Author's note: Just something that came to me in the middle of the night. I'm not the best writer (and my English isn't what I want it to be), so constructive criticism is always welcome =)
Summary: It didn't matter if they were friends, lovers or enemies, it was always the same. John froze, while Bobby melted.
And that's exactly how they wanted it to be.
Freezing Fire and Melting Ice
Freeze me.
He thinks those words as he arches his back into Bobby's body, pressing against him. Bobby's hands are like ice on the bare skin underneath John's shirt, so cold it almost hurts. They are fifteen years old and all they do is kiss and grind against each other but it feels like much more.
John hates cold. He had been cold, living alone on the streets and he had been cold when he arrived at the mansion and lay awake in an empty, unfamiliar room.
But Bobby's cold is different. It's like he's freezing every painful memory, every unwanted emotion. John wants it - he needs it. Needs to be frozen, to be simply turned in to ice and not feel anything except for Bobby's breath against his mouth.
Melt me.
Bobby thinks it every time John kisses him, almost as if it's a silent dare. It's what he waits for to happen, knowing it has to at some point. John is burning him, but ice can not burn, it just melts and Bobby can feel it happening.
He's never felt pain like John has. His family doesn't know he's not normal, so he still has them. He is well raised and polite, so he has friends and does not know loneliness like John does.
Maybe that's why it feels like John overwhelms him with each kiss, each touch. He feels the other boy's misery, like the flames he produces and he can feel it consuming him.
Can feel John consuming him.
"Freeze me."
Sometimes he wants to say it out loud. Beg Bobby to make him numb. Bobby's slipping away from him, seeking comfort in the safety of normality. It's ironic really. A gay mutant and the girlfriend he can not touch. Not really all that normal.
John wants to scream at him, punch him, strangle him, keep him close. All he can do is claw at Bobby's back as they have sex, pull him so close that it almost hurts en pray that he will turn into ice. If he is frozen, nothing can change.
"Melt me."
Sometimes he imagines himself saying it to John. "Come on, make me forget myself. Make me disappear."
He hates John. Hates him because he's rude and selfish and because he's always on Bobby's mind. He wants him so bad that he thinks he's going crazy.
He's losing himself and it scares him. It scares him because he's not sure if John will stay with him forever.
John never says "I love you," and Rogue does. Rogue is save and easy. Rogue isn't John and when John leaves Bobby feels his blood go cold.
Bobby wishes he had just let John melt him.
Not having him anymore is way worse.
Love me. Come on you son of a bitch, love me!
John is still angry. So angry it burns in his veins. So he doesn't feel guilty when his flames clash against Bobby's ice. Bobby was supposed to be there forever.
John had forgotten that he didn't even believe in that word.
Love me. Please.
John doesn't look like the John Bobby knows. He tries to forget the pain he felt when the other left and he tries to forget that he's the reason John left in the first place.
As he collides with John he feels every emotion he ever felt for the other and it almost chokes him.
"You should have never left."
"Love me."
John doesn't plan on saying it, it just happens. He isn't even sure if Bobby's real, or just a side effect of the morphine.
Their eyes meet and Bobby carefully reaches across the hospital bed to take Johns hand. His breath is cold against Johns ear as he whispers: "Only if you love me back."