Session 9
WE ARE THE CHAMPIONS
By jak981125
Note: This story is part of a series. It will make more sense if you read the earlier sessions.
It was now December of 2072. The noon sun hovered over Manhattan. Lau was sitting at a diner with Faye. Faye was annoyed because New York was an extremely unfriendly environment for smokers. She couldn't have a cigarette with her coffee, and that was one of her greatest pleasures. Jet and Lau had quit. The two of them had made a bet to see who could go the longest without lighting up and both of them held out so long that after a while, they had kicked the habit completely. Not many people quit smoking by accident but I guess you could say that they did.
Ten months had passed since Lau, Faye, and Jet had fled from Mars. They had first settled down in Venus. Then after two months, the biggest news story in fifty years hit. The Earth was finally safe again. The meteors big enough not to disintegrate in Earth's atmosphere were blown into smaller chunks. Now how, pray-tell, did they pull that off? The answer was so laughably obvious, no one could believe they hadn't thought of it earlier. Some hackers on Earth were paid off by the government to hack into the spy satellites. The lasers on the satellites were fired at the meteors. It took a while, but after a few months, their goal had been accomplished. After fifty long years, scientists finally agreed that the planet of man's origin was safe enough to live on.
That knowledge wasn't enough to satisfy everyone. Some cities put in laser defense systems just in case a big enough rock did come their way. People who had lived on Venus flocked back to Earth for the more comfortable conditions. The Bebop crew had been among them. Bob had stayed on Venus. He was pulling in some good money as a bounty hunter there.
Now that Earth was unaltered, Applederry was out of a job. It turns out that Ed had been one of the hackers who helped target the meteors. Thus, in a manner of speaking, she cost her father his job. He and Ed had paid a brief visit to the Bebop. You couldn't have pried the smile off of Jet's face with a crowbar despite his loathing for Applederry. Nothing Jet and Faye had told Lau about Ed could have prepared him for meeting her. But one thing was clear, he had liked her a lot. For the first time he realized why Jet had been so sad at the departure of this young girl. Ed and her father were going to be doing some cartography work on Venus. Ed was as happy and silly as ever, but Faye could swear she seemed tired. After all, she had been getting dragged all over the place for quite some time, first on the Bebop, and then with her father. Faye still figured she was better off with her dad. After all, Faye had lost the opportunity to be with her own family. She didn't want Ed to miss out on that.
Faye and Lau's relationship had become quite serious. There were some serious issues for all of them to consider now. First of all, was their current situation acceptable? The Bebop crew had been hired by a small bounty hunting firm called Manhattan Fugitive Recovery (or MFR for short). They spent most of their time hunting small-time fugitives in the Bronx and Manhattan. It was the first time any of them hadn't worked freelance. It meant some changes. It was a more nine to five type of job and meant following more regulations than before. They couldn't just go knocking someone's teeth out anymore while making a bust. It also meant a salary and commission, but no bounty. It was more stable, not to mention government subsidized, but the job had lost some of its thrill. None of them wanted to admit it, but they had enjoyed the sense of danger, going after the big game on Mars.
Anyway, getting back to the diner, Jet walked up and joined them after a while. He had some news for them. "Sorry I'm late but I was on the phone with Bob for a while. You're never going to believe what he told me."
"After meeting Ed, I would believe anything," replied Lau.
"Stagler is announcing a bounty hunting contest for the moons of Jupiter and Saturn," said Jet. Marvin Stagler was the new head of ISSP. He had been a major reformer and weeded out a lot of corruption and incompetence. They still had a lot of trouble with the syndicates, though. Stagler was also determined to bring down the huge crime rate on those moons. "The competition is for teams of five," said Jet. "Every wulong worth of bounty you catch on one of the moons gets you one point. The team with the most points wins an extra fifty million per person."
"Wow, that's going to make Stagler real popular with the Mars underworld," replied Faye. "They sell about half of their drugs on those moons."
Lau stared hard at Jet. "You didn't just tell us this to give us today's news bulletin, did you Jet?" he asked.
"Hey come on, we're just as good as any other cowboys out there. We could win this thing!" replied Jet. "Besides, aren't you sick of this small time stuff? Don't you want to go after the big boys again?"
"Yes, but I also like knowing where my next meal is coming from," Lau replied. "I have to think about the future here. If we do this, we'll have to quit MFR. Leaving that stable work behind is one frightening prospect. Wait a minute, weren't you the one who told me you would never take me back there no matter what?"
"Well...I said I wouldn't take you back to Mars," replied Jet. "Technically we're not going there.
"Lau, would this reluctance of yours have anything to do with the Red Dragons?" asked Faye.
Lau paused for a moment and then nodded. "I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared of running into them again. About the most I can say is that they MIGHT leave me alone if I stay away from them. But if we arrested even one member of theirs, that would be suicide."
Eventually their lunch hour was over and the three of them had to head out to Brooklyn to arrest a fraudulent accountant. But the issue was far from over. Jet made sure to bring it up again as soon as they returned to the harbor, where the Bebop was docked.
"We might not have to quit. We could take a leave of absence and if things don't work out, we can always go back to MFR," said Jet.
"After only eight months with the company? Yeah, they're going to love that," replied Lau. "Besides, this contest is for teams of five and I count three of us."
"I already talked it over with Bob and he said he'd join us and I know my old buddy Fatty would too if we asked him," replied Jet.
Faye felt that Lau was trying to avoid the subject, but kept her mouth shut. Had that been anyone but Lau, she certainly would have had a thing or two to say. But Lau noticed her silence and her attempts to avoid eye contact.
"OK Faye, I know you have an opinion here. Do you think we should do this?"
After a short pause, Faye nodded. "I'm sorry Lau, but I'm with Jet on this one. But if you don't want to..."
"No, no, let's just do this," interrupted Lau. "You know me better than anyone including my own mother. I trust your judgment. Besides, maybe this contest is God's way of telling me I have to face my demons."
Faye came over and hugged Lau. "You're going to make a great husband someday. You know why?"
"Why's that?"
"Because you know how to give in to your woman," she grinned.
MFR was more than willing to give leaves of absences. They told Jet that many of their employees quit and came back more than three times in their career. Fatty was also more than willing to join up with the Bebop crew. The first people who had tried to recruit him were known for being dishonest.
As the contest date approached, Lau trained compulsively. He had been deprived of his Lueger and spent hours of target practice each week getting used to the Glock that Damien had given him. He practiced aikido and kendo for two hours a day. It wasn't just the syndicate that had him worried. Every criminal on Ganymede, Europa, Callisto, Io, and Titan would be expecting them. They were all probably preparing for the onslaught of cowboys that would be arriving. Jet had the entire Bebop inspected. It had not been into space since they had arrived on Earth eight months ago.
Bob and Fatty arrived at JFK Airport to meet up with them two days before the contest. Jet, Bob, and Fatty spent hours discussing targets and strategy. These were conversations that Lau and Faye were mostly left out of. They kept themselves busy hanging out together in Greenwich Village. The two of them pledged to put itching powder in Jet's boxers later on to get back at him for leaving them out. Finally the big day came and they were all on their way to Titan. What follows is merely a brief summary of their experience in the contest. If I told you everything that happened you would be reading for quite some time.
Jet figured Titan would be a good place to start. The red eye trade was a major business there. He didn't say anything to Bob or Fatty, but he also took into consideration the fact that the Red Dragons hadn't done any business there since Vicious fought in the war. Titan was also an unpopular choice among the other bounty hunters because of the climate. More than half the moon was a desert. It would be unpleasant there and it would be tougher to track bounty with fewer cities around. But Jet and Fatty were experienced cowboys who knew how to get their hands on hard-to-find bounty. Fatty was also a computer whiz, which helped compensate for Edward's absence.
The Bebop had to land in Tharimar, the moon's biggest city. The engines would have been ruined by the sand. Their first stop was one of the oddest experiences any of them had ever had. The location was New Atlantis. If the title doesn't give it away, New Atlantis was a unique city located under water in Titan's only sea. The big glass bubble that housed the city reminded Lau of the San Francisco domes (which were now scheduled for demolition). It upset him to think that after all his father had suffered building those things, they were going to be destroyed.
Jet smiled as he looked up their first target in the area. This one should sound familiar. It was none other than our good friend Abdul Hakim himself. Only Jet, Spike, and Ein would have remembered the tall pet thief from Mars. In fact, catching Hakim was another huge factor in Jet choosing Titan. He remembered how frustrated Spike had been not catching him. Hakim had been released from prison on parole. He wasted no time violating his parole by robbing a bank on Tharsis. Bank robbery was not his usual routine. One could only suspect he had pulled the bank heist to fund whatever he was going to do next.The bounty was eight million.
The difficulty in catching Hakim this time around was that they had no insider tips on what he now looked like. Hakim changed his face as often as most people change their underwear. Using Spike's old sunglasses that had a facial analyzer built in, Lau started a day-long search for young men who were tall and lanky who liked to hang around pet shops.
Bounty hunting is a business that requires a lot of patience. It means spending hours, sometimes days, looking for the right guy. Faye, having no patience at all and feeling unneeded, managed to locate one of the more unique forms of gambling on Titan: pig racing. No one saw her for hours.
Every time a guy matching Hakim's description came by, Lau would use the glasses to scan their face. An analysis would compare Hakim's original face to the one Lau was looking at. Hours went by and Lau saw thirteen guys who turned out to be someone else. It wasn't all a waste. One of the guys he scanned turned out to be a car thief with a half-million bounty. Not wanting to blow his cover, Lau radioed the information to Fatty, who caught the guy a few blocks away.
Just as Lau was ready to pack up and go back, a message came over the communicator. It was Bob. "He's heading west! His face has not changed, repeat, his face has not changed!"
Bob had recognized Hakim and tried to nab him all by himself. However, Hakim was bigger and tougher. He gave Bob a beating and ran for it. Fatty, Jet, and Lau all mobilized, but Lau was the closest to him. He had seen Hakim's original face, but not the one he had when he ran into Spike. After a minute, a tall and lanky guy with a goatee and an afro came strolling down the street with a grin. He was feeling real cocky after having disposed of that pesky little bounty hunter. The glasses confirmed his identity. Lau strolled up to him casually as if to start a conversation. Unfortunately, Hakim could spot a cop or a cowboy from a mile away and started running. Lau was certainly glad he had quit smoking. He chased after Hakim. Hakim headed for a bridge leading to a transport center. The center had submarines that took people to and from the surface.
About then Hakim made a mistake. He realized he didn't have enough of a lead on Lau to board one of the subs and decided to fight. After all, this guy didn't look so tough. Indeed Hakim was an unusually good fighter. Lau, however, turned out to be more than a match for him. After going at it for just a few moments, Hakim realized his mistake and tried to run for it again. This time his escape was cut off by a taxi. Faye emerged from the back with a drawn gun. One look at her face told Hakim that he'd better not mess with her. She had lost big time at the pig races. The Bebop made eight million for his capture. That put them in second place at the end of the first day of competition. The first place team made fifteen million. Fatty was tracking everything the other teams were doing with the computer, so he knew all about it.
Day two turned out to be unlucky. The hacker they were chasing drew a gun and Jet had to shoot him. He died at the hospital. The team in first place made another fifteen million that day. Only one other team made any cash that day. Sadly, one of the teams lost a member. He was shot to death by a drug dealer on Callisto. The bounty on this dealer was raised to eighteen million but he had disappeared. It was a bad day for the bounty hunting business.
Jet promised everyone that day three would be their last in New Atlantis. Fatty and Bob were hoping it would be their last day on Titan, period. But Jet insisted that Titan was by far the best place to work. He was right. Jet had compromised and they agreed to leave New Atlantis right away and hunt on the surface for one day. The Bebop team took the lead by catching an entire team of gold smugglers in the desert who were disguised as nomads. It was Faye who had spotted them. She couldn't help but notice that desert nomads don't typically wear designer jeans under their robes. The one bad thing about that day was when Faye wondered out loud if camels really do spit and within moments got her answer. Lau made the mistake of laughing at her and nearly had his hair ripped out by Faye.
That night, while Faye tried to wash the camel spit out of her hair (not an easy task, I assure you), Fatty pulled Jet aside. "Hey, take a look at this," he said, pointing to the computer. "All of the other teams are scheduled to leave Ganymede tomorrow. Jet, I'll bet you that as soon as they leave, every crook on Ganymede is going to breathe a sigh of relief and let his guard down."
"Yeah, but don't you think Ganymede's been pretty well picked clean by now?" asked Jet.
"Not a chance," replied Fatty. "The higher profile bounties that weren't caught may very well come out of the woodwork as soon as the others leave."
Jet took a look over at Lau who was sleeping on the couch. "I don't know," he replied. "That's pretty deep into the heart of syndicate country. Lau over there isn't exactly real popular with them."
"Jet, if we tip-toe our way around this, we'll lose the lead for sure," replied Fatty. "If your friend is that unpopular with the syndicates, then he can stay on the Bebop. The rest of us want to win."
"He's right, Jet," replied Bob. "Why did we come here if we didn't come to win?"
"OK, fine, we'll go," replied Jet. "But we're not leaving Lau on the ship. It might actually be safer for him if he went out with the rest of us."
Early the next morning, the Bebop left Titan and headed towards Jupiter. They had planned to touch down that day but something happened that prevented them. Fatty was sitting down to eat his favorite breakfast: a huge portion of powdered donuts and blueberry pie. Lau and Faye lost their appetites just watching him. Though they were disgusted, they couldn't look away for some reason. It was like watching a train wreck. Fatty noticed he was being watched. "What? What is it? Quit staring at me like that, you're freaking me out."
Lau and Faye said nothing but they both silently wondered just how many weirdoes Jet knew. Just then, the whole ship shook and alarms went off all over the place. Fatty choked on his food. Believe me, it's not easy giving the Heimlich to a guy as big as Fatty.
Jet ran in with a towel around his waist. He had been showering. "Lau, Faye, battle stations! We have company!" he yelled. And indeed they did. Several small vessels and one big cruiser were attacking the Bebop.
"It's the syndicate!" thought Lau to himself. "These people are going to get hurt because of me. I never should have come with." Lau was wrong. It wasn't the syndicate. It was some pirates. Space piracy was pretty common in that region.
I won't bore you with the details of the fight. It wasn't real exciting. The Bebop sustained only minor damage and Lau and Faye were more than victorious over the smaller ships. The large cruiser didn't try to run away until every single one of the smaller crafts had been destroyed. That was a mistake. The Bebop gave chase immediately. Then came mistake number two. The larger ship ran out of fuel. Jet couldn't help but grin and he pulled the Bebop up alongside the pirate ship and boarded. These must have been the dumbest and least skilled pirates of all time. They didn't get to Ganymede until well after three in the morning but it had been worth it. They picked up another ten million by turning in the pirates. Another bonus was that since the Bebop had arrived so late at night, no one had seen them arrive.
Lau awoke the next morning to the sound of glass breaking. As he stepped out of his bedroom he saw Faye storming angrily towards him. "It didn't count!" she yelled.
"What didn't count?" asked Lau who was still half-asleep.
"Those pirates we caught," replied Faye. "Since we caught them in space instead of on one of the moons, those bastards at ISSP won't count the ten million we collected on them towards the contest. We're in third place now!"
Ganymede is usually a hotbed of criminal activity. The whole moon was one big black market surrounded by water. But when the other bounty hunters had been there, the place had never been so quiet. Now that they were gone, it was business as usual. Lau, Faye, and Bob didn't even bother checking the database that day. They were feeling more than a wee bit impatient after the pirate thing. They just walked into a crowded marketplace and started rounding up everyone who was doing something illegal. Then they put them together in a sort of chain gang and marched them through the crowded streets straight over to ISSP headquarters. It did wonders for cheering up Faye. ISSP told them it would take some time to process all the people they had caught. They left without having any idea what they would end up collecting.
Jet and Fatty had a different sort of plan. They ignored the black market entirely and went after a prominent loan shark. They waited for his car to leave his office and when they saw it coming, Fatty threw himself in front of it. The loan shark hit the brakes. Of course he hadn't even touched him but Fatty pretended he's been hit. He put on quite a performance. "Oh, I've been hit! I'm done for! Who will provide for my wife and family?" The loan shark stood over Fatty. "Oh, mister, if I die, will you please give a message to my family for me?" croaked Fatty. The loan shark leaned over to hear the message. "Gotcha!" whispered Fatty into his ear.
Jet came up from behind and tackled the guy. "Don't struggle, or I'll have Fatty over here sit on you!" warned Jet.
They took him over to the ISSP where they were still busy sorting out all of the people that Lau, Bob, and Faye had brought in. Donnelly gave Jet a dirty look as they brought yet another prisoner for processing. This guy was worth nine million. The last day of competition was tomorrow so Jet was unsympathetic to the busy police officers.
That night, they watched news coverage of a major bust on Callisto. One of the other teams had nabbed a syndicate kingpin. They were now in the lead. Without the results of what the Bebop team had caught in the market, they had fallen to last place.
"This isn't fun at all," complained Faye. "It feels all wrong rushing through this whole thing just so we can stay ahead of the pack."
"Well you can console yourself with all that prize money, little lady," replied Fatty.
"That's only if those guys we caught were worth anything," added Lau.
Jet noticed that Bob had walked away. He looked around for a while and finally found him in a storage locker.
"What are you doing in here Bob?" asked Jet. "You're missing all the fun of hearing Faye complain, and believe me, she makes an art form out of complaining." Bob didn't laugh. Jet sighed and sat down next to him. "Still thinking about Tim?" he asked. Bob nodded.
"It just seems like a bad dream, Jet," he said. "I just can't picture a twelve year old boy going through all that effort just to get back at his father. He still won't tell me what I did wrong."
"How's he doing?" asked Jet.
"He got placed in a psychiatric hospital," replied Bob. "The nurses there coddle him so much and treat him like he's the victim and me like I'm the bad guy. I don't get it."
Jet patted Bob on the shoulder. "You're no villain Bob. What happened wasn't your fault and it might not be his fault either. Some people are just mentally ill. No one means for it to happen."
Bob looked over at Jet. "How about you? I haven't asked you how you're doing after losing Spike."
"I'm still taking it day by day and I have been for more than a year now," replied Jet. "It still hurts, no question." Jet didn't feel particularly obligated to say anything about Ed.
"Jet, we got him!" yelled Lau from down the hall.
"Got who?" replied Jet.
"That guy that shot that bounty hunter," replied Lau. "ISSP just called and apparently he was one of the people we rounded up today. We're in first place."
Everyone was ecstatic over the news that night but the final day of the contest turned up nothing. They didn't catch a single bounty. Their mass arrest the day before had drawn too much attention and there wasn't enough time to try another moon. They could only hope the other teams were having bad luck as well. That evening, everyone sat around the TV for the 11:30 news.
"...and in other news, as the bounty hunting contest draws to a close there is a narrow margin between first and second place. Team Callisto leads Team Bebop by a mere forty wulongs with only minutes left. It seems safe to say that Team Callisto is the winner." Everyone groaned in agony after hearing that news. After everything they had been through it didn't seem possible that they could lose it all now.
Suddenly Lau had an idea. He grabbed Faye by the arm. "Come on, we can still win this thing," he said.
"Forget it kid," replied Fatty. "Whatever you have in mind won't work. If you left this very second you would barely have enough time to make it to the nearest police station, much less locate, catch, and turn in a bounty head."
Lau ignored him. "Come on Faye, I'm telling you we still have one more chance. I'll explain on the way." He practically dragged her to the hangar.
One hour later, Faye returned alone. She walked in, smiled and shook her head like she couldn't believe it (and she couldn't). "Well, we won," she said.
"What?!" yelled Jet. "But how? You couldn't possibly have had enough time. Who did you bring in?"
"Lau," replied Faye. "Lau had a five hundred bounty on him for failure to appear in court after a bar fight on Venus a couple years ago. The silly fool made me turn him in. According to the rules, it counts. We won."
They all had a good laugh over that one. All of them except Lau. The police couldn't even put him in a holding cell for fear that one of the people he had arrested would kill him. He had to be locked in an interrogation room all night long. So while his teammates were breaking out the champagne, he was trying to get to sleep on a cold tile floor. But he couldn't help thinking to himself that it was worth it.
The next day he went to court and the judge slapped him with a three million fine but he was free to go. With the prize money in hand, he felt like he was on top of the world. They could finally pay off Faye's long-term debts (the hospital bill and those debts she had been conned into accepting were waived by the court months ago). Now Lau and Faye were both completely free with no debts, no price on their heads and some money to spare.
Fatty and Bob headed home the next day. Fatty was considering taking his fifty million and opening up his own pie shop. Jet couldn't help but laugh at an image of Fatty going out of business after eating his entire inventory. As for Bob, he planned to keep working. He decided to take Jet's advice and keep busy so he could cope better with his situation.
After Bob and Fatty left, Lau, Faye and Jet had a chance to sit back and discuss the future. "So what now Jet? Do we keep working? Do we go back to Earth or stay on Mars?" asked Lau.
"It feels so weird," said Jet. "I have never in my whole life had so much money that I could choose whether or not to work. I say we hang around here for a while and keep working the way we used to. If nothing else, it'll keep us occupied and keep society a little safer."
Faye grinned at him. "Jet Black, you could have all the money in the world and you would just keep working, wouldn't you? Face it, this line of work is in your blood. Are you ever even going to spend that money?"
Jet thought for a minute. "You know, I could start looking for an investment to use that cash on. No pie shops though. How about you two?"
"Maybe I could buy a condo somewhere," replied Lau. "But I've already spent some of my money."
"Oh you did, did you?" replied Faye. "And on what, pray-tell, have you squandered away your hard earned cash for which you spent time in jail?"
Lau smiled. Very slowly he pulled a small velvet box out of his pocket and opened it. It contained a diamond ring. He got down on one knee. "Faye will you marry me?"
Faye was so stunned that she couldn't speak. She just covered her mouth with her hands and nodded as tears rolled down her face. Jet smiled and walked out of the room to give them some time alone. He looked out a window at the night sky. "Well Spike, I bet you thought neither one of us would ever see THAT happen. Hey...why am I so itchy?"
MAZEL TOV, SPACE COWBOY
(c) 2004 Joseph Kerner
jak981125@catholic.org
Disclaimer: I did not create Cowboy Bebop. I wish I had, but I didn't. This is just fanfiction
WE ARE THE CHAMPIONS
By jak981125
Note: This story is part of a series. It will make more sense if you read the earlier sessions.
It was now December of 2072. The noon sun hovered over Manhattan. Lau was sitting at a diner with Faye. Faye was annoyed because New York was an extremely unfriendly environment for smokers. She couldn't have a cigarette with her coffee, and that was one of her greatest pleasures. Jet and Lau had quit. The two of them had made a bet to see who could go the longest without lighting up and both of them held out so long that after a while, they had kicked the habit completely. Not many people quit smoking by accident but I guess you could say that they did.
Ten months had passed since Lau, Faye, and Jet had fled from Mars. They had first settled down in Venus. Then after two months, the biggest news story in fifty years hit. The Earth was finally safe again. The meteors big enough not to disintegrate in Earth's atmosphere were blown into smaller chunks. Now how, pray-tell, did they pull that off? The answer was so laughably obvious, no one could believe they hadn't thought of it earlier. Some hackers on Earth were paid off by the government to hack into the spy satellites. The lasers on the satellites were fired at the meteors. It took a while, but after a few months, their goal had been accomplished. After fifty long years, scientists finally agreed that the planet of man's origin was safe enough to live on.
That knowledge wasn't enough to satisfy everyone. Some cities put in laser defense systems just in case a big enough rock did come their way. People who had lived on Venus flocked back to Earth for the more comfortable conditions. The Bebop crew had been among them. Bob had stayed on Venus. He was pulling in some good money as a bounty hunter there.
Now that Earth was unaltered, Applederry was out of a job. It turns out that Ed had been one of the hackers who helped target the meteors. Thus, in a manner of speaking, she cost her father his job. He and Ed had paid a brief visit to the Bebop. You couldn't have pried the smile off of Jet's face with a crowbar despite his loathing for Applederry. Nothing Jet and Faye had told Lau about Ed could have prepared him for meeting her. But one thing was clear, he had liked her a lot. For the first time he realized why Jet had been so sad at the departure of this young girl. Ed and her father were going to be doing some cartography work on Venus. Ed was as happy and silly as ever, but Faye could swear she seemed tired. After all, she had been getting dragged all over the place for quite some time, first on the Bebop, and then with her father. Faye still figured she was better off with her dad. After all, Faye had lost the opportunity to be with her own family. She didn't want Ed to miss out on that.
Faye and Lau's relationship had become quite serious. There were some serious issues for all of them to consider now. First of all, was their current situation acceptable? The Bebop crew had been hired by a small bounty hunting firm called Manhattan Fugitive Recovery (or MFR for short). They spent most of their time hunting small-time fugitives in the Bronx and Manhattan. It was the first time any of them hadn't worked freelance. It meant some changes. It was a more nine to five type of job and meant following more regulations than before. They couldn't just go knocking someone's teeth out anymore while making a bust. It also meant a salary and commission, but no bounty. It was more stable, not to mention government subsidized, but the job had lost some of its thrill. None of them wanted to admit it, but they had enjoyed the sense of danger, going after the big game on Mars.
Anyway, getting back to the diner, Jet walked up and joined them after a while. He had some news for them. "Sorry I'm late but I was on the phone with Bob for a while. You're never going to believe what he told me."
"After meeting Ed, I would believe anything," replied Lau.
"Stagler is announcing a bounty hunting contest for the moons of Jupiter and Saturn," said Jet. Marvin Stagler was the new head of ISSP. He had been a major reformer and weeded out a lot of corruption and incompetence. They still had a lot of trouble with the syndicates, though. Stagler was also determined to bring down the huge crime rate on those moons. "The competition is for teams of five," said Jet. "Every wulong worth of bounty you catch on one of the moons gets you one point. The team with the most points wins an extra fifty million per person."
"Wow, that's going to make Stagler real popular with the Mars underworld," replied Faye. "They sell about half of their drugs on those moons."
Lau stared hard at Jet. "You didn't just tell us this to give us today's news bulletin, did you Jet?" he asked.
"Hey come on, we're just as good as any other cowboys out there. We could win this thing!" replied Jet. "Besides, aren't you sick of this small time stuff? Don't you want to go after the big boys again?"
"Yes, but I also like knowing where my next meal is coming from," Lau replied. "I have to think about the future here. If we do this, we'll have to quit MFR. Leaving that stable work behind is one frightening prospect. Wait a minute, weren't you the one who told me you would never take me back there no matter what?"
"Well...I said I wouldn't take you back to Mars," replied Jet. "Technically we're not going there.
"Lau, would this reluctance of yours have anything to do with the Red Dragons?" asked Faye.
Lau paused for a moment and then nodded. "I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared of running into them again. About the most I can say is that they MIGHT leave me alone if I stay away from them. But if we arrested even one member of theirs, that would be suicide."
Eventually their lunch hour was over and the three of them had to head out to Brooklyn to arrest a fraudulent accountant. But the issue was far from over. Jet made sure to bring it up again as soon as they returned to the harbor, where the Bebop was docked.
"We might not have to quit. We could take a leave of absence and if things don't work out, we can always go back to MFR," said Jet.
"After only eight months with the company? Yeah, they're going to love that," replied Lau. "Besides, this contest is for teams of five and I count three of us."
"I already talked it over with Bob and he said he'd join us and I know my old buddy Fatty would too if we asked him," replied Jet.
Faye felt that Lau was trying to avoid the subject, but kept her mouth shut. Had that been anyone but Lau, she certainly would have had a thing or two to say. But Lau noticed her silence and her attempts to avoid eye contact.
"OK Faye, I know you have an opinion here. Do you think we should do this?"
After a short pause, Faye nodded. "I'm sorry Lau, but I'm with Jet on this one. But if you don't want to..."
"No, no, let's just do this," interrupted Lau. "You know me better than anyone including my own mother. I trust your judgment. Besides, maybe this contest is God's way of telling me I have to face my demons."
Faye came over and hugged Lau. "You're going to make a great husband someday. You know why?"
"Why's that?"
"Because you know how to give in to your woman," she grinned.
MFR was more than willing to give leaves of absences. They told Jet that many of their employees quit and came back more than three times in their career. Fatty was also more than willing to join up with the Bebop crew. The first people who had tried to recruit him were known for being dishonest.
As the contest date approached, Lau trained compulsively. He had been deprived of his Lueger and spent hours of target practice each week getting used to the Glock that Damien had given him. He practiced aikido and kendo for two hours a day. It wasn't just the syndicate that had him worried. Every criminal on Ganymede, Europa, Callisto, Io, and Titan would be expecting them. They were all probably preparing for the onslaught of cowboys that would be arriving. Jet had the entire Bebop inspected. It had not been into space since they had arrived on Earth eight months ago.
Bob and Fatty arrived at JFK Airport to meet up with them two days before the contest. Jet, Bob, and Fatty spent hours discussing targets and strategy. These were conversations that Lau and Faye were mostly left out of. They kept themselves busy hanging out together in Greenwich Village. The two of them pledged to put itching powder in Jet's boxers later on to get back at him for leaving them out. Finally the big day came and they were all on their way to Titan. What follows is merely a brief summary of their experience in the contest. If I told you everything that happened you would be reading for quite some time.
Jet figured Titan would be a good place to start. The red eye trade was a major business there. He didn't say anything to Bob or Fatty, but he also took into consideration the fact that the Red Dragons hadn't done any business there since Vicious fought in the war. Titan was also an unpopular choice among the other bounty hunters because of the climate. More than half the moon was a desert. It would be unpleasant there and it would be tougher to track bounty with fewer cities around. But Jet and Fatty were experienced cowboys who knew how to get their hands on hard-to-find bounty. Fatty was also a computer whiz, which helped compensate for Edward's absence.
The Bebop had to land in Tharimar, the moon's biggest city. The engines would have been ruined by the sand. Their first stop was one of the oddest experiences any of them had ever had. The location was New Atlantis. If the title doesn't give it away, New Atlantis was a unique city located under water in Titan's only sea. The big glass bubble that housed the city reminded Lau of the San Francisco domes (which were now scheduled for demolition). It upset him to think that after all his father had suffered building those things, they were going to be destroyed.
Jet smiled as he looked up their first target in the area. This one should sound familiar. It was none other than our good friend Abdul Hakim himself. Only Jet, Spike, and Ein would have remembered the tall pet thief from Mars. In fact, catching Hakim was another huge factor in Jet choosing Titan. He remembered how frustrated Spike had been not catching him. Hakim had been released from prison on parole. He wasted no time violating his parole by robbing a bank on Tharsis. Bank robbery was not his usual routine. One could only suspect he had pulled the bank heist to fund whatever he was going to do next.The bounty was eight million.
The difficulty in catching Hakim this time around was that they had no insider tips on what he now looked like. Hakim changed his face as often as most people change their underwear. Using Spike's old sunglasses that had a facial analyzer built in, Lau started a day-long search for young men who were tall and lanky who liked to hang around pet shops.
Bounty hunting is a business that requires a lot of patience. It means spending hours, sometimes days, looking for the right guy. Faye, having no patience at all and feeling unneeded, managed to locate one of the more unique forms of gambling on Titan: pig racing. No one saw her for hours.
Every time a guy matching Hakim's description came by, Lau would use the glasses to scan their face. An analysis would compare Hakim's original face to the one Lau was looking at. Hours went by and Lau saw thirteen guys who turned out to be someone else. It wasn't all a waste. One of the guys he scanned turned out to be a car thief with a half-million bounty. Not wanting to blow his cover, Lau radioed the information to Fatty, who caught the guy a few blocks away.
Just as Lau was ready to pack up and go back, a message came over the communicator. It was Bob. "He's heading west! His face has not changed, repeat, his face has not changed!"
Bob had recognized Hakim and tried to nab him all by himself. However, Hakim was bigger and tougher. He gave Bob a beating and ran for it. Fatty, Jet, and Lau all mobilized, but Lau was the closest to him. He had seen Hakim's original face, but not the one he had when he ran into Spike. After a minute, a tall and lanky guy with a goatee and an afro came strolling down the street with a grin. He was feeling real cocky after having disposed of that pesky little bounty hunter. The glasses confirmed his identity. Lau strolled up to him casually as if to start a conversation. Unfortunately, Hakim could spot a cop or a cowboy from a mile away and started running. Lau was certainly glad he had quit smoking. He chased after Hakim. Hakim headed for a bridge leading to a transport center. The center had submarines that took people to and from the surface.
About then Hakim made a mistake. He realized he didn't have enough of a lead on Lau to board one of the subs and decided to fight. After all, this guy didn't look so tough. Indeed Hakim was an unusually good fighter. Lau, however, turned out to be more than a match for him. After going at it for just a few moments, Hakim realized his mistake and tried to run for it again. This time his escape was cut off by a taxi. Faye emerged from the back with a drawn gun. One look at her face told Hakim that he'd better not mess with her. She had lost big time at the pig races. The Bebop made eight million for his capture. That put them in second place at the end of the first day of competition. The first place team made fifteen million. Fatty was tracking everything the other teams were doing with the computer, so he knew all about it.
Day two turned out to be unlucky. The hacker they were chasing drew a gun and Jet had to shoot him. He died at the hospital. The team in first place made another fifteen million that day. Only one other team made any cash that day. Sadly, one of the teams lost a member. He was shot to death by a drug dealer on Callisto. The bounty on this dealer was raised to eighteen million but he had disappeared. It was a bad day for the bounty hunting business.
Jet promised everyone that day three would be their last in New Atlantis. Fatty and Bob were hoping it would be their last day on Titan, period. But Jet insisted that Titan was by far the best place to work. He was right. Jet had compromised and they agreed to leave New Atlantis right away and hunt on the surface for one day. The Bebop team took the lead by catching an entire team of gold smugglers in the desert who were disguised as nomads. It was Faye who had spotted them. She couldn't help but notice that desert nomads don't typically wear designer jeans under their robes. The one bad thing about that day was when Faye wondered out loud if camels really do spit and within moments got her answer. Lau made the mistake of laughing at her and nearly had his hair ripped out by Faye.
That night, while Faye tried to wash the camel spit out of her hair (not an easy task, I assure you), Fatty pulled Jet aside. "Hey, take a look at this," he said, pointing to the computer. "All of the other teams are scheduled to leave Ganymede tomorrow. Jet, I'll bet you that as soon as they leave, every crook on Ganymede is going to breathe a sigh of relief and let his guard down."
"Yeah, but don't you think Ganymede's been pretty well picked clean by now?" asked Jet.
"Not a chance," replied Fatty. "The higher profile bounties that weren't caught may very well come out of the woodwork as soon as the others leave."
Jet took a look over at Lau who was sleeping on the couch. "I don't know," he replied. "That's pretty deep into the heart of syndicate country. Lau over there isn't exactly real popular with them."
"Jet, if we tip-toe our way around this, we'll lose the lead for sure," replied Fatty. "If your friend is that unpopular with the syndicates, then he can stay on the Bebop. The rest of us want to win."
"He's right, Jet," replied Bob. "Why did we come here if we didn't come to win?"
"OK, fine, we'll go," replied Jet. "But we're not leaving Lau on the ship. It might actually be safer for him if he went out with the rest of us."
Early the next morning, the Bebop left Titan and headed towards Jupiter. They had planned to touch down that day but something happened that prevented them. Fatty was sitting down to eat his favorite breakfast: a huge portion of powdered donuts and blueberry pie. Lau and Faye lost their appetites just watching him. Though they were disgusted, they couldn't look away for some reason. It was like watching a train wreck. Fatty noticed he was being watched. "What? What is it? Quit staring at me like that, you're freaking me out."
Lau and Faye said nothing but they both silently wondered just how many weirdoes Jet knew. Just then, the whole ship shook and alarms went off all over the place. Fatty choked on his food. Believe me, it's not easy giving the Heimlich to a guy as big as Fatty.
Jet ran in with a towel around his waist. He had been showering. "Lau, Faye, battle stations! We have company!" he yelled. And indeed they did. Several small vessels and one big cruiser were attacking the Bebop.
"It's the syndicate!" thought Lau to himself. "These people are going to get hurt because of me. I never should have come with." Lau was wrong. It wasn't the syndicate. It was some pirates. Space piracy was pretty common in that region.
I won't bore you with the details of the fight. It wasn't real exciting. The Bebop sustained only minor damage and Lau and Faye were more than victorious over the smaller ships. The large cruiser didn't try to run away until every single one of the smaller crafts had been destroyed. That was a mistake. The Bebop gave chase immediately. Then came mistake number two. The larger ship ran out of fuel. Jet couldn't help but grin and he pulled the Bebop up alongside the pirate ship and boarded. These must have been the dumbest and least skilled pirates of all time. They didn't get to Ganymede until well after three in the morning but it had been worth it. They picked up another ten million by turning in the pirates. Another bonus was that since the Bebop had arrived so late at night, no one had seen them arrive.
Lau awoke the next morning to the sound of glass breaking. As he stepped out of his bedroom he saw Faye storming angrily towards him. "It didn't count!" she yelled.
"What didn't count?" asked Lau who was still half-asleep.
"Those pirates we caught," replied Faye. "Since we caught them in space instead of on one of the moons, those bastards at ISSP won't count the ten million we collected on them towards the contest. We're in third place now!"
Ganymede is usually a hotbed of criminal activity. The whole moon was one big black market surrounded by water. But when the other bounty hunters had been there, the place had never been so quiet. Now that they were gone, it was business as usual. Lau, Faye, and Bob didn't even bother checking the database that day. They were feeling more than a wee bit impatient after the pirate thing. They just walked into a crowded marketplace and started rounding up everyone who was doing something illegal. Then they put them together in a sort of chain gang and marched them through the crowded streets straight over to ISSP headquarters. It did wonders for cheering up Faye. ISSP told them it would take some time to process all the people they had caught. They left without having any idea what they would end up collecting.
Jet and Fatty had a different sort of plan. They ignored the black market entirely and went after a prominent loan shark. They waited for his car to leave his office and when they saw it coming, Fatty threw himself in front of it. The loan shark hit the brakes. Of course he hadn't even touched him but Fatty pretended he's been hit. He put on quite a performance. "Oh, I've been hit! I'm done for! Who will provide for my wife and family?" The loan shark stood over Fatty. "Oh, mister, if I die, will you please give a message to my family for me?" croaked Fatty. The loan shark leaned over to hear the message. "Gotcha!" whispered Fatty into his ear.
Jet came up from behind and tackled the guy. "Don't struggle, or I'll have Fatty over here sit on you!" warned Jet.
They took him over to the ISSP where they were still busy sorting out all of the people that Lau, Bob, and Faye had brought in. Donnelly gave Jet a dirty look as they brought yet another prisoner for processing. This guy was worth nine million. The last day of competition was tomorrow so Jet was unsympathetic to the busy police officers.
That night, they watched news coverage of a major bust on Callisto. One of the other teams had nabbed a syndicate kingpin. They were now in the lead. Without the results of what the Bebop team had caught in the market, they had fallen to last place.
"This isn't fun at all," complained Faye. "It feels all wrong rushing through this whole thing just so we can stay ahead of the pack."
"Well you can console yourself with all that prize money, little lady," replied Fatty.
"That's only if those guys we caught were worth anything," added Lau.
Jet noticed that Bob had walked away. He looked around for a while and finally found him in a storage locker.
"What are you doing in here Bob?" asked Jet. "You're missing all the fun of hearing Faye complain, and believe me, she makes an art form out of complaining." Bob didn't laugh. Jet sighed and sat down next to him. "Still thinking about Tim?" he asked. Bob nodded.
"It just seems like a bad dream, Jet," he said. "I just can't picture a twelve year old boy going through all that effort just to get back at his father. He still won't tell me what I did wrong."
"How's he doing?" asked Jet.
"He got placed in a psychiatric hospital," replied Bob. "The nurses there coddle him so much and treat him like he's the victim and me like I'm the bad guy. I don't get it."
Jet patted Bob on the shoulder. "You're no villain Bob. What happened wasn't your fault and it might not be his fault either. Some people are just mentally ill. No one means for it to happen."
Bob looked over at Jet. "How about you? I haven't asked you how you're doing after losing Spike."
"I'm still taking it day by day and I have been for more than a year now," replied Jet. "It still hurts, no question." Jet didn't feel particularly obligated to say anything about Ed.
"Jet, we got him!" yelled Lau from down the hall.
"Got who?" replied Jet.
"That guy that shot that bounty hunter," replied Lau. "ISSP just called and apparently he was one of the people we rounded up today. We're in first place."
Everyone was ecstatic over the news that night but the final day of the contest turned up nothing. They didn't catch a single bounty. Their mass arrest the day before had drawn too much attention and there wasn't enough time to try another moon. They could only hope the other teams were having bad luck as well. That evening, everyone sat around the TV for the 11:30 news.
"...and in other news, as the bounty hunting contest draws to a close there is a narrow margin between first and second place. Team Callisto leads Team Bebop by a mere forty wulongs with only minutes left. It seems safe to say that Team Callisto is the winner." Everyone groaned in agony after hearing that news. After everything they had been through it didn't seem possible that they could lose it all now.
Suddenly Lau had an idea. He grabbed Faye by the arm. "Come on, we can still win this thing," he said.
"Forget it kid," replied Fatty. "Whatever you have in mind won't work. If you left this very second you would barely have enough time to make it to the nearest police station, much less locate, catch, and turn in a bounty head."
Lau ignored him. "Come on Faye, I'm telling you we still have one more chance. I'll explain on the way." He practically dragged her to the hangar.
One hour later, Faye returned alone. She walked in, smiled and shook her head like she couldn't believe it (and she couldn't). "Well, we won," she said.
"What?!" yelled Jet. "But how? You couldn't possibly have had enough time. Who did you bring in?"
"Lau," replied Faye. "Lau had a five hundred bounty on him for failure to appear in court after a bar fight on Venus a couple years ago. The silly fool made me turn him in. According to the rules, it counts. We won."
They all had a good laugh over that one. All of them except Lau. The police couldn't even put him in a holding cell for fear that one of the people he had arrested would kill him. He had to be locked in an interrogation room all night long. So while his teammates were breaking out the champagne, he was trying to get to sleep on a cold tile floor. But he couldn't help thinking to himself that it was worth it.
The next day he went to court and the judge slapped him with a three million fine but he was free to go. With the prize money in hand, he felt like he was on top of the world. They could finally pay off Faye's long-term debts (the hospital bill and those debts she had been conned into accepting were waived by the court months ago). Now Lau and Faye were both completely free with no debts, no price on their heads and some money to spare.
Fatty and Bob headed home the next day. Fatty was considering taking his fifty million and opening up his own pie shop. Jet couldn't help but laugh at an image of Fatty going out of business after eating his entire inventory. As for Bob, he planned to keep working. He decided to take Jet's advice and keep busy so he could cope better with his situation.
After Bob and Fatty left, Lau, Faye and Jet had a chance to sit back and discuss the future. "So what now Jet? Do we keep working? Do we go back to Earth or stay on Mars?" asked Lau.
"It feels so weird," said Jet. "I have never in my whole life had so much money that I could choose whether or not to work. I say we hang around here for a while and keep working the way we used to. If nothing else, it'll keep us occupied and keep society a little safer."
Faye grinned at him. "Jet Black, you could have all the money in the world and you would just keep working, wouldn't you? Face it, this line of work is in your blood. Are you ever even going to spend that money?"
Jet thought for a minute. "You know, I could start looking for an investment to use that cash on. No pie shops though. How about you two?"
"Maybe I could buy a condo somewhere," replied Lau. "But I've already spent some of my money."
"Oh you did, did you?" replied Faye. "And on what, pray-tell, have you squandered away your hard earned cash for which you spent time in jail?"
Lau smiled. Very slowly he pulled a small velvet box out of his pocket and opened it. It contained a diamond ring. He got down on one knee. "Faye will you marry me?"
Faye was so stunned that she couldn't speak. She just covered her mouth with her hands and nodded as tears rolled down her face. Jet smiled and walked out of the room to give them some time alone. He looked out a window at the night sky. "Well Spike, I bet you thought neither one of us would ever see THAT happen. Hey...why am I so itchy?"
MAZEL TOV, SPACE COWBOY
(c) 2004 Joseph Kerner
jak981125@catholic.org
Disclaimer: I did not create Cowboy Bebop. I wish I had, but I didn't. This is just fanfiction