Career day at Sunnydale Elementary. All the parents are there, sitting in
back. Some look nervous. Some looked fine.
"My daddy's a firefighter. he saves lotsa people every week! I love him!"the little boy beamed.
"That's great John," the teacher said, praising the little boy. "Ok, Scott, stand up and tell us what your parents do."
"My daddy was a really bad poet when he was alive-" The boy began.
"Um, your daddy's dead?"
"Well, sorta. See, if you'll let me finish..." The boy started to say when he heard his mother from the back of the room.
"Scottie! be nice!"
"Yes Ma'am. Anyways, daddy always said dying was the greatest thing that happened to him," By now the teacher was looking completely stunned, "and by the time he was 35 he and his best friend, angelus, had become the greatest two guys at what they did."
"And what is that?"
"Well, eating people. Daddy was the scourge of Europe and he tortured people with railroad spikes. Uncle Angel was more into raping and maiming his dinner. Anyway, uncle Angel got his soul back around the turn of the century. Bloody poof. Anyways, daddy didn't know about this and ran around the world eating people with his ho, Druscilla.," the teachers mouth was agape, "One day a few years back he stumbled into Sunnydale and met my mom. He ended up getting a chip stuck in his brain by a secret government organization and now he cant hurt people. He loves my mom and aunt Dawn said the best thing he would ever be is my protector."
The teacher looked back at the two parents. One looked like she could die and the other gleamed with pride all over his face. "good going," he whispered with a thumbs up to his son.
"Um, your son is very creative," turning back to Scott she said, "Should I even bother to ask what your mom does?"
"Oh, she turns men like daddy to dust!"
"My daddy's a firefighter. he saves lotsa people every week! I love him!"the little boy beamed.
"That's great John," the teacher said, praising the little boy. "Ok, Scott, stand up and tell us what your parents do."
"My daddy was a really bad poet when he was alive-" The boy began.
"Um, your daddy's dead?"
"Well, sorta. See, if you'll let me finish..." The boy started to say when he heard his mother from the back of the room.
"Scottie! be nice!"
"Yes Ma'am. Anyways, daddy always said dying was the greatest thing that happened to him," By now the teacher was looking completely stunned, "and by the time he was 35 he and his best friend, angelus, had become the greatest two guys at what they did."
"And what is that?"
"Well, eating people. Daddy was the scourge of Europe and he tortured people with railroad spikes. Uncle Angel was more into raping and maiming his dinner. Anyway, uncle Angel got his soul back around the turn of the century. Bloody poof. Anyways, daddy didn't know about this and ran around the world eating people with his ho, Druscilla.," the teachers mouth was agape, "One day a few years back he stumbled into Sunnydale and met my mom. He ended up getting a chip stuck in his brain by a secret government organization and now he cant hurt people. He loves my mom and aunt Dawn said the best thing he would ever be is my protector."
The teacher looked back at the two parents. One looked like she could die and the other gleamed with pride all over his face. "good going," he whispered with a thumbs up to his son.
"Um, your son is very creative," turning back to Scott she said, "Should I even bother to ask what your mom does?"
"Oh, she turns men like daddy to dust!"