Disclaimer: I don't own the Hunger Games.

Summary: Clove kills Katniss and Peeta survives...kind of. Warning: Very Dark additional warning inside.

Warning: Very very dark I mean really really dark. Rated mostly for violence and darkness but also for nudity and mentions of non explicit sex.

Spoilers: Only for hunger games.


"I don't know how to say it exactly. Only... I want to die as myself. I don't want them to change me in there. Turn me into some kind of monster that I'm not. I keep wishing I could think of a way to...to show the Capitol that they don't own me. That I'm more than just a piece in their Games."- Peeta Mellark.


His heart stopped for a moment as he saw Katniss in the distance lying on the ground. He made sure his feet were extra loud as they chased after her, to his relief before they reached her she was on her feet and running away. He hoped that she was less damaged by the fire then they were and could outrun them.

He watched as she made her way quickly up a tree and took a deep breath as they slowed to a stop, they all looked at Katniss in the tree. She was very far up but looked down at them from her position in the tree. Peeta looked around at the Careers who were grinning and snarling at Katniss up in the tree. Even if he were to attack them how far would he get before the careers mowed him down and then went after Katniss? He reminded himself that he swore to protect her, but if he acted now he'd be dead in seconds and Katniss's life would still be in danger. Besides none of the careers were climbing due to their massive bulk.

"How is everything with you?" Katniss's voice came down from the tree and Peeta did his best to not grimace, she just had to rub it in didn't she?

"Well enough." says Cato. "Yourself?"

"It's been a bit warm for my taste." came Katniss's reply and Peeta really wished that she would not talk anymore. "The air's better up here, why don't you come on up?"

"I think I will."

"Here take this Cato." says Glimmer and she tried to hand him the bow and sheath of arrows. Peeta started to polish his knife and he felt Katniss's eyes on him. He couldn't look up at her knowing that she thought that he betrayed her. If he looked up he wasn't sure he could keep up the illusion and if the illusion fails then he couldn't protect her. Cato pushes back the bow and arrow.

"No I can do better with my sword." he took his sword from his belt and Peeta considered just going for it and attacking Cato, even if he only lasts long enough for Katniss to get away. However as soon as Cato made his way into the tree Katniss started to climb further up. Peeta hid the grin that wants to escape from his face, that was Katniss he loved, smart and resourceful. He watched Cato move much slower than Katniss up the tree and then before he got even halfway to Katniss he fell to the ground, hard. Although not hard enough to keep him down very long.

Glimmer had her turn next, only to have the branches crack under her feet and she stopped before she fell out of the tree like Cato did. When she got back to the ground she aimed an arrow at Katniss, who was at the moment so high in the tree he could barely see her. He had started to feel a little more comfortable until Glimmer had taken out an arrow and strung it. He held his breath as Glimmer took aim. Should he attack her?He remembered her not being terribly accurate with the arrows, she wasn't nearly as good as Katniss was with a bow. It was that knowledge and that knowledge alone that stopped him from tackling her to the ground, and instead he watched uneasily as she shot arrows at the love of his life. Thankfully missing every single time.

The Careers turned towards each other and they grumbled about Katniss, he turned towards them to look like he was part of the conversation even though he didn't say anything. Peeta thought that once it was over he could convince them to wait until she come down, hoping that Katniss will think of a way to get away. She was smart like that. Peeta knew that they wouldn't take his suggestion until their window of opportunity started to close, which should be soon.

He didn't see it right away, he was too focused on the conversation with the others and thinking that he could buy Katniss time. It was only when Peeta heard the cry that he saw it. Clove had taken up Glimmer's bow and arrow that she had put down some time ago when the argument had begun; she had shot Katniss. He hoped that while she was hurt she was still okay, but that hope is quickly dashed when all the sudden Katniss smashed onto the ground. There was a large wound in her chest, and the arrow was still sticking out of it. Blood was covering her chest and he could see some trailing out of her mouth, the 80 feet fall couldn't have made it any better. Her breathing was shallow and Peeta could tell that she was on the edge of death. The last thing she did was look at him, her eyes full of betrayal.

Clove grinned, happy that she had hit (a cannon sounds he mentally amended that to killed) the love of Peeta's life. He wasn't quite sure what happened, only that a rage had taken over him. He took his knife and rammed it into Clove's neck. Everyone else didn't notice since they had stepped forward to look at Katniss's body. He was behind the others as well, he was able to stab Cato in the heart before he even realized what was going on. Clove hasn't made a noise since he had stabbed her in the neck. Cato however had made a noise before falling down to the ground. Glimmer, Marvel and Autumn all turned around at the sound and looked surprised, which gave him a one second head start. He stabbed Glimmer before taking his knife out and running. Marvel and Autumn were hot on his trail and he hardly noticed the cannons go off as he ran as hard as he could to get away.

He jolted awake, there wasn't a scream on his lips, it had been a long time since they had been one. He almost wished that he would scream because at least then it would mean that he felt something and something might be better than the nothing that he always felt. Everything had changed after Katniss had died, after he had failed to save her. He had gone into a blood filled rage and had taken out 3 of careers in less than a minute. Honestly, the only reason he had been able to so was the element of surprise. That and he had taken down the first two in the back, which was cowardly, but if he had tried it from the front then he would have been dead in seconds. That was not even to mention the fact that he was so angry he hadn't exactly been thinking about cowardice.

Peeta glanced about the unfamiliar apartment he was in. He was laying nude on a bed a few inches away from an equally naked capital women he couldn't remember the name of. She was thin with blue skin and pink hair. It no longer bothered him the way it used to in the beginning, waking up in the same bed with women and occasionally men whose first names he couldn't remember and no longer even tried to. It was required that he stay the night so that his clients didn't feel like had hired someone for their needs, even though that's what they had done.

He had been spared from this until he had turned 18 and then the Capitol made it very clear he had to do this or his family and his district would suffer for it. He remembered the feelings of shame and embarrassment, but only like it was a whispery shadow. He no longer felt that way; he no longer felt anything.

Wait that wasn't completely true, he did feel angry. Almost all the time. He wasn't quite sure who or what the anger was directed at, or really he knew, but he didn't delve deeply just kept the anger simmering on the surface; it was better that way less painful. He made his way out of the high quality sheets of the bed that the people in the district 12 couldn't even dream about and made his way to the window, where he could see the capitol splayed out before him

.

How he hated the capital. They had made the games that killed Katniss, along with his innocence and who he used to be. Yet he worked for them day and night in other people's beds and for what? To protect people that didn't even like him. District 12 had not welcomed him back with open arms. They ate the food they were given because no one could say no to free food, but they all treated him like he had a contagious sickness.

Katniss had been well loved in District 12. She had gone outside the fence and brought game to the poor starving town. Peeta on the other hand was seen as someone who had lied and said he was in love with Katniss to gain sympathy, and then had betrayed her to the careers, and lastly that he had used her death to further himself along in the games.

There were few people who knew the truth. Haymitch who knew that he had really cared for Katniss who knew because he had told Haymitch that he would do whatever was necessary to ensure her survival. It had been Haymitch's idea to become a career, he had said it was the best way to protect her from the other careers, like that had gone so well. Delly was the second she had been his best friend and knew that Peeta would never have purposely have harmed her or allowed her to be harmed. Finnick was the last. Peeta and Finnick were the two top most wanted men in all of Panam. They used to take solace in each other knowing what the other had gone through, but that was before he had become empty except for the rage. He had no use for companionship now.

There was no room left except for the rage. He wished that he could burn the whole city to the ground, but he doubted with the level of technology he get through one house before they put the fire out. Fire...like the fire that had taken his family away. In a place like District 12 with coal all over the place, fire was particularly dangerous and bakeries had fire all the time. His family was usually very careful, but he supposed that one of them got distracted either... that or someone else from the town killed them in retaliation. Gale had tried to kill him once with a bow and arrow not long after he had gotten back from the Capitol the first time around. He had spent the next six months in solitude beefing himself up so that no one could threaten his life again.

It was part of the reason the ladies and sometimes men wanted him so much was the shape he kept his body in. At 18 when he started doing this he had thought of doing what Haymitch had done: making himself unappealing so no one would want him. However at that point in his life exercise gave him some measure of control and the capitol had threatened his family and the people of district 12.

His family had died when he was 20, and he only kept doing what he did because at that point his emotions had dulled to just angry. He didn't care what he did or where he did it. He had been doing this for 5 years, losing more and more of himself each day; which was difficult to see since he was hardly a slip of who he used to be. Peeta had never reveled in killing anyone, or found so much pleasure from doing it the way he had at the games. In fact he was pretty sure that killing Marvel was the last time he had really felt alive. Peeta heard some shifting from the bed and fought the urge to growl at her to shut up and not to talk to him.

"Peeta, honey, come back to bed." she said softly like they were dating and she wasn't paying for this experience. He was supposed to go with it, if he didn't things would get bad. Bad for whom? Him? The District? He wasn't sure he cared any longer. He hadn't even seen District 12 in more than a year, since due to his popularity the capitol decide to save some money and instead of running a train to him each time they made him stay in the capitol. Which he didn't mind, he hated the capitol, but it had less memories and less people who hated him. He stayed where he was despite the fact he normally was supposed to do whatever the woman or man wanted him to do.

"Peeta come back to bed." this time it was laced with confusion since he wasn't immediately doing what she said.

"Shut up." he whispered underneath his breath hoping she'd heard him and the same time hoping she hadn't; although he wasn't exactly sure what would happen if she didn't heed his warning though.

"Peeta."

"Shut up!" he said louder and spun around to see the women clutching the sheet to her body and staring at him scared and confused.

"Peeta-" The rage in him was way too full, too immense and he found his body going to the bed very quickly, a grin replacing his previously angry look. He got on top of her stomach and she stopped looking scared and grinned.

"Two for one?" she asked. That what she thought this was? That they were going to have another go, she couldn't be more mistaken. Peeta reached over for his pants, which had a knife sticking out of them. He took the knife everywhere, even though there wasn't really much crime or much need for it in the Capitol.

He hesitated for a moment, his hand clasped to the handle of his knife, but the blade was still hidden by his pants. The women had done nothing wrong other then ask him a question. Then again he had done nothing wrong except live and love, so he supposed that that made them the same.

The noise canceler was on since the women had claimed that she was very noisy, no one would be able to hear her screams. He trailed a hand lightly down the side of her face in a way that was more personal than any of the other nights he had had since he had started doing this. She shivered under his touch and she grinned at him. He grinned back at her but for an entirely different reason. She wouldn't be smiling soon.

He took the knife out of his pants, but she was focused on him and hadn't noticed. He slowly brought the knife closer to himself looking at her eyes waiting for the moment that she saw it. It took a few moments before her eyes left his face and focused on the knife. Her eyes went wide with terror, she tried to struggle, but Peeta was on top of her and she couldn't move out from underneath him. She screamed, her screams filled the apartment. He grinned as he brought the knife down and in one quick motion cut her throat just like he had cut Cloves; as he cut her throat he screamed as well. Blood splashed him, covering his naked torso in her blood and in that moment the rage was gone.


A/N: I'm sorry I had to write this because it would not leave my head until I did fyi this is inspired by a song called Killer by The Hoosiers

Review please but please don't flame as this is my first Hunger Games Fanfiction :) If people like it and review I may add another chapter or two if the inspiration strikes.