"Arigatou"…
Thank you
"Mata konda na"…
Ill see you soon
"Are you even married to him?"
"Whats strange is your relationship with him"
Words unknown to most, hurt more than actions are capable of. They hurt more than when your body is pierced with a kunai or even a certain someones chidori tears through you, because those wounds can be healed. The wounds of words however, leave invisible scars that no medic-nin could heal. And that's the stress Sakura is under.
Hanging on the hope of "I'll see you soon" and all the "thank you"s, Sakura feels just how empty those words are, its not even a sudden realization really, its a wall of pretense she has build for herself in the past 12 years that's been slowly crumbling, and now has finally fallen to the ground after listening to her daughters inquiries. "Its not fair" Sarada states again and again, and Sakura knows shes correct, it truly isn't fair, shes knows it when she sees the envy in her daughters eyes, and she knows it when she sees the tears. Perhaps 12 years is a long time to be in love with a ghost of a presence and even a longer time spent defending said presence.
All these thoughts don't let Sakura sleep as she tries to get up from the futon restless covered in sweat. "Dont" says Shizune helping Sakura lie back down "You need to rest". "Iie, Daijobu" 'Im fine, I always am'.."Wheres Sarada?" Sakura questions. "She went to get something from the house or whats left of it. Sakura you really shouldnt stress yourself this much. Sarada shouldnt have to witness her only parent..present parent faint so often. Its not fair to her Sakura". Sakura winces upon hearing that as if the last sentence physically burns her. "I know Shizune…She's questing alot more you know? She has questions I dont even have the answers to, questions I myself have been dying to know the answers to…She doesn't even think I'm married to him…It angered me hearing her say that..but…shes not wrong to wonder, hell, I even question the status of our marriage…" Sakura's vision is begins to blur, not due the fatigue, but rather the tears shes trying to suppress "I-We don't even have a picture together, I had cut myself into a picture with him" Sakura chokes on a sob despite desperately trying not to cry "J-just like I've had push myself into his life…I-I know it was my own choice but it's tiring to have to constantly defend my decisions as if it wasn't the wrong choice as if everything is fine…a-as if Im happy being left behind for 12 years" "Sakura…" Shizune closes her eyes tight as if she can literally feel Sakura's pain.
Before Shizune can console Sakura, She hears the sound of the front door opening and closing and then the faint knock on the door, knowing it can be no one else, she hears Sakura yell "Come in Sarada-chan". The worry on Sarada's face is evident, but its not just that, shes pale as if shes seen a ghost. "Sarada-chan are you ok?" asks Sakura, her voice laced with the tension of seeing her daughters terrified condition. "I'm fine…" Sarada slowly steps towards Sakura and before anyone can say anything else, Sarada hugs her mother close as if, if she let go, Sakura might slip away. "I'm just glad you're okay Mama" Sarada tightens her hold on her mother. A bit surprised but happy nonetheless Sakura hugs back Sarada, holding her just as close "Im sorry I made you worry Sarada-chan". Sarada doesnt reply instead just nuzzles her face in the rosettes hair, however all fail to notice what Sarada seems to be clutching in her fist.
AN: hah that was kinda intense to write, I hope you guys liked it, I really wanna continue writing it and I will but I would love to hear some feedback as this is my first fanfic ?. I will be making next chapters longer, at least 1k words per chapter but I just wanted to sorta dip my feet into the water with this one.