Instrumentality was rejected by the one Shinji Ikari. The boy who defied all odds, yet never seemed to defy anything in his path. The earth was filled with crosses, and in space was every Evangelion built until the fated day. Red was everywhere, no matter where one looked.
Truly a planetary devastation.
No atmosphere. Not even one living thing survived; no life was left on the planet.
The boy who became god was elsewhere.
Pitch-black. That is all Shinji Ikari could see outside.
Silence. That was all Shinji Ikari could hear outside.
Nothingness. Shinji Ikari could not feel anything.
Shinji floats through the void endlessly, engaged in a mental battle against himself.
Inside the mind of a broken god; not even the screams of the EVAs can compare to the war of whispers within the last of the Ikari line.
Remake the world without those that hate you.
Remake the world with those that love you.
Remake the world without anyone.
Remake the world with everyone alive.
Remake the world, everyone more friendly to each other.
Remake the world, everyone more hostile to each other.
Remake the world, everyone must love you.
Remake the world, everyone must hate you.
Let her live and suffer.
Let her live and love you.
Let her die.
Let her live.
Leave him to live and suffer.
Leave him to live and love you.
Leave him to die.
Leave him alone.
…
…
…
...
Revive the world and turn those that hate you into ashes.
Revive the world and return those that have turned into ashes.
Revive the world and unturn those blinded by love or hate.
Revive the world and let individuals decide.
Live once again and become a god amongst men.
Live another life and make the knowing blind to your existence.
Live anew and elevate others to the realm of happiness
Live once more and suffer to repent the sins of humanity.
I will be born with no knowledge.
I will be born without anyone's knowledge.
I will be born as everyone's scapegoat.
I'm scared.
No one will never rely on me.
Everyone can rely on me.
No one can be relied on.
I failed everyone. How can they expect me to rely on them?
…
…
…
…
We will have no power against everyone.
We will have no power for everyone.
We will have power against everyone.
I don't want power against anyone.
…
…
…
…
Life will begin as if nothing has happened.
Life will begin as if Instrumentality never happened.
Life will begin as if everyone knew what happened.
Life begins only if I know everyone that has suffered because of me.
Repent.
Repent.
Repent.
Forgive me.
Floating in the void, a naked Shinji Ikari resides infinitely within his slumber.
A small yellow and white light appears in front of him.
"Do you desire power?"
Hearing a heavenly voice, Shinji slowly wakes up.
"...huh?" He sleepily mumbles, unaware of his surroundings and current state of dress.
"Do you need power?" The heavenly voice responds, light increasing and decreasing intensity as it speaks.
"I… I don't need power. Not after all that's happened." Shinji says, now fully awake. He stares momentarily at the light, before gazing off into the void.
Realizing that he is floating in the middle of nowhere, he begins to panic… except he can't. Shinji finds himself unable to panic. Nor can he conjure feelings of anxiety, dislike, or embarrassment. He cannot feel the feelings he used to often rely on so much. However, he still retains his nervousness.
"Do you want power to save others who are in need? The heavenly voice rumbles once more, no emotion betraying its intention. The light slowly expands, slow enough that Shinji would not notice.
"..." Shinji was at a loss. What kind of power can be granted to him that can save his friends? How can he even hope to save those already lost?
"They are not lost. You already have restored them before they succumbed to their fate."
"W-what? How can you-"
"-read your mind? That is irrelevant. I can sense that you are desperate to gain powers to save your kin."
Shinji is truly confused. How did this light know things he didn't? Let alone even know what he has gone through?
"You do not have enough confidence in yourself. In fact, you despise your every being. Not from past experiences, no. But from being unable to save those close to you."
Shinji knew what it was talking about. How he failed to save Touji from Unit-03. How he failed to save Misato because he was too self-indulged in being pathetic. How he failed Rei because he couldn't save himself. How he failed Asuka…
"I will grant you the power you need to fight back and save them." The light has become twice the size of Shinji, covering up most of his vision. He raises his right arm to lessen the bright light in front of him.
"W-wait! What kind of powers are you giving me?!" Shinji cries out, very unsure of the entire situation. In fact, he didn't even know what to make of it. Here he was, floating in the middle of an endless void naked, and in comes this talking light who wants to give him a power?
"You will find out soon. Now go. The world needs you again, Shinji Ikari." The mix of male and female voices boom out, the light finally enveloping him before darkness hugged him once again.
A pair of purple eyes flashed within the yellow and white light. After, into a pair of red, then quickly settling into a deep blue before shortly fading into the light. The light itself slowly dissipates into the black void.
[END CH0]
Hello.
Welcome to Rinse & Repeat.
I won't try to bore you for long. I'm just trying to redeem myself for not continuing the To-Love Ru fic I had. That means that I'm working on a lot of stuff, fanfiction included. With that said, I cannot make any promises on when I can get chapters finished by. Some days I'll be rolling on a steam train. Other times, my brain is bricked or my limbs don't feel like doing anything.
Thank you for reading.