Doc Martin is owned by Buffalo Pictures. I own nothing related to it but enjoy it immensely.
Sitting in an airport waiting for clearance to take off ... might as well do something constructive ...
A Marriage of Inconvenience
Louisa was heartbroken following the non-wedding. As she walked down the hill, numbed … to Martin, to everyone and everything around her, she couldn't believe that a day which had started so promisingly had gone so sideways. Every little doubt she had was magnified … by her friends and their comments, as well as by her own lack of confidence in her and Martin's ability to commit to make each other happy. Looking into the future, and as well as looking back and knowing how hard it had been for them to get where they were today, she was concerned about their ability to change their own behavior, even to each other and knowing how much they cared for each other.
Because when you came down to it, both she and Martin would need to adjust their behavior and way of thinking if they were ever going to live in the same house without driving each other around the bend. Neither hadn't gotten to where they were professionally by compromising all the time. In fact, they were each strong-willed and possessed of a certainty they were right about so many things. And when it came down to it, she began to doubt whether she could change, and even more so, whether he could.
That doubt is what drove her to write the letter, and show up at Martin's house when they both should have been at the church. When she saw him there, instead of talking it through with him, she capitulated to him expressing the same doubts. Forces beyond both of them had framed all of their actions that day and cast the most dismal looking future for them in each of their minds. In the crucial moment when they should have supported each other into a better, if dauntingly challenging future together, they allowed their doubts to get the best of them.
Never one to sit inactively, she took Holly up on her offer, and moved to London almost immediately. Taking a job teaching in Holly's school was necessary in the short term, to provide something to do, and take her mind off of Martin. But at night, by herself, she slowed down and lived quietly and very alone. She continued to walk through her life, a shadow of her former self.
It was no different for Martin. Externally, he may not have appeared much different, but his life which in the few weeks he and Louisa were engaged and happier, suddenly paled back into a more sedate existence. To be sure, the villagers whom he classified as malingerers or time wasters or generally, a pack of lemmings in their personal habits and lack of hygiene, felt sorry for Martin even if they suspected he sort of had it coming, because they all assumed Louisa had come to her senses and had left him.
But truthfully, they had let themselves be persuaded by external forces and other people, as well as some inner personal demons, and each was broken in a way not easily explainable to others.
Their connection, as it would turn, was deeper than their resolve to walk away from each other.
The thought that her general feeling of lingering illness might be something else slowly dawned on Louisa. Confronting the reality that she might be pregnant was a weird confirmation that her connection to Martin was basic. Even though they had made love only a few times, and had taken precautions, on some level, they had connected in an irreversible way, and now would be connected forever. Because even Louisa could see that her biological clock was ticking, and at 37 she might not have many more chances to become pregnant by someone whom she had loved, still did, if truth be told, and why not have their baby? Assuming a healthy baby, he or she would have a good chance of being smart and having a lively intellect … and with Louisa as the main parent, as even Martin had noticed, she'd make a good mother. Her absolute comfort in being around children, and knowing how to manage them, and well, let's face it, her ability to deal with people in general, would no doubt be imparted in some fashion to any child she would have even with Martin' s contribution of half the child's DNA.
So many of Martin's social shortcomings could be directly attributed to his abysmal upbringing, rather than his lack of interest or even his personal integrity. The fact that he'd successfully survived into adulthood and, more so, as a skilled surgeon and doctor, was a testament to him. Somehow, his survival skills, honed as a young child, depended on his finely developed ability to take notice of the world around him and connect the dots, and take action. As long as the dots were things and facts, like his clocks or medical diagnoses, he could function in general society because these were valuable skills. But his lack of being around adults who had normal interpersonal relationships, and the ridicule to which he was subjected in grammar school and later, made him build some pretty thick personal walls. In order to control his universe, he developed a thick skin of truthtelling and strong resolve never to lose control. It's why he didn't drink or develop close friendships. Because if you get close to someone, they can hurt you. He learned that lesson repeatedly … from his parents, from Edith and lately, from Louisa. The only consistently reliable person in his life was Joan, and even she had her odd moments.
But in matters that counted, he knew she loved him no matter what. And it appeared that she was the only one.
He had thought Louisa felt that way about him. He absolutely felt that way about her, not that he fell all over himself saying it aloud. But he did. That time they had drunk the wine, and he had confessed that all he thought about every day was catching a glimpse of her … well, that was the truth. He was smitten and had been from the first time he saw her on the plane to his interview as Portwenn's GP. He had never been struck by the bolt of love lightning before. His interest in Edith all those years earlier was more a compatibility of intellect and frankly, her interest in him. She had proven to be a good technician, and he had fallen for her, but his feelings had not been returned in the same way.
It only added to his emotional brick wall of protection.
He had not come to Portwenn expecting to meet a love interest. At best, he was licking his wounds and making the best of a bad professional situation, his newly discovered blood phobia, which would prevent him from continuing to practice, never mind excel, as a surgeon. Moving to a less pressured environment, reconnecting with his beloved Aunty Joan, would allow him to slow down a bit, and perhaps live a slightly healthier lifestyle while he regained his professional footing, or at least continued to use his medical knowledge in a productive way, since he was too young to retire and had few other interests.
So when he met, and insulted, the attractive young woman on the plane, only to find out she was on the board recommending him to become Portwenn's GP, fate was about to play a rather entertaining game with him as a primary player, and Louisa Glasson as his opponent … or maybe it was the other way around.
The chemistry between them was palpable from the beginning. She was the beloved primary school teacher, destined to become the head of Portwenn Primary School. And he was the local GP, grumpy, ill tempered, but utterly committed to keeping those in his care as healthy as they would let him. But his manner … gruff and prickly, unassailable, arrogant in his certainty of medical knowledge … he was something of a challenge the likes of which Portwenn had not seen before.
Pregnancy
When Louisa returned to Portwenn, somewhat hoping to find Martin at least open to the idea of sharing parenting duties with her, she was shocked (and, ultimately, heartbroken once again) to see he had already moved on with Edith, sitting so comfortably in his kitchen sharing God knows what confidences, when she stopped by. It absolutely blew her mind that in so short a time, Martin had replaced her with the very cold, calculating Edith. It never in a million years occurred to Louisa that Martin was only her acquaintance, and that he still harbored feelings for her, especially after their disastrous first meeting upon her return.
Over the years, Louisa herself had erected a personal, somewhat inviolable wall of protection which on the outside, performed remarkably like Martin's exterior … it led her to jump to act first, think later, before anyone could reach inside her and break her heart all over again. Although that damage had been done.
It was hard to celebrate the life growing within her, knowing that Martin wasn't interested in parenting their child. She also had a multitude of issues to deal with, including finding another place to live, ensuring it was clean and child worthy, and even just getting enough food and rest every day. Emotionally, she was much more brittle than she'd ever been, which was saying something, given her navigation of local intrigue when her father had absconded with the village's funds for the lifeboats. She had worked so hard to maintain a decent reputation in the community, but now she was the subject of much speculation (mostly behind her back), because her lack of prudent birth control was evident for all to see, despite the fact that it had been a spectacular fail for both her and Martin, not intentional or even really, sloppy.
She was surprised by Martin's assumption that he would have become her GP again, upon her return, despite the broken state of their relationship. If she had reflected on it for even a few minutes in a less hormonal and agitated state, she might have seen how hurt he was by her lack of even considering him in this context.
Later, as he tried to offer support, whether to drive her to her appointments, or financially, for their child's upkeep, she had a very hard time accepting his offers as anything other than doing the minimum necessary as required by law. She maintained her position that she could take care of everything and it … no, they … were not his concern.
Martin, in turn, couldn't understand how Louisa could be so stubborn and so unaware of how hard her future would become. With the addition of their child to her life, she was facing a future of more hard work, less of a social life, since the child would require a lot of attention, never mind the significant expense attached to raising a child. He was sick at the thought of her shouldering the burden for their mistake all alone. In fact, he never intended to abandon her or their child, but as she grew increasingly adamant and as he could never recover her good graces, he felt he had no choice. He couldn't bear to watch her go through all this alone. So he turned to the one thing that had always sustained him, and decided to take active measures to return to his surgical practice and his former standing among that community back in London. As he worked through the desensitizing procedures on a daily basis, he felt a small measure of control being returned to him. His whole experience in Portwenn would soon be behind him. At least his future interactions with his child, if Louisa allowed them, would show him to be a well respected medical professional of some standing. It was the best he would likely be able to offer his unborn child.
As their child's due date grew closer, they each became stressed for different reasons. Martin planned his departure from Portwenn. Louisa was facing the inevitable.
Fast forward.
Baby Philip has arrived on the scene. The crucible of Martin and Louisa being rather hastily thrown together with each other and the major complication of a newborn as well, promised the village all the entertainment they could hope for with these two characters. The two main characters, however, had a lot of adjusting to do.
The distraction of baby Philip was, at first, a good way for Louisa and Martin to focus on something other than each other. As a newborn, he was fairly good at sleeping, a bit of crying, eating and pooping. She couldn't believe how much she loved Philip from the minute she first saw him. She loved holding him, kissing him, smelling his new baby smell. Learning to breastfeed him was scary at first, but once they got the hang of it, a perfectly natural way of connecting. The first time Martin saw them when Philip was feeding, he couldn't take his eyes off them – Louisa absolutely captivated by their son, and radiant. Even Martin could marvel in the beauty of the two most important people in his life, although he was embarrassed to be caught looking.
To him Louisa had grown more beautiful with pregnancy and as a new mother. Although she had a few pounds to lose, her larger breasts and curvier figure made her irresistible to Martin. He couldn't take his eyes off them. How had this happened? He didn't really believe in God, but larger forces than him were clearly at work here.
When Martin originally proposed, "I can't bear to be without you. Please will you marry me, Louisa," she took his breath away. He couldn't believe that she loved him as much as he loved her, and he couldn't believe she consented so quickly. He didn't use the word love, but he didn't shy away from her. They had precious little time together before their non-wedding, due to interruptions of idiot, nosy villagers. But neither had they realized how little time they would be spending together, since at that point, they didn't know they'd both walk away from each other a few weeks hence.
Now they were willingly jumping back into the fray together, except there were new rules and at least one new participant and new dynamics.
They got a new house, as quickly as Martin was able to find one. While he looked for another place, they stayed at White Rose Cottage, which was too small for all three of them. His house would not do, since there was a constant parade of infectious villagers, not the sort of environment conducive to raising a newborn in a healthy environment. During the day, Martin headed over to the surgery (thank God, he was able to get his old post back before he was replaced permanently), and at lunchtime, he conducted a search of possible local homes that met his list of requirements: multiple bedrooms, bright open living spaces, a study for him to work in, a deck area where Louisa could enjoy a view of the sea, and a yard for Philip to play in when he got older.
He found the perfect place up the hill from where he lived previously, a bit closer to Joan's, and it really was the perfect house. It had a large kitchen area, which opened into a good sized family room. There was a study on the first floor, where Martin and Louisa could set up desks. A formal dining room completed the main rooms on the first floor. Upstairs, there were four bedrooms, including the master suite. One room was set up for Philip, and two guest rooms were also arranged. Martin would occasionally take advantage of sleeping there when he was on call at night, since his comings and goings could easily awake Louisa, and they both agreed, she needed every bit of sleep she could get what with feeding Philip and all.
Ever since returning from the hospital, first to White Rose Cottage, then to the new house, Martin and Louisa had shared a bed, although it wasn't an ideal arrangement. At first, they both wanted to share parenting responsibilities, taking care of the baby. They were pretty good at it. Philip slept a lot at first. They each loved holding him and just marveling at how peaceful he was. Martin loved watching Louisa and Philip sleep together, at nap times. They were his perfect nuclear family.
But as far as there being much in the way of romance, well, there really wasn't, especially at first. It was more nerves and each trying not to irritate the other too much. But trying to be good in and of itself was stressful. So they concentrated on their son, more than each other at first.
Philip was blond, and at first, rather slight in size. But he fed constantly, and never tired of consuming as much as he could. Every day, his resemblance to Martin became clearer. Joan had spotted it right away, how much Philip resembled Martin as a child. Philip was very clearly his son. His resemblance to Louisa was more in demeanor than actual looks. He liked looking at people, studying them intently, and eventually, when he smiled, his eyes twinkled in the same way as Louisa's, and his grin was infectious, just like hers.
While he looked like Martin, Philip loved laughing with Louisa. He watched every move she made … she talked to him, read him books, sang him songs. She told him wonderful stories … not that he would remember them later on, but what he responded to was the sound of her voice, her lilt, her colorful turn of phrase. She told him endless stories about the town and all the characters therein, as well as more traditional children's stories. It was easy to see why she'd been drawn to teaching – she was a natural at relating to children, especially their son. Martin couldn't help but think how lucky Philip was to be loved so much and so easily. He'd never had that kind of relationship with his parents.
Martin loved watching Louisa and Philip interact. He had been right, she was a wonderful mother. But as he was painfully aware, she was a lot more than Philip's mother. He couldn't believe how beautiful Louisa had become. Her presence, in such close proximity, was distracting beyond belief. He'd always maintained control when it came to sex and matters of the heart. Except with Louisa.
He was smitten all over again, but he didn't want to push things along too quickly, not wanting to drive her away. He still lacked at least one essential quality – knowing instinctively when was the right time to blurt out the first (painfully honest) thing that came to mind. He just couldn't bring himself to think or act diplomatically at any juncture, even when it would serve his own ends. For someone who paid attention to his patients' physical surroundings, he was remarkably unable to see those closest to him. He and Louisa were trying to behave well, but their lack of sleep, her hormones continuing to adjust, and the general awkwardness that had always been an undercurrent in their communications continued to plague them.
Simple things like Martin monitoring every bite of food she consumed for "optimal nutritional value" or watching her and the baby like a hawk for anything doctorly to which he could respond was enough to drive a sane person quite mad. Louisa too, was a bit brittle, what with the extra weight she was carrying, and the occasional thoughtless remark from Martin ("that weight will not easily shift, Louisa … shouldn't be eating empty calories" or some equally aggravating observation which really didn't benefit anyone). During her pregnancy, when she had been alone, she had erected a wall of seeming not to care what Martin thought, and it was hard to switch that behavior off, once it had been turned on. It was true that she loved him, probably more than ever, but she did not want to have her heart broken again. It was too painful.
After repeatedly stepping in it with Louisa on a regular basis, and it leading to awkward mini-rows and other misunderstandings, it began to dawn on him that perhaps he could apply the same behavioral modification techniques to his instant response reflexes that he had in conquering his blood phobia. The stakes were high – he wanted a happier homelife for his entire family … and it wasn't going to happen without some work on his part. Who knew, perhaps if it worked for him, he could persuade Louisa to curb her jumping to wrong conclusions about his intent about everything that came out of his mouth.
Unbeknownst to Louisa, he contacted Dr. Milligan and scheduled an appointment. Dr. Milligan was surprised to have Martin come in for something so personal, but was encouraged to learn how important relationships with his newly acquired family were to him. He became convinced that Martin's social ineptitude was a carefully erected wall of self-defense, learned in early childhood as a way of coping with parents who were cold, selfish and uncaring. That Martin had chosen a caring, helpful profession, that he was attracted to a woman who was a social magnet in their town, demonstrated that under his gruff exterior, there really was hope for him.
And Martin reveled in a challenge. When Joan had suggested that people couldn't change their behavior, he insisted he could, but he had never had a reason to do so. Well, now he was living with the two most important reasons. If he wanted a long and happier future, he would have to make a good faith effort to develop empathic skills and behavior, at least towards them. The villagers were another story. His ability to supply adequate, even superior, diagnostic and medical attention to all of the people in his care was fine … no need to adapt there, or so he thought. Best take one step at a time …
His sessions with Dr. Milligan were painfully difficult at first. Even as he recounted descriptions of conversations with Louisa, he didn't always understand or see where he went off the rails with her. In his mind, she was irrational in some of her responses. If Martin's descriptions were accurate, Dr. Milligan had to agree that there were times that Louisa's reactions were not particularly "rational." However, given that they lived together and that the ultimate goal was to engender a more harmonious living situation, he embarked on a course of providing Martin with appropriate responses in every type of situation. The goal of every conversation wasn't to be right, necessarily. At first, it was just to get along with each other, rather than antagonize each other.
Louisa was pleasantly surprised, and shocked, at how with a little positive reinforcement from her as his conversational skills improved, at the transformation of her gruff, monosyllabic … well, he wasn't her husband yet, but that's how she was beginning to think of him. At home and in private, they were beginning to get along better and better. To be sure, there were the daily challenges of sleep deprivation, constant interruptions from the villagers whose intrusiveness really knew no boundaries, and even from the helpful, but also somewhat intrusive, visits from Joan, who loved seeing Philip and was herself delighted in how much happier Louisa and Martin seemed. Given the pressures that had brought them together so abruptly, they were becoming devoted to each other, at least in private.
It was time to make it official. Immediately following Philip's birth, Martin had blurted out his insistence that they get married and "make it official." He was conventional in his outlook, after all, and didn't see the point in waiting. Since they had mucked it up the first time, Louisa was a little less persuaded that they needed to rush into anything. Why not give the living together and adapting to each other a chance to work first, was her point of view. They'd already produced a child outside the confines of marriage … why not test – and prove – the strength of their commitment to each other and their child before making it official? Seemed perfectly reasonable to her, at this point in their lives. As the months passed, however, and as they became more cohesive as a family unit, it was becoming apparent that when they married, it was going to be a confirmation of their love for each other.
Because that was the foundation of their relationship. Despite their silly misunderstandings over fairly trivial things, they were falling in love all over again. Each passing day solidified their love for each other – whether it was Martin's making an effort (superhuman on his part) to modify his behavior into really trying to understand her and take what she said more seriously, or her effort to include him in decisions and parenting and everything else. They each had been so independent for so long, used to governing their own actions without the need to consult another or take another's point of view, that they both had to learn new behavior.
Louisa tried to demonstrate her growing appreciation for how hard Martin was working on acquiring new social skills, at least with her and Philip. She marveled at how well he learned to do all of the baby care things – changing him, bathing him, monitoring his health at regular intervals. She was even more amazed by how he was bonding with Philip (with her encouragement) by talking to him. There was no baby talk; that would have been beyond Martin's ability. But Martin found himself having little private conversations with Philip, practicing some of his emerging social skills on a baby who was sometimes rapt with Martin's attention, but who couldn't argue with him or talk back.
"So today, Dr. Milligan suggested that I practice being thankful out loud, in regular conversation. What does that mean, I asked, and he responded that I need to think every morning of the people or things I'm grateful for, and then tell someone about it. As I need someone to practice on, my boy, I'm going to start with you because I'm thankful that you listen so attentively and seem to appreciate my point of view. In fact, I would say you're the one who appreciates my point of view more than anyone. Well, I'm going to assume that because we fellows have to stick together in matters of importance. I hope to have a better relationship with you than my own father had with me. I'm thankful that I appear to already have that. You agree with me on all key points. In this regard, I'm a lucky father. And we're both lucky to have your mother. I'm thankful every day that she had the good sense to let me back into her life. Yes, she is beautiful, isn't she? I quite agree with you on that point. We are two exceptionally lucky guys."
Having heard Martin talking, Louisa couldn't help but be drawn into the hallway outside the Philip's nursery. As she listened to every word, she was touched. By how Martin was taking to being a father, how he interacted with his son, his confidence growing every day. And she loved that he and Philip would be bonding as the men in the family … that seemed to be Martin's intent, and that confirmed how right she had been to allow him back into their lives. Why had she ever excluded him?
But when the monologue (was it a conversation if only one party was talking?) turned to how lucky they were to have her in their lives, her eyes filled with tears. She felt exactly the same way. Her home life had never been stable, what with an itinerant father, who was at best unreliable, at worst a minor criminal and an absent mother who had been gone for most of her life. The only person she'd ever been able to rely on was herself, and she was completely self made. That's why her current position as Head of Portwenn Primary was so important to her. She loved being a recognized and contributing member of the local community and participated actively in many of the local goings on. But on a personal level, she'd never had a satisfactory long-term relationship or much of a family. Nor had she ever had a longstanding, satisfying relationship with a man.
She had always been attracted to interesting men, and dated some here and there, but always keenly aware that not one of them was long-term relationship material. Upon meeting, and being offended by, Martin during his interview, she found herself unexpectedly attracted to him when it appeared that his interest in her had been for her welfare in diagnosing her glaucoma, not in making inappropriate advances. She realized that he was one dimensional professionally, but suspected that there was more going on under the surface or at least hidden from view. And, God help her, that thought alone was drawing her in.
The fact that he was somewhat unapproachable also represented a challenge. Louisa liked a bit of challenge and a bit of mystery. Having grown up in Portwenn, there weren't any local men who were of the slightest interest to her sexually. Other than Danny's reappearing for a while, no one had really sparked any kind of … well, spark for her. Until she met Martin.
Their charged interactions were stimulating in the extreme. He could be so irritating, but like many women, she viewed men as moldable clay – something to be worked or shaped into something better if there were enough "good stuff" there to be worthwhile shaping into something better. That's what it was all about, right? Finding a man who had appropriate values and ideas and then finding out if there was any chemistry between them that would signal the all important: it's time to make him better. Martin was an esteemed professional – a famous surgeon who had chosen to become the local GP. Intellectually, he was her superior in many ways.
So, a point for Martin. He also had a lot of personal presence. For one, he was tall and imposing, with an oddly regal manner of holding himself. He wasn't classically good looking – with those ears that stuck out a bit further from his head than might be thought handsome. The way he dressed was a bit formal for village life. She thought it would be nice from time to time to see him in more casual clothes, and, God forbid, not wearing a tie.
His manner added to his imposing presence. Gruff, abrupt, arrogantly "right" about everything, seemingly lacking a social filter, prone to acting decisively without always verifying key facts, but always in the name of putting the health of those in his care first. As she got to know him, it was that core value of demonstrated caring which became increasingly appealing to her. Despite his gruffness and rudeness, she felt she could trust him as her doctor because she believed he would always put her health first, which was an ideal trait in a health professional.
She couldn't help feeling that underneath that somewhat harsh exterior, there was a good person, and an attractive man/challenge. She wanted to know him better.
That desire had led to the infamous incident between them, of sharing several bottles of wine, him confessing his attraction to and love for her, to be followed by his denial of having said any of those things and to accusing her of stalking him for all the wrong reasons. Erotomania, my arse, she thought. He actually said the words he loved her before she ever did. She had not lost her faculties the way he had, and that seed, once planted in her psyche, grew.
She had taken the initiative multiple times, inviting him for dinner and later, to the concert. She wanted to explore whether they could get closer and possibly have some sort of a future together. When all seemed insurmountable, and she sadly declared she couldn't see him any longer, that they had no future, things seemed grim indeed. Only to turn around during the following few days, when he unexpectedly proposed marriage following his treatment of Holly and her being reminded of why she had initially been so attracted to him. Things between them would never be easy.
Maybe that's why they would have an interesting future together. Maybe a marriage of inconvenience was not out of the question. With such inauspicious beginnings, one might assume that they were never going to get out of the starting blocks and they very nearly hadn't. But once launched into their future, they both seemed to be embracing it, cautiously, but also optimistically because there was reason for optimism, probably tinged with some concern.
Louisa for her part, determined to show Martin that his willingness to try and change was greatly appreciated. Being the more demonstrative of the two, she embarked on her own campaign to change and demonstrate in words and actions how much she loved Martin. Because she did. If the truth is known, she loved him to distraction. She loved his presence. His sheer size when he would wrap his arms around her was comforting and stimulating all at the same time. She loved touching him, and him touching her.
When he was studying in the office, or sitting on the couch, reading a book, she loved putting her arms around his neck and distracting him from whatever he was doing, reassuring him physically how much she appreciated and loved him. As they grew more comfortable around each other. she was often rewarded by him grabbing her and kissing her soundly. He had not known the reliability of such physical comfort and delight in his entire life. At first, he was a little intimidated by her seeming forwardness, but he found that he liked being the object of her affections. It demonstrated to him her attraction to him. He didn't really understand it or her – no one in his life before had demonstrated such appreciation for him. And when he looked in a mirror, he could recognize that on a general social scale, Louisa was like a nine out of ten, whereas, under the best of circumstances, he was more of a six or a seven. He was concerned that he wasn't an equal match for her and was a bit afraid that someday, she'd wake up and realize she could do better than him.
In her mind, though, the physical attributes she particularly liked coupled with his ability to learn to do anything – cook masterfully, operate, fix things – well, those other things more than made up for any physical shortcomings. And oddly, she didn't regard herself as that great a catch either. With the baggage of her upbringing, and her modest living in a small town, and the fact that she was 37 and unmarried with no real prospects thus far, well, she wasn't getting any younger. She didn't think that she was picky when it came to relationships, but neither was she willing to settle for the wrong one.
So as their relationship blossomed in the wake of Philip's birth, and widened to include him, a dimension neither one had anticipated was added to each of their lives.
Observing Martin's strict carbohydrate curfew by eating early every night, they adopted a routine of dining early, and then retiring to work on projects. Louisa's main project at the moment was Philip. She loved talking to him and playing with him. He was alert and studious, even before he could speak. It was clear that he was absorbing information from the world around him. He watched Martin observing things, and so he copied that behavior. He tried to talk when they spoke to him. To date, there was no intelligible speech, but they knew it was a matter of time before he would be babbling away.
They both loved how happy a baby he was. When not staring intently, as if to study whatever was in front of him, he "interacted" with whomever was taking care of him at that moment. He smiled and babbled. He loved being around Martin too, a fact of which Martin was secretly very proud. His boy, a child he had never imagined having, loved being held by him, talked to by him, and snuggling with him. It was humbling and thrilling all at once for Martin, who had not known such affection as a youngster, except from Aunty Joan and Uncle Phil. As a socially shy child, and somewhat inept, he had not learned the finer points of human interactions, except how to survive when he was sent away to school at a very young age. There he learned that if he excelled gradewise and skillwise, at least the adults would leave him alone. Once he discovered an interest, and subsequent skill for, medicine, he applied himself whole heartedly, since there were few distractions in his life.
When Edith had taken him on as a bit of a project, and it graduated to an intimate relationship, Martin had imagined himself in love with her and brought her home to meet Joan and Phil. But at the first test of their relationship, Edith made it clear she was career oriented first, and Martin, while a nice diversion, was not going to derail her professional ambitions. She left for a fantastic opportunity in Canada, and until he ran into her following his non-marriage to Louisa, he hadn't really thought about her.
Although Edith was his intellectual equal, he found that being in her company only made him hark back to every interaction with Louisa. He respected Edith's intellect, but he craved Louisa's spark and warmth. As he watched Louisa struggle through her pregnancy, alone, helped by Joan and Bert and Al and other villagers, he was perplexed at her attitude but he was hurt too. He offered to take her for her antenatal appointments at the hospital in Truro, but she wouldn't accept any help from him. Every time he tried to talk to her about the practicalities of his contributing towards the care and upbringing of their child, she would get indignant or misunderstand him, deliberately, so it seemed to him at the time. True, her hormones were raging and her body was undergoing a huge and scary transformation. She was alone, pregnant and antagonistically involved with the father of her child. It was perplexing and extremely depressing. But she didn't want to rely on Martin, because she had independently made the decision to raise their child – with or without his help. She didn't ask for it, because she was afraid he would say no. So rather than open the rejection door even a crack, she made sure he knew she was determined to go it alone.
After Philip's birth and seeing how much work a small baby entailed, she realized how hard it would have been to negotiate daily life without Martin. He prepared a great many of their meals, and helped with shopping and other necessities. She tended to take care of the laundry and house upkeep, to the extent her work and Philip allowed. In buying their house, Martin had contributed the lion's share of the down payment, but they both contributed towards the mortgage and all operational expenses.