Math + Death Note = CRACK
Summary: What if L, Mello, and the rest of the gang invaded my math class? Be warned, as crack will follow. Rated T for swearing.
Disclaimer: Nope, don't own.
Also, all people except the teachers, the task force, and Watari are 12 or 13.
Ms. Allgood (my math teacher): Although trapezoids, squares, rectangles, parallelograms, and rhombuses are all quadrilaterals…blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah…
Avery (me): Sweet mother of crap, this is boring.
Kaitlyn (my worst enemy): What's your problem, freak?
Avery: Shut up, you stupid empousa.
Kaitlyn: What? What did you just call me? Ms. Allgood, hold my earrings. I'm about to go Chuck Norris on this girl!
*bickering continues*
*Mrs. Resa, the Vice Principal, comes in.*
Mrs. Resa: Ms. Allgood?
Ms. Allgood: And parallelograms are characterized by-yes, Mrs. R.?
Mrs. Resa: We have a crapload of new students, and they are all in your class this period, for some reason.
Ms. Allgood: Oh. Kaaayy.
*Death Note characters come in*
Avery: SQUEE! YOU'RE THE CHARACTERS FROM DEATH NOTE! OMIGOD! *glomps L* L! YOU'RE SO AWESOME! SQUEE!
Mary: *looks up* SQUEE! IT'S THE PEOPLE FROM DEATH NOTE! *glomps Mello* MELLO! YOU'RE THE GREATEST! SQUEE!
Kaitlyn: What are you freaks going on about?
Alyssa (my other friend): What's Death Note?
Mary and Avery, in unison: Oh. My.
Mary: Kira.
Avery: L.
L: Um…get off me, please.
Mello: Get the hell away from me before I shoot you!
Mary and Avery, in unison: Sorry.
Ms. Allgood: *eye twitches*
Light: Why won't anyone glomp me? I'm cool, right?
Misa: SQUEE! Misa-Misa will glomp Light! Misa-Misa LOVES Light!
Near: *plays with naked Barbies*
Barbie 1: Do you like waffles?
Barbie 2: Yeah, we like waffles!
Barbie 1: Do you like pancakes?
Barbie 2: Yeah, we like pancakes!
Barbie 1: Do you like French toast?
Barbie 2: Yeah, we like French toast!
Both Barbies: Doo doo da doo, can't wait to get a mouthful! WAFFLES!
Near: *eats naked Barbies* Om nom nom nom nom!
Lisa (another friend): Hi, Near. You're cute.
Near: HEAR THAT, MELLO? I TOLD YOU I'M CUTE!
Mikami: *to Light* God?
Avery: L.
L: Yes, Avery-san?
Avery: Light is Kira!
Light: Screw you, Avery. If Ryuk would give me back my Death Note, I'd-
Matsuda: *pretending to be a plane* WHEE! WHEE! WHEE! I'M AN AIRPLANE!
Tray (total dumb***): Oh yeah, baby.
L: What?
Tray: It's an inside joke.
L: Um…allright.
Avery: L, you look like a panda.
*entire class stops*
Paulina: Omigosh, he's a panda!
Kaylan (Kay-LEE-On): He's very panda-like, isn't he?
*murmurs of agreement*
Light: *Explaining Death Note to Alyssa*
Alyssa: So, you and L aren't gay lovers?
Light: No.
Alyssa: Are you sure?
Light: *facepalms*
L: I'M STRAIGHT, YOU PERVERTS!
Matt: *starts smoking*
L: *smokes Smarties*
Ms. Allgood: Good Lord, what is going on here?
L: It's very simple. We are all in a fanfic and are therefore extremely OOC.
Edward Cullen: I'M GAY!
Everyone: We all know, Edward.
Justin Bieber: I'm gay, too!
Everyone: We all know, Justin.
Edward and Justin: *disappear*
Near: HOLY MOTHER OF BISCUITS!
L: What is it, Near-chan?
Near: In Health, we're learning…Sexual Education.
L: *gasps in horror*
Avery and Mary: *giggling*
Mello: I'M A CUCUMBER!
Matt: UNICORNS ON RUNESCAPE ARE LEVEL 15!
Kaitlyn: O.o
Avery: I LOVE L! HE'S AWESOME AND CUTE AND-
L: You are insane.
Avery: I know! It's so much fun!
Light: L is insaner.
L: Insaner, really?
Jesus Christ: OMG. What did my dad do?
God: Hey! One of the seraphs gave me some crack!
L: *looks up in wonder* God is a crackhead?
God: Yup.
Ms. Allgood: *spontaneously combusts*
Matsuda: ahthrjkejt hmrjhbwjntgjkrgjk;ltgjk;rgjklh gntjkghjnhr tnjhrtjkjkthrth rtn jhrtjnhgnrjkbnf gijhsnkblrgjkhgjm bsk/hlji owjrigo 'nib68i roew44nf vcdjk gbdha nvjhfbdvf!
Mary: Mello… *glomps Mello*
Mello: Not again…
L: Oh noes! My cupcake died!
Avery: NO! NOT THE CUPCAKES!
Mikami: Ryuk!
Ryuk: APPLES!
Avery: What the L is wrong with us?
God: I toldja, I'm on crack.
Avery: *nods* That makes sense.
Aizawa's afro: Wazzuuuuuuuuuup? *Scary Movie style*
Soichiro's mustache: So, are you alone?
Aizawa's afro: Yo, Kira, pick up the phone!
Light: Wazzuuuuuuuuuup?
Soichiro's mustache: Wazzuuuuuuuuuu-
Light: uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu-
Aizawa's afro: uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu-
L: uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu-
Avery: uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu-
Mary: uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu-
Alyssa" *still has no idea what's going on*
Aizawa's afro: So, what are you up to?
Soichiro's mustache: Just hanging around, chilling, killing.
Aizawa's afro: True…true…
Mary: At first, I was like, ROTFLMAO, but then I realized she was dead…
Mello: What?
Mary: Nothing.
Avery: Mary's just insane, that's all…
Mello:…
Near: I play with more than just toys…
Watari: WTF?
Near: IDK.
L: Why are you two speaking in text-language?
Near: ROFTL!
Watari: Liek, IDK, dude. IDK…
L: Um…
Avery: Uh… *glomps L*
L: Really? Again?
Avery: Yeah. I'm a fangirl, whaddya expect?
Mello: *blows things up*
*More pandemonium*
Later….
My Mom: How was school.
Avery: Meh. The usual.
L: *pops up out of nowhere* Hi!
My Mom: Uh… *eyes twitches*
Mary: Hey, just like Ms. Allgood!
L: No! Not more crack!
FIN