Fopilicious

By Elenmir and Sulwen at elenmir1@yahoo.com and miki3620@yahoo.com respectively.

This is our first post here and we hope you enjoy it. The title and main concept belongs to our friend Laurel and the breakdancing idea came from AriesSolar's Le Fantome: The Documentary. Last but not least, we credit Raoul for inspiring this piece. We don't own any of the characters, especially Raoul... It goes to the song by Destiny's Child, and we kept many of the original lyrics to help bring out the inner fop in Raoul, it wasn't that hard.

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Everyone is gathered on the stage for a mysterious important announcement, even Erik shows up. Raoul takes center stage, cues the maestro as weird sounding music begins and he starts flailing as he sort of sings. He looks at each person as he says their name. They stare back perplexed.

Christine, can you handle this?
Erik, can you handle this?
Carlotta, can you handle this?
I don't think they can handle this.


Take a look, I've arrived,
Lookin sexy, lookin' fly.
Box 5, with me tonight.

Erik grumbles.

Looking for my Little Lotte,
There you are, come on baby.
Don't you wanna dance with me?
Can you handle, handle me?

Raoul opens his arm beckoning Christine to join him. She rolls her eyes and looks away.

You gotta like my style since I'm gonna dance for you tonight.
My charm is too much for you cause you're gonna dance with me tonight.

By your looks I can tell you'd like to see more,
With these great skills on the floor,
I've got moves I bet you've never seen before.
So just watch out, these steps might burn you.

Everyone in attendance shakes their heads at him and tries to look away, but they can't it's like watching a train wreck. Raoul dances around in an unknown manner – he is kicking, jumping, rolling around on the floor and bumping into props.

I don't think you're ready for de Chagny,
I don't think you're ready for de Chagny,
I don't think your ready for this,
Cos my body too fopilicious for ya babe.

I don't think you're ready for de Chagny,
I don't think you're ready for de Chagny,
I don't think your ready for this,
Cos my body too fopilicious for ya babe.

He stands back up, bobbing his head from side to side, and looks at Christine.

Baby, can you handle this?
Baby, can you handle this?
Baby, can you handle this?
I don't think you can handle this.


Goldilocks with out the bears -
Blond hair, cute face.
Jackets crisp, expensive ties,
Muscled build, gorgeous eyes,
Lookin' hot, smellin' good.
Groovin' like you knew I would.
Package like me, how can you miss?
Can you handle, handle this?

Raoul starts prancing around the stage as he does ballet moves and pointing at random people with every statement. Madame Giry notes how naturally prancing comes to him.

I don't think you're ready for de Chagny,
I don't think you're ready for de Chagny,
I don't think your ready for this,
Cos my body too fopilicious for ya babe.

I don't think you're ready for de Chagny,
I don't think you're ready for de Chagny,
I don't think your ready for this,
Cos my body too fopilicious for ya babe.

He starts failing wildly.

My my body up and down.
Swing my arms from side to side.
I can't help but wonder why,
Is this fop too fopilicious for you, babe?

I wave my money at every chance.
When I whip out my wallet you slip into a trance.
I'm hoping you can handle all this power that I have.
Now step aside while I, I, break dance.

Raoul tries badly to breakdance and the he attempts to do the splits

Ha ha hay ha ow ha hay
Ha ha hay ha ow ha hay ha how
Ha ha hay ow, ow, ow.........

Raoul is yelling in a higher-pitched voice now.

I don't think you're ready for de Chagny,
I don't think you're ready for de Chagny,
I don't think your ready for this,
Cos my body too fopilicious for ya babe.

I don't think you're ready for de Chagny,
I don't think you're ready for de Chagny,
I don't think your ready for this,
Cos my body too fopilicious for ya babe.

He starts doing line kicks, giving it all he has.

I don't think you're ready for de Chagny,
I don't think you're ready for de Chagny,
I don't think your ready for this,
Cos my body too fopilicious for ya babe.

Raoul finishes grandly and turns around to bow. Not a sound emanates from the stage.... because it's empty. Raoul regards himself saying, I guess I was just too much for them. He walks away as the lights fade out.