Lost and Found

A/N: Disclaimer: I don't own FMA. Post series/spoilers. I wonder how Alphonse Heiderich would feel like, being treated like Ed's little brother all the time.

Very light implications of Al Heiderich/Ed (Heido, whatever it's called.) It seems more like brotherly love/friendship/cheese unless you want it to be otherwise.

After weeks of endlessly pouring rain, it was finally a relatively average day in Munich. Crows cawed, weeds were slightly less dead-looking than before, and here and there a person would be trampled to near-death by angry mobs protesting in the farmer's market. Tall columns of townhouses bowed over paved streets, packed together in claustrophobic fashion, like strangers forced to stand shoulder to shoulder in an awkward line.

But at the end of one street a particularly large building stood alone, estranged from its neighbors like a rotting tree stump in the remnants of a burned down field. It was oak brown and looked as though it had not only lived through a storm but was also born from one; yet its huge, dark windows and haunted appearance nevertheless emitted an impressive aura demanding respect. Locals walked past this building with deliberate briskness, and children who knew no better would dare each other to throw stones at the windows, only to run away shrieking in gleeful terror before witnessing the repercussions of doing such an act.

The fact that this building was also known to emit disturbing noises only added to its intimidation. Such was the case observed on this particular day; the silence was broken abruptly by the sound of slamming doors and a particularly irritated voice shouting what sounded like muffled curses-what was being said was incomprehensible but nevertheless anyone in hearing distance got the gist of it, before briskly retreating out of range. The curses were followed by assorted clunking noises.

"A—l!" the irritated voice called from within. That voice belonged to a figure whose small appearance would at first seem anticlimactic to any of the nervous locals who found the mansion and its mystery inhabitants to be intimidating; still, that same figure had the ability to once again instill terror and respect into anyone who would dare suggest that he seemed rather short.

Edward Elric made his way down the wooden stairs with difficulty. He silently cursed his artificial limbs for being useless and restricting; he also bitterly resented the house for its huge size, which made navigating it a tedious task for someone who was missing an arm and a leg.

A staccato of noise resounded throughout the house with every one of Edward's hasty steps as he gracefully ascended the stairs.. Tap, THUNK, tap…THUNK, tap THUNK…

The old glass windows vibrated dangerously as an angry Edward thunk-ed his way into the dining room. His mouth was open and ready to lecture Alphonse Heiderich-roommate, lab partner, and possible-brother-from-another-universe- about his increasingly frequent disappearances and how it was taking its toll on the shorter boy's certainly shorter life span.

Ed paused, frowning widely. Once again he had stumbled into an empty room; Alphonse was not in the dining room as Ed had hoped he was, and a quick glance at an empty kitchen shelf revealed that apparently a chunk of their precious food supply had vanished as well.

Wondering where Alphonse (and the food) disappeared to, Edward began to scourge the house once more. As he passed through each empty room, Edward became increasingly nervous; Al wasn't found in the washrooms or in his bedroom; the study was devoid of human life and Ed did not find Al lurking around the library as he usually was, pooling over books and documentaries…

On the verge of panicking, Edward rushed (as fast as his artificial leg allowed him to) into the entrance hall.

The door that led to the front parlor was left slightly ajar.

Edward stood with his mouth slightly open as a cool breeze crept into the room, blowing the door open and providing Ed a generous view of the neglected grass that lay dying on the front lawn. Edward sighed exasperatedly and glowered bleakly at the sun, which was shining a bit too brightly.

Well, now he had to venture out of the safety of his study room to search for Alphonse.

"A—l! Alphonse Heiderich!" Edward called out as he fought his way through crowds that had gathered in the nearby farmer's market. He had no idea why so many people were there that day; perhaps one of the vendors had offered a generous discount of 'buy 30 apples for 5,000,000 Marks each and get the sixth one for 50 Marks off'. Edward yelped as a he barely avoided being stepped on ("Damn those people for being so tall!") and glowered through the crowd as he caught a fleeting glimpse of the barely edible merchandise- apples for sale, and nearly rotten ones at that. The whole food situation was becoming increasingly worrisome. One day, he resolved, Edward would lock up their food storage so Al wouldn't be able to sneak any of it out anymore. Not that Edward minded the fact that Alphonse was most likely doing some sort of a heroic deed or act of kindness with the food (as it was Alphonse, of course, a good person, and not some "lousy, shoddy, barbaric, decomposing, second-rate pathetic-excuse-for-a-man" like his father was.) However, if whatever Alphonse was doing was at the cost of the two's rapidly diminishing food supply as well as the cost of Edward's health, then Ed decided that it wasn't worth it.

Edward was constantly worrying due to Alphonse's tendency to wander around during their few breaks from studying. He was fine with having Al get some fresh air—being cooped up for hours and even days in a row is certainly not the most beneficial choice in terms of taking care of your body. In fact, Edward would encourage Alphonse to get out more and breathe air that was free from the musty smell of old books, if it weren't for the fact that Alphonse seemed to be intelligent and knowledgeable to all aspects of the world except for the more unpleasant ones. Whenever Al left the house, Edward would become paranoid about Alphonse being kidnapped, Alphonse being scammed and then being kidnapped, Alphonse being trampled to death by those crowds in the middle of the street... If Alphonse kept up his excursions, Edward, who had assumed the place of Al's older brother and therefore, his guardian, would be driven mad. Or rather, more insane than he was already; Edward confided in Alphonse and told him his story— of Alchemy, of the Homunculi and the Philosopher's Stone, and of Edward's world which contained another boy who looked just like Alphonse Heiderich and was Edward's little brother.

Alphonse simply looked at Edward as if he were, well, mad.

It nearly broke Edward, who was willing pour in all his trust to Alphonse Heiderich, to know that this Al probably didn't believe a word from his story and, in addition to that, thought he was mad of all things. But Edward forced himself to hang on anyway; for Alphonse's sake, of course, even if he didn't return those feelings— Edward couldn't bear to treat Alphonse Heiderich any less than he'd treat his Al, and soon after getting to know him Edward was already playing the role of being Al's older brothermuch to Alphonse's annoyance. Even if the Al on the other side of the Gate wasn't Alphonse Elric, he still had a connection with him, and Edward was struggling to be satisfied with just that one way relationship to hang on to in this unfamiliar world…

"Alpho—nse!" By this time, Edward was nearly overwhelmed with anxiety. Edward had already passed the stage in which he first noticed Alphonse was gone, searched futilely for him, and then came out of his state of denial that indeed, Alphonse really had run off. That was Phase One of part A. The panic and anxiety that came after that was Phase Two. Next he would be driven to hysteria and then probably, he would genuinelyturn mad due to his worry.

Running (or limping awkwardly along the streets at an impressive pace) and frantically pushing past pedestrians that seemed to enjoy stopping in the middle of the sidewalk just to hinder him, Ed happened to find his way into a street that was less congested by people with no other meaning in life other than to serve as an obstacle in his path. He found himself in a road that contained many alleys and began to make his way down the street.

"Dammit, where are you, Al!" He hastened his steps. What if Al was in danger? Al wouldn't be able to see a trap if the word "TRAP" was written all over it in bright neon colors that blind the eyes; and even if Al did become blind, that would not be the reason why he wouldn't comprehend the meaning of it.

"Al—pho—nse!" Edward called out once again, not really expecting a reply.

"He—re!" A voice called out nearby, almost right beside him.

Edward, who was still walking rapidly, nearly fell flat on his artificial limbs when he heard Alphonse's sudden response. He was thankful that he hadn't; it would have brought Edward a lot of pain if he had kneed himself with his own knee. He retraced his steps to find Alphonse in one of the alleyways, kneeling over something on the floor with his back to Edward.

"Al!" Memories of how Edward had done almost the exact same thing while searching for Alphonse back in Risembool flashed through his mind. Edward sighed, smiling with relief. Then his face hardened. The air was silent with dreaded anticipation. Then began Phase B:

"ALPHONSE!" he bellowed. "DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH TROUBLE YOU CAUSED ME TO SEARCH FOR YOU?" The two attracted strange looks from a few passersby who had begun to accumulate into one large mass, but dispersed quickly when Edward turned to glower at them. Edward then returned his focus on the taller boy. His voice was considerably softer. "Dammit, Al, you know how much it makes me worry when you run off like that!" Edward paused with his eyes on Al's crouched back, as if staring would help let the words sink in. "Al, didn't I tell you not to just disappear without telling me? What if…" a pause. "What if I lose you again?"

At this, Alphonse stood up suddenly with his back still facing away from Edward (and whatever it was he has looking at fell to the floor with a nasty thump and a hissing noise with a striking resemblance to those of a deflating balloon), and then he slightly turned his head long enough for him to give Edward a Look. Edward involuntarily took a sharp intake of breath. Such sudden changed of mood in Alphonse was rare and it took much to make Alphonse upset. Alphonse's voice, although quiet, cut through the air sharply.

"Why? Why do you worry about me so much?" His tone was gentle, but the coldness still seeped through his voice.

Edward was shaken and it took him a moment to reply. "Al…" he made out, dumbly. Now it was apparent that Al had taken the wheel. Edward laughed nervously, trying to break the tension. "It's because I care for you, of course! Why else—"

"Because I look like him, right? Is that the only reason why?"

Edward stopped moving altogether. What should he make of that statement?

"You care about me because I look like your brother. But what if I didn't look like him? Would you still care for me like you do now? Would you even bother to befriend me?"

Alphonse stood up slowly and turned to face Edward. His eyebrows were knitted together and his hands clenched into trembling fists. Al had his head lowered, effectively casting a shadow over his eyes, blocking them from Edward's view. When he spoke, his voice was even more quiet than usual.

"This face. It's all because of this face. Otherwise you wouldn't even be here."

Edward struggled to say something, anything—but he found that apparently his the muscles in his mouth had conveniently decided to take a nap and he only succeeded in making out something that was a cross between "Al" and a hoarse grunt. Ed had the sensation that his throat was constricted and would have liked to cough, but was unable to bring himself to break the silence.

Alphonse, too, seemed to be having trouble wording his thoughts. But when he did speak, Edward felt a wave of emotions crashing down on him. It hit him as hard as if he had just personally jumped over the Sierra Falls with a hangover and was suffering the consequences.

"You forget," Alphonse said, quite coldy, "that you have never 'lost' me before. Sorry, but I am not your younger brother. I just wish...that you would stop treating me like him and start treating me like Alphonse Heiderich."

Edward jerked his head upwards—he hadn't even noticed when his gaze had lowered guiltily in the first place. Alphonse's face carried a look of… what was it, bitterness? But why? He barely heard the whisper that followed.

"…Or does Alphonse Heiderich not even exist to you?"

Edward bit on his lip until he tasted blood. Damn it, Edward, you screwed up again. You've neglected his feelings to chase your own dreams. By the Gate, I should have realized what I was doing earlier! I hope Al doesn't hate me now…

For a moment the two locked gazes, shocking blue eyes staring pleadingly, resentfully, into Edward's. When the silence became too much, Alphonse lowered his head. Instantly he was filled with regret. He shouldn't have brought it up, shouldn't have told Edward what he really felt, shouldn't have jeopardized the relationship that Alphonse cherished so much—no matter how shaky it was— just because he, Alphonse, wanted a bit more…

Just then something clicked in Edward's mind. If Al was this upset over Ed's brotherly actions towards him, then Al must be taking those actions seriously. If so, then does that mean...? Urged on by this new realization, Edward's voice finally returned to him.

"Does that mean that… you believe me?"

Alphonse listened intently as if hope was something that could be heard. Maybe Edward's not offended...?

"You believed it when I told you my story… about Alchemy, and the Homunculi, and the other world... that I had a brother who looks like just you? You genuinely think that I'm not just insane?"

Alphonse stared at Edward before turning his head sideways to break the gaze, unable to look him in the face. "Yes, of course I believe you," he mumbled. "Otherwise… why would I be so bitter?" He was jealous, all right. He wanted Edward's attention, not as a younger brother, but as himself, for who he was.

I just wish that you would stop treating me like him and start treating me like Alphonse Heiderich.

Edward was left gaping awkwardly at Alphonse. Then, he took a deep breath and reached towards Alphonse with his good arm. Ed hesitated, recoiling a bit, and then began to walk forward. Alphonse braced himself as Ed approached—and stopped right next to him. Edward kneeled down on the cold cement and peeked inside a cardboard box that lay there conspicuously.

A kitten.

"So that's where all the missing food went," he mused out loud.

"Ah—I'm sorry!" Al stumbled as he hastily turned around and began to scratch the back of his head and began to ramble nervously, "It was raining earlier, and the kitten was shivering in the cold, so I just couldn't help it but—"

Ed said nothing but began petting the kitten, which began to purr contentedly (apparently it had forgiven Edward, as he was the one that caused Alphonse to drop the kitten earlier.) For a moment Alphonse was not sure how Edward would react to the missing food, the kitten, and to Al's previous behavior—but when Edward turned around to face Alphonse, he was carrying the kitten with his good arm and wearing a a wide grin on his face. Instantly Al felt all his doubts fade away and he began smiling too; Ed's smile was contagious like that.

"It's alright, Al. You know, that's something my brother would have done too, picking up stray cats regardless of whether they had rabies or not… But then again, as a suit of armor, he wouldn't really have to worry, now, would he?"

Alphonse looked at Edward for a moment, slightly bewildered. Edward never talked about his brother, with the exception of when he was explaining his story to him. Al's pursed lips relaxed into a wide smile. Perhaps by talking to him about Alphonse Elric, Edward was beginning to recognize Alphonse Heiderich as a different person than his brother...

Laughing, the two walked back to their house, the kitten meowing contentedly in their arms. Edward smiled at the sky. It was nice to see that the sun was shining again.

END