It was torturous. Very tortuous. He wasn't in control of his body at all, his mind wasn't his and his thoughts and himself was pushed to the back of what used to be his own mind. He was a puppet, one on many strings. Helpless. He was unable to fight it, unable to scream his wraith and rage on the monstrosity that held him captive. All he could do was sit back and watch as he took CLU's orders, derezzed innocent Programs in and out of The Games. And the worst part of it all was that he would do it without hesitation or even a second thought of weather what he was doing was wrong or right. None the principles he once believed in was there anymore. He was a guard dog, CLU's best soldier and right hand man. It was a totally different game for him now.
He watched as the monster that was controlling him derezz another Program in The Games. One who had been sent there, innocent, scared, unable to grasp at hand that he was too fight to the death with the best fighter on The Grid. The crowd cheered his name, his new name. The one he dreaded the most. What happened to the almighty Tron? What happened to him against all reasons to derezz another Program without any good reasons to make him? Now...Now he was Rinzler. He was something he doesn't even know besides a monster, a savage, an abomination...Nothing about Tron ever existed in him anymore, except for one thing. The T logo on his chest was the only thing that was left to remain. He would never be able to face Alan-1, Flynn or anyone ever again. And he would continue to be CLU's slave...
Walking around the arena did anyone dare to challenge him? Nobody dared to come near him. Coward Programs is what Rinzler thought of them but Tron thought they were smart. Back away! Try to run! Go! I'll hold him off! Tron would say if Rinzler was a different Program and his opponent. If he ever had the chance, he would derezz Rinzler, not leaving any pixel left of his code to be rezzed back into the system. Ever. He would never want to let him hurt another Program ever again. Never. But it was impossible in order for him to do so for Rinzler is him and he has no way of controlling his body, else he'd destroy himself whenever he got the chance.
How would Flynn and Alan-1 see me like this? No, forget Flynn and Alan-1 for a moment, what...what would Yori think of me? If she were to see what I've done. I can never take it back, I wish I could. Why...WHY?! Dammit! Why can't I, why can't I just die, jump into the Sea of Simulation and drown into the Void?! It wasn't fair! Nobody deserves to die because of this, and nobody...nobody deserves to be repurposed for this reason...No...No...
No...