I know it's been a while, few months at least, since I've posted anything. Blame writer's block. But, I had a couple of ideas for one-shots and here we are. These are two separate one-shots, but are connected by a similar theme, so I paired them together. The first one is a bit of a weird thing for me to write. Not just because of some language used, but because of how I portray Jade. The second is a bit weird too. Again, not just because of the language, but how a character is shown.

Anyway, hope you enjoy, and I apologize for the long wait in anything of mine. After I finish these two, I'm going to work on a rewrite of my zombie apocalypse fic.

Disclaimer: I don't own 'VicTORious' or any characters. The two guys Jade meets, the couple, are based lightly off a friend's uncle and his boyfriend. I don't know their names, what they look like, etc, so I made them up as I worked on this.

No POV

"Can we go to the park?" Cat asks her group of friends during lunch, the last two classes in the afternoon canceled so Sikowitz can work on his new play, the usual gang opted out of auditioning.

"Why?" Tori asks, drinking her water.

"I want to go to the park." Cat answers simply. "Can we?" She asks, looking at everyone expectantly.

"Can't. Sikowitz asked me and Robbie to help with the play." Andre answers, silently glad that he was asked to work on the music and Robbie was asked to help with the set.

"I'm game." Beck says, shrugging his shoulders. "What about you two?" He asks his ex, who he recently has been able to relax around after their break up at Tori's house a few months ago, and the half-Latina.

"Sure. Why not?" Tori answers, shrugging. "It's either go to the park or deal with Trina for an extra couple of hours. Park wins." She shudders, remembering Trina's threat to practice her singing and acting on the ride home.

"Fuck it. Better than dealing with my new step-slut." Jade says, ignoring Cat's small whine at her swearing.

"Why do you keep calling her that?" Tori asks, raising an eyebrow at the Goth.

"She's four years older than me, wears less clothing than Trina at the beach, bigger tits than me, and has a tendency to lay on her back." Jade points out, raising an eyebrow back at Tori. "If you met her, you'd understand."

"So, what time are we going to the park?" Cat asks after a moment of uncomfortable silence between Tori and Jade.

"Right when classes let out. We can stop by my place and grab a volleyball or something." Tori suggests.

"I'll drive." Beck adds, ignoring the look from his ex.

A few hours later, Tori, Jade, Cat, and Beck find themselves at a park a few miles away from Hollywood Arts, Jade sitting in the shade as Cat and Tori play with the volleyball Tori brought and Beck gets drinks for the four of them.

"Hey, it's the fag family." Jade hears from behind her. Looking around, and never being one to like words that insult a person because of their sexuality, she spots two men walking down a path, holding hands, and a third following them, laughing and pointing at the apparent couple.

"Would you please stop calling us that?" One of the men, roughly six feet tall with short brown hair and clean shaven, an average build and somewhat deep voice, asks as he tries to ignore the man behind them.

"Why? It's what you are, isn't it? Two cock sucking…"

"Finish that sentence and you'll be speaking with a higher voice than my friend Cat." Jade cuts in, a small smirk when Cat, hearing her voice, says 'Hi!'.

"This doesn't concern you, Elvira." The homophobe says, eyeing Jade's breasts.

"Keep staring at my tits and I'll shove your own dick down your throat. Then who'll be the cock sucker?" Jade asks, smirk widening, as she makes her way over to the couple, waving to Tori and Beck to stay with Cat. "Sorry to interrupt your walk. Thought you'd like someone helping you." She tells the couple, ignoring the idiot behind them.

"We're fine." The man who spoke before says, giving Jade a soft smile. "You'd think we'd be used to close minded bigots like him, but there's no getting used to people like him."

"Could be worse." His boyfriend adds, a small smirk of his own when the idiot walks away, not liking how easily he's being ignored. "He could've caught us sixty-nining in the woods." He says, making Jade laugh.

"I like you." Jade tells the boyfriend, slightly taller than the first with dirty blonde hair in a close buzz, a two day old facial hair growth on his face. "Name's Jade." She says, shocking her friends, who she knows is watching them since Cat's 'hi' a moment ago, by holding her hand out to shake the others.

"Dale." The taller of the two says, shaking her hand. "And this is my boyfriend, Vince." He adds as Jade shakes Vince's hand.

An hour later, after a couples (of sorts) volleyball match between Dale and Vince against Tori and Jade, where the girls won, the actual couple bids the others farewell, Jade and Dale exchanging numbers and Vince dragging Dale away after asking Beck for a threesome, where Jade tried to entice Beck into joining, Tori and the others head back to Tori's place to meet with Andre and Robbie for the usual Friday poker night.

"Why did you give them my number?" Beck asks after parking at the Vega house and unlocking his seatbelt.

"What? You have a problem with two gay guys fucking each other in the ass?" Jade asks, strugging into the Vega house.

"No, but I'm not gay, and have no interest in joining them." Beck says, showing no real ill will towards Jade. "And what about you, you didn't seem to have a problem with them assuming you and Tori were a couple." He points out as they settle into the kitchen and Tori gets the cards, Andre and Robbie lost at the conversation.

"You didn't know Tori and I eat each other out in the janitor's closet?" Jade asks, pretending to be stunned.

And I'm ending here. This was originally going to be less humorous at the end, but I didn't want to keep it serious. And I doubt that one of them would joke about having sex in the park or asking another guy to join them for a threesome, though what do I know about them other than my friend's uncle's man is a huge Halloween lover (every October, he sets their house up with a theme, inside and out. This year's is 'witches, wizards, and mages') and they both seem like cool people.

Anyway, hope you liked this, and I apologize again for the four month delay. Wish I could say when I'd be working on some of my older stuff, but again, writer's block when I try to start them.

Thanks for reading. Hope you liked it and enjoy. The second will be out later this week.

Blessed Be.