"Rain."
Kind of set to the song of "Rain" by Breaking Benjamin. Pairing(s) -
Summary - "Rain, Rain, Go Away.. Come Again Another Day.. All the world is Waiting for the Sun." - And, sometimes he wonders "Why?" he just doesn't give up. He is reminded of "Why?" when he sees the colour petal pink. But, sometimes it fades.. "Just a little."
--Okay, so this idea has been bugging me for a while, except I could not really figure out what it should be about, and to say the most, I'm still not all that sure, but I feel like I must make this. It's been driving me crazy.
After listening to the song"Rain." by Breaking Benjamin (I love them..) I suppose you could say it helped me figure out quite a few things about this story, like the title, and kind of what it's kind of about.
Then I heard"It's Not Over." By Daughtry, and that helped to inspire me as well.
Certainly, not everything is figured out, and I can only hope I can make this as long as I envisioned it..I see this as quite a serious thing, and I'm hoping it'll earn me some recognition on I hope, atleast.
Anyway, here's chapter one, I hope you like it.
There is some serious angst in here, themes like suicide, but certainly I'll try not to make it too angsty. -Shrugs.- And, no, you're not really supposed to know how Gaara and Sakura got together. I couldn't think of anything.. stunning.. to explain it..
I am so sorry if Gaara is OOC! As well as for Sakura being OOC, I apologize.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------"My "My life with you means everything,
So I won't give up that easily..." - Daughtry, 'It's Not Over'.
-
"... Gaara?" Green eyes watch the redhaired boy carefully. "Are you alright..?"
How long had she been there? The young Kazekage couldn't really tell himself that certain answer to that certain question, but her voice snapped him out of that dangerous realm of thinking his thoughts so often fell into when he was alone. Alone.. that would could explain him quite well, he figured. Alone, all his life. Alone, no one who cared. Alone, feared and resented. Then again.. it had all changed, hadn't it? Well, not all, he'd admit, but surely quite a lot had changed.
Fifteen and Kazekage, who would have guessed the Ultimate Weapon of Sunagakure would have been the next Kazekage? Fifteen and already grown up..
"Gaara?"
Dull aqua blue orbs focused upon the pinkhaired kunoichi who seemed to tower over him, lips pulled downward into a worried frown, and vibrant green lights (that were commonly called eyes) shining down in concern upon his pale features. Her petal pink hair surrounded her face, seeming to only make her beautiful - 'No, stunning..' - features stand out more, seeming to give her eyes even more vibrant glow. God, how he loved her.. She was the light in his darkness, the hug he had always needed as a child, she was his sun when it rained.
'Rain, Rain, Go away, Come again another day.. All the world is waiting for the sun.'
Long ago, he would have thought love to be impossible, a fantasy only dreamed up by the weakhearted and the fools. Oh, how his younger self would be glaring at him, telling him how stupid he was, how foolish. He was the monster who loved only himself, the demon destined to be alone forever - to live and die alone. Had he never changed, he was sure he'd still be stalking the streets, killing those who simply looked at him in a manner he considered 'wrong'.
It was almost humorous, in a rather sick and twisted way. Who's to say that his humor had changed?
"Gaara?!"
Her tone had gotten more worried, more concerned, he noted as he stared lifelessly up at her, into those beautiful, mesmerizing green eyes of hers. Was she really that worried over him? He had almost found it impossible still to consider that anyone - her, even - cared for him. Maybe a part of his younger self had stuck with him..? Sure seemed that way about now. He wondered why he found it so hard to talk to her.. He was so damn tired, though..
His tired gaze shifted from her worried face to the large window that was behind him and his desk. 'Still in my office..' He thought, eyes narrowing slightly, noticing that it was clearly night outside. He could see the stars so clearly, the large, full moon shining through the window and illuminating his office along with the lights that were turned on. 'So, it's night.. How long have I been here?' He could have sworn last he checked while he was doing paperwork that it had been daylight.
His eyes then looked back upon Sakura who seemed now to be panicking a little. Was it so unlike him to ignore her? He wasn't sure anymore if he was ignoring her. Something felt so.. god awfully wrong.. His heart was hurting terribly, and he wondered briefly if it was hurting more than it had when Yashamaru had betrayed him. He almost wished that someone would just rip out his heart already - this pain was too much, and he didn't want to deal with it again..
He was snapped out of thoughts when he felt a warm, gentle, soft hand against his right cheek, and he blinked tiredly up at his love, who's lips seemed to moving, and he found himself allowing his head to lean upon her hand, suddenly craving her touch. Had she been talking to him the entire time? He wasn't sure, than again with Sakura he never really was.
He wasn't sure if all those kisses, those smiles, she gave him was nothing but a deceiving poison placed sweetly upon his lips and body. If all those hugs and sweet murmurs of the words that he had longed to hear since he was a child (that always managed to give him a strange, but good, feeling in his chest - that always managed to send a shiver down his spine when they had been spoken from the pinkhaired kunoichi) were nothing but bittersweet lies that were meant to lull him into a state of relaxation and trust before she would turn on him and...
"Gaara! You better answer me, damnit!" Sakura frowned, a look of pure concern in her eyes and facial expression. "Are you alright? What's wrong? I know you can hear me, what happened?" She was growing more frustrated, more worried by the second.
Oh, how she would kick his ass if he was playing around with her, though she doubted it, he wasn't usually the type to play around.
Yes, it seemed she was quite worried about him, the redhead decided, allowing himself to close his eyes for a few seconds, now trying to figure out why he felt so tired all of a sudden. 'I can only handle so much..' He thought, closing his eyes briefly. 'I've gone past my limit. I can't take it anymore..'
A small sigh slipped past his parted lips, and Sakura's eyes widened slightly.
'Chiyo.. I really wish you hadn't brought me back..' Such morbid thoughts, he wasn't sure where they were coming from, but he found himself suddenly wishing he had remained dead because something was just so terribly wrong with him now - he was broken. He found himself wondering if all that he had worked for, all that work to be recognized as Gaara and not as some monster or demon, was suddenly worth it..
Such morbid thoughts, he wasn't sure where they were coming from, but he found himself suddenly wishing he had remained dead because something was just so terribly wrong with him now - he was broken. He found himself wondering if all that he had worked for, all that work to be recognized as and not as some monster or demon, was suddenly worth it."It isn't, is it?" He found himself finally managing to speak. How odd he sounded, so tired, such a strained voice he hardly recognized it as his own.
"What?" Sakura was quite confused, though relieved when she saw that he could speak, though she would admit his voice sounded hoarse, strained, a little horrible.. "What isn't?"
The kunoichi had thought he might be in some sort of coma before he had answered, but it seemed she was wrong. She should have been relieved, but for some reason she found herself even more concerned with him. What was suddenly wrong with him? She couldn't figure it out, but she'd be damned if she let the only one she loved suffer like he seemed to be.
But, suffering from what? She couldn't figure it out. She was quite glad, though, that she had decided to stay awake and wait for her love to come home from his work at the Administration Building..
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"Where is he?" The medic frowned, stretching out slightly upon the large bed, green eyes landing upon a clock that sat upon a table beside the bed. "It's nine.."
She was worried, to say the least, but who was to blame her? She feared for his life as much - even more, perhaps - as she feared for Naruto's life. She knew the Shukaku had been extracted and that he wasn't in immediate danger from the Akatsuki.. She found herself fearing that the one known as Deidara would return and try to finish the redhead off, reclaim his 'trophy'. There was no way in hell she'd ever let that happen, but she still had her fears.
Brushing back a strand of her petal pink hair, she closed her eyes briefly before sitting up and looking around again. What if something had happened to him? It was a little past nine now, she realized as she quickly stood up, changing into her usual outfit instead of her night-gown. She then hurried out of the room, moving down the steps gracefully and quickly.
She slipped on her sandals before yanking the door open and hurrying out into the cold desert night. It still surprised her that it could get so cold at night when in the day it was almost unbearably hot in the day, but she was, more or less, adjusted to it now. She hurried through the streets, pausing once in a while to see if the Kazekage was anywhere near her. Soon, she entered the Administration Building, smiling wearily at the ANBU who stood at alert near the door before she continued onward.
Sakura muttered a quick "Hello." to the secretary before continuing on down the hall, moving past more Suna ANBU who lined the hallways, tense and alert, watching the medic with sharp eyes as she moved past them.
The pinkhaired kunoichi paused as her hand settled upon the doorknob that lead into the Kazekage's office. What if he was simply too busy to have bothered to send her an indication of his late arrival home? He had a rather bad temper when he was disturbed from doing his paperwork.
She was worried, though. Did that not serve as a good enough purpose to disturb him from his paperwork? He overworked himself sometimes, she knew, and she took it upon her to be the one to disturb him, make him relax, take a break once in a while. It wasn't healthy to always be working. Work caused stress, stress could cause emotional breakdowns. Suna needed their Kazekage, they depended upon him and their lives were in his hands.
Sighing softly to herself, she turned the knob and entered the room, closing the door behind her as she peered curiously at the redhead. He seemed to be sitting in his chair which was halfway turned toward the window that was behind his desk and that offered a stunning view of Suna - of his village. She could see his eyes were open, and he was breathing. He seemed perfectly fine.
She smiled slightly, moving closer, soon standing in front of him, one hand on her hip, other hanging limply at her side. The medic then met the redhead's gaze, and she arched a pink eyebrow at him. "You had me worried." She spoke, watching him closely.
No reply.
"Why didn't you tell me you'd be here this late?"
Silence.
"Damnit, Gaara." She had muttered, narrowing her eyes. "If someone made you mad, you don't have to take it out on me." A small pause, and she smiled rather seductively. "I didn't do anything, right?"
Nothing.
She immediately began to worry again, suddenly wondering if he had been poisoned, or perhaps was in some sort of comatose state. It wasn't like him to ignore her like this, now. Sure, he had ignored her quite a lot when she had first arrived here, but now.. After all that had happened, she felt like she was the only one to get a real, true, happy smile out of him. That she was the only one to have broken through the wall he had built around him, that now he seemed to feel comfortable enough around her to open up, express his emotions and feelings, his dreams and his problems now.
Sure, he opened up for his siblings, but... It seemed that he was more willing to open up to her on a deeper level now than he did with his siblings. A deeper level.. That meant more trust, more willingness to allow her to care for him, to love him, and for him to love her - for them to show their weaknesses around each other that were so carefully hidden before, though she still found he wasn't exactly comfortable being weak around anyone at all. She'd give him as much time as he needed to be able to trust her on that level.
This really wasn't like him, but he had been acting rather strange since about a month ago, she knew. She straightened her posture, waving a hand in front of his face, eyes narrowed still before she gently placed her hands upon his chest, a light, minty green chakra becoming visible as she seemed to be checking for any sort of poisons. She found nothing though, he was perfectly fine, except for being a bit dehydrated, but certainly nothing deathly, nothing to worry about. She worried anyway.
This really wasn't like him..
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Sakura snapped out of her thoughts, shaking her head just slightly, gazing down upon her boyfriend again, trying to make sense out of what he had meant by 'It isn't, is it?' question. It was wholly confusing, and in a way it didn't seem to make sense. Than again, Gaara was confusing. Everytime she thought she had figured him out, he'd do something and she'd be confused again, left wondering who he really was. She loved him, though, that much she knew about him. She loved him more than anything in the world, no matter how confusing he was.
But, perhaps this would only become their downfall.. Love.
She began to move her hand away from his cheek, ready to shake him gently to try and get some sort of response out of him, but moving her hand seemed to do the trick. Just as her hand was almost completely gone from his flesh, his arm jerked up and tightly grasped her wrist, dull aqua blue eyes suddenly seeming pleading, though somehow still seemed impassive - a look only Gaara could pull off.
"Gaara.." Sakura murmured, eyes seeming to soften. "What's wrong? Are you okay?"
The medic found herself a little more worried as she received no reply, and she felt a part of her motherly instinct kick in. The redhead almost looked like a sick child begging not to be left alone, and certainly she was not cold hearted enough to leave him because she was worried and she wanted to know what the hell was wrong with him.
As she had been about to ask him something, the question never got past her Dahlia lips as she watched blackened lids cover stunning, dull aqua colour eyes. The redhead's usually tense body seemed to relax now, facial expression seeming to fade into a sort of peaceful look, his chest that was covered by the Kazekage robes rising evenly with each breath he took.
This was only the second time - since Shukaku had been extracted from him - that he had allowed himself to sleep, she realized. Usually he'd always say something about how sleeping was a complete and utter waste of time.. 'Sleeping leads to vulnerability, and as Kazekage I cannot allow an opportunity to fall prey to assassins, or allow you or Suna to be harmed.' .. Yes, that was what he had said to her one day when she had grown rather concerned about his apparently non-existing sleeping habits.
She smiled slightly, sighing as she watched his grip upon her wrist slacken, and then his hand slid off of her wrist, landing softly upon his lower stomach, slack and relaxed, though there was the small, occasional twitch of his fingers as he now slept, and as she watched him in an odd fascination, she could sometimes see his lips moving, forming words, but no sound was issued from his pale lips as he seemed to speak in his dreams - though it only seemed to happen for a few seconds, than nothing, he was deathly still except for the calming rise and fall of his chest.
"You've been acting so.. strange, lately." Sakura found herself murmuring to his sleeping form. "Like something is really bothering you.. You can always tell me, you know." A small, sad smile graced her lips. "C'mon, we have to bring you home. It isn't safe for the great and mighty Godaime Kazekage to sleep in his chair, now is it?"
She quickly and gently slipped an arm around his waist, carefully placing his arm around her neck and with quick precision lifted him out of the chair. "Plus, it isn't that healthy, for your back, that is." She mumbled. She was a little surprised that he hadn't woken up, always having envisioned him as a light sleeper. 'Because he hasn't slept for so long..' She told herself, nodding slightly, also finding herself surprised at how light he seemed to be now a days.
'Aah, stress, maybe. He needs to relax more. I'll have to make him something special tomorrow, I'm not going to let him come back here until he's better.' She mused and began the long trudge out of the office, out of the building and back home, getting odd looks all round. She didn't care though, she was just pleased to see he remained sleeping, also quite happy to be able to have him to close.. He was so warm..
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'I don't know, Ino.. he's just been acting kind of weird. Withdrawn, I guess. I'm really worried. It's almost like he's blocking himself inside again, like he's trying to go back within that, well, 'wall' he had built around himself. Remember? I told you about that.. I don't know what to do.
I want to say something to him about it, but you know how he can get sometimes. A bad temper, but that's okay, I think I will bring it up anyway. I'll try not to worry about it for a while, I think maybe it's just some.. phase or something.. Who knows. You know how Gaara can get sometimes, but I love him none-the-less. I have been with him for quite some time.. You would think as a medical kunoichi I'd know what was going on..
I checked, though.. No traces of poison or anything, he was perfectly fine! Heart rate was normal, blood pressure good, nothing clogging any veins or anything. In great health. He really worried me tonight, though. He usually sends a scroll to alert me that he's staying at his office later than planned, but this time he didn't. So, I went to his office and found him. At first I had thought he was in a coma or something, he was so unresponsive. He was breathing, and his eyes followed me, but he was just..
He seemed almost lifeless, Ino. Like all his will to live had faded.. Maybe I'm just overreacting, but I'm really worried, now. Maybe he was just tired? Maybe. He fell asleep in his chair soon after I found him - that's the second time he's ever slept in his whole life, you know. He seemed so.. peaceful.. But, something bugged me. His.. expression.
I know I said he seemed peaceful, Ino, but he seemed troubled, too, in a way. I don't know how to describe it, but he seemed really bothered by something when he slept. I think he might talk in his sleep sometimes though by how his lips would move sometimes for a few seconds, forming unspoken words - I'm not sure what, though, he was saying. I really don't know. It's almost like.. a rainstorm in his life. Maybe a sandstorm would fit better though, ne?
I took him home after I found him. It's pretty late right now, maybe around five in the morning(I feel like such a hypocrite right now for always complaining at his pretty much non-existent sleeping habits when here I am staying up all night), he's still sleeping, right next to me as I write this. He still seems.. troubled, though, even though he seems peaceful on the outside. I just wish I could find the right words to describe it, Ino.
Well, I think I may have to go soon - make some breakfast for him. I'll let him sleep in as long as he wants, he's definitely not going to do his Kage duties today! I think he's sick, and sick people need rest, so here he will stay, whether he likes it or not. Sometimes he can be like a ungrateful little brat, but I love him with all my heart regardless, Ino.
You know how men can get sometimes. It's almost laughable when I think of some of the arguments we've had over the stupidest things. Yeah, I know you remember when I showed up crying. I still feel pretty foolish - weak - for crying over something as stupid as that. But, you should come over here sometime, maybe you can help me figure out what's wrong with Gaara? I don't want to lose him, but I just can't help but think it's like he's giving up on the inside because of what he had said when I finally got.. well, I guess a response out of him. "It isn't, is it?" He had said to me.
Well, I better end this now. The sun is starting to rise. The sunrises over here are really beautiful, Ino, you should see them. I hope you're doing alright. How's Naruto and everyone else? I miss you, keep in good health (remember! If you're going to pig out, it may as well be on healthy things!), and write back soon, you porker!
Truly,
Sakura Haruno.
----------------------------- x.X.x-------------------------------o.O.o----------------------------------------
"Rain"
Take a photograph,
It'll be the last,
Not a dollar or a crowd could ever keep me here..
I don't have a past...
I just have a chance.
Not a family or honest plea remains to say...
Rain, Rain, Go away,
Come again another day..
All the world is waiting for the sun.
Is it you I want...
Or just the notion..?
Of a heart to wrap around so I can find my way around?
Safe to say from here,
You're getting closer now..
We are never sad cause we are not allowed to be..
Rain, Rain, Go away,
Come again another day..
All the world is waiting for the sun.
Rain, Rain, Go away,
Come again another day..
All the world is waiting for the sun.
To lie here under you..
Is all that I could ever do.
To lie here under you is all...
To lie here under you is all that I could ever do.
To lie here under you is all...
Rain, Rain, Go away,
Come again another day..
All the world is waiting for the sun.
Rain, Rain, Go away,
Come again another day..
All the world is waiting for the sun..
All the world is waiting for the sun...
All the world is waiting for the sun.
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Okay, so this is chapter one. I really hope it's all in character, and hopefully I'll get a few reviews. Hopefully it's also long enough. I worked for quite some time on it, and I will admit I'm rather proud of how it has turned out. But, as always, it could be better.
I apologize for any errors found within this, please alert me if them if you want to and I'll go back and fix them, and please review. -Nods.- It would certainly mean a lot and help to motivate me to update faster, and try to make the chapters longer. Though, I am not on the computer as often as I use to be..
My teachers are killing me with homework and I'm having some rather troubling family issues, so yeah, I'll update as soon as possible. It also depends on reviews. -Nods.-
Oh yeah, ultimate record! 4,000 words or more! I'm quite proud. xD
Nny's Theory of Review-lution-
Reviews muq2
(Reviews me updating quicker x2)
Thankyou! Please review!
- Gaara-Sakura. 'Gaakura.