Nothing but Hate
Disclaimer:
Stephanie Meyer owns Twilight
Summary:
When all her life she had been shown nothing but hate, can one guy show her love? Or will Bella Swan push him away, afraid of being hurt? AH AU EXB OOC
A/N So I curse like hell through this so if you get offended easily don't read. I only use curse words when the characters are speaking but when they do – and especially in the case of Bella – they do swear quite a bit.
There was something about Bella Swan that kept people away. Maybe it was the dark, baggy clothing she chose to wear every day. Maybe it was the way she would glare at anyone who approached her. Maybe it was the way she never seemed to smile.
Bella never knew which one it was – or whether or not it was a combination of all. However, all that she knew was that she was glad that people kept their distance. She didn't want or need them pretending to befriend her and then laughing behind her back. She didn't need to put all of her trust in them and then have it thrown back in her face. She didn't need it.
So when Edward Masen approached her that sunny day at lunch, Bella Swan expected him to scurry away as she turned the force of her glare upon him.
But he didn't. He sat down next to her and asked her if she had a fag. She blanked him. He shrugged and pulled out a sandwich from his bag to begin eating. She glared. He ate. She frowned. He ate. She turned away and ignored him.
And that was the beginning
She knew all about Edward Masen of course. He was a new student and was immediately stemmed as 'the bad boy'. He always appeared to school in a leather jacket and baggy jeans with holes in them which Bella rolled her eyes to. She figured he was just too try- hard. He spent his time with himself, refusing to make friends.
He was very much like Bella actually, except for the fact that he spoke his mind. A week at the school and he had already been in two fights. He mouthed off to teachers when they pissed him off; refused the blatant attempts of the outgoing girls who flirted shamelessly with him and every other guy at the school, instead choosing to humiliate them by telling them they were 'whores who liked to fuck anything with a dick'.
"Fuck off"
Edward looked up and smirked. "So, she speaks then…" his voice held his humour and he looked at the brunette who was sitting next to him glaring.
"You've been sitting here for a week – and I'm sick of it. This spot is my place. So fuck off." Bella didn't beat around the bush. She told him clearly that she wanted him gone and away from her.
Of course, Edward Masen refused. Why would he listen? He liked it there and he would sit there.
"It doesn't have your name on it – I'm staying" And just like that he turned back to his food and carried on eating.
"I hate you"
"I love you too" Edward joked as he looked at Bella. He watched in confusion as her glare softened and her face fell before she quickly cleared her face of emotion and looked at him.
"Don't say that" she whispered. He stared at her shocked. She had to have known that he was just joking.
"I was only joking." But now his curiosity was getting the better of him. "But why shouldn't I say it?" His voice dropped, the conversation private.
She glared at the table for a few seconds before turning her hate filled gaze onto him. "Love is fucked."
And with that she walked away
Edward lay in his bed at night thinking over Bella Swan. She was so confusing and unlike the other girls at the school. She kept herself to herself and drew away from anyone else. And that's what attracted him to her. He liked the fact that she seemed to hate the world and everyone. He liked the fact that every day she would glare at him before resorting to ignoring him.
His mind pondered over the words that Bella had spoken
"Love is fucked."
He knew that something was going on with Bella. Something had to be to make her hate everything so much.
-----------
"So how are you enjoying school?" Edward looked over towards Esme Cullen his foster mother. She and her husband Carlisle decided to welcome him into their home and he moved in three weeks ago. He had to admit that out of all the places he had been forced to go, the Cullen's home was the one place where he actually liked it.
"It's good"
Esme nodded and placed a plate of baked beans and toast onto the table in front of Edward. "Emmett. Breakfast!" Esme called out
A few minutes later, Emmett Cullen bounded down the stairs. He was adopted by the Cullen's a few years ago after he too was fostered at first.
"So – Edward. Heard you got into a fight with that prick Newton" Emmett spoke as he tucked into his breakfast. Esme spun around and looked at Edward making him blush. He liked it here and didn't want to screw it up too badly that they'd refuse to adopt him. Emmett noticed Esme's shocked look and quickly defended Edward. "Don't worry mum – Newton was practically feeling up this girl in the hallway. And it was obvious she didn't want it – Edward saw it and beat the shit out of him. Good one" Emmett finished by smirking and holding his fist out towards Edward.
Edward bumped fists with Emmett before standing up and putting his plate in the dishwasher. "I'll try not to fight Esme – it's just that this prick tried to get his way with someone and it pissed me off…"
Esme nodded as she understood
"How about we play 20 questions?"
Bella stared at Edward as he looked at her, waiting for an answer to his question.
"Are you out of your fucking mind? I told you I hate you sitting here and then you start pissing me off even more by trying to talk to me!" Bella hissed.
"Oh come on. 20 questions - You ask whatever you want and then I ask whatever I want…" Edward smiled encouragingly as Bella continued to glare. Edward met her glare not relenting. A minute passed and they were both still staring at each other. Finally Bella spoke
"We ask the questions – but if it's too fucking personal we don't have to answer…" her voice was soft and rid of any emotion. She was simply stating a rule.
"Does the questions you don't answer count as one of the questions?"
"Yes"
Edward nodded. "So I'll start first – how long have you lived here?"
"Too fucking long" Edward sighed. She was going to be vague with her answers. "Who are you living with now?" Bella asked in return
"Carlisle and Esme Cullen. Do you know them?"
"Carlisle treats me sometimes. But no – other than that I don't. Why are you living with them?" Edward closed his eyes at her question. When he opened them again he saw victory in her eyes and it dawned on his what she was trying to do. She was trying to make him feel uncomfortable with her questions so that he would stop the game and leave her alone. Determination ran through him and he decided he would just have to answer her questions.
"I have nowhere else to go…"
"Why do you have nowhere else to go?" Bella persisted
"It's my turn to ask – what's with all the isolating?"
"I wouldn't expect you to understand."
"Is that your answer?"
"Yes. Now why do you have nowhere else to go?"
"I just don't."
"This is useless" Bella stated.
"How so?" Edward asked curiously.
"Look – we obviously aren't going to tell each other anything. I don't want to and you don't want to. And quite frankly, you're still pissing me off with all this questioning shit. So if you insist on sitting here can you at least keep your mouth shut?"
Edward sighed. He hadn't even asked her the main questions he wanted to. He thought that by easing her in she would open up more – obviously it didn't work.
"I hate you!"
"You piece of shit!"
"Why don't you fucking understand I hate you?"
"Get it in your fucking head – I hate you!"
"There never was love between us"
"Love didn't work"
"Love just leads to hate"
"It's better to hate than love – you can't get hurt then"
"Just hate everyone – it's what you're fucking best at"
"You remind me of her – and I hate you for it"
"I hate you for it"
"I hate you for it"
"I hate you"
"I hate you"
"I hate"
"Hate"
"Hate"
"Hate"
Bella woke up sweating and gasping for breath. Switching on her bedside lamp, she grabbed her i-pod that was lying on the bed side table and placed the headphones in her ears blaring up the music, effectively tuning out the voices haunting her.
She walked through the halls, her arms wrapped around her torso as she made her way out of the building and towards the bench underneath the shade of the tree over at the far end of the grounds.
He was there. He was always there. She tried to tell him to go away but he refused.
Edward Masen insisted on staying
Rolling her eyes as she saw him get out a sandwich from his backpack to eat, she stalked over to the bench
"How long are you planning on fucking staying here? Because if you haven't noticed over these past few weeks – I'm not one for company"
Edward just turned towards her, smiled and carried on taking a bite out of his sandwich. Bella hated it. She hated the fact that her harsh, hate filled words had no effect on him. Why didn't they? Why wasn't he affected by her hate?
And why couldn't she be like him? Why couldn't she not be affected by hate?
"She's such a freak. Seriously though – who walks around looking like that? She fucking depresses everyone as she walks around these school walls." Jessica Stanley's voice rang through the classroom whilst the teacher had still not arrived.
"I know right – she's not normal. I'm telling you – Bella Swan is probably gonna be committed to a nut centre soon. She's a fucking mental case" Lauren Mallory sniggered along as the group of girls burst into cackling laughter.
"The fucking freak of the town – she's a fucking disgrace" Another girl piped up as they broke out again into laughter
And Bella sat at the front of the room, her eyes focused on the book in her hand as she pulled desperately at her hood to block their voices.
But she couldn't.
So she sat there and listened to their spitefulness and kept her head down as the tears threatened to escape her eyes.
"Bitch – she'll fucking kill herself – and do us all a fucking favour."
She closed her eyes, blinking the water away and breathed deeply.
"Why do you do it?"
Edward looked up surprised as Bella spoke to him. This would be the first time that she initiated a conversation.
"Why do I do what?"
"Why do you get in all those fights, and have this bad boy image about you? People don't like you because of it. You could be just like everyone else if you dropped the image…"
"Who said anything about it being an image? I stand up for myself. I don't take shit. You should try it sometime…"
"Is that why you're like this?"
"Like what?"
"I don't know – so carefree. You seem like you ain't got shit to worry about. And I know you're being fostered so you must have some story – but you act like everything is so fucking perfect."
"I do?"
"You don't run away from me."
Now they were coming to the issue. "Do you want me to run away from you?" Edward asked, leaning a tad closer to Bella.
"Yes, no, I mean yes - I. I don't know. I want you to run away from me just like everyone else. But then I don't want you to run away because it's nice not having someone run away…" the last part was mumbled as if she was ashamed about her confession and Edward almost missed it.
Edward smiled and leaned over gently. He moved his hand across the bench and inched it slowly towards where her hand lay. She froze as she locked her eyes on him.
"Hey – I don't run away… ever." And as he whispered the words, her eyes widened as he placed his hand on top of hers and traced her palm with his knuckles before slipping her hand into his and squeezing gently.
And Edward Masen smiled as he knew.
Bella Swan was finally going to open up and let him in.
A/N This isn't going to be very long. Probably a three shot - or at least that's what I'm planning on right now. Although knowing me my mind will start to wander and you'll have a whole load more chapters.
I also want to say that there's a lot of things which are important in this chapter and hinted at in the next ones
Anyhow, please review and tell me what you thought - what you liked, what you didn't like, improvements, what you think etc.
XxxNicolexxX