Lips press, tongues push - waves crashing, cold, shuddering and shivering. Startled sounds, softer now, sinking in. Fingers frantic, feverish, freeing silk shackles; Lavellan sighs, hands in my hair, twisting and turning as it sheds - a second skin. Dress tangles and tears, but everything feels narrow, now - urgent, urging forward, fumbling but not faltering. She throws my hat, and it floats through the air before it falls.

I want to touch, to take, but it's distant, daunting. Shaking, scared, uncertain - what do I do? It's too much, too little, but... she is soft, surrendered, smiling, hand hugging the nape of my neck. Blood burns and her fingers follow, palm pressing and probing, touched but untouched. Spine shakes, skull shatters - a buzzing through the body to the brain. She frees me, smiling sweetly, stroking through shallow breaths.

It's hard to breathe, to bear, and the brain moves the muscles, not me. Something sings inside, an instinct, a cadence calling out to find the soft, hidden place with pink stained skin. A map, easy to follow, to feel - fingertips on flesh, down her neck, below ribs and between hips. Hands guide hands - fingers flex and she cries out, curses, "Fuck, fuck, fuck."

She moves, manic, turning, twisting, tangled and trapped by sweat soaked sheets. Pushing, pulling, pressing hard - kneading her knot. Walls closing in, collapsing. Taut. Tightening. Fingers warm, wet, then cold, clammy, and I'm on my back. She pulls away, positions, and -

Fire, flames, something brighter, burning - I'm someone else, shallow, suspended, then sinking. Anchored, ocean - I, I can't breathe, I -

Movement, a flood of heat, then cold- where is it? Where is it? It hurts to be away! Down, and up, and, and -

Teasing, twisting, tormented - emptied and aching. I want it to end, I want -

She laughs. I want to kill her.

Hips hovering above, grazing but gone, out of reach - "Did you need something, Cole?"

"It hurts," I say.

She smiles. "Then tell me what you want."

"Let me - let me - "

"Let you what?"

I want to scream, squirm - "Let - let me - "

"Let you what?"

"Let me in."

"My Keeper always told me to be wary of demons asking me to let them in," Lavellan laughs, "but I think I'll make an exception for you." She moves, and -

Relief. Burning low, languid, embers in the belly - better than before. Slow, steady strokes, shaking, shuddering -

Fluttering feelings, and fingers press where she presses against me. She - she moans, I feel - I -

Faster, now - feverish. Waves crash closer - a surrender to the swell, a -

Taut, tightens, trembling tremors - she shakes, squeezes, sighs -

I - ah -

It's - it -

It -

It's... done.

Relief and release. Warmth, tingling - no more pressure, no more pain. Dazed, dazzled, Lavellan leans, lips pressing against lips. It's better, now - still surface, rising water relieved and receded, a snapped string. She brings me more to here, more human than I've ever felt. It doesn't scare me, anymore.

I might be sad tomorrow, but I'm happy, now. She lies in my arms, a part I never knew. I love her; she's doesn't have to love me.

It is enough.