as a reflex. A vein slowly appeared near Goku's temple as he pictured Vegeta under the Cruciatus Curse. (Yes, even he had given in to the universal craze.)
Yamcha was fighting the urge not to laugh when he said, "I think we should introduce them to Superman."
Vegeta gaped at him. "Are you out of your damn mind? Don't you think my kids have enough to fight about?"
Yamcha stared at him blankly. "Huh?"
"Well, if my kids read Superman, they'd get into a huge debate over whether or not I could beat him! Trunks would say I couldn't, but Bra would say I could." A smile played at the Saiyan Prince's lips. "That's my little princess, always on my side."
"Yeah, especially when she wants something," Yamcha muttered to Goku.
"What was that?" Vegeta said menacingly, puffing himself up to look more intimidating.
"Nothing, nothing, not a thing," Yamcha replied innocently, struggling even more to stop himself from laughing out loud.
"That's what I thought." Then he stopped. "Hey," he said suddenly. "Where's that energy coming from?"
"What?" said Yamcha. He sensed it as well and looked up towards the sky. A small pink dot was heading toward them, getting bigger and bigger every second.
"No! It can't be!" Goku exclaimed.
"It is!" cried Yamcha. "Its, it's, it's--"
"BUU!!!" said the great pink monster, Majin Buu.
"Holy shit!" said Vegeta. "Didn't we already kill this bastard?"
"I, I thought we did!" Goku replied.
"Oh, great," Yamcha sighed. "So I guess we're gonna have to fight him now?"
"Congratulations!" said the Saiyan Prince sarcastically. "Kakarot, tell him what he's won!"
"Huh?" asked Goku, not getting it. Yamcha, on the other hand, did get it. Angrily, he glared at Vegeta, who glared back with equal ire.
"He say 'bastard.' What mean 'bastard?'" Buu asked in his annoying little voice.
"It means you're a disgraceful piece of shit who doesn't deserve to live!" said Vegeta, still scowling at Yamcha.
"Oh!" replied the monster. "Me no like you! Me eat you up now!"
Yamcha and Vegeta continued with their little staring contest for nearly five minutes, both waiting for Bulma to tell them to cut it out. When she did not, they each raised an eyebrow and glanced over at her. They stared in amazement when they realized that she was so absorbed in the book that she had not even looked up when Buu arrived.
"We really have got to get her off those things," Yamcha commented.
"What'd I tell you?" Vegeta replied.
"Hey, guys!" Goku called. "Aren't we going to fight him?"
"Buu!" said Buu.
"Right," said Yamcha, looking away from Bulma. "Let's do this." With that, the three fighters attacked.
"Hey, Puar," Bulma was saying, oblivious to the battle raging on in front of her. "How do you think you pronounce this spell?" She pointed to the Summoning Spell, "Accio."
Puar scampered over to Bulma's lap, leaving her own copy of the Harry Potter book on the other lawn chair. Looking at the strange work, she cocked her head and said, "I dunno. Ack-ee-see-oh, maybe?"
Suddenly, everyone froze, unable to move. The only things they could move were their mouths. "Uh, Puar?" Bulma said uncertainly. "I think you might have said it wrong."
"Ya think?" came the aggravated reply.
Vegeta was fuming. Eyes flashing, he spoke to his wife, enunciating each word. "What. The. Hell. Did. You. Do."
"I didn't do anything!" she protested. "It was Puar!"
"Oh, sure, blame it all on me," Puar muttered.
"Yeah, don't automatically jump to conclusions, Vegeta!" Yamcha agreed, naturally jumping to Bulma's defense.
"Oh, go shove it up your ass, Yamcha," Vegeta grumbled. "On second thought, don't. You might like it.
"Hey, both of you, shut up!" Goku yelled. "We gotta figure out a way to reverse this!"
"Did me do this?" Buu asked in his puny voice.
"Shut it, you annoying little bastard!" Vegeta snarled.
"Oh, no! You say mean word again! Me eat you up when we unfroze!"